


Turn Off The Lights

by Souliebird



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Demons, Alternate Universe - Shapeshifters, Blood, Domestic, Gore, M/M, Masturbation, Nosebleed, Occult, Sexual Content, Soft Horror, Supernatural Elements, There Are Spookums
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2018-09-19 18:00:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 146,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9453377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Souliebird/pseuds/Souliebird
Summary: Sugawara Koushi retreated to a cabin in the woods to work on his latest manuscript, not to adopt an oddly intelligent dog and be introduced to the world of the supernatural.





	1. Thai Chiles

Sugawara stared up at the cabin standing in front of him, wondering if his manager was actually trying to punish him. Sure, he was four months late for turning in the first rough draft of his latest novel that he still hadn’t actually finished, but in his defense, he had come down with a nasty case of bronchitis and had been bedridden for weeks. Then Oikawa had gotten married and that had been an ordeal in itself and how was Suga supposed to write when trying to act as a best man. Really Kiyoko should have given him some leeway, she could have been understanding. 

Not book him a wooden cabin in the middle of the woods when he had said he wanted to go somewhere quiet and away from everything to write. He had not meant for her to take him so literally.

The nearest town was a twenty minute bike ride away and the cabin looked like it had been built some time in the Meiji period. 

He felt like he was in the start of some horrible American horror film and that a serial killer was going to start taunting him after spending his first night in the woods. The entire area gave off a creepy, haunted vibe fit for a slasher film. 

But he kind of liked that.

At least the cabin had high speed internet and its own hot spring, by what he had been told. 

Maybe Kiyoko did know how to treat him right. 

It made sense, Sugawara was writing a horror novel and really, creepy and haunted were completely in his aesthetic. He owned several decorative skulls, after all. 

Setting his bags down on the pathway, Suga pulled his phone out from his pocket and turned so his back was facing the cabin. He brought up the camera app and snapped a selfie of himself with a pleasant smile. He took a moment to play with the filters and picture editor to give the selfie a faded, wilted discoloration, and black goo streaking down his face like tears, making him look like some sort of ghost. 

He posted it to his social media page with the caption of “Off to play with Friends!” 

Kiyoko commented a moment later; a very simple and direct ‘get to work’. 

Suga stuck his tongue out at his phone, then pocketed it, grabbed his bags, and began to haul them up the path to the cabin. Perhaps he should have asked the cab driver for help moving everything inside, but it had been getting late. The sun was already starting to set and Suga had not wanted the kind man to be driving through the woods during the dark. 

Granted there was literally only one road and it did have street lights, but it was more the principle of the matter. He had seemed nervous about the fading light.

The inside of the cabin was surprisingly as gorgeous as the outside was creepy. Whoever had done the renovations, which had not been noticeable from the exterior, had gone all out. Shiny dark woods and polished appliances with lush, lavish furniture; it looked like it had come out of some fancy magazine that showed how the rich and famous lived. There were soft silver accents in decorations and the mantle of the fireplace sported a series of candles that gave the cabin just a hint of hominess, making it all feel less stuffy. The space appeared to be twice as big as it actually was and it was like he had walked into some five star hotel. 

Suga felt no guilt that all of the beauty was completely lost on him and that he would spend most of his time in his pajamas and eating chips out of the bag while laying on the couch. He knew exactly what kind of person he was. 

He felt lucky, that while the cabin was actually raised up off the ground, it was only one floor. There was absolutely no way he would be lugging his suitcase, which he had managed to make weigh more than himself, up more than one flight of stairs. It was just not going to happen. 

The bedroom was in the back corner of the house and just as decadent as the main living space, with one wall mostly comprised of a floor to ceiling window that led out to a balcony. He laid down on the enormous bed to get a feel for it and concluded quickly that he would be spending a month sleeping on a cloud. A very large, midnight blue cloud with gold accents in some sort of spooky heaven. 

Suga was thrilled. 

The room had a modestly sized en suite, with a large bath and a shower with way too many knobs in it. He was not in the mood to test them, because Suga knew how easily he could lose himself doing such a thing, and he went back into the bedroom, walking straight across the room to the attached balcony. 

It was large and overlooked the back lawn and the small, natural hot spring that had been advertised with the property. Suga moved to lean against the railing, pushing his chest out over it and peering around. The trees were close enough he could see the leaves, even through the darkness that had taken over the sky. The air smelled like moss and dirt and it felt so clean and crisp, so very different from the smoggy city air he was used to breathing. 

Maybe he could actually clear his head out here, sit down and write like he really meant to and not end up wasting his days researching, watching movies, or going out. It was why he had come all the way across the country, after all? Locking himself up in a hotel room back home had done absolutely nothing for his work ethic. Oikawa had still been able to call him, to tempt him away from his laptop with promises of drinks and food and not writing. Out in the woods, there was none of that.

He knew, to others, it sounded like writing was a chore he constantly tried to put off, but it was the furthest thing from the truth. He loved writing, pouring his imagination into scenes to share with the world, but sometimes it was tiring and the words would just not come. He had been in a slump since he had gotten sick; nothing sounded right and the flow was all off. He just couldn’t concentrate. Avoiding it had been easier than trying and disappointing himself when he couldn't produce. 

Especially when he was trying something completely new to him and was terrified about how it was going. Kiyoko was an amazing manager and friend, but what he was currently writing was not her cup of tea and he didn’t really have anyone else to share his excitement over the plot with. Oikawa absolutely refused to listen to anything Suga had to say until the work was published and on the shelf. Something about the twists and surprises being spoiled otherwise. His so called best friend often had the audacity to start humming loudly whenever Suga so much as mentioned his work in progress. 

Thinking of his best friend, Suga pulled his phone from his pocket once again and took a few steps back. He held up the device horizontally, trying to catch that he was standing on the balcony while taking a picture of the woods. It took a few tries to snap the perfect, though slightly dark image. Nothing a filter couldn’t fix.

As Suga flicked through the different options, his eyes caught a small detail he hadn’t seen while he had taken the photo. A pair of small, round, slightly glowing orbs between two trees. He couldn’t make out the shape of what the eyes belonged to, but he felt himself begin to smile. The cab driver had told him the area was crawling with deer, and that they were not very scared of humans. They often came right up to people on the street and tried to get into their pockets, looking for food. 

Maybe if Suga got up early enough in the mornings, there would be deer on the small lawn surrounding the cabin and he could feed them carrots or whatever vegetables he happened to have. Maybe he could even pet one.

He still had to go shopping the next day, so Suga made the mental note to load up on carrots. Hopefully the little market he had seen in town sold them by huge bags. 

Pleased with his discovery, Suga uploaded the photo to his account, giving it the caption ‘Perfect place to kill someone : )’ and tagging Oikawa. 

He waved out to the two trees the possible deer had been between, silently wishing it a good night, before going back into the cabin. He made his way to the living room, grabbing the tote bag full of groceries he had brought with him. It wasn’t anything mildly respectable or healthy; it had all been bought from the train station while he had been waiting for his taxi to arrive. But instant coffee and ramen bowls would get him through the night, and hopefully the morning. He wasn’t exactly fond of eating the instant noodles twice in a row, but it was his own fault he hadn’t thought ahead. He had been too excited to see where he would be staying. 

Suga looked through the kitchen in search of a tea kettle and was once again impressed by the quality of everything. There were lights on the insides of the cabinets and it was impossible to shut the drawers too hard; they sort of slowed on their own and closed silently. Even the faucet was high-tech; the water shining red when it was hot and blue when cold. 

He was starting to feel slightly out of place and like there was no way he could afford to stay in such a luxurious cabin for a month. 

Suga set the kettle onto the stove, then brought out his phone, selecting Kiyoko’s name from his contact list.

She picked up on the second ring. 

“Sugawara-san. What a pleasant surprise. I thought you would be writing by now.” 

Sugua wrinkled his nose, “I’m getting to it. I was going to have some dinner first. I can’t write on an empty stomach.” 

“Of course not,” Kiyoko said, sounding like she absolutely did not believe him. 

“Anyways,” Suga started, trying to not huff a bit, “I know I left some of the planning of this trip up to you-”

“You left all of it up to me, Sugawara-san.” Kiyoko interrupted. 

“Ah, yes. Okay, I know I left all of the planning up to you, and I very much appreciate all of the effort you put into sending me across the country so that I could write-”

“Write? You told me you just had to edit, Sugawara Koushi.” Suga held his phone away from his ear at the chill that had been in Kiyoko’s voice.

“It’s a general term, Kiyoko-san! Write, edit, plot, research, it is all semantics!”

She didn’t respond and Suga knew he had been caught in his lie. 

“But, more important matters! I wanted to ask my very lovely and very amazing, patient and understanding manager exactly how much is this cabin costing me? Don’t get me wrong, I completely adore it, I’d live here in a heartbeat, but...This is more fancy than that hotel you got me back in New York.”

Kiyoko was a silent for a few moments and Suga was scared he had broke her with his earlier slip up. 

“It’s twenty nine thousand yen a night.” 

It was her turn to break him.

“Excuse me? Are you sure that is right? Are we missing a zero?”

Kiyoko gave the tiniest huff of amusement, “No, Sugawara-san. The owner has been having trouble renting the property because of the location. He dropped the price for a month long stay.”

The words took a moment to register in Suga’s mind; what would the location have to do with- He gasped, “Is it haunted?!”

Kiyoko gave a real laugh at the excitement in his voice, “That is the rumor. It had been abandoned in the woods for years, after the disappearance of the previous owners. The surrounding forest also has an unpleasant history. There aren’t any real attractions around the area, so no one had wanted to rent out the space. You are actually the first person to stay at the property since it has been renovated.” 

“That’s so cool!” Suga whispered, grinning ear to ear. “Kiyoko-san found me an extra cool haunted house! Remind me when I get back to give you a bonus!” 

“I already took care of that, Sugawara-san.”

Suga chuckled. “Of course you did.” 

There was a moment of pause, before, “So, Sugawara-san, tell me exactly how much more do you need to write before you start to edit?” 

Suga winced, “What was that, Kiyoko-san? I’m sorry, I can’t hear you, I think you’re breaking up. I’m going through a tunnel!” He pulled his phone away from his ear and hit the ‘end call’ button. 

He was still, just for a brief second, before he burst into giggles and began to hop excitedly around in a circle. “Haunted house! Creepy woods! Awesome hot spring! This month is going to be amazing! Oh! Oh! I have to tell Tooru!” 

He brought his phone to his face, hunching over and speaking the words as he typed up his email. 

“Kiyoko rented me a haunted house in the middle of questionable woods. Smiley face. Heart.” 

His phone vibrated in his hands less than a minute after he sent the message. He laughed at Oikawa’s response of ‘you’re going to die. leave me your dvd collection.’ Suga set his phone on the counter, still grinning, then returned to preparing his store bought meal. 

He felt completely inspired to write, and thought to the last scene he had finished. The words and actions flowed through his mind’s eye, and he knew, when he finally sat in front of his laptop after eating, he’d be able to finish the chapter that had been troubling him for months. 

+++

Suga frowned as he shoved loose carrots into one of his totes. There were no bagged vegetables to be seen anywhere in the tiny supermarket. It was a slight inconvenience, because he had only brought so many totes with him and he was wasting the space filling one with vegetables he would only eat half of. Well, maybe not so much a waste. Vegetables increased his chances of petting friendly forest dwelling creatures and it wasn’t like he couldn’t just come back down to the store the next day. He wasn’t stocking up on food for the month then hermiting himself away in the cabin, never to be seen again. 

Though, the thought did sound appealing, from a writer’s perspective. Locked away in the wilderness, no one to talk to or interact with, slowly driving himself mad with his own artistic work, the spirits that haunted the cabin slowly guiding him over the edge until he was writing ‘red rum’ on the bathroom mirror. 

But that had obviously been done before and ghost horror wasn’t his shtick. Plus, he had his phone and wifi and plenty of things to do without talking to people. That kind of psychological horror wasn’t as appealing in a modern setting, at least to him. He knew people who could have survived the Overlook Hotel if they had their gaming devices in hand. 

At least he still had the chances of a random serial killer coming out to the woods to play games with him. 

Suga smiled to himself at his own kind of thinking. Everyone always told him he was a little off, and not just because he adored horror and the occult. He always wanted to encounter bizarre scenarios, things that would be at home in one of the books he tended to write. And exactly for those purposes. 

He wanted to know what it truly felt like to run for his life, to feel the adrenaline and fest pumping through his veins, so he could accurately describe it. He wanted whoever read his books to feel like they were in danger with the characters. 

Of course, he'd never seek out danger, he wasn't out of his mind or anything. He just liked to dream, perhaps a little too much. He always had. 

Suga finished gathering what he would buy, having planned out a menu in his head. He had a craving for soup, and it would last him a few meals. After the initial cooking, he would just have to heat some up when he got hungry and could have all of his focus on writing. 

Hopefully.

He walked up to the counter with a smile, his totes bulging with food.

“Hello!” 

The woman behind the counter smiled back at him and began to help him in unpacking, ringing him up as she did.

“Hello. Are you new to the town or visiting family?” She asked.

Suga blinked at such a direct question, “Ah, visiting, but not family. Kind of a vacation.”

The woman peeked up from counting the potatoes he was buying, surprised. “A vacation? Here?”

“Kind of,” he repeated, “I'm here to work, but I need to get away from distractions to do so.”

“Oh!” She gasped, then leaned forward and asked in a hushed voice, “Are you an artist?”

Suga chuckled and gave her a soft smile, “A writer.”

“That is so charming! And you chose our town to come to! It is such an honor, we hardly ever get visitors. We are such a small town, I hope you find inspiration.” The woman bowed her head slightly and Suga felt himself begin to blush.

“Thank you.”

“Are you staying at the inn? It is next to the main road, it can get quite noisy in the evening.” 

Suga shook his head and started to help the attendant place his items back in his totes. “No, there is the little cabin up the mountain a bit I've rented.”

The woman's face fell slightly and Suga wondered if he had said something wrong. Kiyoko had mentioned the house and area had a history.

“The Sawamura house?” She asked in a whisper.

“I'm, ah, not sure.”

“It must be,” the attendant said to herself before looking back to Suga with a sad smile. “They were good people, that cabin was in their family for generations. Very kind people. Then just one day, they all up and disappeared. Their son, Daichi, I believe he was called, was away with the military at the time. He came back for a bit, then left us again without saying goodbye to anyone.” She paused, then gasped and waved a hand at Suga, “No one suspects anything foul! It was just strange. One day they were there, then poof! Gone, but everything was still up at the house.”

“So it isn't haunted?” Suga asked, trying to not sound disappointed. 

“No, not that cabin. But the woods,” The woman wrinkled her nose and shook her head. “They are cursed. Bad things happen there. People go missing. They say there are demons there.”

“Demons?” He asked, his interest piqued. Demons were almost as good as ghosts. 

“An angry dragon and a man with a head and arms, but no chest. Sometimes there are horrible sounds, screaming, and they will find boars and deer that have been eaten, and-” She stopped herself, her eyes going wide. She gave a fake laugh, “But I'm sure it's just someone's dog that has gotten out. We have many hunting dogs here. And animals make all sorts of strange noises! You'll be perfectly safe up in the cabin! The Sawamura’s lived there for years without problem.”

Suga had to hold back a pout. She thought she was scaring him with her local legends, but it was just the opposite. He wanted to hear more about the haunted woods and the monsters that lived in them. He'd have to see what he could find online.

But to soothe the attendant, he gave a pleasant smile, “I'm sure I will be fine.”

“Of course, you will!” She said back, the little laugh she gave after sounding more genuine. 

The chatter switched to something more neutral, the kind woman telling him about the restaurants in town and what would and would not deliver up the mountain to the cabin. He learned quickly it was more about people not wanting to go into the woods than having to drive or bike the short distance. That made him feel a little giddy; it wasn’t just the shop attendant who was weary of the forest; it seemed to be the whole town. It explained the nervousness of the cab driver the night before. Maybe there was something to the rumor about people disappearing and ghastly screams. Suga was definitely going to have to Google it. 

He paid for the groceries and the woman, whose name he learned was Abe, followed him out of the store and helped him load everything up onto the bike that had been by the cabin’s porch. 

“Ah, Writer-san,” She called out, just as Suga prepared to start riding off, “be careful the next few days! It is supposed to storm and the mountain road is not well maintained. It would not be safe for you to ride on it. The store number is on the receipt! If you need anything when it is raining, please call and I can send my son up to you with it.”

Suga blinked at her unexpected kindness, then bowed as best he could while straddling his bike. “Thank you so much, Abe-san. You are very kind.” 

She blushed and waved her hand at him before scurrying back into the shop. 

Suga did not see the storm clouds gathering on the horizon until he started to pedal up the mountain. He was glad he had opted to buy things to make soup instead of being irresponsible and eating junk food. If he had plenty of soup he didn’t have to worry about going back out in the rain to get supplies. He wouldn’t burden Abe-san’s son with bringing him up chips or more onions. He would be perfectly fine. 

Suga enjoyed the rain and the soothing sounds it made. He wondered if it would sound different from it did in his apartment back home. City rain was definitely not the same as backwoods country rain. Country rain would lock him in the cabin and keep him from going out. 

Which would be one way to get him to sit down and write. He had gotten through a chapter and half the night before, which sounded much more impressive than it actually was. It was short, a snippet from a perspective of a side character. While crucial, and having been the bane of Suga’s writer’s block, it had only taken up a grand total of six pages. But, all in all, it was progress, which was the most important thing.

And he couldn’t even tell anybody because Kiyoko wanted him done with the novel yesterday and Oikawa had blocked any messages from him that contained the word ‘writing’. 

He had such great friends. 

The storm moved quicker than Suga did, and it began to sprinkle as he huffed and puffed his way up the trail. He had forgotten, in all his brilliance, that going up a hill was much more difficult than going down it, especially with the added weight of groceries. In his defense, at least, he had not ridden a bike in a very long time and he was slightly out of shape.

When he finally arrived at the cabin, the rain was coming down more steadily and he was becoming quite cold. He dismounted the bike and began to push it through the mud, wheezing slightly as he did. As Suga got closer to the porch, he noticed that he was not alone. Two grand looking crows were sitting on the railings, watching him walk up. The one closest to the steps canted its head at him and cawed loudly. 

“Hello to you, too” Suga replied, eying the birds. He had never really seen a crow close up before, and he had never realized how large they were. Each of the birds in front of him would come up to his knees and could easily carry off an average sized house cat. They were massive. Suga suddenly understood why the cities thought of the birds as a menace. 

The crow cried at him again, adding in a flap of its giant wings. Suga frowned up at the pair of birds in front of him, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what you want. There is more than enough room here for all of us if you need shelter from the rain. Oh, I know!” Suga burst into a grin, then turned to dig through one of the tote bags, steadying the bike with his legs as he did. When he found what he wanted, he pulled out a pre-cut loaf of bread and took out a few slices. 

“Would you like some food?” He asked, showing the crows the bread. The birds looked at each other, looking to Suga like they were debating the offer between themselves. The crow closer to stairs snapped its beak at the other, then its friend ruffled up its feathers before hopping down from the railings and gliding over to land a few paces in front of Suga. He tossed a slice to the bird, who caught it expertly, then tilted its giant head back to devour the bread whole. 

Suga looked up to the other crow still perched on the railing and waved the other slice at it. ‘“It’s good,” he said, “It’s cinnamon raisin. Birds can have cinnamon, can’t they?” He wasn't actually sure, but the spice didn't seem dangerous to Suga. 

After a moment, the crow finally flew down to stand in front of Suga. It flapped its wings at him, showing off how massive it truly was, and cawed loudly. Suga tossed the slice of bread at it, and unlike its friend, the crow got smacked right in the face with it. Suga brought his hands up to cover his mouth, trying to hide his laugh.

“I’m sorry!”

The affronted crow gave an undignified squawk and scrambled to snatch up the bread before it fell into the mud. Its friend flapped its wings and cawed, sounding far less aggressive than the other crow, and Suga got the distinct impression it was laughing. 

The silver haired man smiled as the crow gobbled up its treat and began to push the bike up the steps to the porch. Once he parked it in a dry spot, he fished out his keys and began the process of moving all of his groceries into the kitchen.

“Why did I buy so much?” He complained to no one as he made his third trip out to the porch. Granted he was only bringing in two bags at a time and only had one more left to retrieve, but it still felt like so much. 

The crows were back on the railing, leaning sideways and turning their large heads to and fro to watch Suga walk to the bike. He hauled the tote up into his arms, then turned to the birds and waved a finger at them. “I don’t have any more food for you, right now. But I will have scraps later.” The crows blinked slowly at him and Suga knew he was being silly. They couldn’t understand him, they were birds. But it was nice to feel like he wasn’t talking to himself. 

“Stay dry,” he told them as he went back inside the cabin. One of the crows, the slightly larger one who had been able to catch its bread, cawed softly at him as he closed the door. 

Suga wondered if they would actually stick around, staying on the porch to wait out the rain. Did crows like the rain? He couldn’t remember if he had seen them out during storms in the city, but then again, he never really paid attention. If they were still there, after he had made his soup, his would bring them the promised scraps. Maybe, if he did that, they would tell all their bird friends and the porch would be covered in giant black birds. That image was right up his alley and would make an amazing picture.

Though, he probably would not try to pet them. That seemed a bit more dangerous than petting a deer. 

Suga took his time to put everything away, making up a storage system as he went along. He was lucky that the cabin had come with cutlery and dishes, but he had still needed to buy paper towels and foil. He hadn’t found any when he had dug around the night before. 

He kept out the things he would use to make his soup. It would be on the hearty side, with a rich broth and lots of root vegetables. He was excited for it; it was one of the few things he could cook well. He had the tendency to get lost in his own thoughts and often burned food, which was much harder to do with soup. 

Suga took his time to wash and peel the vegetables, taking care to put the scraps into a bowl. When he chopped them, he did the same, placing the rough ends of the carrots, celery, potatoes, and parsnips in as well. He didn’t know the diet of a crow, but if all else, he could toss them on the lawn in the back and hope a deer or rabbit found them. 

Suga took up humming as he began to sautee the vegetables, a tune whose name he could not remember, but he knew it well enough. He added in the stock and the spices, glad he had actually remembered to get them. The cabin had been completely barren of food. Most likely because he was the first person to actually stay in the cabin in a long time. 

Suga wondered what the house was like before it had gotten renovated. The bones of the building seemed like they hadn’t been changed; everything just seemed like it had been updated and polished and given a slightly Western feel. Had the original owners had a more traditional style? Would they have liked what had been done to their home; all the fancy lights and soft closing drawers? 

Would they have liked the six burner stove with its own little grill? 

Because while Suga wasn’t a fan of some of the lavish things that had come with the cabin, he actually rather liked the stove. It was cooking his soup very well. 

Until all the power suddenly cut out. 

Thunder roared outside, like it had come to life right above the cabin. It made Suga jump and scream, stumbling back into the counter. He clutched at his heart, feeling it slam in his ribs. 

He had not expected the storm to get there so suddenly or so violently. 

Suga took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, then stepped forward, reaching out in the dark to feel along the stove. Before he managed to burn his hand, he found the knobs and clicked them off. He didn’t want to risk them turning on suddenly and shorting out. His next step was to take the pot off the stove. He knew vaguely where the refrigerator was in relation to where he was standing and shuffled towards it, careful to not slosh the soup around. He almost failed when another clap of thunder made the cabin shake. 

“You could have waited!” Suga yelled up at the ceiling as he steadied himself again. He found the fridge and opened it, silently cursing that he couldn’t see inside. He felt around using the pot, bumping it into shelves until he found a place it would fit. He shut the door, pushing against it slightly to make sure it stayed closed. It would be a shame if his food spoiled because he couldn’t see that the refrigerator had been open. 

He turned and leaned back in the fridge, frowning to himself. He didn’t exactly know what to do now. He had no idea where the generator for the cabin was; he had never thought to ask. He thought about working on his novel, straining his eyes in the dark to type, but that didn’t sound appealing for a myriad of reasons, the first being he didn’t want to strain his eyes. He also didn’t want to waste the battery of his phone or laptop. He had his tablet, but without the wifi, it would be all but useless. 

He would just have to wait until the power came back on and pray that he didn’t have to go manually restart it. The house was fancy enough it should do it on its own. Or at least Suga hoped so. 

He had books, but he had no idea where the candles or flashlights were, if there were even such items in the cabin. 

Suga slumped slightly and with a sigh, pushed himself off the fridge. He could only think of one solution to pass the time; he’d take a nap. Not exactly how he had wanted to spend his first day in the cabin, but it was far too dark to do anything. He could barely see in front of him. 

It was only early afternoon, but the rain clouds were angry and black and it was absolutely pouring out now. There was not an ounce of sunshine even peeking through. 

As Suga walked to the bedroom, a flash of lightning, strangely blue in color, lit up the main room, followed instantly by another boom of thunder. The windows rattled. 

“Oh, fuck off!” Suga huffed up at the ceiling, lifting up a hand and pointing his middle finger towards the sky. “I get it! It’s a storm!” 

He stuck out his tongue for good measure, then sulked to the bedroom. He changed from his jeans and sweater to a more comfortable sweatpants and t-shirt and crawled under the covers. He turned onto his side, watching the rain slam into the balcony through the large bay window. He had never seen a storm so violent before. He had been in typhoons before and his trip to New York had been marred by a hurricane, but this storm seemed so intense for something that had come on so quickly. 

The sky seemed like it was angry.

Maybe he shouldn't have yelled at it. 

“I’m sorry. Please don’t strike me with lightning.” He whispered. 

The sky flashed blue and the cabin shook more violently than it had before. Suga pulled the blankets up to his chin. 

“Oh my god, Tooru was right. I’m going to die here. Sugawara Koushi, killed because he stupidly told the gods to fuck off. All his belongings were left to one Oikawa Tooru, who told the press ‘I thought he was going to be eaten by a ghost.’” He mumbled to himself. 

He drew the blankets up over his head and turned over, his back facing the window. He settled, closing his eyes and listening to the sound of the rain. It was oddly lulling, despite how severe it was, and it did not take long for his body to start to relax. He was more tired than he realized; he had exerted a lot of energy while biking up the mountain. 

Maybe a nap wasn’t such a horrible idea. Hopefully the power would be back when he woke up, and Suga could sit down and properly write after finishing his soup. 

He drifted to sleep to the sound of distant thunder.

And woke to loud banging. 

Suga sat up, rubbing at the sleep in his eyes. The room was pitch black, no light filtering from under the door where he had left the lamps on in the living area, and he could hear the storm still raging outside. He pulled the blankets up and over his shoulder with a grumple, debating if he should go back to bed. It felt like it was late and he really did not want to go stumbling around in the dark.

There was more banging and Suga groggily realized it was coming from the window. A tree branch had probably broken off and hand landed on the balcony.

Suga rubbed at his eyes again as the banging continued. With a groan, he climbed out of bed and felt around the end table for his phone. Upon finding it, he turned on the flashlight app and shined it at the window. He nearly screamed when he saw a large crow standing just outside, tapping at the window with its beak, making the whole pane of glass rattle. 

Was it one of the birds he had fed earlier? Did it want more food? 

Hesitantly, Suga stepped towards the glass, watching as the crow stopped attacking his window to stare up at him. 

“What do you want?” Suga asked loudly, hoping the crow could hear him. It apparently did because it flapped its huge wings at him and cawed. 

The silver haired man stepped up the the sliding glass door and slowly reached his hand out to unlock it. What was he doing? This was insane, wasn’t it? It was just a bird. But it was watching his hand so intently and when he didn’t open the door, it cawed at him again. Like it was asking him to open up. Were crows smart enough to do that? He didn’t know., but this one seemed like it.

The bird tapped at the glass with its beak again and cawed , almost sounding desperate to Suga’s ears. 

Making up his mind, he unlocked the door and slid it open. 

To his surprise, the crow turned and took off, cawing even louder than before. Suga scowled to himself. What the hell had he been thinking? It was an animal and he wasn’t in one of his books. The bird had probably just been attracted to the light from his phone. He huffed to himself, then tried to slide the door back shut. It was stuck and would not budge. 

Groaning again in annoyance, he placed his phone in the breast pocket of his t-shirt and moved to grab the handle of the sliding door with both hands. The light on his phone shone out into the lawn as Suga turned and for the briefest moment, light reflected back at him in the shape of two orbs. 

Suga paused and turned to face the balcony, reaching up to tilt his phone around until whatever it was caught the light again. There was something definitely out there, but he couldn’t see it through the rain and darkness.

A crow cawed out, barely heard over the rain but sounding like it was coming from right where Suga was shining his light. 

He bit his lip and debated. It was a coincidence. The crow wasn’t calling out to him.

Suga was already stepping out into the rain before he could tell himself not to. His hair was instantly plastered to his forehead and he started to shiver as he was soaked with freezing water. He could barely see where he was going, but he kept moving forward until he bumped into the railing. He felt around, then used it to guide himself towards the ramp that went down to the lawn. The light from his phone did nothing to help him but it was comforting nonetheless. 

He made a noise of disgust when his bare feet hit the wet and squishy grass. Of course he hadn’t put on any shoes, he had just charged out into the pouring rain like a dumbass. But it was too late to go back up and put some on, and it would honestly be useless now.

Suga turned to and fro, trying to catch whatever was reflective with the light of his phone, but nothing shone back at him. He couldn’t even tell where it had been in terms of when he had been standing on the balcony. 

A loud caw came from his right and Suga whirled around, looking in that direction and failing to see anything. The crow called again and Suga stepped forward, slowly. 

Another caw, another step. Each cry got louder and louder until he could see the outline of something massive on the ground that had not been there the night before. Suga’s feet moved faster, carrying him closer to whatever it was. 

He gasped when it finally came into his full field of vision. 

It was the biggest dog he’d ever seen, laying on its side and panting heavily. He couldn’t tell if it had dark fur or if it was just completely covered in mud and grime, but it was looking right at him, and Suga felt his heart break. The beast wasn’t growling or snapping at him, it was just giving him this almost sad look. 

A caw came from right in front of him and the crow hopped into the meager amount of light offered by Suga’s phone. The bird looked from the dog to Suga, very pointedly and cawed again. The dog gave a kind of huff and laid its head back onto the ground, closing its eyes. 

Suga dropped to his knees into the mud beside the animal and reached out a shaking hand slowly towards the dog’s muzzle. Dogs were supposed to smell someone first before they touched them, right? Suga didn’t know, he’d never really interacted with a dog before, besides waving at them on the streets. 

“Hey, there, buddy.” 

The dog barely opened its eyes to look at him, before tilting its head just slightly to lick at Suga’s hand. Permission.

Suga ran his fingers slowly over the side of the dog’s face, trying to show he was no threat, before running his hands down its neck and body. Its fur was coarse and thick and Suga resisted the urge to bury his face and fingers into it. It was so warm despite the freezing rain, and Suga was soaked to the bone and losing feeling in his limbs. 

He didn’t know what he was doing, petting at the massive dog, but he knew something was wrong. The crow had called to him for the very reason, hadn’t it? Had gotten his attention and led him into the rain to show him the beast in front of him? It wasn’t just a coincidence.

Not with the way the crow was pressing itself into the dog’s neck, running its beak over the dog's ear like it was petting it too. 

As Suga’s hands moved further down the dog’s body, they encountered something wet and sticky. He hunched forward, angling his phone to illuminate his hands. They had developed a red sheen to them.

Suga inhaled sharply, then moved his fingers slowly and softly, pushing into the dog’s fur to feel around. The beast whimpered as Suga found the edge of the wound in its side. It extended from just past its ribs all the way to its hip and there were more cuts on its leg. 

Suga pulled his hands back and wiped the blood onto his sweatpants. 

“Okay,” he said mostly to himself, “Okay, lets….” The dog lifted its head again to look at him, still panting heavily. Suga reached out to pet behind its ear to try and soothe it, the crow moving away as he did. “Okay. We need to get you inside. I’ve patched Hajime up before and I’ve done a bunch of research. Theoretically, I can do this. I can do this.” He took a shaky breath, before nodding to the dog. “We just need to get you inside. Can you stand up? I don’t think I can carry you.” 

There was no way he could carry the creature. It was almost as long as he was tall and probably weighed twice as much; it felt like it was all muscle. 

The dog laid its head back down on the ground, closing its eyes again. Before Suga could start to protest, beg the dog to stay with him, the crow began to caw and poke at the beast with its beak. It flapped its wings a few times, smacking the dog in the back of the head, crying out each time it did. 

Like it was yelling at the dog.

After a few moments, the dog turned slightly to snap at the crow, but the bird hopped back, easily avoiding the dog’s jaws. With another huff, the beast slowly pushed itself into standing, swaying unsteadily as it did. When it was finally up, Suga swallowed, slightly nervous.

He had thought the dog was massive when it was laying down, but he had really had no idea. It was taller than Suga was when he was kneeling. 

Wanting to feel like the dog couldn’t crush him with just a look, Suga stood as well. He placed one hand on the beast’s back, curling his fingers into its thick fur. He didn’t know if it was to steady the dog or himself. 

“Okay...okay… um…” Suga peered around. He knew he was still on the lawn but he had no idea how to get back to the cabin. It was so dark, impossible to see outside the phone’s circle of light. He was an idiot, he should have thought before rushing out into storm. He was completely lost and freezing cold, and probably only a few meters away from the cabin. If he walked the wrong way, he’d end up in the woods with hypothermia.

The dog suddenly began to walk and Suga stumbled to follow it. It was clear the beast was limping and Suga pressed himself against the dog as they moved, trying to offer some support to it. 

The crow cawed from behind him and Suga turned. The bird had led him to the dog, was a it trying to lead him back to the cabin as well? He bit his lip and moved to step in the direction the noise had come from, but he was stopped. Something was pulling on him. Suga looked down to see the end of his shirt between the dog’s teeth. It tugged on him again, looking up at him with tired eyes. 

“But the…” Suga started. The dog pulled on his shirt a little harder. Suga curled his fingers more into the dog’s fur. “Okay.” 

The beast let go of him and they began trudging along again. Suga was only slightly surprised when his feet hit the wooden planks of the ramp up to the balcony. His free hand shot out and held onto the railing, clinging to it as they walked up. 

Suga almost slipped when they went in through the sliding glass door. He had never closed it and water had gathered inside the bedroom. He tried to pull at the window again and it easily slid shut. He quickly locked it. 

The dog bumped its head into Suga’s side and he buried his fingers into its wet fur again, not realizing how cold his hand had gotten when he had let go. Though, all of him was cold to the point he had gone numb, not even feeling how badly he was shaking. It probably wasn’t a good sign, but he had more important things to worry about.

“This way.” He whispered, taking the lead. He shuffled forward, leading the dog into the en suite. He set his phone on the counter, then let go on the dog to grab all the towels he could reach, dropping them to the floor. 

After that he turned and crouched in front of the sink, opening the cabinets and digging around for the first aid kit. He couldn’t find it. There were so many things under the counter and he couldn’t see and-

There was a loud mechanical whirring throughout the house and Suga jumped in surprise, banging his head on the bottom of the counter. 

“Ow! What the fu-”

The lights that illuminated the inside of the cabinets flickered to life. Suga grinned, glad something was going right. 

“The power is back!” 

He grabbed at the now visible first aid kit, then scrambled to stand and turn on the lights.

Suga’s breath caught in his throat.

The dog standing in his bathroom was not only gigantic, its shoulders were as high as the counters, but it was beautiful. Its fur was a gorgeous dark brown, bordering on black, with cream colored swirls going over its chest and shoulder, showing up again on its tail. Its eyes reminded Suga of amber and toffee and he wondered, if later, the dog would tolerate him taking a close up picture of its eye. 

But with the light, Suga also noticed the blood matting the left side of the beast. He bit his lip, then turned to kick at some of the towels, pulling them out and laying them across the floor. 

The dog seemed to understand what Suga was doing before he said anything and slowly laid itself down, not panting as hard as it had been earlier. Suga once again knelt beside it, dragging over the first aid kit. He parted the dark thick fur where the wound was; hissing in sympathy at how long it was. Luckily, it did not look to be that deep. It just looked extremely painful. 

But he could do this. He had stitched up Hajime plenty of times, when he had gotten into fist fights at school or hurt himself doing something stupid and he had done plenty of medical research to make his novels seem realistic. He just needed to clean the wound, stitch it, disinfect it, and wrap it. That wouldn’t be too hard. 

He glanced at the dog’s muzzle, and the canines almost as long as his fingers. 

“Please don’t bite me,” Suga asked in a whisper. “I’m trying to help.”

The dog blinked slowly at him, then leaned over and licked Suga’s hand.

“I don’t know if that was meant to be comforting, or if you were taste testing me.”

Suga put on gloves, then unwrapped one of the wet wipes that came in the first aid kit , taking a few tries to actually open it with his trembling hands, and began to dab at the wound, careful to not press down too hard. It looked like it had stopped bleeding for the most part; there were spots where it was deeper, where blood was still pooling. He used warm water from the sink cupped in his hands to rinse any debris out.

“What happened to you?” Suga asked in a hushed voice. “Did you get into a fight with something? It’s not a bite. Claws maybe? A blade? What could even do this? A human better not have done it.” 

Of course, the dog didn’t respond, just laid while Suga cleaned its wound. 

After wiping away the excess blood, Suga dug through the first aid kit, looking for what he needed. He set it all out in a row; suture, medical thread, antiseptic, and to his luck, spray anesthetic. He took up the bottle and read it over carefully, absorbing the directions. 

“Okay, this might sting at first.” He warned before spraying it into the wound. The dog yelped and its leg jerked up, hitting the wall, but it didn’t jump up, or more importantly, bite Suga. 

“I know, I know, I’m sorry.” He whispered, reaching out and petting at the dog’s neck. “I’m so sorry, but it will help. I hope. It doesn’t say if it should be used on animals or not. But, chemically, it is the same so it should work.”

The dog whimpered at him and Suga continued to pet at its fur, waiting a minute for the anesthetic to start working. 

Suga then reached for the suture and thread next, once again reading over the packaging. Once he was sure what to do, he opened both packets and tried to thread the suture. His hands were shaking so hard, from nerves and from the cold, that it took him almost two full minutes to get it right. The dog watched him the entire time.

“Okay…” Suga whispered, “Okay. I’m going to...I’m going to start.” 

He could do this.

The dog whimpered then laid its head back onto the ground, shutting its eyes. Suga leaned forward and pinched one end of the wound together. He had to take a few long, steadying breaths before finally pushing the needle through the wound. The beast in front of him whined, low in its throat and Suga’s heart ached.

“I know, I know, I’m so sorry. It will be okay,” he said as he pulled the thread taunt. He began the second stitch. “You are being so, so good. Such a good dog. A good boy,” Suga’s voice was starting to quiver as he worked. “If you are a boy, maybe you are a girl. If so, you are a good girl. Either way, you are a good dog, such a good, good dog.” He knew he was rambling as he carefully stitched the wound close, and that it was all for him. He needed the reassurance.

“It’s just this one, this big one on your side. And then I’ll wrap you up and...and I’ll get you something to eat. There is a fireplace, out there, with some logs already by it. I think I’ll make a fire. That will warm you up...warm me up. It’s so cold. I’m so cold. Such an idiot, huh? Running out into the rain without shoes or a jacket. Still in the wet clothes. It’s okay, though. You need help first.” He was halfway through the wound and his hands had started to shake less. Just slightly. “You have a good friend, the crow. I hope he is okay, too, out of the rain. I have, um, peelings and stuff for them. Him and the other one. They are the same birds, right? They looked the same to me. And...ah. I’m sorry, these are really crappy stitches, but I’m done. I’m, uh, done.” 

He tied off the thread in a knot, the cut it. Only when he stopped babbling to himself did he hear a very soft thumping. He turned his head towards the noise and smiled.

The dog was wagging its tail against the floor. Suga leaned up and scratched the beast behind its ear. “Good dog.” 

The dog very suddenly pushed itself up into standing and Suga fell back onto his butt. “Oh, be careful, you don’t want to- ah!!”

The dog turned so it was facing Suga and began to lick at his face, tail thumping against the cabinets at a faster pace. The silver haired man laughed and reached up to scratch at the dog’s neck. 

“You are welcome! You’re welc -oof!” The dog pushed forward, knocking Suga to the ground and stood over him, still slowly licking at his cheeks. Suga just laughed more. “I get it! You are welcome! I still need to wrap you up though, silly dog! Off! Off!” 

The dog pulled back, looking down at Suga with its head cocked to one side. It gave him one last lick, right on the nose, before back up and sitting down. Suga pushed himself up, then wiped at his face with with his still soaking shirt. It just made his cheeks wetter. 

He grabbed for the tube of antiseptic, then looked to how the dog was positioned. “I think you need to stand up,” the dog did, “And turn this way.” The beast angled itself in the way Suga had told it to and he didn’t think twice about the fact the dog had understood and obeyed his commands. He scooted forward, then took up the antiseptic. He smeared some of his fingers, then rubbed it over the stitches and the rest of the cuts, careful to not press too hard. Once he was satisfied with the amount of cream, he grabbed the gauze and slowly began to wrap it around the dog’s middle. 

“So, I see you are a boy,” Suga said conversationally. The dog looked back at him, one ear angled to the side, and snorted in his face. “I didn’t know! It wasn’t that important to check.” The dog huffed and Suga stuck out his tongue at him. 

He finished wrapping the gauze around the wounds, then sighed. “Okay, that should do it…” The adrenaline he hadn’t known he had been running on was starting to fade and the cold that he had been ignoring was suddenly forefront in his mind. With shaking hands, Suga pulled off the gloves, his shirt, then stripped himself of his sweats and briefs. He picked up a towel that was not yet soaked and began to dry himself, rubbing his arms to try to get feeling back into them. 

He didn’t notice the dog staring at him until it was too late. 

The beast moved forward, walking straight into Suga and once again knocking him down. Suga’s cry of surprise was cut off when the dog laid himself on top of the silver haired man, resting his head on the floor beside Suga’s. The dog was heavy, but it seemed like he was holding himself up, so as to not crush Suga. And he was wet, still, but unlike Suga, he was warm. So warm. 

Hesitantly, Suga pulled his arms to his own chest, pressing them into the dog’s underbelly. He felt the dog slowly swishing his tail side to side, thumping into Suga’s legs as he did. 

“This is awkward,” he whispered, but he didn’t push the dog away or tell him to get up. In fact, he turned his hands so he could clutch at the dog’s thick fur. The dog settled slightly, pushing closer to Suga but still not crushing him. He was warming him up, at least his front. Suga turned his face and pressed it into the dog’s neck. “Thank you.” 

After a minute, Suga could finally start to feel the tips of fingers. He gave a sigh into the dog's fur. “Maybe,” he whispered, “I should have at least taken off my shirt earlier. At this rate I'll be a popsicle until tomorrow.”

The dog pulled his head back and blinked down at Suga. He huffed into the silver haired man's face before leaning down and licking Suga’s face. 

Warmth gathered in his cheeks and slowly spread down his body. It was nothing perverted or embarrassing; simply like someone had given him a hot mug of tea for him to drink. Except he didn't have tea. 

Suga chuckled and hugged himself into the dog's neck. “Your affection is warming my cold heart.” He teased. “But I think, maybe, we should go start that fire. Yeah?”

The beast stood slowly, then backed up, allowing Suga to scramble up. He missed the heat the fur had given him, but he couldn't just lay there with a dog on him all night. 

He rubbed at his hair with a towel before grabbing at his phone. He cursed himself for forgetting to turn off the flashlight app; it had drained his battery. He sighed, then moved into the bedroom. The dog followed, limping heavily still, but not looking like he was going to fall over. It was a good sign. 

Suga dressed in another pair of sweats and a large sweatshirt that may or may not have belonged to Iwaizumi at one point. With just a little bit of clothing, he felt much better, and warm. He looked over his shoulder and smiled at the dog who was patiently waiting for him. 

“Okay. Food and fire. The essentials of life, right?”

The dog yawned.

“Yes, you and me both. But I haven't eaten all day.” 

Suga bundled the blankets from the bed into his arms and walked with purpose out to the main room. The dog followed, watching him with a tilt of his head. Suga dropped the blankets in front of the fireplace and laid them all out, making a bit of a nest. The dog came over and plopped down on them, thumping his tail as Suga bent over to try to start the fire.

He had never really done such a thing before and it took him minutes to actually get a log to catch fire and stay lit. He looked over his shoulder at the dog triumphantly.

“I did it!” 

The dog wagged his tail more, then flopped down on his good side, facing his belly to the fireplace. 

Suga smiled, proud of himself over such a simple task, then pushed himself up. He stretched, and as he did, his stomach growled at him, reminding him of his lack of a meal that day. He had never eaten his second ramen bowl. He walked to the kitchen, making a face at the mess he had left himself.

The dishes were still in the sink, and the bowl of scraps were still sitting on the counter. He got the pot out of the refrigerator, glad he had been in the process of just boiling everything. If the power had gone out while he had been sauteing, he would have had to start over. He put the rice on as well, using the rice cooker with too many buttons, then started to dig around for something to feed the dog.

He was at a loss with how to do with that. He had some chicken, but he had not bought any other meat, even though he could afford it. 

What did dogs eat? Were there things they couldn't eat? He remembered something vaguely about chocolate, probably to not give it to them.

Chicken and rice seemed like a safe bet until he could do actual research. 

Suga removed the chicken from the fridge and began to chop it into decent sized pieces. The dog would probably wouldn’t appreciate it if Suga fed him nearly ground up chicken. He threw it into a pan to brown, then turned back to his soup. It wasn’t nearly spicy enough, so he added two more peppers into it. 

The rice finished first, and as Suga pulled down some bowls from the cupboard, he paused to turn to the window. He narrowed his eyes at the rain falling outside, silently daring it to cut off his power again. 

The lights in the kitchen obediently stayed on. 

Suga placed the bowls onto the counter, and added rice to both. He checked the chicken, and satisfied it was cooked through, drained the fat, then spooned it on top of the rice. He looked down at the simple meal and frowned. Should he add like, salt and pepper? Did it matter? Dogs ate raw meat and stuff, would he care about bland chicken and rice? 

Suga grabbed the peppermill and added just a touch to the bowl. 

It certainly couldn’t hurt. 

In contrast, his soup was full of flavor and he inhaled the scents of the broth as he poured it. It tickled his nose and the carrots and potatoes had taken on a yellowish shine with the amount of curry powder he used. 

If the fire didn’t warm him back up, the soup very much would. 

Suga stuck two water bottles into the pockets of his sweatpants, took out a third bowl, then did an amazing balancing act to carry everything out into the living room without sloshing his soup around. 

The dog watched him with half interest, thumping his tail into the ground mildly. Suga set the bowls down onto the living room table, then fished the bottles out and placed them to the side. He sat on the cushion and rearranged everything how he liked it.

Then he set the chicken and rice on the floor. That got the dog’s attention. He hauled himself up and padded over to the table, wagging his tail as he did. Suga had to bite his lip to hold back a laugh; the dog could easily have eaten off the table. He placed the empty bowl by the bowl of food, then cracked open a water bottle and poured some into it. 

The dog leaned down and sniffed at the food, almost knocking over the bowl with his muzzle. 

“It’s for you.” Suga said, and as soon as he did, the dog began to eat, scarfing down everything. Suga beamed, glad that what he had chosen to make was acceptable. 

He pulled his own soup closer and picked up his spoon. His first bite had him moaning in appreciation. It burned in all the right ways and the heat spread throughout his body. Even his eyes watered a bit. 

It was perfect. 

He ate slowly, savoring each spoonful. Every bite had him feeling warmer, but also sleepier. He felt like he hadn't done much that day but his muscles were aching, urging him to lay down and rest. Preferably under many blankets and next to the fire.

Suga was brought out of his thoughts by something wet pressing into his arm. He blinked at the dog as he tried to gently push Suga’s arm out of the way to get to his soup. The man huffed and pulled the bowl closer to him.

“This isn't for you.”

The dog looked up, one ear cocked to the side, then pushed his head forward, sniffing loudly at the food. 

“You won't like it. It's spicy.” 

The dog pushed harder, actually rocking Suga. The silver haired man pouted. “Fine, I warned you. I'll give you a taste. Step back.”

The dog stepped back, giving Suga room, and wagged his tail, clearly happy about the idea of more food. Suga picked the bowl that has once contained chicken and rice up and carefully spooned some broth in. He placed it back on the floor.

The dog gave him a look at the meager amount he had been served, then bent down and lapped it up.

Almost instantly the dog scrambled back, snorting and shaking his head. Suga laughed.

“I told you it was too spicy for you!”

The dog glared at him, ears back before all but diving at the water bowl, eagerly drinking it up. He downed the entire thing, gave Suga a very unhappy look, then trodded back to the fireplace. Suga watched him carefully lay back down, curling up on the blankets. 

Suga finished his soup, perfectly content with its spiciness, then took up the dishes and brought them to the kitchen. He dropped them into the sink and decided, like the bad adult he was, to do them in the morning.

His body was warm and heavy and he very much wanted to lay down. 

He made sure to turn off all the lights as he returned to the main room, leaving only the fire as a source to see by. He grabbed the throw pillows off the couch, then joined the dog on the blankets.

The beast lifted his head, watching as Suga arranged himself. He gave a soft, almost questioning woof. Suga smiled at him.

“I want to be by the fire, too.” He explained, laying down. He pulled one of the blankets up around him, curling into the added warmth. Once he was settled, the dog crawled forward, pressing his back and shoulders against Suga’s legs and laying back down to sleep.

The silver haired man smiled to himself and closed his eyes.

“Goodnight, boy.”

He quickly drifted off to sleep, feeling warm, and oddly enough, completely safe.


	2. Cumin

Suga laid his head down on the table and stared out the window that faced the back lawn. The rain was still coming down in sheets; it seemed like it had not let up at all since the night before. There were distant rumblings of thunder, but nothing severe enough to shake the house. He sighed, and turned his eyes to his laptop. 

He had written a fair bit since that morning; sitting down and churning out words. He had even done an action scene that included a knife fight and dodging, and had felt accomplished, given how bad he was at such things. But now his mind felt sluggish, his main character was not doing what she was supposed to be doing, and Suga was not in the mood to fight with her. 

Maybe he'd feel more enthused if he stayed away and let his brain and fingers rest for a bit.

Pleased with his own idea, Suga stretched across the table before sitting back up. He started to get up, but was stopped by a weight in his lap. He blinked down at the dog, who had been using him as a pillow, and smiled.

He scratched at the beast’s neck, earning a happy thump of his tail. 

So far the dog seemed very content with him, spending most the day lounging in front of the fire, and only recently coming to lay on Suga. A night's rest seemed to have done wonders; the dog was barely limping.

He was friendlier than Suga expected for a dog wandering in the woods. The man remembered the shop attendant telling him dogs of the village sometimes got out and that must have been the case with this one. He was too affectionate to be a stray.

Whoever his family was must have been missing him.

When the rain let up, Suga planned to go into town and ask if anyone's dog had gotten out. But for now he planned to selfishly enjoy the dog's company. 

He had not realized how much he had missed someone cuddling up to him. It had been so long, or at least it felt like it. 

Suga closed his eyes tightly and forced the thoughts away. He had told himself he wouldn’t think about _that_ anymore, wouldn’t let the hurt wrap around his heart and squeeze until it felt like he couldn’t breathe. He beat the feelings down into submission and gave a forced smile down to the dog. 

“Do you know any tricks?” 

The beast opened an eye and twitched an ear at Suga. He looked up at the silver haired man for a long moment before standing up and scooting back. Suga crawled around the table so he could get a full body view of the dog. 

“Okay, um. How about the obvious? Sit?” The dog stared at him before sitting slowly. “Um, down?” Down he went, giving a little huff as he did. “Shake?” The dog shook his head and Suga laughed before holding out his hand. “No, like, shake?” The dog gave him a look, like why hadn’t Suga explained better, before sitting up and putting a large paw into his hand. 

“Okay, that is all I’ve got. I obviously did not think this through, I don’t know any dog commands. I’ve never had a pet before.” He hummed, then dropped the dog’s paw to scratch at his neck. The dog leaned into it. “Not that you are mine. You’re such a good boy, you must belong to someone. I’m just….watching over you for the time being. You probably have humans who love you and pet you and feed you better things than chicken. And have a proper name for you. I just keep calling you ‘Dog’ or ‘Boy’. I’m not very clever when it comes to naming things. I’d probably have named you, like Mochi or something.” 

The dog flattened his ears against his head and Suga laughed. “I won't call you Mochi. There is no use trying to come up with something, we'll get you back to your owner soon.” He tried to ignore the hints of sadness in his voice. “Plus, you are totally a Buttercup.”

The dog leapt at him, knocking Suga onto his back and he was assaulted with licks to the face and neck. Suga screeched with laughter, pushing at the beast on top of him. 

“Off! Off! No! Stop it!” 

The dog didn't relent, instead actually placing a large paw on Suga’s shoulder to hold him down. Suga gave up on even trying to fight back and accepted his fate. The licking died down after a moment, turning into the dog snuffling around Suga’s face. Then he laid down, resting his head on Suga’s chest. 

The silver haired man wrapped his arms around the dog's neck, hugging him while beginning to run his fingers through his fur.

“Silly boy,” Suga hummed as he smiled up at the ceiling. He felt the dog hit his tail against his leg and he chuckled. “Yeah, I had fun, too. That was a good...I feel better now.” He leaned up slightly and pressed a kiss to the dog's muzzle, earning a quirk of his ears. “Getting you back for all those kisses.”

The beast huffed in his face. Suga squeezed him. 

“I need to get back to writing. Would you like to help? I'll let you pick which room Amélie dies in.” The dog lifted his head, tilting it like he was thinking. “She's the one you didn't like. Who wanted to go into the field and not the tower.” Large ears flicked forward and the dog got off of Suga. The man laughed as he sat up and crawled to the table. “She didn't know what was waiting for them there just because I told you.” He waved a hand at the dog, who had huffed at him, and plopped in front of his laptop again. “She's a good character. Who is about to die a very gruesome and horrible death.”

Suga rubbed at his eyes once before hunching back over his laptop, bringing up the document that held the latest chapter. He read over the last paragraph he had written, then sighed heavily. He felt slightly more rejuvenated, a little sharper, but the words he read over were bringing him back down. He knew the words were decent but they weren’t good enough. He highlighted it, tempted to just delete it and start over again. 

Very suddenly, he had a lapful of dog; a massive head resting on his thighs and bright amber eyes looking up at him with what Suga could only describe as affection. He dropped his hand from the keyboard to gently scratch at the dog’s ear. 

“You think it’s good enough, don’t you?” 

The large, but always so gentle, beast panted up at him and Suga felt himself start to smile. “It’s what first drafts are for. We can fix it in editing.” 

Instead of deleting the paragraph, he added an annotation, telling himself to rework the words into something useable. 

It would bother him, in the back of his mind, that it wasn’t perfect the first time, but he also knew it meant he was growing as a writer. He had always hated the editing process; deleting and redoing the words he had worked so hard on. His pride had gotten in the way, and his writing had suffered for it. 

All his life, Suga had been creating stories in his head and sharing them with the world, through drawing and acting them out until he had learned to write. He had then scribbled down fantastical tales on anything he could get his little hands on. His parents had encouraged it; after all it had kept him inside the house. 

His mother had been a germaphobe, which had always made sense in Suga’s mind. Her brother had died because a simple cut on his finger had gotten infected. Playing with other children who were crawling with all kinds of grime was not something he had ever been allowed to do, and it had been fine with him. They had never wanted to just sit and listen to his stories. 

He had been six the first time his mother had dragged him to the hospital in the middle of the night. He didn't remember much of it, except the doctor telling his mother she was overreacting. 

It became a trend. Everytime he was sick, which Suga had to admit was more often than the average child, his mother's concerns were dismissed. Maybe if she had treated him as something fragile and weak, the doctors would have taken her more seriously, but she had refused to. She had told him he was a strong, smart boy; she had just wanted him to be clean and safe. There was just something wrong with, because he got sick so often and so severely. 

Suga had always thought of it as a double edged sword. He never really had friends and he spent half his childhood in bed, but he had found the world of online novels because of that. He had gotten lost there, reading everything that even sounded interesting, then tentatively posting his own things. 

The feedback had been good, especially considering his age. He mostly posted short stories, things for his own age group, but, slowly, he had gained his own following. People waiting to read his stories.

It had gone to his head. How couldn't it? He had been a teenager with people telling him he was great. 

Then everything changed. 

They had been on a trip to Tokyo when Suga had suddenly collapsed. They had rushed him to the hospital, and nothing has seemed to help the fever he had developed. He had been there days before they found out what was wrong.

His mother had been right all along. There had been something wrong with him. 

He had had a tumor on his spleen and the organ had not been able to function properly. His body couldn't fight off infection on its own. 

His luck was that the tumor had been benign, but it had gone undetected for so long that to remove it, they had to take part of his spleen. 

Suga remembered clearly, talking to the doctor before he went into surgery. The man had been explaining what was going to happen, then had commented, while Suga had smiled politely up to him, “You aren't scared of anything, are you?”

He had shrugged and replied, “What is scarier than your own body trying to kill you?” 

It had changed his philosophy on storytelling. He had always enjoyed horror, but after the surgery, he had become committed to it; to wanting to find something that scared him. 

He had written his first full length horror online novel while in recovery. His fans loved it.

He jumped around within the genre; monsters, serial killers, psychological, apocalyptic, ghosts, anything he could think of. But none of it got under his skin like his own body turning on him.

By the time he graduated high school, his first novel had made it to an online best seller list and he had been making a decent amount of money with short stories. He had even sold about two hundred physical copies of a collection of five page horror stories though one of those online self publishing sites. 

He had known what he had wanted to do with his life going into university. He had wanted to be able to go to a bookstore and hold something that had once been in his head in his hands and see his name on the cover. 

University had nearly crushed that dream. He had been so full of himself, so smug, that when a professor had torn apart one of his stories, Suga nearly cried. He had never truly been critiqued before. He had only ever gotten praise.

But class after class he had gotten told what he was doing wrong, what he needed to work on and change, and his ego had been knocked down about ten pegs. He had struggled to write anything, fretting about how imperfect it would be, obsessing over flaws. If it wasn't right the first time, how could it ever be? 

He had published nothing his second year of university. 

He had never felt so lost and unsure of himself. He was in a new world, realizing how truly sheltered he had been, both in terms of writing and interacting with people. He had never been without his mother and most of his school career had been in the form of tutors when he was too ill to leave the house.

Suga had been lucky he had lived across the hall from Oikawa Tooru. He had thought the other man was obnoxious at first, but somewhere along the way, they had become friends. Oikawa had caught him writing in a coffee shop one day, one thing had lead to another, and it had turned out the brunette was one of the two hundred or so people who actually owned his only physical work. 

Oikawa had helped him find his way through the horror of his second year, bringing him into social settings and showing him what to do without being condescending. He also had encouraged Suga to keep writing, to not give up on his dream. It had been hard, but he had managed. He had learned to not hate editing. He learned his words weren't perfect. He learned certain people didn't respect horror as a genre and were purposefully harder on it. 

And he had learned he would be okay. The world was not as dangerous as he had been led to believe from the confines of a hospital bed. He could go out and be with people and not have to be terrified of germs or getting sick. He could have new experiences that would ultimately improve his writing and make it more realistic, which had been a recurring critique from his professors. 

And he had learned what it was like to hold an envelope that contained the words ‘we would like to publish your work’ in his hands. 

But he hadn't learned that on his own. He had been too scared of rejection. It had been someone else who had sent the first pages out to editors, behind Suga’s back. It had been someone else who had made his dream come true. 

Someone who had made so many of his dreams come true. Someone who had always made things brighter. Someone who -

Suga didn't realize he was crying until the tears dripped from his cheeks onto his hands. At some point he had stopped typing, getting lost in memories. 

“Oh.” He whispered to himself.

He felt the dog move in his lap, then his face was being gently licked. Suga blinked at the dog, shocked to see how concerned the beast seemed to be. Suga gave him a weak smile.

“I'm fine. I just started thinking too much was all.” He scrubbed at his cheeks, trying to will away the tears. He glanced to his laptop and chuckled at the last thing he had written. He had been in the middle of describing a person trying to eat their own heart. A perfect place to start crying at. 

And strangely fitting. 

Suga closed the device and looked to the dog. “I think that is enough for today. Or at least now. My mind isn't feeling it.” He looked up to the ceiling with a frown. “Maybe I'm getting sick…”

The dog licked his cheek again, his breath surprisingly hot. It made Suga shiver. 

“Mmm, but what should we do?” He rubbed at the dog’s neck as he talked, “It is raining too much to go outside and I don’t have anything here for you to play with. I’m sorry for that, this must all be very dull for you.” The dog licked his cheek again and Suga couldn’t help but smile. 

“I am watching this strange series I found about a bunch of people that start off as kind of supernatural monster hunters and get mixed up in trying to save the world. It’s got a little bit of everything, with drama, and romance, and cross dressing. Tooru refuses to watch it with me because Hajime says the psychic acts just like him. I agree.” He dropped his voice then leaned forward, like he was telling a secret. “I keep watching for the hot guy who works at the bookstore.” Suga gave a goofy grin to the dog, who had started to wag his tail. “Let’s watch that, yeah?” 

The dog pulled away from him, then padded over towards the blankets still in front of the fire and laid down. Suga grabbed his laptop and followed. He thought for a moment about how to lay, then set the laptop down and laid on his side, resting his head on the dog’s shoulder. “Is this okay?” He asked. 

He just wanted to feel close to a warm body, pretend that maybe - 

The dog shifted, curling around Suga’s body. He closed his eyes and smiled. It felt different from what he was used to; the fur was tickling him through his shirt and the rise and fall of the dog’s chest was stronger than what he expected, but all of it was nice. And the dog didn’t seem to mind being used as a pillow. 

Suga opened his laptop again, bypassing his open documents to bring up his streaming service. He started up the episode he had left off on, then settled into the beast he was lying on, his hand coming up to curl into the thick fur by his face. 

He couldn't help but comment on everything; the plot, dialogue, acting, the CGI, and even the wardrobe choices. He kept expecting someone to tell him to shut up or yell him to rewind a few minutes because he had been rambling. He knew dogs couldn't talk, but it was always what happened when he watched things with people. 

He was taken by surprise when a low ‘boof’ suddenly echoed through his pillow and down his body. Suga tilted his head and smiled at the way the dog was intensely watching the screen. Like he was invested in the show as much as Suga was. The dog gave another quiet bark and Suga nodded into his fur as he looked back to the laptop.

“I agree.”

The dog tilted his head, giving Suga a curious look.

“I mean, how could he not notice all the magical things going on around him?”

The dog flattened an ear and boofed again into Suga’s face. 

They both turned their attention back to the screen, and Suga easily got caught up in the show. He had taken his time actually starting the show when he had first found it, put off by its length, but once he had started it, he actually very much enjoyed it. 

When he allowed himself time to actually watch.

After a few episodes, he felt his eyes grow heavy. He didn't resist it when he began to drift, but he was jolted back awake by a lick to the face. Suga glared at the dog, who gave him a grin, tongue hanging out. Suga huffed at him, but smiled all the same. 

He found himself selfishly hoping the storm outside lasted a few more days. He didn't want to give up the dog to his family yet. The cabin would be so lonely without him. Suga didn't know how he'd handle suddenly being alone again. The simple presence had become so comforting, just someone being there, who he could talk to. Someone he could cuddle up against. He hadn't even realized how much he had missed that. 

Suga curled his fingers tighter into the dog’s fur. He was always so selfish, wanting things that didn't belong to him.

The dog had a family, he couldn't stay with Suga, even if he seemed happy here. 

Even if the rain kept pouring Suga would go out the next day and ask around the town; try to reunite dog and family. 

He sighed then closed his eyes again. The dog didn't bother him again, allowing him to rest until he forced himself up and trudged into the bedroom to sleep.

+++

The rain was freezing and Suga was glad he had worn three layers under his jacket. At least his torso was warm while the rest of him turned into some sort of popsicle. 

How could the rain even be so cold without turning into snow? It didn't make sense to him. 

Suga trudged down the main road of the town near the cabin he was staying at, a frown on his face. He felt like all of his effort for coming down the mountain and pushing his loaned bike through the mud would all be for naught. Almost every single person he had spoken to had not recognized the dog he had found in the woods. There has been two people, an older couple shuffling along in the rain like it hadn't bothered him, had stared at the picture on Suga’s phone for nearly a minute before declaring the dog looked familiar but they couldn't remember from where.

It was the only thing still pushing him forward, stopping strangers on the streets to ask if they had heard anything about a missing dog.

There were no posters anywhere, on the streets or in the post office. It was confusing to the silver haired man. 

The dog was friendly, intelligent, and good mannered when he wasn't trying to steal food off Suga’s plate. His interactions with the canine world were admittedly limited but Suga really would have guessed that the dog seemed like the ideal pet. What more could people want from a dog?

Well, maybe something a tad bit smaller, but then he wouldn't be a good of pillow.

There was no way the dog could be a stray. He had to have a family somewhere, people who were missing him.

Suga would miss him very much if he was his dog.

Suga would miss him, anyways. He had very stupidly become attached to the beast. He hadn't meant to, but over their short day together it had occurred. 

But then again, Suga clearly wasn't the best at not becoming smitten with things he couldn't keep. 

He heaved a sigh and reached up to pull his beanie down over his ears. He had work to do, his mind could have a pity party later. 

Maybe in a bath after consuming a fair bit of alcohol so he couldn't remember it. 

The sight of an tiny old woman walking a tiny fat sausage of a dog dragged Suga from his thoughts. He watched in wonder for a moment, fascinated by the tiny creature's bright yellow rain coat and matching hat. He almost let them pass by completely, too caught up in the waddling and wondering if the dog he found would stay in a raincoat long enough for a picture.

He doubted it. 

Suga had barely gotten a photo of him good enough to show people, and it was still blurry. The dog ended up looking like it was glowing.

He hurried towards the old woman and her wiener dog. “Ah, excuse me, ma’am.” He came to a stop when she turned to face him and he gave a low bow. “I'm sorry to interrupt your walk, but I have a quick question.”

“Yes, dear?” She asked, giving a polite smile. Suga bowed again and fished his phone from his pocket. As he brought up the picture of the beast at the cabin, the little fat dog in front of him began to sniff at his leg. It then gave a sort of high keening whine, then backed away from Suga, hiding behind its owner and lowering itself to the ground.

Suga blinked down at the dog but the old woman waved her hand. “Don't mind her. What is your question?”

“I found a dog in the woods, I was wondering if you knew who he might belong to. I am trying to find his family.”

The old woman took the phone and squinted her eyes to look at the picture. Her lips pursed. “Where did you say you found him?”

“In the woods, I'm renting the cabin up up the mountain and he showed up there. He was hurt.” Suga said, feeling himself frown. “He's a very good dog, I'm sure his family is missing him, but no one recognizes him.” 

The woman’s flicked up to him a moment before looking back to the screen. He couldn't read her expression. “You cared for him?” Suga nodded, unable to help biting at his lip. She seemed to be studying the picture, memorizing it.

“Do you...know him?” Suga asked hesitantly. He didn't know which answer he wanted.

She hummed, then held the phone back out to Suga. He quickly took it and held it to his chest.

“I do.”

His heart began to pound in his chest. He'd done it. He'd found a clue to the dog's family. Why did he feel so sad?

“I have not seen him for many years. I thought he had been lost to the forest.” The old lady said a little smile coming to her lips. 

“Ah...what?” Suga asked, more than confused. The dog had been missing for years? And she recognized him still? “Years?”

The woman nodded, “He belongs to the forest.” 

“Belongs to….so he is a stray?” Suga asked, trying to understand. The woman was not making any sense. 

She laughed, amused by his words, and reached out and pat Suga on the arm. “Take good care of him.” She said before starting to walk again, her little sausage dog hurrying after her with its tail between its legs.

Suga stared at her, tempted to call out, ask more questions, but he was still completely lost by her words. Perhaps she was senile. Dogs couldn't survive on the woods for years and still be so friendly, could they?

Of course not. That's why street dogs were a problem back in his home town, they could be quite feral. Not snugly and playful like the dog he found. 

He couldn't be a stray. 

Suga refused to believe such a kind creature didn't have a family who loved him. 

Suga scrubbed at his face, wiping away the rain that still clung to his skin. He wouldn't give up, despite being cold and wet. He turned and kept walking down the main road, going up to each person he came across and asking the same questions. 

He kept receiving the same answers.

No one else recognized the dog or had any idea who he might have belonged to. 

The best answer he got was to try going to the next town over, which was a forty minutes drive away. 

Suga found himself at what a loss to do and made his way to the supermarket. If he was going to be keeping the dog for another night, he would need more chicken. 

The beast had a very healthy appetite. 

“Writer-san!” 

Suga’s head jerked up and he blinked at the woman behind the counter before giving her a smile. He quickly made his way over. 

“Ah, Abe-san, how are you?” 

“I am well, thank you. I did not expect to see you out so soon, it is still raining fairly heavily.” She eyed the way his scarf was dripping down onto his jacket for emphasis. He felt his cheeks redden.

“Ah. Well. I was looking for something.”

“Oh,” Abe brightened up and leaned over the counter a bit. “Perhaps I can help?” Suga nodded, wondering mildly why he hadn’t come to the supermarket in the first place, then brought up the picture of the dog and showed it to her. 

“I found this dog by the cabin. He was hurt and I was hoping to find his owner, but no one recognizes him.” Suga explained, for what felt like the millionth time.

The woman picked up the phone to take a closer look, her eyes widening slightly as she did. There was a flash of what looked to be fear across her face before she was giving Suga a slightly strained, but polite, smile. 

“Is it wise to be taking in strange injured dogs, Writer-san? Such creatures can be very dangerous, especially if they come from the forest.” 

Suga shrugged, “He is very kind. He did not even snap at me when I was taking care of the wound, and I’m sure it hurt him. He’s very big, but he’s gentle. That’s why I am sure he must have a family somewhere.” 

Abe slid the phone back across the counter to Suga, shaking her head. “I know almost all the dogs from here, my brother works in the animal clinic. That creature is not from our town.”

Suga looked down at his phone, taking in the glowing image of the dog. Everyone was telling him the same thing; the dog didn’t have a family here. No one in town was looking for him. The next town over was even further from the mountains, could the dog really have travelled all that way to the cabin? Suga was sure he could, but. Well.

Suga had tried, hadn’t he? He had come out and done his best, asking everyone he had seen about the loving beast he had tended to. He had done his part, would it really be so bad to just keep the dog? He really enjoyed the creature’s company and the dog seemed to feel the same. Suga had never had a pet before, his mother’s phobia of germs keeping him from ever even asking but, he didn’t live with his family anymore. Back home, he had his own apartment, and other occupants of the same building had pets. It would be a little tight.

But he wouldn’t be so lonely. 

Had he been lonely? He didn’t know. Maybe. 

He missed being around someone all the time. 

And it wasn’t like he could send the dog back into the woods with a good conscience, or bring him to some shelter and hoped someone else took him in.

No, Suga wanted to keep him. If the dog would have him. 

Suga nodded to himself, a small smile coming to his lips. He’d keep the dog. He’d have a new friend. 

A giddiness was spreading throughout him and he almost started laughing. He kept his lips clamped shut, though, mostly because Abe was giving him a concerned look. 

“Are you alright, Writer-san?”

Suga nodded, then gave a sheepish smile, “Ah, Abe-san. Do you carry any pet supplies?”

+++

Suga regretted not accepting Abe’s offer to have her son drive him back up to the cabin. The rain had calmed to a cold slushy drizzle and he had really thought he would be okay. He had made it up the road once without dying and he could do it again. Hopefully. 

He looked over his shoulder and glared at the full basket on the back of the bike. 

He may have gone a little bit over board. 

He had been excited and, really he had no idea what a dog needed, so he had bought one of almost everything. He didn’t buy any of the canned or dried dog food, and the collars looked like they wouldn’t fit around the dog’s neck if he combined three of them together, but he had gotten toys, a brush, bowls, and treats. He had had Abe help him find food that dogs could actually eat and had bought enough to last a few days.

The only thing in the basket for Suga were a chocolate bar Abe had forced onto him and a water bottle that he could down after pedaling his way up the side of the mountain. 

If he ever made it. 

The further up he got, the less taken care of the road was. It was becoming muddy and pot holes were starting to become increasingly common. He had already hit three. 

He was worried he might pop the front tire if he hit another one. 

As his legs struggled to force the through a puddle, Suga made a decision. He slowed the bike to a stop and dismounted. He would push the thing the rest of the way. He was mostly to the cabin, so if he was lucky, he would make it back before the sun began to set. 

Determined, he grabbed the handles and began to push. It was easier than he thought it would be, but his feet slipped and slid on the mix of asphalt and mud. It was easier, but it would be just as exhausting in the long run. 

Next time he went out to the middle of nowhere to finish a novel he was renting a car as well. He’d have to get his license first, but then he would definitely be renting a car. 

As Suga walked he debated fishing his phone out and turning on some music. It would help to distract him from exactly how long it was taking him to walk just a short distance. The fantastical part of his brain pointed out if he did that, he’d be advertising his location to any danger out in the woods; the serial killers lurking behind the trees waiting to prey on unsuspecting travellers or the demons the locals were so scared of. The logical part of him told him the area was void of any natural predators that would try to eat him. The region had not reported a bear sighting in almost thirty years. 

Something moving up the road caught Suga’s eyes and he slowed his pace until he could identify it. It was oddly shapen, with an almost round top and thin, long bottom. It reminded him of an umbrella, and as Suga squinted his eyes more, he realized that was exactly what it was.

It was someone holding an umbrella and walking along the side of the road. Suga started moving again, forcing his protesting legs into a jog. 

Who the hell would be up in the woods besides him? Everything he had learned from the townspeople told him that not only were they scared of the forest, but that there was nothing up the mountain path beyond the cabin he was staying at. 

Was someone trying to visit him? That didn’t make much sense, of the people he actually knew, only Kiyoko knew exactly where he was. He had been very carefully about not tell anyone where he was going to the point he hadn’t even known until he got onto the train, less he let it slip. 

Perhaps it was someone from the town, having heard Suga had found a dog? He really hoped that was not the truth. It ached his heart to even think it. 

When Suga could clearly see the person on the road, he stopped in his tracks so quickly he almost tripped over his feet. 

It was a child. A child in a black military style school uniform holding a large paper umbrella that sat almost right on top of his head. Despite how severe the rain had been only an hour before, all of the paper was perfectly intact. 

The boy stopped and turned to look at Suga and he felt himself sucking in a breath. The kid had a large gauze patch over his left eye, while his right was almost golden in color, matching a streak of bleach in his bangs. 

“Are you lost?” Suga asked, cautiously taking a step forward. He didn’t want to scare the boy off. The child blinked his golden eye at Suga then canted his head to the side at an almost unnatural angle. A shiver run up Suga’s spine at the way the kid’s neck looked broken. 

The rain suddenly began to fall harder again, pouring down in freezing sheets. Suga yelped and yanked his jacket closer to his body, almost knocking over the bike as he did. He scrambled to keep it upright. 

The boy seemed unaffected by the sudden onslaught, his paper umbrella standing firm against the rain. 

Suga pushed himself and the bike closer to the child and he was relieved when the boy just watched him. 

“Are you lost?” He repeated. 

The boy didn’t answer, just blinked slowly up at Suga. 

Maybe he was scared. 

Suga tried another tactic. 

“Are you hungry?”

The boy’s head slowly, almost creepily so, turned back up right. His tongue darted out and licked at pale lips. Suga took that as a yes. 

Suga turned to dig into the basket on the bike, pushing past squeaky toys and bags of rice until he found the chocolate bar Abe had given him. When he looked back to show the boy the treat, he yelped again and jumped in surprise. The boy, who had been a few meters away only seconds ago, was nearly on top of him, the rim of his umbrella brushing on Suga’s jacket. 

Suga placed his hand over his heart, trying to get it to calm down. “Ah, you are really quiet, you know?” He gave a shaky smile, then ripped at the packaging of the chocolate before handing it out to the boy. 

The boy looked at the candy a moment before taking it. Suga bit his own lip at the glimpse he got of the boy’s fingers; they were pale and he could see the blue veins standing out against them. How long had the boy been in the rain? If he didn’t already have hypothermia, he was surely going to catch it. 

Suga kicked out the stand of the bike and made sure it was steady before letting go out it. Then he knelt down so he was almost eye level with the boy. “Here,” He said softly as he unwrapped the scarf from around his neck. Once free, he looped it over the boy’s shoulders. The child watched him without word, still holding the umbrella in one hand and the chocolate in the other. 

Suga then unzipped his jacket, once again glad he had worn so many layers, and draped it over the boy’s frame. “It’s not much, but it should keep you a bit drier, yeah? I’m staying a bit up the road. Come with me and we’ll get you dry and warm and we can call your parents to come get you.”

The boy said nothing still, but the hand holding the chocolate slowly moved up to his chest and the tips of his fingers ran over the fabric of Suga’s scarf. Suga smiled. 

“I know the pattern is a bit tacky,” and it was, it was pale yellow and pink and had stylized frogs all over it, “but it is waterproof.” 

The boy looked up to Suga, his one eye studying Suga’s face before his hand moved from the scarf to Suga’s face. His fingers were freezing, the poor thing, as he pushed into the flesh of Suga’s cheek. His nails were sharp, scratching the skin and he felt blood welling up, but Suga didn’t push him away. It didn’t really hurt and Suga was grateful the boy was responding in some way. 

The boy’s lips parted, just as slowly as he had done everything else but move towards Suga, until his mouth was fully open. 

Suga waited patiently for him to say something, offering what he hoped was a kind smile. 

A crow’s caw sounded out from somewhere behind them, loud enough to shake the air. The boy jerked back from Suga, dropping the candy bar as he did, and his lips clamped shut. His little face scrunched up and he glared at something over Suga’s shoulder. Suga turned to see what it was. 

A crow, as big as the one that had lead him to the dog, had perched itself on the handlebars of Suga’s bike. It flapped its wings at them and cawed again. 

“Bird-san?” Suga asked, wondering if it was the same bird, or perhaps its rowdy friend. The bird spread its wings, showing off how large it was, and cried out again. Suga stuck his tongue out at the bird, then started to turn back to the child, “It’s okay, I think he’s a ...where did you go?” 

The child was gone. 

Suga jumped to his feet and spun around, looking for where the boy had run off to. There was no sign of him anywhere; not even footprints in the mud. Suga bit his lip in worry. The boy shouldn’t be out in the rain alone, it was dangerous and he hadn’t looked like he could weather anymore of the freezing rain. Suga started walking towards the tree line opposite the bike and the crow cawed again, sounding closer. 

The silver haired man turned and blinked down at the bird. “You scared him off, Bird-san.” He accused. The crow snapped its beak at Suga, then hopped close to him until it could extend its wings and smack at his legs. Which it did. 

“Hey, stop that! I didn’t do anything! Stop!” 

The crow kept hitting at him, getting rougher when Suga stepped away towards the woods. He tried to circle around the creature, going instead towards the bike and the crow didn’t follow. It just flapped at him threateningly and cawed. 

“Fine, fine, I get it!” Suga barked, actually not understanding at all what the bird’s problem was. He went to the bike and kicked it off of its stand, then began to push it up the road. As he did, he fished his phone from his pocket, squinting as he tried to see through the rain at the screen. 

His top layer had completely soaked through and he was starting to shake now. He would be taking that bath when he got back to the cabin, regardless if he had booze or not. 

But at least the kid would be dry. 

Suga found the contact he wanted and pressed the call button. He nearly dropped his phone when he brought it to his ear; loud static was coming through. He cursed, ended the call, and shoved the device back into his pocket. The storm and the fact he was in the middle of nowhere meant he probably had no reception. 

Thunder roared low in the distance and Suga swore. He urged his body to move faster, despite the chill setting into his bones. He couldn’t be that far away from the cabin. 

A caw came from above him and Suga tilted his head up just enough to see the crow circling above him. Suga frowned up at it. 

“That is not at all ominous!” He yelled up at the bird. He got another caw in return. 

The rain, at least, seemed to be calming down again. A short burst before the rest of the storm that thunder had promised got to the mountains. 

Suga managed to keep up his jog until the road splintered; the main way continuing up the mountain while the other branched off into the driveway for the cabin. He slowed to a walk until the cabin came into view. 

Another crow was sitting on the railings to the cabin’s porch, and Suga had the feeling it was the less aggressive one, and much to Suga’s surprise, the dog was waiting for him on the steps. 

Suga had been sure he had locked the door when he had left. 

All the emotion he had felt back in town, in the supermarket when picking out things off the shelf, came back to Suga full force. That was his dog. 

He broke into a grin then rushed forward, pushing the bike along. The dog stood up from where he had been laying down and leapt from the stairs, running towards Suga with as much excitement as the man was giving off. 

Suga let go of the bike, not caring as it fell, and slid to a stop. He was in the process of dropping to the knees when the beast bawled him over, knocking him flat onto his back and assaulting his face with licks. 

Suga laughed, ignoring the pain in his back for now, and reached up to scratch at the dog’s neck. “Good boy!” He cried out, earning more kisses. “Good boy! Such a good - ack! Not in the mouth!” He pushed the dog’s muzzle to the side, so the dog could not stick his tongue down Suga’s throat. The dog happily went about licking at his cheek and Suga found himself leaning up into it. 

The dog paused very suddenly, then began to snuffle at Suga’s cheek, pressing his nose right into it. It stung, and Suga remembered the cut the little boy had given him. 

The dog growled, low in its throat, but the noise didn’t frighten Suga. He knew the beast was asking what had happened. He rubbed at the dog’s fur, but before he could open his mouth to speak, the crow that had been circling above him landed to his right and cawed at the dog. 

The beast looked up, ears cocking forward before gruffing lowly at the bird. It hopped in place before giving an answering cry. Suga watched the exchange, fingers still curled into the dog's fur. 

The beast raised its hackles, showing the fangs longer than Suga’s fingers, and for a moment, the man thought the crow was in danger. But then the dog was looking down at him again and nuzzling at Suga’s cheek. Hot breath hit his cold skin, cascading down him and warming his insides.

Suga wrapped his arms around the dog's neck, hugging him loosely.

“As enjoyable as this is, I'm getting mud up the back of my pants. Let's go inside. I've got something to tell you.” 

The dog stepped away, allowing Suga to sit up. He gagged at the feeling of guck sliding against his skin; it was probably all in his hair and staining his clothes. 

That bath was becoming more and more needed.

Suga was glad he had wrapped everything so thoroughly before putting it into the bike’s basket. At least the toys and food were safe from the mud and rain. 

He didn't realize how tired he had become until he was pushing the bike up the stairs. The dog gently pressed his head into the back of Suga’s back, helping him along until he could park the bike. 

The dog tilted his head as Suga unloaded the basket, “Yes, it's all for you. But after we get inside. And after a bath and a talk.”

The beast laid his ears back, but followed as Suga made his way into the cabin. The door was still locked, exactly how he had left it.

Perhaps he had gotten out the back way. 

As much as Suga wanted to go straight to the bath, he needed to put the food into the refrigerator. He knew, as he walked through the house with the dog following him all the while, he'd have to go back and scrub everywhere he had taken a step. He was careful in handling the food, not daring to even take them out of the bags they were wrapped in until his hands were perfectly clean. 

The dog bumped his head into Suga’s thigh as he was putting the last package of chicken into the refrigerator. Suga shut the door, then turned to kneel in front of the beast, reaching out and running his hands along the dog’s neck. He leaned in as he did and pressed their foreheads together. The dog wagged his tail. 

“Hey, boy…” He felt himself smile, something soft and loving. He really had grown so attached to the dog in such a short amount of time. It would have broken his heart to have to give him up. He prayed the dog would want to stay with him; he wouldn’t want to keep it locked up and confined if the beast truly wanted to be free and run around the woods. As much as Suga wanted him to stay. 

“You want to come take a bath with me?” He asked and the dog grunted in response, not sounding pleased at all with the idea. Suga laughed. “Okay, rephrase. Want to come sit with me while I take a bath? We’ve got a few things to talk about.” 

The dog pulled back and licked at Suga’s nose before turning and starting to pad off towards the bedroom. Suga pushed himself back into standing and followed. As he entered the room, he began to shed his layers, making a face when he saw that yes, the back of his clothes were completely covered in mud. How lovely that would be to wash later. Even his briefs had managed to get grime on the waistband. 

He dropped all of it into the laundry basket, vowing to use a little more detergent than needed just to make sure everything was clean, then moved into the en suite where the dog was waiting for him. The beast thumped his tail, which Suga had learned meant he was happy, as Suga made sure he had enough towels.

Setting everything he would need on the counter, Suga stepped into the shower and started it up. He hissed at how intense the water pressure was, he had still not gotten used to it. His shower back at home was gentle on him; this felt like it was trying to beat the dirt from him skin. 

He started with his hair, working a lather into it. He had been right, earlier, there were clumps of mud caked into his silver locks. He made a face at the way the water was turning brown as it ran off his body and down the floor drain. 

How disgusting.

Once he had thoroughly washed his hair, scrubbing it twice more with shampoo just to make sure there was nothing in it, he carefully worked the lather down his body. He leaned over on the stool to grab the back brush he had gotten from the linen closet and rubbed hard at his back, until he was sure it was red and raw. 

Maybe it was something he picked up from his mother or maybe it was just being a decent human, but he absolutely hated feeling gross and slimy. He didn't want to chance bringing an iota of mud with him back out of the bathroom. 

Suga used the same tactic on his front, but with a loofa. He bit at his lip as he scrubbed at his chest; the spaces in loofa were catching on his nipples and with how harshly he was scrubbing, they were being tugged on. 

It felt good. 

He felt heat gather in his cheeks. It was embarrassing; that part of his body had always been so sensitive. The rest of him had become indifferent to pokes and tugs and pinches, the results of years worth of medical testing, but one brush of his nipples had his body shivering. 

He dropped his hand from his chest to his stomach, eyes closing at the puckering of skin under his sternum that represented his scar. It had faded, over the decade since he had gotten it, but it was still prominent enough to make him shy away from situations that required him to remove his shirt. The questioning stares made him uneasy.

Perhaps that was why he had gotten a tattoo; to distract people’s eyes. 

Suga’s fingers moved from his middle to his left side and he cracked open his eyes to look down through his lashes. 

He couldn't see it very well from the angle he was looking down at and it was obscured by suds, but it didn't matter because Suga had every detail of it memorized. A branch starting under his ribs, with four blooms of nightshade on it, the last of which was on his thigh and had its petals starting to fall away. Behind the bottom flower, and extending out, a stack of three weathered books, on top of which was a pair of circular glasses with cracked lenses. Each of the books had a title, in different faded script; ‘Time Enough At Last,’ ‘Run, Run, Lost Boy,’ and ‘They're Coming To Get You, Barbara,’ in descending order. All of the tattoo was in grayscale and Suga loved it with all of his heart. 

He could go on for hours about the symbolism and meaning behind each splash of ink on his skin, but the reality of it was he had not thought of any of it at the time. The entire tattoo had been a spontaneous event, brought on by Oikawa dragging him past a parlor and Suga stopping to look at the macabre things in the window. The brunette had said he would get a tattoo if Suga would, and well, it had been an experience Suga had anyways wanted. 

He hadn't planned to get something so big, but after describing what he liked, the artist had drawn him up a piece he couldn't say no to. 

Suga smiled at the memory; it was one of his favorite times in university. He had changed a lot during that time, for the better, with lots of thanks to Oikawa.

He ran his fingers over the falling petals, then continued on scrubbing at his skin until he was satisfied that he was completely free of mud. He rinsed himself once for good measure, then turned off the water and pushed the shower supplies into the corner of the room.

When he turned to face the tub, he was surprised to see the dog laying on the bath mat still, head on his paws, and watching Suga with large amber eyes. He wagged his tail when he saw Suga looking at him.

“Ah,” Suga rubbed at the back of his neck. He had honestly forgotten the beast had been there, waiting for him to finish. He had taken his time, being thorough. He wondered if the dog had watched him explore his torso. He hoped not, the idea made his cheeks flush horribly.

Suga cleared his throat and stepped into the bath, sitting down in the tub before starting the water. He turned the knob until it was almost scalding, then sat back, waiting for it to fill. 

The dog stood and moved forward so he could rest his muzzle on the side of the tub and Suga reached out to scratch at the beast’s ears. “Hey, boy.” He said softly, “lots to tell you about today. Sorry it took so long to get to it. Such a good boy, waiting for me.”

The dog leaned in and licked at his face encouragingly. Suga chuckled and turned slightly in the tub to face him.

“I told you I was going down to ask if anyone knew who your family was.” Suga started, a small frown coming to his lips, “No one knew anything at all. The closest thing I got was you were from the forest. A stray, without a family to call your own.” He curled his fingers into the dog's fur. “Is it true?”

The dog blinked slowly at him before sighing through his nose, then he nuzzled at Suga’s cheek. The answer was clear.

“I wished it wasn't.” He whispered.

He was quiet for a few moments, listening to the water fill the tub. Emotions swirled in his stomach, guilt flaring up at his words. He was glad the dog didn't have a family. It was selfish and wrong, but it was the truth. 

“No, that is a lie. If you had a family, you wouldn't be here with me. I never would have found you, and we wouldn't bet here now, like this. I like this.” Suga licked at his lips, preparing himself for the words he had been waiting to say.

“I want you to stay with me.”

The dog lifted his head, ears turning to face forward. He stared at Suga, amber eyes steady on his face, before slowly placing his front paws on the side of the tub. 

“Please stay.”

The dog leapt into the tub, sending water over the edges and spilling into the floor. Suga shrieked in surprise as suddenly the beast was standing over him, licking at Suga everywhere he could reach, his large tail flying back and forth so fast it was slamming into the wall and spraying the water coming from the faucet everywhere. 

“No, bad, I've just gotten clean!”

Suga tried to escape from the onslaught by sliding down further into the water. It didn't help at all; the dog seemed intent on giving him kisses and letting his answer be known through that. It made Suga’s heart swell with joy; the dog wanted to stay with him. 

He didn't want to leave. 

Suga was good enough.

The lingering doubt, a ball of tension in his chest Suga hadn't even known had formed burst and relief began to flood through him.

His shrieking turned into laughter as the kisses died into gentle snuffles against his cheeks. He reached up and ran his hands along the dog’s body, smiling as he did.

“You know,” Suga said suddenly as he realized something for the first time, something he should have thought of a while ago if he was honest with himself, “if you are going to stay with me, you need a proper name.” 

The dog stopped showering Suga with affection and pulled back his head to blink down at the man, ears angled back in thought. Suga took the chance to stretch his leg up and turn the faucet off. 

“So,” Suga started, forcing the wicked smile that wanted to come to his lips to stay away. “What would you like for dinner, Buttercup?”

The dog snorted in his face, then climbed out of the tub, sloshing water everywhere. Suga pushed himself back up into sitting, cackling as he did. The dog glared at him before shaking all the water from his fur and getting it over the rest of the bathroom. It just made Suga laugh even more, his entire body shaking with it. 

When he managed to gain some semblance of composure, though he was still grinning with mirth, he looked down at what remained of his bath. The water barely covered his legs and there was a thick layer of dog hair floating on the surface, sticking to everything.

It was the best bath he had ever had.

Suga shook his head, then crossed his arms on the side of the tub, watching as the dog started to scratch at his ear with his back paw. The silver haired man smiled more, his cheeks starting to hurt from it. 

He reached out his hand, brushing his fingers along the dog's side to make sure the gauze wrapped around him hadn't become soaked. He chuckled when the beast looked over to him. 

“Silly boy,” Suga said affectionately. The dog nipped at his fingers, not at all hurting him but just touching him back in some way. “Let's go start some food, shall we? I think this bath has become a bit moot, with you slobbering all over me.” 

He popped the drain for the bathtub, then pushed himself up into standing. Dog hair clung to his calves and feet and Suga gave an accusing glare to the beast on front of him. The dog wagged his tail innocently, tongue hanging out of his mouth as he grinned up to the man. Suga shook his head, then the dog trotted out of the en suite, tail high in the air.

Using a washcloth from the counter, Suga wiped the wet fur off of his legs, his smile dropping to something more content. 

He remembered how he had felt the night before; the dread of losing his new friend. It was the complete opposite of how he felt at the moment. His chest was so light. He was so happy, just thinking that he could lay with the dog and watch shows every night while winding down from a day of writing. It would be so nice, just to have someone there with him. 

Even if it was just a dog. 

An amazing dog who Suga couldn't just keep referring to as Dog in his mind. 

He stepped out of the bath and grabbed a towel to start drying himself off.

Suga had been honest when he had said he was wretched at coming up with names. More often than not, he used the first thing that popped into his head, after a quick Google search to make sure it wasn't already in use. 

But dogs weren't people, he'd be stuck with the name and Suga couldn't change it in editing later. 

How did people name their pets? He really had no idea. Were they supposed to be descriptive of the animal? Human names weren't descriptive and it seemed so strange to him to do the same thing to another creature. 

He changed tactic and thought instead about things he liked. Suga liked things on the darker side, macabre, occult, and weird. 

Poe would be a good name, Suga thought. Little light spirits and the author of some of Suga’s favorite stories. 

But also the name of that guy from Star Wars that Oikawa loved so much. That instantly killed any appeal the name had. 

Sterling would have been great, but Suga had trouble pronouncing it. 

Names and ideas crossed his mind as he went into the bedroom and got dressed into something warm and dry. Everything he thought of there was something wrong with it; nothing felt right. Nothing felt like it suited the beast.

The idea hit him as Suga was pulling on his sweatshirt; a side character from the first online novel Suga had fallen in love with to the point he had printed out the entire thing and had it bound. The character was strong, reliable, and made Suga laugh out loud multiple times. He was also a Reaper of Death and his name has been a pun. It was perfect. 

Suga left bedroom and went out to the main room, smiling at the way the dog had laid out in front of the fireplace. He snatched up his phone off the table, then sat himself beside the beast. He stretched, then laid on his back and patted at his chest. The dog cocked his ears, then rolled until he could lay his head where Suga was patting. 

The silver haired man titled his own head back, then held the phone up and out, so most of his and the dog's bodies were in the shot. Once the angle was right, he snapped the picture. 

No matter what filter he used, the dog looked like he was eerily glowing, so Suga chose the one that gave him a similar effect. 

He typed up a caption, then turned the phone to show it to the dog. “What do you think?” Suga asked. “Of all of it.”

The dog’s ear twitched and he tilted his head as he examined the screen. Then he leaned up and licked Suga’s cheek while thumping his tail again the man's leg.

“Yeah?” 

He hit the post button and looked over the caption, his smile bigger than ever.

‘Time for Dai and I to settle down and binge watch our new favorite show. Hope everyone is having a good of a night as we are!’


	3. Coriander

His fingers moved continuously over the keyboard, the words he had been previously struggling to write now flowing seamlessly from him. Perhaps it had been the change in weather that had pleased his muses and they had blessed his brain with creative juices, or maybe it had been his own shift in emotions that had gotten him over the hurdle, but either way, Suga was glad to have been writing so smoothly. 

He had woken up at the crack of dawn, surprised to hear the chirping of birds outside of the window instead of the steady rainfall that had been plaguing the mountains for days.The early morning rays had shined in through the curtains and Suga had decided to make the most of the opportunity that had been presented to him. 

He had spent all morning out on the balcony, drinking coffee and working on the final chapters of his novel. He was almost done, an end was actually in sight and it was exciting and terrifying at the same time. He just needed maybe two more pushes, two more bursts of writing, and he could finally start doing what he had come to the cabin to do in the first place. Editing would be a horrible process, something he really would need at least two weeks to do. 

If his muses were kind to him, which he prayed they would be, he would finish the novel within two days time and that would leave him enough time to edit two of the shorter chapters a day, with a day for each longer chapter. Then he would have a few days of cushion time because he was realistic and knew if he tried to work everyday he'd have a break down. He couldn't sit there and analyze his words without wanting to change everything or add in long winded sentences that would be pointless in the long run. He needed to take breaks to keep himself focused or it would all go to hell.

He had learned his lesson and this time he had something to help him not become a single minded editing machine.

Suga looked up from his laptop and out onto the lawn. Dai was laying in the grass by the hot spring, soaking up sunlight like he was solar powered. In front of him the two giant crows Suga had concluded were the dog's friends were tugging on either ends of a braided rope toy. The birds had been playing with Dai for a majority of the morning, chasing him and being chased in turn, running and flying after the tennis ball Suga would occasionally throw for them, and long games of tug of war. The smaller of the crows seemed intent on winning everything, and when it did, would caw and flap its wings with what Suga could only guess was pride. 

It had been a good morning thus far. 

Suga reached for his mug, frowning when he found it empty. Had he really gone through another cup? But that was a good thing, he thought, getting so caught up in his work he didn't realize he had finished his drink and the little sandwiches he had made to go with them. 

He saved the documents he had open three times before closing his laptop and getting up to go back into the cabin. As he walked from the bedroom to the kitchen, he paused in the main room. The blankets were still all laid out in front of the fireplace covered in soot and fur. It made him laugh a little; less than two meters away was a huge plush couch and he had barely sat on it. In the same respect, he had slept more on the floor out in the living room than the beautiful cloud of a bed that he was paying for. 

He had been right to think the richness of the cabin would be lost on him. 

But it was okay with him. What he enjoyed was laying in front of the fire each night with Dai, watching things on his laptop until he fell asleep. He'd pay any price for that. 

Though he should probably at least wash the blankets they'd been lying on. 

Suga set his coffee tray down on the table and gathered the blankets up into his arms before he carried them to where the laundry machines were. 

He was lucky enough that all of the blankets could be stuffed into one load. He had not been planning on doing any laundry and having to get up and down to attend to it would really interrupt his work flow. Suga was already doing that to himself by getting distracted by such simple things when he had only gotten up to get more coffee. 

Mentally chastising himself for his short attention span, he hurried back out to the main room to grab his tray and bring it to the kitchen. Starting up a new pot of coffee was something he didn’t have to think too hard on; as much as Suga enjoyed coffee he had never been a connoisseur of it. He had an automatic machine back in his apartment and had been glad to see the cabin was the same. All he needed to do was dump out the old grinds, then fill the new basket to the very top, add in some water, and press a button. 

Modern technology was amazing. 

As the coffee started to drip, Suga turned to the sink to rinse out his mug. It wasn’t so much dirty as he needed to get out any of the lingering droplets of his previous drink. As he held it in his hands under the water flow, the pocket of his sweatpants begin to vibrate then start to play some classical sounding tune he didn’t know the name of. 

He made a face; the ringtone belonged to his manager, who definitely should not have been calling him. 

Kiyoko didn’t baby him. She had given him until the end of his cabin stay to send in his manuscript and she wouldn’t nag him every other day to see how far he had gotten. It was not in her style. She’d only be calling to tell him something important. If it wasn’t important, she’d email him. It was as simple as that. 

Suga’s stomach dropped; he couldn’t think of any pleasant news she could be wanting to tell him. The only thing he could think of that would warrant a call was was a message that his deadline had been pushed forward.

With a deep sigh, trying to prepare himself for the worst, Suga set his mug onto the counter, dried his hands, and then answered his phone. 

“Hello?”

“Hello, Sugawara-san. I was wondering how long it would take you to answer my call.” Kiyoko said, her voice light and almost teasing. 

Suga pouted at his phone. “I was preparing myself for whatever you're going to tell me.” 

Kiyoko laughed, clearly amused by his distress. “I'm not calling to criticize you. In fact, quite the opposite. I think you'll like what I've got to tell you.”

Suga pulled his phone away from his ear to give it a disbelieving look, not trusting that Kiyoko could have anything good to tell him. 

“Oh?” He finally asked.

“Do you remember the second publisher you met with in New York?” The woman asked and Suga frowned, trying to think back. He had met many publishers in America, trying to get his work translated into English. It had been difficult, because while some houses wanted to translate only his short stories and others only novels. It had been a frustrating time because it had caused so much trouble for Suga and his desires. He could only be published by one house in America and he had stubbornly not wanted to compromise. 

How could anything from that time be good news?

“I don't,” Suga admitted after a few moments. 

Kiyoko hummed and Suga could picture her tapping her chin with her finger. 

“It had the gentleman who was very interested in your short stories.” She started, “He already had a copy of your work in the original Japanese, even though he couldn't read it.”

“Oh, yes,” Suga said, recalling the man vaguely. It had been one of the few people he had enjoyed talking to in the city. The man had been very enthusiastic about translating his series of short stories, but unfortunately the company did not publish novels.

Keeping the phone to his ear, he slowly crouched down to the floor and leaned his back against the cabinets, having the suspicion he wouldn't want to be standing when Kiyoko finally told him whatever she had called for.

“Well, I do not know the details, but he recommended _Spherical_ to a friend of his who is a producer.” As Kiyoko spoke, Suga felt his heart start to pound in his chest. She couldn't be leading up to what he thought she was. There was no way. That sort of thing did not happen to him. “Again, I am unsure of the details, but from my understanding, this friend is going to create an anthology of hour long horror films, to be aired on one of the popular American streaming sites.” 

Suga could barely hear her over the sound of his blood rushing in his head. This couldn't be happening. 

“He would like to adapt _Spherical_ into one of those films.”

Suga’s hands went up to cover his mouth, physically holding back a sob that wanted to escape. He had never, not even in his wildest of dreams, thought anything he would ever wrote would be considered for film. Those sort of things happened to people who wrote romance and young adult novels with heavy dystopian themes. Or authors who had been writing longer than Suga had been alive, long established as geniuses of the genre. Not Suga, whose first published novel had come out three years earlier and was only available in Japanese.

Someone thought something he had written was good enough to come off the pages it was printed on? And had actually gotten in contact with his manager over it?

And they had chosen _Spherical_ , his baby, the first thing he had written after he had lost all motivation in his second year of university. The first few pages of which had gotten the interest of the publishing house he was signed with. It was his favorite of anything he had written. 

And someone wanted to make it into a movie.

“Sugawara-san, are you still there?”

“Ah, yes, sorry,” Suga whispered, his voice coming out as emotional as he felt. “They want to...to adapt _Spherical_.” He repeated. It felt unreal. Some sort of joke, but Kiyoko would never be the type to do such a thing. “Ah, who is it?”

“I do not remember his name off the top of my head, I am sorry. I am out of the office at the moment.” She explained and Suga found himself nodding. It didn't matter who, at the moment. It was the fact that they had made the request. “I have a video conference scheduled with them tomorrow. It's very sudden, I just heard today, but I had the time open. I will get all of the details then. I just wanted to make sure it was something you wished to move forward with before I listened to their offer.”

“Yes!” Suga shouted. Yes, he wanted to move forward with it, to learn more, to have his story come to life on the screen. He wanted it more than anything now that he knew it was an option, a possibility. Who would turn down such a possibility?

“Yes,” he repeated, softer. “I'd like it very much.”

Kiyoko chuckled into the phone. “I did not want to assume.”

“Thank you, Kiyoko.” For calling him, for sending him to New York, for everything she had done to him. 

She hummed into his ear, then said in the softest voice, one Suga knew was reserved for true affection, “Congratulations, Koushi.”

The tears Suga had been holding back began to trickle down his cheeks. 

“Thank you.” he repeated, then clamped his hand tighter over his mouth, to keep himself from saying it again and again.

“I'll send you the details as I get them, in email. I won't make you suffer through another phone call.” Suga could hear the smile in her voice, the gentle tease, but he couldn't make his voice work to respond to her. All he could do was nod, knowing she couldn't see him.

She took pity on him. “I'll let you go now. Have a good day, Sugawara-san.” 

Even after Kiyoko had hung up, Suga kept the phone to his ear, still trying to process exactly what he had been told. It was hard for him to accept; he had become relatively successful in his home country, enough that he could afford to rent a luxurious cabin in the woods for a month without even needing to glance at his back account, but he had had no such luck in other countries. So an American wanting to adapt his work into film was simply incomprehensible to him. 

He had to be dreaming. He was hallucinating or something. 

A giddy laugh bubbled up from his chest and escaped his lips. He dropped his phone so he could place his other hand over the one already over his lips. He couldn't keep his excitement contained and more stuttered laughter came from inside him. 

Even if everything fell through and things never got past the planning stages, Suga would consider the phone call he had received that day one of the best moments of his career. His work has been noticed, appreciated. Someone had read what he had wrote and wanted to share it with the world, just as Suga had wanted to share the stories inside of him. 

Suga sprung up to his feet and let out a loud whoop of joy. He pumped his hands into the air and spun in a circle, laughing freely. 

“Yes, yes, yes!” He cheered loudly, spinning and waving his arms around as he did. He felt so light, so excited. Just the idea of it all made him want to jump up and down with joy and scream until his lungs hurt. 

Suga barely heard the clicking of nails and thudding of paws over his own noise. He swirled around to the entrance of the kitchen as Dai slid around the corner, ears back and hackles raised. 

The beast was unable to stop his running, no traction on the hardwood floors, and ended up crashing into the cabinets as he failed to skid to a stop. The entire wall shook with the force of the impact, the canisters on the counters falling over and some rolling to the floor with a loud clang.

Suga’s hands clamped back over his mouth to try to hide his laughter as Dai scrambled back up into standing. The dog swung his head around, ears still flat to his head and his fur bristled. It took Suga a few moments to realize he was searching for danger. 

He had been startled by the silver haired man’s sudden outburst and had run to protect him.

The giddiness in his chest grew and Suga dropped down to his knees and held out his arms to Dai. The dog's ears pricked forward, then he moved up to Suga and began sniffing at him. Checking to make sure he was alright, no doubt. Suga was very much alright. 

Suga dug his fingers into Dai’s fur, scratching lovingly at his neck. “Silly boy, there is no danger here. I'm perfectly alright. Perfect. Perfect right now.” He leaned in to rest his head on Dai’s shoulder, a grin coming to his lips. “I'm sorry for worrying you.”

The giant dog sat himself down while crooking his head over Suga’s shoulder, like he was hugging him. Suga looped his arms around Dai’s neck in return, holding him loosely. He turned to press his face into the sun kissed fur, smiling into it.

“I got news. Something I wrote, that I love, might be get turned into a movie. I could watch it and other people could watch it.” He squeezed Dai. “You could watch it.”

The dog snuffled against Suga’s back in response and the man laughed. “We could watch it together, yes.” He closed his eyes and leaned into the beast for a moment before pulling back as a thought occurred to him. He grinned at Dai, rubbing a little roughly at the beast’s neck. The dog thumped his tail into the ground at the affection and the excitement coming off of Suga. “I have to tell Tooru!”

Suga pushed himself back up and was promptly nearly knocked over by Dai pressing his face into his stomach. Suga scritched at his ears, digging his fingers into the flesh there, earning more happy tail wags. “Am I making up for all the petting I didn’t do this morning?” Dai tilted his head, looking up at Suga with one eye and his tongue lolling out of his mouth. The silver haired man huffed a laugh. “Silly boy.” But he stayed in the moment, loving on the beast until his fingers started to cramp up. 

It took Suga a moment to find his phone and when he did he opened up a new message to Oikawa. He asked, in very blunt words with no use of emojis, if the other man was available for a video call. He knew he was coming off like he was upset, and it was kind of the point. A little bit of teasing to make the reveal more sweet. 

He only had to wait a minute for a reply. 

“There are lots of running and flailing emojis,” Suga explained to Dai before reading the message out loud, “‘We are getting ready to leave but we can do a quick call.’” 

He gave Dai one last scratch to the ear before hurrying out of the kitchen to retrieve his laptop from the balcony. It took him a moment to unplug everything and move it all back inside, but he set everything back up on the bed as quickly as he could. He brought up his messenger program, and as soon as he signed in, his screen lit up with an notification that he was receiving a video call from ‘UFho’. He happily accepted, then clicked the fullscreen option as the call loaded.

Oikawa appeared, taking up most of Suga’s screen, wearing a oversized hoodie Suga knew belonged to Iwaizumi. 

“Kou-chan!” Oikawa greeted, giving a cheery wave.

Suga waved back, then leaned in closer to the camera and squinted. “I thought you were getting ready to leave? You look like you just got up.”

Oikawa huffed, then flipped up the hood of what he was wearing and pulled the strings to make it slightly smaller. “We are about to leave,” he all but whined, “I’m going to be stuck in a car for over four hours, and that is without traffic!”

Suga gave his friend a puzzled look and Oikawa pushed the hood back off before answering. “We’re going to Sendai to visit Iwa-nee-chan for her birthday. Her husband is still overseas.” He wrinkled his nose and looked off screen. “We could have flown but someone forgot to make arrangements!” 

“I told you to do it, Shittykawa!” Iwaizumi yelled from somewhere off screen. “It was your idea!”

Oikawa put his hand over his heart and looked back to Suga with a pout. “Look at how he treats me, Kou-chan! First he yells at me then he stuffs me into a too small car!” 

“Marital bliss,” Suga teased. Oikawa broke into a grin and held up his hand to show off his wedding ring.

“Isn’t it great?” Both of them laughed and Suga distinctly heard Iwaizumi snort in the background. “But, Kou-chan, as much as I’d love to go on about me and my wonderful amazing perfect marriage, we have limited time and you are not supposed to be talking to anyone, Mister I-Can't-Distracted.” 

Suga crossed his arms over his chest and stuck out his tongue at his friend for the comment. Oikawa simply leaned forward, resting his chin in his hand, and smirked at Suga, waiting. It was a standoff that only lasted for a moment. 

“Shimizu-san called me.”

“Shimizu...your manager?” Suga nodded and Oikawa gasped. “Bad?” The brunette asked in almost a whisper, hunching up his shoulders in a defensive manner. 

Suga bit his lips, trying to hold back his smile, but it didn’t work. He shook his head quickly. “Not bad.” He leaned forward in excitement, his face taking up the entire camera. “Tooru, she said someone is interested in making _Spherical_ into a movie!”

“What?” Oikawa asked, taking a moment to process the words. “What? Oh my god, Koushi!” He began to bounce up and down, clearly elated for his friend, and Suga joined him. “Koushi, that is amazing! That is so amazing!” 

“Eh? What’s going on?” Iwaizumi asked from offscreen, closer to the laptop but still not in the shot. At least, until Oikawa grabbed his arm and began to shake it. 

“Kou-chan’s getting a movie!”

“Maybe!” Suga added, not wanting Iwaizumi to get the wrong idea. “I might be getting a movie!”

Iwaizumi sat himself down into Oikawa’s lap, earning a groan and a protest of, “Iwa-chan, you’re heavy!” but ignored it. Instead he gave Sugawara a bright smile. 

“Congratulations, Suga.” 

“Thank you, Hajime. You look well, I’m glad your black eye has faded.” 

Iwaizumi snorted again while Oikawa looked completely scandalized behind him. “That was an accident, you traitor!” 

“Of course it was, dear.” Iwaizumi deadpanned. Suga threw back his head and laughed. 

He missed his friends. It had only been a few days but he missed their antics and the way they made him feel always at home, no matter where he was. He knew that being around them in person would only distract him, but perhaps calls every other day wouldn’t be so bad. 

In front of him, past his laptop and the bed, the door creaked open. Suga looked over and the smile that he had been wearing dropped to something softer at the sight of Dai, standing in the doorway with his head tilted to one side, like he was trying to figure out who Suga was talking to. The silver haired man pat the bed beside him.

“Do you guys want to meet Dai before you have leave?” Suga asked, his voice as soft as his expression. 

“You are going to subjecting me to four hours of ‘can we get a puppy’, bastard.” Iwaizumi said while Oikawa cried ‘Yes’ over him. 

Suga pat the bed again and the large dog jumped up beside him. Suga’s quickly steadied the laptop before it fell over, then held it still while Dai leaned in and began to sniff at it. 

Oikawa and Iwaizumi both seemed to be holding their breath, not wanting to startle the dog as he inspected the laptop, trying to find where the other voices were coming from. Finally Dai stepped back and sat beside Suga, head still cocked to one side and his ears forward in interest. He barely fit into the frame of the camera. 

“Kou-chan, my second love, my silver haired prince, my beautiful best friend I am not married to,” Oikawa began in a hushed tone, “that is not a puppy.”

“That is a fucking wolf.” Iwaizumi added bluntly. 

Suga turned his head to look up at Dai. He was large, bigger than any dog Suga had ever seen, and his teeth were very sharp and dangerous looking, but he didn’t look like any wolf Suga had ever seen pictures of. For starters, he was all dark brown and black, not grey and fluffy. He looked back to his laptop with a frown. 

“He’s just big.”

“Suga, that is very clearly a wolf.”

“Oh my god, Kou-chan, I was worried about ghosts and Annie Wilkes breaking your ankles with a sledgehammer when I should have been worried about you being eaten by a wolf!” Oikawa cried, flopping against Iwaizumi’s back and hiding his face in his husband’s shoulder.

“Okay, he is very big.” Suga said slowly, reaching out to scratch at Dai’s neck as he did. The dog leaned into the touch, then sunk down so he was laying against Suga’s side. “He’s not dangerous though.” 

“He could eat you in like two bites, Kou-chan.” 

“How did you even manage this? That is like..an American wolf or something.” 

“He’s not a wolf. He’s just, a very big dog. A very big dog who loves belly scratches.” Suga said before he began to scratch at Dai’s side and the beast promptly rolled onto his back so Suga had access to his stomach. Suga beamed as Dai thumped his tail against the bed and kicked his hind leg in the air in enjoyment. “And I told you,” Suga added, looking back to the laptop, “he was outside the cabin. He was hurt.” 

He was still hurt, but the dog seemed to be healing well. When Suga had changed his bandages that morning, the wound looked like it had fully closed and was starting to scab. 

“I...I don’t even know what to say to that.” Oikawa sighed, resting his chin on Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “Are you sure he’s not dangerous? He so big.”

“He’s a big teddy bear,” Suga countered. “Onaga is big and he’s not dangerous.” 

“I don’t know who that is.” Iwaizumi said while Oikawa whined again. 

“You worry me, Koushi.” 

“It’s fine,” Suga dismissed. He looked down to Dai and rubbed the dog’s belly more. “You won’t hurt me, will you, boy?” 

The beast rolled, nearly knocking Suga down as he did, so he could lean up and lick at the man’s face, tail swaying joyfully against the bed. Suga laughed and buried his fingers into Dai’s fur, holding the dog close as he got his kisses. 

After a moment he gently pushed Dai’s muzzle away and looked to his laptop. Both Iwaizumi and Oikawa were watching him, the latter with a soft sort of smile on his face that rarely wore. Suga felt his cheeks begin to heat up.

“What are you staring at?”

“Nothing,” the brunette said, the smile turning quickly into something brighter. “You should celebrate!”

“Celebrate?” Suga asked, slightly lost in his friend's sudden mood change.

“Yes! Celebrate the chance your book will be turned into a movie! Then Iwa-chan can finally understand what happens in it!”

“Hey!”

Suga blinked, considering the possibility, then shook his head. “No, I'm out here to work. Plus, there is no fun in going out alone.”

Oikawa waved a hand at him. “You don't have to go out to celebrate. You can stay in. Wear that cute little sweater I got you, get totally smashed, and watch bad zombies movie.”

“I have to work.” Suga repeated, though with not much enthusiasm. 

“They put up that new show you wanted to watch. The one where we couldn't figure out if it was a monster show or about a cannibal.” Oikawa said, trying to tempt Suga. The silver haired man pursed his lips together at the way his friend was smirking. “It's really really bad.”

“It's horrible,” Iwaizumi agreed suddenly. Oikawa nodded behind him. “We couldn't get past two episodes.”

“You're supposed to be the responsible one!” Suga accused, glaring at the other man. Why were they ganging up on him?

“I'm just stating a fact.” 

Suga pouted and then mumbled to himself. “I forget you're as devious as he is at times.” 

He huffed, then spoke louder, “You just want me to get drunk and send lewd selfies.” 

Dai lifted up his head from where he had rested it on Suga’s leg, ears perked up in interest.

“Those are always a plus,” Oikawa hummed, then leaned over Iwaizumi’s shoulder, looking Suga up and down lecherously, “Do you still have your lingerie?”

“Didn't bring it with me.” Suga replied smoothly, refusing to raise to the bait and blush. He wasn't ashamed he had such undergarments. He and Oikawa had each gotten sets of panties and garter belts when out shopping for silk socks for the wedding. It had been a joke, to relieve the tension and stress that Oikawa had been under, but Suga had ended up keeping his. 

They had been fun to tease with.

Not that he had anyone to tease, now.

“I did bring the stupid sweater, though.” Suga added, trying and failing to ignore the sudden ache in his heart the thought of the lingerie caused. 

“Proof you planned to celebrate all along.” Oikawa stated with confidence. Suga watched as Iwaizumi checked his watch, then nudged his husband in the ribs. The brunette pouted a moment, then gave a big grin to the camera. “We will be waiting for your drunk selfies, Kou-chan! Have fun with your wolf!” 

The call ended before Suga could reply. The silver haired man closed his laptop with a sigh, then fell back into the bed. Dai quickly crawled beside him and rested his head on Suga’s chest, swishing his tail along the man’s leg slowly. 

“I did write a good amount today. I’m so close to being done.” Suga said with another sigh, reaching up to run his fingers through Dai’s fur as he talked to himself. “I was going to celebrate when I actually finished writing.” He closed his eyes for a moment then looked up to the ceiling, lips pulling into a frown. “But I think my muse is gone now.” 

He had known Oikawa hadn’t meant to dredge up a memory with his teasing; the brunette hadn’t even known that Suga had actually worn the lingerie. But it was there, brushing along the edge of his mind, sucking away the joy he had just been feeling. 

The shocked look the first time he had worn the garter belt in front of someone else, the feeling of lace being pulled slowly down his thighs, the praise and swears whispered into his ears; they were all crushing the words that usually swirled in his mind, itching to be let out through his fingers. 

He watched through his lashes as Dai pushed himself up to nose at Suga’s cheek, then gave him a small, comforting lick. The dog’s ears had gone flat to the side, like he was concerned. Suga rubbed at his neck, trying to soothe his friend. Dai didn't need to be worried because Suga’s mood had soured.

“I think Tooru is right. I need the bad zombie show. And booze.” Suga scrunched up his nose slightly. “If they can’t get through two episodes I will definitely need booze.” 

+++

Maybe, perhaps, this had not been Suga’s brightest idea. He should have thought things through more clearly. All he was doing was making himself suffer.

“You can't,” Suga whispered into Dai’s shoulder, having turned his face yet again from the laptop screen, “You can't. That's not how that works.” He groaned then brought the bottle of champagne he was holding to his lips and took a drink. He had meant to space out his sips, to get a nice buzz as he watched the show. That had all gone out the door within the first ten minutes of the show and he had already finished the first of the two bottles he had bought before the end of the second episode. 

Dai nudged at his side sympathetically, then licked at his arm. Suga lifted his head and pouted at the beast. “Why would anyone want to have sex with a zombie? Like, it doesn't even make sense. It would be all cold and can the zombie even get off? It doesn't have blood flow. It shouldn't even be aroused. It's weird necrophilia and no wonder they couldn't watch this. They aren't even showing anything and I am thoroughly disgusted.” 

He managed to look back to the screen as the third episode began. It started off decently enough, even if it made Suga cringe a few time, and there were luckily no surprise sex scenes throughout the twenty minutes of watching. He nursed his bottle as he watched someone eat an arm, mumbling about the lack of gore that should be involved when chopping up a human body. 

“Unless you pop it out of the socket and cut the tendons you can't just...rip it off like that. Does she have super strength to go along with her magically wet vagina?” Suga huffed.

Dai twitched his ears in what Suga assumed was agreement just as Suga leaned up to set the still half full bottle of champagne on the bedside table. He flopped back down onto the beast, who took it all in good sport not even grunting at the sudden weight, just as the scene changed on screen. Something caught his eye and Suga found himself clutching at his sweater. 

He had changed into it when he had gotten back to the cabin, just like Oikawa had suggested. He hadn't meant it, calling the thing stupid. He adored the thing; it was soft and just slightly big on him, the cuffs going down to his knuckles. It was warm and made him feel safe, but also a bit sexy. It went down over his hips, making it look like he was wearing nothing underneath if he didn't wear pants.

He had used the illusion more than a few times and enjoyed how others had reacted to it. How Dai had reacted, tripping over his paws when Suga had come from the bathroom. 

He wondered if Dai would have thought it weird if he could see Suga wear stockings and a garter belt with the sweater as the man had done many times before. 

Did dogs even think about things like that?

Suga had the feeling Dai wouldn't care if he enjoyed wearing such things. 

He rubbed his naked thighs together, frowning at how they didn't feel smooth or silky.

Maybe he should have brought the lingerie.

He didn't have anyone to tease but they still felt nice on his skin. He could have been wearing them now with his big sweater, as he drank too much too fast and watched a horrible zombie show that had way too much necrophilia.

He was brought from his thoughts as Dai shifted, moving to gently nudge Suga down onto the bed before he stood up and shook. Suga tilted his head back on the blankets, watching in confusion as the dog scratched at his ear before leaping off the bed. Dai trodded out of the room, and Suga pouted as he did. 

Clumsily he rolled over and slapped at his keyboard to pause the show. He didn't want to watch it without Dai. It was their thing to do together, it was their show, and he knew the dog wouldn't just leave in the middle of an episode like that. He had never done such a thing before. Maybe he needed water, or to use the bathroom. Suga had fallen on him pretty hard.

He would just wait until the beast came back to continue watching. 

Suga rolled onto his side, closing his eyes as he did and his hands going down to play with the hem of his sweater. His fingers curled around the fabric, tugging it taught before scrunching it all up again and repeating the process. He really did adore the garment, it was so wonderfully soft on his skin. 

His fingers brushed the waistband of his briefs and Suga thought back to his lingerie again. It was soft as well and he was regretting leaving the items back in Tokyo. 

He remembered the first time he had worn the sweater and garter belt together with a smile. It hadn’t been with the intent to come off as sexy; he had been working, wearing the oversized sweater with some sweatpants, and he had been writing a character who was wearing lingerie. She was supposed to have been taking it off in a hurry as she ran through the woods and Suga hadn’t been able to figure out how to describe the process. So he had decided to act it out. He had just finished clipping the garter belt to the stockings when his front door had swung open with an unexpected guest. 

Suga had found out that the character hadn’t needed to take off her lingerie while running because it turned out garter belts were extremely flexible. Or at least, the one Suga owned was. 

He had never been bent over so many different surfaces in one sitting in his life. It had been a very memorable experience. 

Suga didn’t realize he had stopped playing with his sweater until he was loudly moaning into the bed.

He cracked open his eyes and looked down his body through his lashes. When had he gotten hard? When had he slipped his hand past his waistband and began to stroke himself? He squeezed around the base of his cock and let out another moan. 

It was wrong and he shouldn’t be doing it, shouldn’t have gotten aroused thinking about things that happened in the past. Things he could no longer do with the person he was thinking of. A person who was with someone else now. 

But he couldn’t stop; couldn’t stop his mind from going back to the memory. He slowly started to ghost his hand up and down his cock, barely applying any pressure as he remembered being laid out on the couch. With his free hand, he pushed the sweater up until it was piling over his chest, like it was in the memory. His scar and tattoo had been exposed, so they could be kissed and touched as He had made his way down Suga’s body. Everything had been so soft and sweet. 

Even when his leg had been thrown over a broad shoulder and his hips raised off the couch, it had been slow. It felt like it had taken hours with how much he had been teased. Kisses to his inner thighs and hip bones and everywhere but where Suga had wanted those lips to be. 

Suga’s grip tightened around his shaft as he remembered the pretty lace thong he had been in being pushed aside. He had been told they wouldn’t be taken off; just pushed aside for easier access. Then he had been assaulted with a tongue and he had screamed. Suga hadn’t expected it to tease his hole or to push into him, but it had, and it had been so sweet. But so painstakingly slow. 

But He was always slow, always savouring the moments as he took Suga apart piece by piece. There had been times where Suga had believed everything was always so gentle because he had come off as so fragile. He was thin and pale and his medical history had played up that aspect of him, but he had learned that wasn’t the case. His lover just had a preference for taking his time. 

Maybe He had just liked to hear Suga beg. Being opened up so slowly had always turned Suga into a sobbing mess, begging for more and more until he couldn't take it anymore. 

Suga rolled onto his back and spread his legs wide, imagining someone between them as his pace around his cock quickened. He pushed his hips up off the bed as he clearly remembered one teasing finger pushing into him. It hadn’t been enough and he had said as much. His brattiness had been answered with a curl of the teasing finger, hitting his sweet spot perfectly. 

Suga sloppily licked and sucked at his own fingers before pushing his briefs down just enough to get his hand between his cheeks. He rubbed at his hole, testing it, and gave a whine of protest when it didn’t feel the same. 

His fingers weren’t right. Even when he slowly pushed into himself, they didn’t meet what he remembered. His fingers were too long, too thin. They didn’t have the built up callouses that felt so amazing. 

Suga added twists to his strokes, focusing on the head of his cock as he remembered the fingers he loved so much. They were thick and powerful and he had only ever needed two to fully prepare him. He had taken three before and had nearly lost it at how much it was and how full he had felt. He had come from that feeling alone, not needing any other touches. 

Though, Suga had lost count of how many times he had come simply from two fingers inside of him and a pair of lips on his neck. 

His hips began to stutter as he imagined it. Thick fingers scissoring him open, while praise was whispered into his neck; how good he felt, how pretty he was like that, begging and panting and just a mess. How nice it would be to fuck him slowly in the lacey lingerie until he was a boneless pile bent over the couch. 

Suga came with a loud cry, barely holding back the name on his tongue. He pumped himself through the orgasm until the insides of his briefs were stained and he was going limp in his hand. He pushed the messy garment down his thighs, then kicked it off onto the floor somewhere before flopping back down onto the bed. 

Guilt pooled in his belly as post-orgasmic exhaustion took over. 

Suga rolled onto his side with a groan; he should not have done that. He should not have thoughts about that. He really was a horrible, selfish person; masturbating to the thought of his ex. What the hell kind of person was he? 

He curled in on himself, bringing his hands up to hide his face in. He was such a bad person, a horrible self person and it really was no wonder he was alone. 

The bed dipped with a new weight, and then something wet and cold was pressed against Suga’s forehead. He parted his fingers to look up through them, heart beating fast at the sight of amber eyes. Amber eyes filled with so much emotion, all focused on Suga. 

It took him a moment to realize it was just Dai looking down at him. 

The dog snuffled at Suga’s fingers, then licked at them eagerly. The man watched a moment, blinking slowly before he realized what Dai was doing. He pulled his hand away and held it to his chest, a blush working up his cheeks. 

“Not for you..” He mumbled, embarrassed. The beast snorted in his face before turning away. Suga felt the bed tilt and wobble as Dai walked over it, closing his eyes and trying to forget what he had just done. Maybe if he forgot, he wouldn’t feel so awful over it. 

There was shuffling beside him, then suddenly, a light weight dropped over his frame. Suga realized, without opening his eyes, that it was a blanket and pulled it closer to himself, tangling his bare legs in it. He wasn’t cold, but it felt good, safe, to just be wrapped up in something warm. 

He felt as Dai laid down beside, but slightly above him, curling his large body around Suga’s. It was strange; just two small changes improved his mood so much. His hand snaked out from under the blanket and he curled his fingers into thick fur, before he pushed himself up just enough to rest his head onto Dai’s side. 

He smiled just slightly as he felt the beast’s tail swish against his thighs. It was calming, and Suga felt himself begin to drift to sleep, listening to a steady, strong heartbeat of something that cared for him. 

+++

The room was dark when he opened his eyes. There was nothing around him, no light from his laptop or outlines of furniture around the room. Dai wasn't on the bed with him, probably off getting water or playing with the birds. 

Suga sat up, frowning as he realized how cold he was. He felt around for the blanket he vaguely remembered being there. It was gone.

So was the sweater he knew he had been wearing.

He was nude. 

He scrunched his nose up in confusion and moved to the edge of the bed, swinging his legs over the side. It was odd, but not completely out of the ordinary. He had the tendency to kick away his blankets when he was drunk, as well as strip if he went a little over board. He didn't think he had drank that much, though. He usually remembered waking up and doing things, even if at least hazily. 

Deciding being cold was more of a concern than not remembering his drunken antics, Suga pushed himself up into standing. His legs shook, feeling like jelly, but he managed to stay upright. 

He had definitely drank way too much.

But he didn't feel sick or hungover. 

Maybe he was still drunk and didn't realize it. 

He took a few wobbly steps towards the door to the en suite, but it didn't seem to get closer. He frowned again, then took another three long steps. 

It was just as far away as it had been. 

Suga looked over his shoulder.

The bed was right behind him, like he hadn't moved at all. 

He was still very drunk then, if he thought he was walking and not actually moving. Maybe he should lay down. Deciding that would be the best course of action he slowly sat back down on the bed.

The sheets were sticky, cold, and wet and Suga clumsily jumped back into standing. He stumbled, his legs feeling weak, but he managed to stay upright.

Confused, Suga reached down and felt along the bed. What the hell had happened? Had he knocked of the other bottle of champagne when he had been flailing about in his sleep? But if he had done that, would the sheets still feel like they were soaked? And that wouldn’t explain the stickiness, or the fact that whatever was coating the bed had a greater viscosity than champagne. 

Suga brought his hands up closer to his face, trying to see them in the lack of light, to see what they had been stained black with.

With his heart starting to pound in his chest, Suga rubbed his fingers together, hoping it would help him figure out what he had spilled all over the bed. It was slick and sticky at the same time, and it had a strong, familiar smell. Something chemically, but it was strangely pleasant. 

He stepped away from the bed, thinking he needed to change the sheets and blankets, put them in the wash, and as he set his foot back down on the ground, he nearly slipped and fell back. Whatever had been coating the bed had dripped down to the floor, making a pool around his feet.

Hoping to see how far the wetness had spread, Suga looked down. His breath caught in his throat and it felt like his heart was no longer pounding. 

His stomach and legs were covered with the black slick, dripping down out of him from the scar on his abdomen. It had been split open and the substance was just trickling out of him, bubbling occasionally as it slid down his body. It didn't hurt, he couldn't even feel it save the bigger drops rolling down his skin. 

He was completely numb to it.

His hands flew to his middle and pushed onto the wound, trying to stop anything else from coming out of him. He couldn't lose anymore of whatever it was. He'd go into shock. Not feeling anything was the first sign of that, wasn't it?

Could he go into shock if he wasn't bleeding?

Because it wasn’t blood. He knew it wasn’t blood. It didn’t smell like blood, it didn't feel like blood. He wouldn’t have been able to stand if so much blood had come out of him. 

What the hell was it, though? What the hell was coming out of him?

Suga doubled over and pushed harder against his stomach, trying to fight the panicked sob wanting to come from his throat and failing. 

He didn't know what was happening to him.

He was scared. 

Something pushed against his fingers from inside of him, something solid and warm and not black goop. 

He tightened his grip, trying to make a barrier so it would stay inside of him but whatever wanted out was insistent. It shoved against his fingers with such force he thought they would break. He pulled his hands away with another frightened sob. He watched with wide eyes something a little larger than his fist came out of his scar, covered in black slick. It made a disgusting noise as it hit the floor, and as the slick ran off of it, Suga could see what it was. 

It was almost bean shaped, but half of it was covered in bulbous lumps that seemed to be throbbing out of time with each other. The entire thing seemed to have a red sheen under the black slick clinging to it. 

Suga took a step away from it, away from the bed, his hands going up to cover his mouth to keep himself from screaming. 

On the floor his spleen pulsed in a pool of black goop. Each throb sent a wave out into the slick and the edges of the pool began to move, swirl. 

Suga tried to step back again and again, but he stayed exactly where he was, never getting further away as the edges of the pool spread out into wisps along the floor. They began to arch and curl and Suga realized they were making characters. 

The slick was ink and it was forming words.

Suga dug his fingers into his cheeks, watching as the ink wrote out his name in spindly characters. 

Suga shook his head, wanting to turn to run away, but his legs wouldn't work. He wasn't sure he'd be able to run in the first place, if he could get away from the bed. 

“You always do try to run away from your problems.” 

Suga’s head jerked up and he turned, looking for the source of the voice. There was no one, nothing around him, just the darkness and the bed. Suga dropped his hand from his mouth and curled them into fists by his sides.

“You ran from people by disappearing into your computer and you ran from Tokyo to avoid your feelings. And now you are trying to run from the truth.”

Suga continued to look around him, trying to pinpoint where the voice was, but it felt like it was coming from everywhere; above him, behind him, in front of him. But something about it felt familiar, Suga knew the voice. It was calm and cool, like it was water drifting over him, surrounding him. It felt like there was no emotion behind the words.

“All you are is a writer. It completely consumes you. You've run away from everything, everyone you claim to love, to hide in your own little world. Why should they wait for you to come back? You'll only just tell them about yourself, not caring what they have gone through, what they have to say.”

Suga clenched his jaw. The words weren't true, despite how they wrapped around his heart and squeezed. 

“You kept talking about yourself even when they weren't interested. The only friend you have is someone who was interested in your work. And you know He never read a single one of your stories.” 

Suga closed his eyes tightly and told himself to not listen to the voice. He had friends, people who loved him. He had Oikawa and Iwaizumi. Kiyoko was his manager, but also his friend. He hadn't spoken to Kuroo and Kenma in months, not since before he had gotten bronchitis, but he thought of them as friends.

“You were in the hospital for two weeks. They didn't even check in on you.”

Suga shook his head. He never told anyone when he was sick, and never when he had to go to the hospital for it. He didn't want them to worry. They always got so worried when he was sick.

“That is a pretty lie. You enjoyed it when He took care of you. You wanted to be sick longer so He would take care of you. Another show of how selfish you are. No wonder He never loved you.”

Suga took a step away from the bed, trying to escape from the voice, from its lies. 

“He never loved you.” The voice repeated and very suddenly Suga knew who was talking to him. It made it so much worse and his knees began to quake as the thorns around his heart tightened. The voice had said those words before, he remembered it clearly. There had been other words surrounding the sentence, changing the context, but those four words had been what had stuck to him, stuck in his brain, stuck in his soul. 

“How long were you together? Almost two years, wasn’t it? Almost two years and his heart never once belonged to you.” The voice’s words stayed calm, despite the harshness of them. There was no glee taken from the way Suga’s heart was crumbling. Just like water filling someone’s lungs as it drowned them.

“You were just a placeholder and you knew it. The entire time you knew He never loved you and kept selfishly wishing he would. You knew better than anyone how He felt and you kept him to yourself.” Suga’s hands shot up and he gripped at his ears, trying to block out the voice. To block out the truth of what it was saying. 

Selfish. Selfish. He had been so selfish. He was always selfish. 

The voice only got louder.

“And you didn’t even stay around after you hurt him. You fled, fled away from your problems. Are you going to run now, Sugawara Koushi? Run away from reality?”

His knees gave out and Suga crumbled to the floor. He hunched over on himself, pushing his hands into his ears, wishing the voice would stop. He was horrible. He knew he was horrible. He didn't need the voice telling him exactly how so. He knew. He knew so well. 

“Can you even run? Can your body even help your mind, or is it going to betray you yet again? It didn’t let you run before. It trapped you in the city. Maybe it will trap you here and do us all a favor.” 

The voice was over him. 

Suga forced his eyes open and looked up at the figure. He was shrouded in shadow, save for piercing eyes that were glaring down at him. The narrowed eyes met his own for a moment before traveling down Suga’s body. Suga followed the gaze. 

His feet were gone; dissolved into a puddle of ink. His legs were following suit, his skin turning black and melting off of him, dripping down onto the floor in chunks. He lunged at his calves, reaching out to try to stop the blackness from spreading, but his hands were covered in it as well. His fingers bubbled and began to evaporate away. He couldn't clasp them around his disappearing legs. 

Suga opened his mouth to scream, to beg for help, but no noise came from his lips. Only more ink, dripping down to his chin, as it began to leak out of him and gagging his throat.

He couldn't breathe. 

No. He didn’t want this. His body couldn’t do this to him. It could fight. It wouldn’t give in, it wouldn’t betray him. He didn’t want to -

A boom echoed throughout the room, shaking everything and causing Suga to fall completely to the ground. He curled in on himself.

Suga clenched his eyes shut as the room began to quake with the force of the noise. It was like he was inside of a bell, but the booming didn’t hurt his ears, didn't leave his body ringing. With each boom he felt something warm and pleasant stir inside of him, chasing away the thorns that had been ripping at his heart. 

“Tch. Looks like your pet found a way to break my grip.” 

The voice was different, slightly higher, and full of annoyance. It was no longer calm water, but ice cutting into him.

Suga looked up.

The shadowy figure that had glared down at him with nothing but green eyes had morphed into two who had distinct features. A taller one with short golden hair, sharp eyes, and black horns curling around his ears. He looked regal in a high collared cloak that looked like it was made of shadows and his head held high, looking down at Suga with a scowl. 

The shorter figure looked decidedly unregal. His brown hair a messy mop, which matched the muddy and torn clothes he was wearing. They looked outdated, like they were from not only another decade, but another era altogether.The shorter figure was standing close to the first, almost completely on top of him, and Suga could see him just clutching at the cloak. 

“Did you get enough, Little One?” The regal figure asked, tilting his head towards his companion.

“Ah, yes, Tsukki.” 

The taller figure nodded, then with great flourish, threw up one side of the cloak and wrapped it around the messy one, like he was going to hold them close. When the fabric settled, they were both gone, and Suga was alone. 

He closed his eyes again, curling in on himself until his chest was touching his thighs but the movements were sluggish. His body was still melting, slower now that he was alone, but he could feel it. It didn’t hurt, not physically, but his heart and soul still ached from the words said to him. 

He was still drowning.

He was selfish. Horrible. Maybe he shouldn’t ever return to Tokyo. It would be better for everyone. 

Another boom echoed throughout the room.

It didn’t sound like thunder or an explosion. 

What had the regal figure said? His pet. 

Another boom.

Warmth. 

Safety. 

A bark. 

It was a bark. 

Suga’s eyes fluttered open, the white ceiling of the bedroom above him. He slowly rolled his head to the side, feeling the bed shift and give as he did. 

His vision was suddenly taken up by brown fur and large amber eyes. Dai flicked his ears back before he nudged at Suga’s cheek with his nose, whining as he did. 

The sound made his chest ache. 

“It’s okay,” Suga whispered, his voice strangely hoarse. He reached up, his arm feeling so heavy, and scratched at the beast’s neck. “I just had a bad dream.” 

He bounced slightly as Dai dropped into laying down, and when the dog settled he began to carefully lick at the man's face. Suga rolled onto his side to turn to him, groaning at the way his body protested the movement. He felt like he hadn’t slept at all; he felt groggy and weak, but strangely sober. He felt like he was in the recovery phase of a bad cold.

He pressed his face against Dai’s muzzle, holding himself close to the dog.

“I think I’m going to sleep more. Is that okay, boy?” 

Dai whined again and licked at him, tongue tickling his neck. Sug curled his fingers into the beast’s fur in response. 

“It’s okay, Dai. It was just a dream. And you’re here to protect me from the nightmares, right? You’ll keep me safe.” 

As Suga closed his eyes again, the moonlight shone in through the window, hitting the bed in such a way that Suga swore, just for a moment, that Dai was glowing. 

And when Suga fell back asleep, he dreamt of amber eyes watching over him.


	4. White Pepper

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Very special thank you to ChosenofKagami for inspiring the chapter :'D

All of him ached. He felt like he had been hit with a truck that then backed up and rolled over him again for good measure. His limbs felt like lead and there was a dull thudding behind his eyes that radiated down the back of his neck. 

Suga silently swore to never drink alone while watching bad shows again. 

As he slowly began to become more and more conscious he realized the weight that was on his chest was not figurative. Something was actually on top of him, something rather heavy.

Suga slowly blinked open his eyes and looked down his own body. Dai was curled against him, using his chest as a pillow, one large paw resting beside his head. The beast seemed to sense that Suga was awake and opened his amber eyes, staring up at the human. They locked gaze for a moment, before Dai leaned forward and began to sniff cautiously at Suga’s face and neck. The man didn’t move, allowing himself to be inspected until Dai deemed him worthy and began to lick at his cheek. 

“Hey, boy,” Suga mumbled, a small smile pulling at his lips at the affection. He felt more than saw the beast’s large tail began to thump against the bed. It took more effort than Suga was willing to admit for him to reach up and bury his fingers into the fur on Dai’s neck and his arms throbbed at the effort. “Let’s not get champagne drunk again, okay?” 

Dai huffed against his cheek, then laid his head down beside Suga’s. The silver haired man rolled onto his side, gritting his teeth at how sore his body felt, and draped his arm around the dog’s body. He looked over Dai’s muzzle and out the window, frowning at how the balcony was bathed in a gold light. 

“I slept all day?” He asked. He felt horrible, but sleeping all day seemed a little extreme, even for an intense hangover. But with how he felt, he could probably easily sleep another six hours.

Dai turned his head to lick at Suga’s nose. 

“There really is no point of getting up now, is there?” Suga said to himself, curling against Dai. His stomach growled at him in response. “I guess there is a point.” The man lifted his head slightly to look down at the dog he was lying against. “Did you stay here with me all day?” Dai thumped his tail into the bed as an answer, and Suga dipped down to press a kiss to his forehead. “Such a good boy, taking care of me like that. You deserve a treat.” 

Dai’s head jerked up so quickly Suga barely had time to move out of the way. The dog’s ears pricked forward and his tail was beating against the bed hard enough to shake it. Suga laughed at the excitement. 

“Yes, a treat for you. I’ve got something in mind.” 

Dai scrambled up into standing, jostling Suga and knocking him flat onto his back. The dog spun in a circle, before pressing his nose against Suga’s shoulder and sniffing at his sweater. Suga laughed again.

“No, silly boy, I don’t have it here! Off, off, it’s in the kitchen.” 

The dog pawed at the pillow Suga was using, almost pulling it out from under him, and the man took it as a sign. “Okay, okay, hold on.” 

The world spun as he pushed himself up into sitting, and he had to close his eyes tightly to keep himself from getting sick. His neck throbbed painfully while the rest of him ached uncomfortably, reminding him why he hadn't’ wanted to get up. He wanted to just flop back down into the bed. It took him minutes to work up to wanting to move again and he slowly swung his legs over the side of the bed. His limbs still felt like lead and jelly mixed together and he wasn’t quite sure he would be able to stand , let alone walk to the kitchen. 

Dai stepped down from the bed and Suga watched as the beast disappeared into the en suite. He returned a moment later, dragging the pajama pants Suga had worn a few nights ago along with him. The silver haired man felt his cheeks begin to warm up as he remembered that he was wearing nothing besides his sweater. 

As he watched Dai walk across the room, something shining on the floor caught his eye. With a frown, Suga squinted and leaned forward to better see. It looked to be water, or liquid of some kind, starting from the bedside table and making an arc around the bed, but there also seemed to be puddles inside of the arc, closer to the bed. He glanced toward the table once more and noted that the champagne bottle he was pretty sure he had not finished was missing. 

Maybe he had knocked it over in his sleep? It seemed to make sense, he was missing his blanket as well. He must have been flailing around at some point, as he tended to do when drunk. 

Dai was careful when crossing over the champagne, lifting his head up high so the pajamas wouldn’t drag through it, and then he deposited the clothing at Suga’s side. The man reached out and rubbed a slightly shaky hand along the beast’s jaw. 

“Good boy.” He mumbled before picking up the pants to pull them on. He was slow about it, having to continually pause to close his eyes as dizziness took him over again and again. Maybe his blood sugar was getting low or something, it would explain why he felt so wretched, beyond being hung over. Had he eaten anything more than tea sandwiches the day before? He couldn’t remember. 

But drinking on an empty stomach had been a very bad idea. He was surprised he hadn’t thrown up everywhere. 

Once he had his pants on all the way, Suga closed his eyes with a sigh. He was dreading trying to properly stand up. He wanted to lay back down. Maybe, if Suga gave clear instructions, Dai could go into the kitchen and bring him back some food. It seemed plausible; the dog was big enough and smart enough to open up the refrigerator. It was just debatable about whether or not said food would make it back to the bedroom. Suga estimated it was about a seventy percent chance that Dai would eat the food before he brought it back. 

He was a very good dog; he just liked food.

There was a puff of hot air against his hand, the only warning before Dai was licking him again. It was warm and the beast must have got him at just the right spot, because it sent a tingling feeling up his arm. The sensation made Suga shiver. He cracked open his eyes and looked down at Dai, who was staring right back at him, one ear cocked to the side. 

He wagged his tail tentatively and Suga gave him a small smile. 

“Two treats,” Suga promised, “but only if you help me to the kitchen, okay?”

Dai’s tail became a blur of movement and the man chuckled. 

Bracing himself, Suga planted his feet onto the ground, then pushed himself up into standing. The world tilted to and fro, but Suga’s legs held fast, not buckling as he thought they would. Still, he held out his arms, just in case he needed the balance.

Dai stepped up to him, turning and offering his back to Suga. The man accepted and placed a tentative hand onto the beast’s shoulders, using them as support. His first step was wobbly, but as he took more, he found that his legs did not feel as weak as they had when he had been lying down. Still he walked slowly and he had to pause to make sure he did step into the spilled champagne. He looked over his shoulder, trying to see how much of a mess he had made and frowned at the sight behind him.

The champagne was all around the bed, like the bottle had rolled, and his blankets were at the foot of the bed, partially in the arc of liquid. It looked almost like the blanket was continuing the path of the champagne. The bottle was between the blanket and the bed, shattered and the shards were grouped together oddly. Like someone had started to sweep them up and got distracted halfway through. 

Perhaps, though, the strangest part of the mess was the cluster of black feathers that were on the opposite side of the arc from the bed. 

Suga looked down to his companion with a frown. “Dai, I told you before, the crows can't come in the house. I don't want them getting trapped inside.”

Dai looked up at him, his ears tilting back for a moment before they pricked back up and he gave a dog smile, his tongue lolling out of his mouth. Suga shook his head lightly and began to shuffle along again, tangling his fingers into Dai’s fur. Warmth traveled from the beast, up through Suga’s arm, making him feel a little sturdier with each step.

As they got to the kitchen, Suga felt like he no longer had to hold onto Dai to keep balance, but kept clutching at his fur anyways. He wondered, sometimes, if Dai ever minded how tightly Suga held onto him. He never seemed to protest or pull away when the man clung onto him. More often he pushed back into Suga’s grip.

Maybe the dog liked being touched as much as Suga enjoyed petting him. 

However, he was forced to let go of Dai so they he could cook something. The beast shook his large head once released, then went to lay by the bay window, as he always did when Suga cooked. He was polite enough to not plop right in the middle of the floor where Suga could constantly trip over him. 

Coffee was his first priority, then making something for Dai to eat. If Suga had slept all day, and the dog had stayed with him the entire time, then the poor beast must have been hungry. He was more important to feed than Suga was, after all Suga could cook for himself. 

Though the man did stuff a cracker into his mouth as he pulled out the chicken and vegetables from the refrigerator. He set everything onto the counter, then got the rice cooker going so that it would be done the same time as the chicken. He had learned that if he put the chicken into the oven it came out less greasy, which Suga supposed was overall better from Dai in the long run. Not that the dog cared much. He just wanted the food. 

Suga laid out the chicken and vegetables onto a cooking pan and placed it into the oven to cook, before stepping back and looking around the kitchen. He really did not want to put the effort in to cook for himself. If he was honest, he kind of wanted to just have some more crackers and flop back down into bed, but he knew he needed to eat something real. Being lazy about eating had gotten him into the mess of feeling so awful in the first place.

He dug through the pantry, quietly cursing himself for trying to be a responsible adult and not buying anything he could just heat up and eat. Why had he decided to try to cook things? To his luck, but slight dismay, at the very back of the pantry was one of the cups of instant noodles he had brought for his first night in the cabin. He quickly pulled it out and began to heat up water to pour into it. 

Dai lifted his head up and angled his ears back as he watched Suga slurp at the noodles. The man pointedly ignored his gaze, refusing to be judged by the dog. He was allowed to be a bit lazy. He finished it quickly, then spent the rest of the wait drinking a cup of coffee and staring out the window. 

His mind, of course, drifted to his novel and how close he is to finishing it. He felt a tad bit more awake, less wanting to flop into bed, but he wasn’t quite sure if he was in the mind frame to write. He had already wasted most of the day sleeping and the night before drinking, so it really didn’t matter if he wanted to write or not. He needed to. He had to find a way to churn out words, reward himself with crackers or a gummy every hundred words he wrote, or something like that. He needed his cushion days for editing, not for writing. 

Suga knew what he needed to write, had it all outlined in his head, it was just a matter of finding the right words. And well, if he couldn’t, he’d just have to get something down and fix it in the editing. 

The rice cooker beeped and Suga turned to the oven to pull the chicken and vegetables out, smiling to himself at how well the food turned out. He fetched Dai’s bowl, being slow about it to allow time for the food to cool down some, then mixed all of it together, rice included, with a fork. He knew if he just left the chicken bits on top, Dai would eat all of them first then give him sad eyes that he wasn’t given more meat. All the articles Suga had read had told him to give the dog a healthy mix of meat, grain, and vegetable, though to Suga that didn’t make much sense. Dai had big sharp teeth, perfect for ripping things apart, didn’t it mean he should be eat only meat?

But the dog seemed to enjoy whatever Suga gave him, so for now it was all okay. 

Suga moved to set the bowl on the ground and Dai was there waiting for it before it touched the floor, his tail wagging all the while. The man pat at the beast’s back as he dug into his meal, then began to clean up the mess he had made, not wanting to leave himself something to regret later. 

As Suga washed off the sheet tray he had used to bake the chicken, the cabin walls began to shake. The windows rattled and the floor quaked beneath him enough that he feared he'd lose his footing. Suga grabbed on tightly to the counter, debating if the shaking was strong enough that he needed to find cover, but it was over before he could even think to move his legs. 

Suga frowned and didn't let go of the counter, just in case the shaking started again, if the shaking had just been a foreshock. 

He looked down to Dai, wanting to make sure the dog hadn't been spooked by the sudden earthquake. He wasn't. The beast’s ears were back and he was looking out the bay window, his amber eyes focused intently on something. Suga followed his gaze and saw one of the crows that hung around the cabin landing on the railing of the balcony. The bird cried out at them and flapped its large wings, appearing rather upset. 

Before Suga could react, even begin to wonder what might have been wrong, Dai was rushing forward and nosing at the handle for the sliding glass door. He had it pushed open before Suga could take a step forward. 

Dai was outside and leaping from the balcony in the blink of an eye. Suga scrambled to run after him, squeezing through the open sliding door, and staring with a slack jaw as Dai disappeared into the woods. 

The crow cawed, loud and echoing, then took off from its perch, flying in the same direction Dai had run. 

“Dai!” Suga called out, leaning into the railing of the balcony. “Dai! Come back!”

Suga didn't understand what was going on. Why had Dai just run off? He had never done such a thing before. Suga knew he was capable of opening up sliding doors, he had seen it when he had not gotten up fast enough to let the beast outside, but Dai had always come back inside.

Maybe he was getting to safety? Couldn't animals sense earthquakes or something? But would he have run off without Suga? The dog was always so caring, so he highly doubted he'd just leave him behind. 

Perhaps something was wrong? Maybe the other crow was in trouble? The bird had seemed distressed. 

Suga hesitated, leaning against the balcony railing a moment before pushing off and turning to go back inside. He rushed straight for the front door and grabbed his boots, then as he hurried back to the balcony, he stopped in the kitchen to grab the flashlight he had bought. He was at least going to be somewhat responsible while running out into the woods during sunset. 

He clicked on the device as soon as he stepped onto the balcony again and shone it onto the lawn. It didn’t help much, there was still enough light in the sky to see by, but he knew as soon it would be dark, and the remaining light probably didn’t get through the thick canopy of the forest anyways. 

From where Suga was standing, he couldn’t see any marks in the grass to see where Dai had run off to. He had a vague idea of the direction, the beast had definitely gone towards the left after leaping from the balcony, but that didn’t tell Suga much. Perhaps when he was one the ground, he would actually see paw prints. 

With the thought in mind, he descended the ramp and was glad he had decided to run back to get shoes. The grass and earth under his feet seemed to be damp, like it had lightly rained while Suga had been asleep. He didn’t doubt that to be the case, the weather in the mountains was always changing. 

As he rounded the house to the area of the lawn in front of the bay door by the kitchen, Suga found himself frowning. Even up close, there were no signs that a great beast had landed on the grass at a full sprint. Everything was pristine, not even a blade of grass bent to show where Dai had landed. 

Suga raised the beam from the flashlight from the lawn to the treeline, hoping to see some fur caught on a branch or a broken twig to show him where to go. He saw nothing, but he didn’t feel deterred. He wasn’t going to just let Dai disappear into the forest alone. If something was truly wrong, Suga wanted to help. He pressed forward, walking through the lawn and post the tree line. 

After the first few meters, the trees quickly became denser. With many of them he could stand between two and touch the trunks of two without having to extend his arms all the way. They seemed to have grown in clusters, with heavy vegetation between them. The underbrush was easy enough to push out of the way, giving away easily to the slightest of touches. 

He had been right in his assumption that the fast fading sunlight couldn’t break through the canopy and he had to turn his flashlight to the ground to even be able to see where he was stepping. The trees became large shadows surrounding him, looming and ever present. 

Suga knew, that on some level, he should have been frightened. It was human instinct, wasn’t it, to be nervous when walking through dark woods, not knowing what lay in front of him, what was waiting in the shadows. One wrong turn and he could very easily get lost, with no guiding stars visible to lead him back home. But he felt almost at peace as he walked between the trees. 

The air smelled of damp earth and moss, a scent Suga had always enjoyed. It made him feel grounded and almost calmed him. In the darkness, as the moon rose unseen somewhere on the horizon, the forest came to life around him. Crickets and tree bugs began to chirp and call out to one another and in the distance, Suga heard the soft cry of an owl. Above him, wind rustled the leaves. 

Suga thought the atmosphere was enjoyable, even if he was growing concerned he had found no sign of Dai. 

He kept on his straight path as much as he could, weaving between trees only when necessary. He decided, if he didn’t come across the dog soon, he would turn back and return to the cabin. He thought about calling out but that human instinct that seemed to not fear the forest told him to stay quiet. He knew there were no major predators to attract, but disturbing the peace of the forest seemed wrong. 

Suga was brought from his musings but the snapping of twigs a few meters in front of him. The silver haired man came to a stop and listened, waiting to see if it was a creature or some other natural sound the forest made. For all he knew, the trees around him might creak and groan like an old house. 

There was another snap, then rustling. Suga kept his flash light pointed down, not wanting to draw attention to himself and frighten the animal, but in its glow he could see the underbrush moving, parting as whatever the creature was moved towards him. 

A figure appeared in the shadows, standing just above the underbrush, around the same height as Suga, but bulkier. The man realized, with a blink of the eye, that it was a deer. Or perhaps a fawn, if he was remembering the word correctly. He vaguely recalled that it was deer that had yet to reach maturity that had spots on them. It had something he had looked up for a short story. But the creature couldn’t have been too young; it had a pair of barely there horns coming from between its ears. 

The deer stopped in its tracks and looked at Suga and he wished he had brought his phone with him. The deer was beautiful, a line of white spots cutting across its forehead diagonally. The animal twitched its ears at Suga after studying him a long moment, then took a cautious step back. 

The deer faltered and its hind leg gave out on it. Suga watched with wide eyes as the deer crumbled into the underbrush. The man moved forward quickly, bringing up his light to see where the creature had fallen. 

He found it easily enough and his breath caught in his throat. 

Much like Dai the first time Suga had met him, the deer had slashes along its flank. They weren’t nearly as deep as the ones Dai had had, and they had already stopped bleeding, but Suga still winced in sympathy. The wounds looked painful, but they seemed to be nothing in comparison to the metal device clamped around the deer’s hoof. 

It looked like a bear trap that Suga had seen in older movies and cartoons, complete with a dangling chain, but in a much smaller scale. It barely fit around the deer’s ankle. The blood around the device was fresh and still oozing freely and Suga assumed the poor creature must have been trapped recently, despite the fact the metal looked well rusted. 

Suga took another step forward and the deer’s head snapped up. The creature glared at him before flaring its nostrils and jerking its head, like it was threatening to gauge Suga with its horns. The man held up his hands defensively.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Suga said as softly as he could, “but I’d like to get that thing off your leg. You probably can’t walk very well with it on and it must cut in more with every step.”

The deer tilted its head down, showing its horns off, before turning its head pointedly away from Suga. The man licked his lips then moved forward cautiously, not wanting to make any sudden movements. 

Kneeling in the underbrush was difficult, he couldn’t just squish down everything like the deer had. An oversized leaf ended up resting on his shoulder. 

Now that he was closer to the trap, Suga could see a little switch that looked like it would release the teeth snagged around the deer. However, the mechanism looked rusted and like it would be difficult to push down with just one hand. 

As Suga brought the flashlight up to his mouth to hold it in his teeth the ground shook beneath them. It was a low rumble, only lasting a breath, but the suddenness of it seemed to spook the deer. The creature scrambled to get up again without trying to weight onto its hind leg. 

Panicking just slightly, Suga dropped the flashlight, reaching out and placing his hands on the deer’s side, careful to not touch its wounds. “It's okay! It’s okay, it is just an aftershock!” 

The deer looked at him, half on its front knees trying to get up, and blinked slowly at the silver haired man. It turned its head slowly to look at where Suga was touching him and after a tense moment, lowered itself back to the ground. 

“Good deer,” Suga said soothingly, rubbing a thumb along its coarse fur to try and calm it. “It’ll be okay. Just stay still while I get this off you.”

After the deer settled, Suga ghosted his fingers down the creature’s flank, avoiding the wounds, and leg until they reached the bear trap. Even though the angle the flashlight was lying at didn’t give him the illumination, he didn’t want to move to adjust it in fear of breaking his connection with the deer. Slowly, he moved his hands to rest on the mechanism to release the device, then glanced over to the deer, who was watching him intensely. 

“I don’t know if it will hurt or not,” Suga told it, “But I’m going to push down on the count of three, okay?” The deer angled it's ears towards Suga and the man took that as a sign of understanding. “One, two,three!” 

He pushed down onto the trap and when it didn't budge at all, he pressed harder. Slowly, it began to give in and the jaws owned with squeaks of the hinges. The deer managed to wait until the metal was no longer touching its fur to yank its foot out of the trap. Suga let go of the mechanism and the jaws snapped shut.

The deer leaned over Suga to inspect its leg, ears twitching with assumed annoyance. The man looked down at the wound with a frown. It was bloody and uneven, but luckily, seemed shallow enough. It hadn't gone deep enough to hit a vein. 

It probably still needed to be wrapped, but Suga hadn't brought any bandages. Maybe he could use a strip of his pajamas? 

He dropped his hand to his leg and began to tug the bottom of pants out of his boot, fully intending to rip up the garment. 

Behind him, on the nearest tree, a frog suddenly croaked. 

The deer sprung up to its feet like it had never been injured, knocking Suga over onto his back, and took off into the darkness. The man laid there for a few moments, blinking up at the canopy as he regained the breath he had lost by being so forcefully pushed back. He hauled himself back into standing with the help of a sturdy looking shrub, scooping up his flashlight along the way.

The frog croaked again and Suga turned, raising his light and shining it on the tree. Right at eye level, a shiny little amphibian clung to the tree. The little creature twisted its upper body to face the sudden light. It gave an annoyed low cry before launching off the tree and into the darkness. 

Suga frowned at the where the frog had been, slightly annoyed it couldn't have waited another minute before croaking. The deer would be long gone and Suga doubted he would be able to find it again and convince it to let him bandage its wound.

With a slightly put out sigh, Suga turned back to face the underbrush. His lips quickly pulled tightly into a thin line as he realized he didn't know which was he had come from. The forest looked the same in all directions; looming figures in the dark with no individuality to give him hints on the right direction. 

He was effectively lost. 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He could do this, he could figure his way back. It would be easy.

He was on a mountain, so if the path he chose lead him higher, Suga knew he was going the wrong way. If he descended the mountain, the village was at the bottom, surrounded by fields, and he would be fine.   
Trying to not go around the mountain would be the problem.

Suga ran a foot along the ground, hoping for a hint of a slope, but he found nothing to indicate which way he should go. 

How long had he even walked for? He didn't even know, or else he could have timed himself, going so many minutes in a direction to see if it was the right one.

No, his spacing out had left him in a bad patch of luck, and he hadn't even brought his phone along with him. It was probably still sitting on the bedside table. He really needed to get some sort of case for it so he could attach it to his pants so he wouldn't run off without it. 

GPS could have saved him a whole lot of trouble. 

Suga turned in a circle, trying to decide the next way to go. Nothing stood out to him as familiar so he took a chance and just began walking whatever way he was facing after counting to five.

He pushed through the underbrush, hoping he would see his own footprints. All he saw was fallen leaves and twigs. 

Suga kept walking, hoping he was going down the mountain despite the fact he felt like he was on even ground. 

After a long few minutes of weaving through trees, another sound joined in the song of cricket chirps and rustling leaves; the dull gurgling of flowing water. He paused a moment to listen to it, trying to determine if he was going towards it or if it was off to his side somewhere. It sounded like it was coming from in front of him. 

When he started walking again, his footsteps were a bit quicker. Water flowed down a mountain, so if he followed the creek of whatever was ahead of him, he’d find his way to the base of the mountain. 

Moonlight began to trickle through the canopy of leaves, illuminating the trees and showing that they were thinning out. The underbrush had become less dense as well and Suga no longer had to push broad leaves out of his way as he walked. 

The river wasn't very wide or deep, but it was enough to cut a vein across the mountainside and break up the thick canopy above him. There was about a meter between trees where the leaves didn't overlap and Suga could see a sliver of the night sky. He felt his lips part in wonder at the sheer magnitude of stars littering the sky. The sky had been overcast whenever he had been outside after sunset and he hadn't realized how little light pollution there was in the mountain before then. 

When he got back to the cabin, Suga would make it a point to stargaze with Dai. He could even download an app to show him all the constellations.

He just had to make it back to the cabin. 

Suga lowered his eyes from the stars down to the river as he moved closer to it, and as he did, he noticed soft whisps of steam rising up from the surface. He knew the mountain had natural hot springs on it, like the one on the lawn of the cabin, but he had never imagined there would be an entire river of it. 

He knelt down when he got to the edge of it and dipped his fingers into the clear water. It was warm enough to make him shiver at the sudden temperature change, but it wasn’t hot enough to burn him. It would be perfect to soak in. 

He watched the water flowing around his fingers for a few moment, noting that the pace was leisurely enough it would push on him if he tried to wade through it, but it was definitely flowing to his right. Which meant that was the way to the bottom of the mountain, he supposed. 

Suga stood back up, wiping his fingers on his pants, and began to follow the water downstream. 

The gurgling of the water, accompanied by the chirping of crickets, and the fact he wasn’t in the shadows of the looming trees set him at ease. He could see the sky and he knew which way he was going; he would be fine. 

The river slowly weaved its way down the mountainside, and after about fifteen minutes of walking, the scenery around him changed just slightly. The smattering of trees along the bank of the river arced away from the water’s edge, and in the center of the arc sat a strange looking purple lump. It looked to Suga like a large porous rock, going about to his hips and the size of a loveseat. It had thick, dark vines weaving through the pores, with dull white rocks around its base. 

Suga frowned at the object as he grow closer to it. The violet rock shined in the moonlight, almost glittering, but the vines looked slimy and like they had sludge on them. He noticed that there seemed to be smaller, paler vines coming from the base and wrapping around the white stones. They didn’t look as gross as their larger counterparts. 

He wondered why there were no trees close to the rock. Perhaps the rock extended underground and that was why trees couldn't grow; there wasn't enough spoil for the roots to take hold. It made sense, he was sure that was a thing.

As he began to pass the rock formation, Suga was struck with the sudden aroma of freshly brewed coffee. It was alluring, a comforting warmth in the chill of the night. 

He hadn't realized how cold he was until that moment. 

Suga paused in front of large purple rock, turning to stare at it. The smell of the coffee was clearly wafting from outcrop. He didn't understand; as far as he was aware coffee didn't grow wildly in Japan, and if it did it wouldn't smell like it had just been roasted.

He took a few steps towards it, confused, and reached out. The porous rock glittered under his fingers and it was surprisingly smooth. It was like someone had taken a sander to it and had polished it like it was going to turn it into a kitchen counter. He kind of wanted to stick his arm into one of the holes to see if it was as smooth on the inside as well. The only thing that kept him from doing so was the thick slimy vines weaving through the holes. He couldn't see where the vines were coming from and he figured that must have meant the plant, whatever it was, must have been nesting inside the rock. Something that didn't need soil to grow, and smelled intensely of coffee. 

Suga ran his fingers along the edge of one empty pores, wondering what type of rock it was. It was oddly pretty, with it's purple hue and strange shape. Perhaps he could follow the river back up and take pictures of it with his phone. He was sure he could incorporate it into a story some how. Not the one he was working on, he was almost done with it, wrapping up the final leg of the novel. He couldn't go adding a new element so late.

And it wasn't the story for rock to be appearing in. Maybe his next novel, whatever that would be. 

“I've never seen someone so oblivious to the fact they are being eaten.”

Suga was jerked from his from his thoughts and he half turned, looking for the sudden voice. He saw no one, no one around the small clearing or along the tree line. Had the voice been in his head, too wrapped up in his own imagination? It had happened before, but usually when he had worked himself to the point of exhaustion.

“Nope, over here, lil’ fishie.”

The voice had come from behind him, towards the river, and Suga spun around to face. He only got so far before something roughly tugged on his right leg and he was sent falling to the ground. He landed roughly on his side, slamming his arm into the ground and scraping it as he did. He scrambled to sit back up, pain radiating up his side,and turned to see what had grabbed onto him. His eyes widened.

Three of the pale purple vines at base of the outcrop had weaved around his boot and one of those had disappeared up his pant leg. Blood, his blood, was dripping down the half covered vine. With a sharp intake of breath, Suga began to try to tug his foot away from where it had been captured, but the vines did not give. Instead they tightened on around his boot and he felt something curl around his calf. 

“Let go of me!” He yelled at the plant. He dug his fingers into the dirt behind him, then leaned back slightly onto his arms so he could use all of his weight to kick at the vines with his left foot. He angled it so his heel was stomping against the vine that had gone up his pant leg, and his effort paid off after a few hard blows. His bootcut into the flesh of the vine and they all recoiled from him.

Suga scrambled back and away from the plant, going towards the river. 

Amused laughter came from behind him and Suga rolled onto his side so he could see where it was coming from. 

At the edge of the clearing, there was a man, with wild bright red hair sitting in the steaming river. Suga could only see from his chest up, so he assumed that water was deeper where the man was, or maybe the shore line became steeper than the shallow waters Suga had seen. 

Suga swallowed thickly, staring at the laughing man. He had not been there when Suga had entered the clearing. Had he? No, his red hair would have definitely stood out among the muted colors of the forest. Unless he had been reclining in the water, enjoying the natural hot springs, out of view. 

But why the hell was he there in the first place? Suga had been under the impression people from the town didn’t venture into the woods. Maybe he was closer to the bottom of the mountain than he had thought, and the man hadn’t travelled that far into the forest. Or he was simply braver than the other people Suga had talked to. 

The sun hadn’t set that long ago, it wasn’t unreasonable for someone to come out to soak. 

The man folded his arms along the shore and rested his chin on top of them. He looked over Suga with downturned eyes, then the corners of his lips turned up into what Suga assumed was meant to be a smile. The silver haired man was reminded of all the artwork he had seen of a fox smiling. It was slightly creepy, but also oddly attractive. 

“You should probably crawl away from that thing while you still can,” the man said his smile still in place. He seemed far too amused by the situation. He wiggled his index and middle fingers, miming someone walking. “Before your legs stop working.” He stilled his fingers suddenly, spreading them out for dramatic effect, then dropping his hand back to the ground. 

Suga’s eyes widened as he processed the words. “What do you mean?” He asked, though he did start moving closer to the river, and the strange man.

“It is poisonous.” The red haired man said, his voice lilting. “The little lavender tentacles have a paralytic in them. Once you can’t move,” he wiggled his fingers at Suga again, keeping his hand on the ground though. “The big ones eat~ you~ up~.” The last three words had been sung in varying keys, making the idea almost seem funny instead of terrifying. 

“What the hell is that thing?” Suga asked as he got closer to the water’s edge. He could see the flow picked up before tumbling over a small waterfall, that looked about a little more than half a meter high. The man was sitting right against it, the steaming water spilling over his sides and back. Everything below his ribs was obscured by the churning and bubbles of the water in the pool under the waterfall. 

“Don’t know,” The man hummed, tilting his head to rest on his forearms. “I call him Mister Mushroom Monster.”

“Mushroom monster?” 

Suga came to a stop about a meter away from the man, eying his a bit cautiously. He could see the appeal of wanting to sit under the waterfall, but so close to such a dangerous thing? It didn’t seem wise. 

Suga looked back over his shoulder at the outcrop. It was sitting innocently, like the vines hadn’t moved at all, glistening in the moonlight. 

“Do your legs feel tingly yet?” The man asked from the water, his voice dropping into something low that made Suga shiver. He looked from the strange rock down to his legs. They had felt fine before, despite what the man had said, but now that he had brought it up, they did feel strange. Almost like he could feel exactly how heavy they were. 

The man tsked and Suga turned his head up to look at him. He was pale, almost as pale as Suga was, and the way the moonlight was shining onto him and reflecting off the water, he looked like he was glowing. Water droplets glistened on his shoulders and Suga’s eyes were drawn to the muscles there. 

It had been a long time since Suga had seen someone shirtless in person, and by what Suga could see of the man’s arms and back, he looked like he was the type to take care of his body. 

But it was extremely rude for Suga to oogle a stranger, and he averted his eyes. He heard the man chuckle and it was as musical as his way of talking.

Suga wondered if he was blushing. His face felt warm like he was blushing. 

“Looks like it is in your system.” The red haired man said after he finished laughing at Suga, his voice full of amusement. “You should probably get it out.”

“Get it out?” Suga repeated. The man nodded, then sat up properly and arched his back, stretching out. Suga’s eyes darted to how the muscles in the man’s back moved for just a moment before he looked away again in shame. 

“Come here.” 

Suga glanced back and it felt like his heart stopped in his chest for just a moment. The man was giving him what Suga could only describe as a half lidded ‘come hither’ look while crooking his index finger towards himself. The man’s chest was as sculpted as his back and Suga could see the start of cut abs before they disappeared into the steam. 

“I’ll do it for you.” The red haired man said, his voice low again. Suga shivered again, his spine tingling pleasantly, and began to crawl towards the man while he still had use of his legs, not at all put off by the idea of getting closer to the man.

“Do what?” 

“You have to suck the poison out, little fish. Don’t you know anything?” Suga didn’t balk at the strange nickname. He tried to imagine how in the world the man was going to get the poison out of his body and his mind conjured up an image from an old movie; a man sucking on his hand after a snake had bit him there. 

Suga was definitely blushing. 

He stopped crawling when he was right in front of the man, their hands almost touching. His downturned eyes were a dark red and Suga wondered if he was wearing contacts. The color suited him though, and Suga found his lips curling up into a shy smile. 

The man reached up and gently pulled Suga’s right leg towards him. He didn’t fight it, allowing himself to be moved around like a doll until his leg was in front of the man and bent at the knee. Despite what Suga would guess would be an urgent matter, the man took his time to neatly roll up Suga’s pant leg and expose the cut. It was small, about the length of his little finger, but it was still bleeding freely. The red haired man tsked again, looking over the wound. 

“Have you done this before?” Suga asked, his mouth feeling strangely dry as the man cupped the back of his calf. 

“Yup.” The man said, popping the ‘p’. “Silly little fish get caught all the time and I help them. It's easy peasy.” The man flashed a bright smile up to Suga and the silver haired man knew he was now at least as red as a tomato. Or the other man’s hair. 

The man in the river ran his thumb soothingly over Suga’s calf before he lowered his mouth down to the wound. He paused just before contact, and looked up at Suga through his lashes. His heart started to pound in his chest, the sight on the man's lips so close to his skin attractive. 

“You can look away, if you want,” the man said, his voice deep and low again, his hot breath hitting Suga’s cold skin. All of Suga tingled at how seductive it sounded and he found himself obeying the suggestion, despite the fact that he was curious. He turned his face away and closed his eyes. 

A hot mouth pressed against the wound and began to suckle on it. Suga gasped at the sensation, followed by the tiniest of moans. He quickly clamped his hand over his mouth, silently praying so other sounds came out. He had to bite down on his bottom lip when he felt the man’s tongue press against the wound. It didn’t sting or hurt in any way, which was surprisingly. Perhaps his leg had just become numb? But he could feel the man sucking on him and it felt oddly pleasant.

After what felt like so long, but was likely less than a minute, the man pulled his lips away from Suga’s leg. He kept his hand where it had been, though, and began to yet again rub soothing circles into Suga’s skin. 

“There.” The man said softly. Suga finally pried his eyes open and looked to him, his hand dropping from his mouth with a soft gasp. 

The man’s lips were shiny with spit and slightly swollen and he was looking at Suga with half lidded and hungry looking eyes. The man licked at his lovely lips and Suga saw a hint of a pointed tooth. 

The silver haired man wanted to pry open his mouth and see if all his teeth were pointy. It was a strange fashion he had seen more than once. 

The grip on his leg tightened and Suga realized with a start his hand had lifted on its own and he was almost touching the other man's face. The man gave him a lazy smirk. 

“Want to tell me your name, little fish?” The man hummed, leaning forward into Suga’s hand. His skin was warm and Suga pushed his fingers into the man's cheek.

“Sugawara,” Suga breathed out, heart pounding in his chest so fast he thought it might pop out. 

“Sugawara, Sugawara, Suga, like sugar.” The man chuckled, then tugged on Suga’s leg, drawing it closer then ducking down to press a kiss above the wound. Suga bit his lip, heat building in his face again. “I bet you taste just as sweet.”

“I...have been told I'm quite spicy.” Suga ventured, tilting the man’s head up to look at him. He wanted to see him more, inspect his face and memorize it. He wanted to touch it and possibly, just possibly, taste the man's lips.

“I like spicy.” The man said with a grin. “And you, my pretty little fish, may call me Tendou.” 

“Tendou.” Suga repeated, testing the name on his lips. He greatly enjoyed it.

“Yes, my little fish, you should know who is going to eat you up,” Tendou purred. Suga felt his cheeks turn red and his thumb brushed the edges of the man’s lip. 

“That is a bold claim.” Suga whispered, feeling bold himself. He had never in his life flirted like this, he had only ever flirted a handful of times, and shyly over coffee. He had just met this strange man in the forest and he wanted to be devoured by him in the next few minutes. 

“A true one, though. Would you like to come into the water, little fish?” 

Suga looked up, his heart pounding in his ears, and slowly started to nod. 

Yes, he very much wanted to get into the water with Tendou. He wanted to feel Tendou’s hands on him, running over him, and his hot tongue pushing into him. He wanted it so very much.

Tendou pulled back, retreating from the shore just enough that Suga couldn't reach him anymore. The silver haired man whined at the loss, suddenly feeling so cold.

His hand dropped to the edge of his pajamas and he began to push them down. He could slip out of them easily, then tug off his sweater. He didn't care about his boots, they wouldn't get in the way of anything. 

He just wanted Tendou. To be touched by him. To be eaten. 

A low rumble cut across the air, jerking Suga away from his thoughts, away from his want. Tendou’s alluring smile had contorted into a scowl. His anger grew as the rumbling grew louder. 

“Seriously?” The red haired man hissed, his eyes narrowing into a glare at something behind Suga.

Suga turned and blinked in surprise.

Dai was coming from between the trees, his head lowered, ears back, and hackles raised. The large dog stepped forward slowly, snarling and growling so loudly Suga could feel it vibrating inside of him. 

He felt no fear, though. The vibrating left a warm feeling inside of him, washing out the cold he had been left in. 

He knew Dai would never hurt him. 

Tendou scowled at the large dog, “Fuck off, you over grown poodle.”

Dai barked, loud as thunder and shaking Suga to the core. The beast stepped up beside the silver haired man and he reached out, gripping onto the bristling fur. He looked between Dai and Tendou with a frown, not understanding the animosity between them. The man had been so nice, helping Suga, he would have thought Dai would have approved.

But Dai looked furious, ready to lunge at Tendou at any given second. 

Suga tightened his grip on the beast’s fur, remembering suddenly the reason why he had been walking along the river. He was trying to get back to the cabin, after having gotten lost in the forest. After having run after Dai. 

He hadn't been walking around looking for a lay.

“Ah, I’m sorry, Tendou, but I should probably return to where I’m staying.” Suga said, pushing himself into standing. 

The other man canted his head, looking Suga up and down for a long moment, before saying in a low voice, “Are you sure, my little fish?” 

Suga almost stepped forward, tempted to resume what they had been doing despite knowing he shouldn't, but Dai gave a vicious snarl, ripping the thought from his mind. 

“I’m sure.”

Tendou pouted and sunk more into the water. Flecks of gold and red briefly shone in the water between the bubbles and Suga had the curious thought of fish being able to live in the steaming river. He forced his attention back to Dai and gave the dog a smile. 

“Let’s go, boy. Good bye, Tendou, and thank you.” Suga said as he turned to walk back into the dense forest where Dai had come from. Behind him there was annoyed grumbling then a splash. The silver haired man glanced over his shoulder, but Tendou was gone; probably having submerged himself under the waterfall to kill any sexual desire he had worked up. 

Suga was surprised his own arousal had disappeared so quickly, given how wanting he had been. 

As they passed through the treeline, Suga realized he had lost his flashlight, probably when he had tripped, and that he could barely see beyond his nose. He tightened his grip on Dai’s fur, trusting the beast to guide him in the right direction and not lead him into a tree. 

They walked slowly, weaving through the trees, and Suga’s mind drifted, since he couldn't see anything to focus on. 

Was he really so desperate that he'd go after the first person he met that showed him any interest? Was he that lonely? He hadn't been with anyone in months, but before that, Suga hadn't really been with anyone period. A few kisses, a few touches, but he had been willing to jump right into the water with that man. 

Without even knowing his name.

Suga had never felt so consumed by lust before. It was frightening when he thought back on it, to lose himself completely. 

He tightened his grip on Dai and looked down to where he thought the beast was. “Thank you. For coming for me.” He heard Dai snort in response and Suga found himself smiling. Of course Dai would have come after him; Suga probably would have saved them both a lot of trouble if he had simply had not been so stubborn and had called out for the dog the moment he had realized he was lost. Dai’s large ears would have heard his cry echoing throughout the forest, and then Suga could have been with him the entire time, not traipsing around in the dark. 

“When we get back home,” Suga promised, looking back up into the darkness and giving Dai’s fur a small squeeze, “I’m giving you three treats. Since I never got around to giving you the first two.” 

Dai gave a low, but clearly happy bark that warmed Suga’s heart and made him remember why the beast deserved such treats.

Dai was a very good dog and friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the quality and lateness of this chapter. I have been having trouble focusing and writing and the story is unfortunately suffering for it.


	5. Lemongrass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Truths are revealed.

He was done. He was actually done. 

Suga stared down at his laptop in confusion and slight horror because how could he be done already? He had only been writing for two hours. There was no way he could be done. He hesitantly reached out and scrolled up the document to make sure he hadn't accidentally skipped a scene or something, but everything flowed smoothly. There was the dramatic climax that went right into the sudden drop of an ending. There was no neat wrap up, but how could there be when the main character realized they had been infected and lost their mind with the urge to kill?

He was satisfied with it, despite the fact it all needed massive editing and Kiyoko’s long critiques about any plot holes he had forgotten to wrap up. Well, beyond the whole ‘what the hell’ is happening. Sometimes things were more frightening when the reader has no explanation. The characters had been in the dark and Suga had never been a fan of narrators giving away details for things the characters would never know. 

Suga looked over the final chapter once more, then turned in his seat to look at Dai, who had been sunbathing on the balcony. “I think I'm done,” he called out softly. The large dog lifted his head and blinked at Suga before yawning widely and flopping back down.

“Hey! Don't give me that!” He accused before pouting, “Let me savor my moment before I jump into editing it. This is a big deal. I should celebrate.” Dai’s eyes narrowed into what was definitely a glare. “Not like that. I do not have a death wish. But I could...I don't know. Get ice cream! That's it. I'm going to get ice cream when I go down to town. I need to get you more chicken anyways.”

Dai rolled onto his back, as if exposing his belly to the warm sun, and pointedly ignored Suga. The silver haired man huffed and crossed his arms, trying to pout but it wouldn't stay. His lips kept quirking up; he was too excited to keep from smiling. How couldn't he be? He had finally finished the actual writing. He still had to edit and it would be frustrating as hell and it would be weeks of pointing out his flaws to himself, but the story was finished. He just had to fine tune it. 

It was worth celebrating. 

Suga reached out with his foot and scratched at Dai’s belly, earning lazy wags of his tail. “Ice cream and a good meal and maybe a soak in that hot spring before diving head first into the next part. That will be my night.” He gave Dai a final pat before standing up and closing his laptop. “I'm going to take longer than I did last time, okay?” He voiced to the beast at his feet. He wasn't quite sure what he wanted to actually cook or pick up and figured he'd end up browsing about before making a decision.

Dai responded with a twitch of his ears, then rolled onto his side he hadn't sunned yet. Suga smiled at the dog fondly before slipping back into the house to put his things away and to change.

He wondered if Dai minded Suga didn't bring him down into town. The only reason he didn't was that he only went to places that had food and bringing a dog into that environment would be unsanitary. He wouldn't want to buy food from a store that let dogs roam around their fresh produce.

Dai probably enjoyed the break from Suga’s constant rambling and touching. 

Once he was dressed, he did a quick survey of the kitchen, making a mental list of what he needed to pick up besides chicken and ice cream. He made the decision, as he realized he needed quite a bit more than he expected, to walk to town and take a cab back. That way he wouldn't have to carry everything back up the mountain, and the ice cream wouldn't start to melt.

Pleased with his own brilliance, Suga went back to the balcony, smiling at Dai, who had gone back to napping happily in the sun. The silver haired man scritched the dog’s ear and whispered a goodbye to him before turning to leave the house. 

The mid morning sun was warm on his shoulders as Suga began his trek down the mountain and it was easy enough for him to start to zone out. His thoughts were fleeting and he had no real focus of thought as he walked. He day dreamed of what sort of ice cream Abe’s shop would have and whether or not he should buy cones to go with his treat. He thought about what he needed to clean at the house and whether or not he needed to purchase cleaner and tried to remember if he had packed his swim shorts. 

It was strange, how relaxed he had become simply from having finished writing. It was like a massive weight had been taken off of his shoulders and the anxiety over the project that had wrapped around his chest had loosened. It was all self imposed, he had made the choice to become an author, but it was something he gladly subjected himself to. He loved to create and the soul satisfying feeling he got when completing a project was well worth all of the overwhelming pressure it caused him. As much as he complained about writing, to himself and his friends and on social media, he truly did love and enjoy it.

He'd give himself the day, a day to celebrate and relax, before he would pick up his courage and delve into the process of editing. It had been so long since he had even looked at the first chapter of his novel, he didn't even remember the first line any more. Not that it mattered much more, but he had remembered agonizing over those first few words, trying to create the feeling he had been going for. The tone of a work was as important to him as the words. But all of that pressure, all of the questioning if that was the direction he wanted to go in, or if he was overthinking things and making his story too complicated was gone. Now it was all catching mistakes until he sent it to Kiyoko for her thoughts.

A daunting task, but not an impossible one.

The main road of the village was bustling as he came down the mountain. It seemed like everyone not of working age was out and socializing, going from one store the small village had to offer to the next. Laughter and chatter floated through the air and Suga found it infectious, his own lips turning up into a small smile as he worked his way through the crowd. He took care to not get to close to anyone, steering himself away from any groups larger than two people as he tried to get to the convenience store. 

He frowned as he saw how jammed packed it was. Suga wasn't even aware enough people lived in the area to crowd the streets and stores. Perhaps there was some sort of event going on in town that he was unaware of. It was entirely possible, given he had looked up exactly nothing about the town except local urban legends. Those had been far more interesting than looking at the social calendar. 

But everyone seemed to be in casual wear, Suga had not spotted one kimono or yukata, so he doubted it was a festival of any sorts. There also hadn't been any banners or signs around to show celebration.

Maybe it was just a nice day out and for some reason the schools were not in session. Suga wasn't exactly sure what day it was, so as far as he knew, it could have been the weekend. 

Everyone was out and about, and now he was as well. He had shopping to do and he wasn't going to let a crowd dampen his want of celebration.

Suga went over his mental list again, determined to try to remember everything, then took a breath and plunged into the crowd. He weaved himself through the people who were just standing about, not even shopping, and went to the first aisle that held what he wanted. As he stuffed broth into his bag, he felt eyes on him and glanced over his shoulder.

A pair of girls, maybe high school age, were watching him from the end of the aisle. They burst into giggles when they got caught staring and ducked around the corner. Suga knit his brows, confused by the action, turn turned back to the shelf. 

As he moved on to the next item, he noticed the girls still watching him and giggling.

“You're popular, Writer-san.”

Suga jumped at the sudden voice behind him and whirled around. Part of him expected Abe, the shop keeper, since she was the only one who called him ‘Writer-san’, but the person grinning at him was very much not her. It was a man, a little taller than himself, with bleached blonde hair, slicked back with an undercut, and more piercings and tattoos than Suga thought was acceptable out of the big cities. The man looked Suga up and down, not at all hiding he was checking him out, the grin on his lips becoming more and more devious. 

“Ah?” Was Suga’s brilliant response as he took a step away from the man.

“They followed you into the store. They think you're cute,” the man clarified, leaving more into Suga’s personal space. “Do you dye your hair, Writer-san?”

Suga blinked at the sudden question, slightly thrown off. “Ah, no. It's natural.”

“It's not dyed!” The man called out, turning to where the girls were hiding behind the end of the aisle. They shrieked at being addressed and Suga heard heavy footfalls as they ran away. The man with the undercut threw his head back and laughed, clearly amused by the reaction.

“Yuuji, stop harassing the customers!” A voice called out from the front of the shop and Suga recognized it as Abe. 

“Sorry, mom!” The man, Yuuji, called back, flashing a grin to Suga as he did. The silver haired man blinked a few times as he processed the information. 

“You’re Abe-san’s son?” 

Yuuji nodded and offered his hand out to Suga. “Yup, and she’s told me all about you, Writer-san.”

Suga shook the man’s hand and gave a tentative smile. “You can call me Sugawara, and I hope it has been good things.” He really did not want to make a bad impression on the townspeople. 

Yuuji laughed again and Suga caught a glint of metal in the man’s mouth. He had wanted a tongue piercing at some point, but Oikawa had refused to go with him to get it. He wondered if it would be rude to ask how much it had hurt, or if there was a parlor in town. With as many piercings and tattoos as Yuuji had, Suga guessed there had to be one nearby.

“She said you had balls of steel for staying at the Sawamura place.”

“It really isn’t that bad,” Suga mumbled, feeling a blush creep up his cheeks. Yuuji waved his hand dismissively. 

“You couldn’t pay me enough to spend the night in that place. I went into the forest once after dark, you know, stupid kid shit.” The man wrinkled his nose and shook his head. “I get why people avoid that place now. It really is creepy as hell.” 

“What happened?” Suga asked, curiosity getting the better of his politeness. 

Yuuji laughed, and Suga realized it wasn't a bad sound, and held out his hand again, gesturing towards Suga’s bag. “Let me shop with you and I’ll tell you the story. That way it looks like I’m actually helping a customer.”

Suga quickly decided there was no harm in it and handed over his shopping tote to Yuuji. The man let it rest in the crook of his elbow, then waved his hand, silently telling Suga to continue his shopping. Obeying, Suga grabbed a bag of rice and placed it into the bag.

“So it was on a dare. There is a little shrine somewhere in there, and there is a story about a kid who went in there a few decades ago, like 1930s era kid or something, and there was a storm so he hid out in the shrine to wait it out, right? Well, the storm kept going and going and he couldn’t leave, and he started to, you know, like succumb to the elements or whatever the saying is.” Suga nodded along, listening intensely and forgetting about shopping. Yuuji didn’t seem to care and kept talking.

“And so like, this forest spirit came one night when the kid was near death and offered to save him in exchange for something, no one knows what, the story doesn’t say, but the kid agreed to it. And the spirit put him to sleep, and the legend goes that the boy’s body is still at the shrine.”

“And naturally, you were meant to go find him?” Suga asked, unable to keep the small smile off his face. He hadn't read that legend in his research. It was an interesting one, not so far fetched it was unbelievable, and just strange enough to be memorable.

Yuuji laughed. “Exactly. Find the shrine, take a picture, and come back. And by the way, you are supposed to be shopping,while I talk. That was the deal.”

Suga huffed, but turned to walk down the aisle anyways, weaving through people and planning on getting more vegetables. The other man followed him.

“So of course I go in all cocky, and about half way up the trail, my flashlight died, and I got all turned around. I was trying to find my way back and couldn't, even though I've lived here all my life. And then just. Growling right behind me, like a dog or something. And I ran. And then it was in front of me, and then beside me, then behind me again.” Yuuji shook his head. “It went on all night. It was like it was trying to force me to go somewhere. Everytime I turned it changed where it was,” Yuuji paused, and Suga looked over his shoulder, frowning at the scrunched up face the other man was making.

After a moment, he continued on, “I thought it was my friends at first, playing a prank, but when I finally managed to get out of the woods, they were all at the police station, organizing a search party. I'd been gone something like seven or eight hours, but to me it only felt like an hour.” Yuuji shrugged. “And now every time I go near them, my sense of time feels all off. And that is it, that is my grand story.”

Suga gave the other man a small smile, genuinely interested in the story and wanting to hear more, but not wanting to push. “It's enough to make anyone want to stay away.” He tilted his head in thought, and added, “Your mom always offers to have you drive me back up the mountain.” 

Yuuji stopped behind him as he browsed the different radishes. Suga glanced over his shoulder at the man, slightly amused by the thrown off look. The man recovered quickly before smirking at Suga and looking him up and down, overdramatically checking him out. 

“I’d drive up the mountain for you.” 

Suga blinked at the man before bringing his hand up to his mouth to cover his laugh. The line was ridiculous, and they both knew it, and Yuuji began to crack up as well. 

It felt different from when he had flirted with the man in the stream. This felt innocent and non sexual at all, more of what Suga was used to, more playful and over the top. He was sure his cheeks were turning bright red, even though all of it was completely silly. He didn’t feel dirty or embarrassed by it, save that it was in the middle of a convenience store, with dozens of people around. 

“Okay, that was bad.” Yuuji huffed out after a minute of laughing. Suga nodded in agreement. “Let me try again?” Yuuji’s smile changed into something more daring, more confident than amused. “How about over drinks?” 

Suga ducked his head, his hand still hiding his smile. He considered it for a just a moment. It would be nice to go out, to drink and innocently flirt, and he really did want to pick Yuuji’s brain more about local legends and see if he could learn more about his experience in the forest. But Suga had come out to the woods to get away from exactly those types of distractions. He had work to do and he was determined to actually get it done. 

“As nice as that sounds, I came here to get away from going out. It is bad for my writing.” Suga said slowly, hoping he wasn’t stumbling over his words and didn't sound too rude. Yuuji had gone out on a limb and Suga was turning him down. However, the man shrugged, still grinning. 

“Then I’ll just have to work it in as we shop. I’ve got plenty of lines. If we go by the milk, I’ve got a pretty good one for that situation.” 

“A pick up line about milk?” 

“Yes, if you want to hear it, we’ve got to go that way.” 

Suga took a moment to think, then turned and headed towards the dairy aisle, Yuuji happily following him. 

+++

“You didn’t have to growl at him,” Suga chided as he settled down at the coffee table with two bowls of ice cream. Dai looked up at him from where he was lounging in front of the fireplace and angled his ears back, before snorting. “I know you are protective, but you about gave the poor boy a heart attack.”

Dai’s ear cocked to the side before he picked himself up and trotted over to the table to sit beside Suga. The silver haired man picked up the spoon from the smaller of the two bowls, scooped up a small bit of ice cream, and held it out to Dai.

“Yuuji-san said dog’s can’t have ice cream, but he showed me this. It’s almond milk or something.” Dai sniffed at the treat before tentatively licking at it. His tail quickly began to wag back and forth, smacking Suga in the back, and the beast made quick work of what was on the spoon. One finished he gave Suga a pointed look, one the man knew meant Dai wanted more food. He pulled the smaller bowl closer to the edge of the table and Dai stuck his muzzle into the bowl and began licking up the ice cream. Suga chuckled, then pulled his own bowl closer and took up a spoonful.

“He was nice,” he said, before slurping up a bit of his treat. He could feel Dai glare at him, judging him. “He told me some of the legends about the forest, stuff I didn’t read online. And it was kind of cool, how they built off each other. There was one, about a boy who goes into the forest and ends up forever sleeping at a shrine after making a deal with a forest spirit, and that one goes into that shrine and the boy’s body being protected by another forest spirit, and nothing is able to go near the shrine except flowers. And that turned into a territory dispute between other forest creatures.” Suga smiled as he dipped his spoon back into his ice cream. “It’s all completely fascinating. I mean, I know there are legends that interconnect, but that is at like, a national level? Like the Greeks or Viking myths. But this is all so, like, local. Everything in is this forest.” Suga gave a bit of a dramatic sigh, “It’d make a great series of short stories, gathering all those legends into writing.”

He glanced over to Dai, who had stopped eating his ice cream and was staring at Suga with an intense gaze, his ears perked up, showing he was listening. There was something in the beast’s eyes, an uncertainty or weariness, that made Suga reach out and rub at his neck.

“Don’t worry, boy, I like this place too much to subject it to that. If I did write something like that, it’d be under a penname, with all the names and locations changed to make sure no one could link it back to here. The forest doesn’t need people crawling through it, trying to find all its ghosts. It’s disrespectful.” He paused, then smiled, “Though, that itself would make a good story itself. Someone going out to write a book about local legends and - ack, no Dai, I’m sorry!”

Dai huffed against Suga’s cheek, then licked him once again for good measure before pulling back. The silver haired man rubbed the slobber off his face with his sleeve, unable to help the grin on his face.

“Okay, okay, no stories, short or otherwise, directly inspired by the forest. I promise.” 

Dai leaned heavily against Suga for a moment, almost knocking him over, before turning back to his ice cream. Suga watched the beast finish off his bowl, then reached out to run his fingers through the thick fur there. Slowly, he leaned in, so the tables were turned, and he was resting a majority of his weight on Dai. The dog didn't seem to mind.

He laid his head on Dai’s shoulder and breathed out a sigh. Even when the beast finished his treat, and he was free to move away, Dai stayed at the table, letting Suga drape over him. 

Suga knew he had his ice cream on the table, still waiting to be finished, and he had been craving it all day, but he found himself not wanting to sit back up. He wanted to stay leaned against Dai, maybe close his eyes and take a quick nap. He wasn’t tired, but he felt the urge to doze, his body starting to feel heavy. He pushed his nose into the fur in front of him and inhaled; Dai smelled like the forest. He smelled like dirt and moss and just something wild, nothing like the gross wet dog smell people often talked about. 

A thought suddenly occurred to him. Dai was from the forest, had been there for years, according to the older women from town. Maybe he had been there for many years, long enough to have been around when Yuuji had gone into the forest on his dare. Suga couldn’t think of anything else in the forest that growled. 

“Hey, boy,” Suga mumbled. He felt Dai shift under him,and knew the beast was listening to him. “You’ve been around the forest for a long time, yes?” There was a thump of a tail in response. “Did you ever chase people out of the forest before? You’re such a good dog, I can’t see you doing it maliciously. But if you did, you would do it to protect the people...or the little things in the forest, right?” 

Dai ducked his head and pulled away from Suga, standing up to take a few steps back. Suga turned to watch him, a smile pulling on his lips at how genuinely happy Dai looked. The beast was wagging his tail, his ears perked up, and he was grinning. He slumped down so he looked like he was bowing, his front legs down on the floor with his behind in the air, then he boofed, gentle but loud, the sound resonating through Suga’s chest. 

The silver haired man threw back his head and laughed at the display. He knew what it was; Dai was intelligent enough to understand his questions, he had proven it time and time again. It was a confirmation. Dai had been the one to chase Yuuji out of the forest, which, if Suga was honest, made the fact Dai had growled at him rather amusing. The poor man had thought he was chased around by a monster, when it had just been Dai, probably trying to protect him.

Suga held out his arms and Dai barreled into him, knocking him flat onto his back and covering his face and neck with eager kisses. Suga returned the love, scratching at the beast’s neck and shoulders. 

After few moments of affection, Dai pulled back, grinning down at Suga and thumping his tail against the table. He looked down at the human with what Suga would swear was a mischievous glint in his eye before turning just slightly. It clicked in Suga’s head what was about to happen just as Dai lunged forward. Suga tried to grab at him, but his arms only hit air. Dai had his front paws on the table and his muzzle in Suga’s ice cream bowl before the man could even sit up.

Suga groaned and flopped back down. “You're going to have a stomach ache and it's going to be all your fault.” He rested his hand over his stomach. “You are just lucky I had a bite already. I really wanted it but now I'm like ‘bleh’,” he said, emphasizing it by sticking his tongue out. “Being back inside made me lazy.” 

Dai finished the ice cream and flopped down to lay beside Suga, pushing his head against the hand on the man's stomach, demanding pets. Suga rolled his eyes and complied, digging his fingers into the meat of the beast’s ear. “So spoiled,” he teased. “Are you going to get into the hot spring with me?” it had been another thing he had wanted to do to celebrate, besides get ice cream. He had been at the cabin almost a week and still had yet to indulge himself with that. 

Dai answered by rolling onto his side and pushing more into Suga’s hand, tail thunking against the floor lazily. 

“I do have the ability to pet you outside, you know.” He pointed out, before gently shoving Dai’s head off of him. “Come on, silly boy, let's go get a towel.” He pushed himself up into standing while Dai flopped back down. Suga smiled down at the dog as they both stretched at the same time.

He turned to go back to the bedroom after cracking his back, debating internally what to bring outside with him.

“Since this is private property, do you think I can get away with not wearing swim trunks?” He called out as he gathered towels, “I mean, hot springs are meant to be enjoyed nude. And I'm too lazy to dig through my suitcase.”

A loud bark was the reply, but Suga couldn't tell if it was affirmative or negative. He had started to learn Dai’s body language, but the tone of his barks and boofs were a mystery without a visual. Suga assumed the beast was agreeing with him. After all, if anyone decided to spy on him, Dai could just chase them off.

And he wasn't worth watching, anyways.

Suga went into the en suite and stripped down to nothing. Once nude, he stepped into the small shower and gave himself a very quick rub down. Just because the spring was outside did not mean he wanted to add his own filth to it. 

Once clean, he wrapped a towel loosely around his waist, grabbed up his extra towels and his phone, and headed towards the sliding glass door. It was already pushed open, and Dai was waiting for him on the balcony, one of his rope toys hanging out of his mouth. He rapidly wagged his tail at the sight of Suga, and the man gave him a pat on the head.

“Ready?”

Dai grinned up at him from around his toy and Suga decided that was a yes. When Dai kept standing there, staring up at him, Suga took the initiative and started towards the ramp that lead down to the lawn. He heard Dai follow behind him.

The hot spring was almost in the middle of the small lawn, between the cabin and the trees. There were a fair bit of leaves in the water, and after Suga laid out one towel, he knelt down and took his time picking out each one. Once he had cleared the surface of the water, he stood back up and smiled at Dai, who had laid himself on the towel.

“Are you sure you don't want to join me? It's big enough for the both of us.”

The spring was small, a little over a square meter, but Suga was sure they could both for comfortably. Dai glared at Suga before pointedly chewing on the rope. The silver haired man chuckled at the antics.

“Your loss.”

With that, he dropped his towel and stepped down into the water. Despite the small size of the spring, it was rather deep, but luckily there was a small ledge to help him down. The ledge was also perfect for sitting on, far enough down that the water hit just below his collarbone. Suga stretched out his legs, pushing his feet into the side of the spring, then slumped down slightly to rest his head on the stones that surrounded the edge. 

Suga inhaled deeply through his nose, then slowly exhaled through his mouth, feeling his entire body relax. The water was hot, enough that he was sure he'd be pink or red when he got out, but it wasn't scalding. It was the perfect temperature for a hot spring. 

He didn't realize how sore his muscles and joints were until he was soaking them. He mildly wondered if his tenseness had to do with his wanting to lay down. Maybe all the walking he was doing up and down the mountain was taking its toll. Back home, everything he needed to get to was within a few blocks of each other, and if it was further he had the options of the bus or train. He definitely needed to be in better shape if he was going to be bringing Dai back with him.

Maybe he could take up doing yoga again. He had done yoga when he was trapped in hospitals, to help be able to move around. He hated being confined to a bed all day.

Slowly, he opened his eyes, which he hadn’t realized he had closed, and looked up at the sky. 

The weather was pleasant. The temperature was mild, enough for a light jacket, and the sky was a crisp blue, with drawn out white clouds spattered throughout. Suga knew how clear the sky was at night and he knew he would have to come back out and soak again after twilight to see all the stars. Maybe he could even bring out a glass of wine and tablet, and use the app to look up all the constellations he would see. It would be lovely. He could already imagine hearing the crickets chirping.

He turned his head at a leisurely pace and smiled to Dai, who was watching him, his head resting on his massive paws. 

“This is nice,” Suga drawled out. The beast leaned forward and snuffled at his temple, giving him a quick lick before settling back in his original position. 

“Why didn’t I do this sooner? Hot baths are nice, but there is something special about a hot spring.” Dai twitched an ear in response and Suga stuck his tongue out at the dog. “Okay, I know it is a reward. But I need to reward myself more. What do the Americans say? Treat yourself? I should do that more instead of slaving away in front of my laptop.” He gave a dramatic sigh. “I think I’m going to need glasses soon. My eyesight is getting to be horrid. So much squinting.”

Dai huffed at him. 

“Hush, I’d look cute in glasses. Oikawa looks good in his when he decides to actually wear them. Oh, or I could get contacts?” Suga paused, thinking a moment before scrunching up his nose. “No, I’d forget to take them out with how often I fall asleep watching shows. I’m sure that is bad for you. Glasses it is then.” 

He reached up and used his fingers to make little circles around his eyes. “What do you think, boy? Large round ones? Or I could go the whole, creepy goth aesthetic and get black cat eye ones. And pierce the tops of my ears, and my tongue, and look like I might accidentally summon a demon. Enough of my wardrobe is black.” Though that was by coincidence, the things he liked just happen to be one the darker end of the clothes spectrum. He thought of all the witchy aesthetics he had seen online and gasped. “I could get a big black sunhat.” 

Dai reached out and placed his paw on Suga’s cheek, as if trying to shut him up. It only made Suga laugh. “Okay, I agree, the sunhat is too much.”

They lapsed into silence, with Dai eventually pulling his paw back so he could lay on it, but after a few moments, the beast crawled forehead and buried his nose into Suga’s hair. The man smiled and leaned into it, letting his eyes close again. 

It didn’t take long for Suga to begin to unwind and the drowsiness that had been lingering over his head to fully settle in. The heat of the water worked into his bones, making his entire being, body and mind, feel like jelly. Dai gently breathing into his ear didn’t help much at all, acting almost like a lullaby. 

Suga knew it was dangerous to fall asleep in a hot spring, for many a reason, but he told himself he wouldn’t sleep. Even as his eyes grew heavier and heavier, he swore his was just resting them, and in the next moment he would sit up properly and pick up his phone to go through his newsfeeds. He even imagined it so clearly, as he began to drift in and out of consciousness, that his mind tricked him into thinking he had already started to do it. His fingers twitched underwater, grasping for a device that wasn’t there, swiping at an invisible screen. He dreamed it over and over, a simple little scenario that was real enough, as he sunk deeper and deeper into sleep. 

He was rudely awakened by a sharp jab to his shoulder. 

Suga’s eyes fluttered open, struggling to remain so, and he rolled his head to see what had looked at him. Beady eyes stared back at him, surrounded by sleek black feathers. It was as close to him as it ever had been, right up against his shoulder. The crow, upon noticing Suga was waking, cawed loudly in his face.

That had Suga jumping and coming more to his senses. He scrambled to sit up properly.

“What the...oh hell, I fell asleep.” He reached up and scrubbed at his face with pruney hands. “Dai, why did -” he stopped himself as he turned to address the beast. Dai was in his own deep sleep, rolled onto his side with his chest rising and falling steadily. Suga reached out and ran his fingers through dense fur with a soft smile. Dai’s ear twitched, but he remained asleep. A true show of trust, Suga thought. 

He turned back to the crow. “How long was I asleep for? It's still bright out.” 

The bird ruffled its feathers, then turned to look at the blanket behind Suga. The silver haired man turned to follow the gaze and snorted at seeing his phone sitting there. He huffed, then dried his hand on the blanket, before tapping on the screen. 

He had come outside less than an hour ago. It made him feel better, knowing he hadn't been left to sit for hours at the risk of drowning. But even after soaking, he still felt groggy and sore.

“Thank you,” he mumbled to the crow before turning and pulling himself out of the water. He reached for the towel that had once been around his waist and dried himself off. All of his moving around finally seemed to stir Dai, who lifted his head with a large yawn. The dog blinked blearily before standing up and shaking himself awake as Suga covered himself again. 

“Seems we both needed a nap,” Suga commented with his own yawn. Dai stretched out his hind leg, like he was agreeing. 

Suga scrubbed at his face yet again, before ducking down to gather his things and heading back up to the cabin. Dai snuffled at the crow, earning a soft caw, before trotting after Suga. 

Once inside, the man wasted no time changing into warm clothes, piling on the layers. His bed cried out to him and Suga answered its siren call eagerly, flopping down onto the covers. Dai was up and beside him a moment later, nuzzling along his jaw. 

Suga turned his head and smiled groggily at Dai. The beast gave a whine low in his throat.

“It's okay, boy, just a nap. Then movies, then we tackle the beast.”

Dai huffed against his cheek, ears back.

“No, this is one of those treat yourself things. Let me nap, Dai. I never get to back home.”

The dog whined again, but Suga ignored him in favor of closing his eyes.

+++

Suga couldn’t stop shaking. 

He was barely awake, eyes not even open, and he couldn't stop shaking. He felt like he was freezing, even bundled up under his blankets and many layers of clothing. Even his teeth were chattering and all he wanted to do was turn his face into his pillow and absorb all of its warmth.

But even that felt like too much effort.

He didn’t want to move. His joints and muscles ached and he was utterly exhausted even though all he had just been napping. The room was dark, so he knew he had slept for a few hours. 

His mind was groggy and slow; he was having trouble keeping his muted trains of thought and kept finding himself drifting back to sleep despite his shaking and wanting to stay awake. He knew what was happening when he was aware and it made his heart heavy with dread. 

He was sick. 

He was sick and he was so, very, very fucked. 

In all of his trips down to the town he had never once thought about picking up any sort of medicine. Not that it would have done him much good, but it would have been good to at least just have. But he knew, with how he was when he had woken up, there would be no way he could make it down the mountain without collapsing. He felt like he could barely sit up. 

Maybe if he prayed hard enough to gods he didn’t believe in, his body, for once in his life, would defend itself against an infection. 

He didn’t want to have to go to the hospital. He wanted to sit and edit his novel and be happy. He had been so happy the past few days. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been so at peace. Maybe back in Tokyo, when they had been looking at apartments together. 

They had both been fond of the one with enough room on the balcony to have a garden box. 

“No,” Suga croaked, curling in on himself. He refused to be sick and sad. He was going to miserable enough being ill, he didn’t need to drag feelings into it as well. 

He forced his mind away from that place and back to his current problems. 

How had he gotten sick in the first place? It had become second nature for him to be cautious. Well, besides his new tendency to run out into the pouring rain and walking through the forest, but he would have gotten sick sooner if that had been the case. 

He thought of the poisonous rock and vibes he had encountered and dismissed it. It was supposed to have paralyzed him, the man had said. Not give him a fever a day later.

Had someone he had interacted with in town been sick? He couldn’t remember seeing any of the signs. No one has been wearing a face mask in the crowds and there was no way he could have gotten ill so fast, even with his horrid immune system. He must have picked out up a few days ago, somehow. 

Suga pulled the blankets tight around him. It didn’t matter how he had gotten sick; what mattered was that he was sick, in a cabin twenty minutes from town, with no medicine, and alone. He was the definition of screwed. 

His mother was going to kill him. 

The door to the bedroom creaked open and a moment later the bed sunk with new weight. Suga struggled to roll over, then stared up at the dog looking down at him in concern. 

He wasn’t completely alone. He had Dai. 

Suga stuck a hand out from under the blankets and the beast understood, laying himself down slowly so Suga could curl into him. He pressed his face into Dai’s fur, trying to absorb the warmth the large dog gave off.

He felt more than heard Dai whimper, then the dog was nuzzling at his hair. Suga knew he was asking what was wrong. 

“Sick,” he whispered into his friend. “It’s not good, Dai. Can’t be sick. Not here.” 

Dai whined, then licked at what he could reach of Suga’s cheek. It was warm, but it didn’t spread down his body like it usually did. It just left his cheek feeling wet. 

Suga groaned and curled away from the kisses. “No, Dai. Not now. Just want to sleep more. Will you stay with me?” It felt like such a silly thing to ask, but Suga didn’t want to be left alone. A familiar fear was creeping into his stomach and Dai at least being there made him feel somewhat safe. 

Dai always made him feel safe. 

Sometimes he forgot Dai was just a dog. He always made Suga laugh, he was a very good listener, and very expressive with how he was feeling. They played and danced and Dai would always lay against him while Suga worked, never bothering him and just being a comforting presence. But he was a little shit at times and Suga absolutely loved him for it. 

He wondered if Dai would enjoy living in his apartment. It was much smaller than the cabin and he wouldn’t be able to go outside whenever he pleased but Suga didn’t want to be without him. Maybe he could find a bigger apartment. One close to a park where Dai could run around in grass while Suga sat at a bench and typed.

The thought made him smile, even if weakly. 

Something nudged at his shoulder and Suga lifted his head to see Dai pushing the pillow against him. Suga smiled more, then laid his head down on it. He pet at the dog’s fur a few moments before curling his fingers into it loosely. Dai shifted, lying around Suga and placing his muzzle against his silver hair. It made Suga feel protected; watched over. 

Dai wouldn’t let Suga succumb to being sick. He’d take care of him, even if he just was a dog. 

He drifted back to sleep, still feeling completely wretched, but not as scared as he had been.

Sometime later, but too soon for Suga’s liking, the shrill ringing of his phone woke him up. He groaned and pressed himself into Dai, trying to hide from the noise. It was loud and hurt his head and he wanted it to go away. 

Dai moved under him, stretching out, then the annoying ringing was dropped onto the pillow by his head. Suga pulled back so he could glare up at the dog.

“No,” he rasped, his throat dry and scratchy, but he was already reaching for his phone to see who was calling him. He scowled at the name, then pressed the accept button. “What?”

“Yoo-whoo~ Suga-chan. Did I wake you up? It is almost midday!” 

Suga winced at how cheery Oikawa sounded and curled himself back into Dai. “Yes, you did,” he mumbled, his throat protesting each word. 

“I know I'm not supposed to call you, but I wanted to tell you about our trip! So many exciting things happened! Iwa-nee-chan’s husband made a surprise visit, with a puppy! A proper puppy, too, not a wolf like someone I know.” Oikawa rambled on, oblivious to the fact Suga was two seconds from hanging up on him. 

“That sounds wonderful,” Suga grumbled, sounding the opposite of enthused. 

There was a long pause before, “Koushi, are you sick?”

Suga groaned. He shouldn’t have answered the phone. “No.”

“Don’t you lie to me,” Oikawa’s voice was laced with concern and it made guilt pool in Suga’s stomach. “You sound awful and you don't sleep past noon like ever. You spend the rest of the day guilt tripping yourself it you do.” There was another pause and the sounds of shuffling, then Oikawa returned, his voice sharp and commanding, “What's the address of the cabin?”

Suga almost did, it was on the tip of his tongue before he realized exactly what his best friend was planning. “No. You aren’t coming here.”

Oikawa huffed into his ear. “You’re sick, Koushi, and you are alone. You said you were twenty minutes away from town when riding a bike. I’ve seen you sick, you can’t do that to yourself. Someone needs to come make sure you are okay, or you need to go somewhere. It's too dangerous.”

“I’m not alone,” Suga mumbled, curling more against Dai. The beast nosed at his hair. 

“The dog you found in the woods and adopted doesn’t count!”

“He’s smart, he can -” 

“What is he going to do when you don’t wake up because your fever has gotten too high? How is a dog going to tell the emergency responders your medical history? You refuse to wear your bracelet! This is the exact reason I got it for you! How is a dog even going to call someone?! Is he going to howl?”

Suga shrunk in on himself. He didn’t mean to make Oikawa so upset. He could hear the worry in his friend's voice. Oikawa always tried to act like he didn't care, but Suga knew he cares too much. “Tooru….I’m across the country.”

“Like I give a damn about that! Tell me the address and we will be there by tonight. We are already on the road and Hajime doesn't care about speed limits anyways.”

“No.” Suga whispered, clutching onto Dai as he did. He didn’t want Oikawa and Iwaizumi to come. He didn’t want them to take care of him. He had come out to the cabin to work, to get away from everything. If they came, he wouldn’t be able to do that. He loved them, but he wanted them to stay away. He could care for himself; he was an adult. Just because his body had troubles didn’t mean he was fragile and needed to be treat like he was porcelain. He was stubborn about the fact, long ingrained from what his mother always told him. 

He knew his limits. If he was feeling sick, just shaky and achy, he would be okay. He had to tell himself that. 

Oikawa didn’t respond at first, and Suga thought maybe he had hung up, frustrated with how stubborn Suga was being. But when he finally spoke, his words were calm and serious. 

“If you do not tell me the address I will tell Kou-chan you are sick.”

The words, the threat, made Suga’s head spin. The way Oikawa oh so casually said His name. Too many emotions swirled in his stomach and Suga felt like he was going to throw up. His heart was beating too fast and his throat was closing up. Everything hurt. His eyes were stinging. None of it had to do with his being ill.

He threw his phone from the bed, not caring it hit the wall and clattered to the floor. He wanted it away from him; he didn’t want to hear Oikawa’s voice anymore. 

He buried his face into Dai’s shoulder and his body started to shake for a very different reason as a sob escaped his lips. 

How could Oikawa have said that to him? How could he have threatened that, knowing how Suga felt? Did he think it would have actually worked? 

All Oikawa had done was succeed in making Suga feel worse. Everything he had been holding inside since he had arrived the at the cabin, the pain he had been trying so hard to ignore and the ache in his heart, had come pouring out with one simple name. 

His body shook as he cried, with emotion and fever, and he clung tightly onto the warm body in front of him. 

Why did Oikawa have to that, make a threat like that? Why did he have to mention Bokuto? It hadn’t been fair, Suga had been trying so hard to not think about him and Oikawa had known that. It had been a low blow and his so called best friend knew it. 

It all began to replay in his head, the moment his heart had broken; those bright golden eyes filled with laughter, the way Bokuto’s smile had stayed for a moment as he had realized what had been said, the way he had grabbed Suga’s arm with such force it had actually left a bruise. 

He could almost hear the words in his mind. He didn’t want to. He never wanted to hear them again. They had hurt too much, they still hurt too much. Suga let go of Dai to grab at his own hair. 

“No, no, no,” He chanted, trying to tell his mind to stop. To stop reliving the moment in his head. 

Across the room his phone began to ring again, this time a cheery tune playing. 

Suga froze, not even daring to breath. 

He couldn’t. No. He hadn’t actually spoken to Bokuto since that night. They had only talked through emails and one very awkward skype conversation. Suga hadn’t been able to handle anything more and gone to lengths to avoid actually speaking or seeing him. 

“No,” He whispered, “Please, no.” 

The bed shifted and Suga’s head jerked up. He watched as Dai stepped off the bed and over to the phone on the ground. His breath caught in his chest, praying the dog would not bring the device over to him. 

Dai’s ears cocked forward, then he leaned down to sniff at the blaring phone. After a moment, he took one large paw and ran it over the screen. The ringing stopped. 

Dai looked up to the bed, to Suga, his tail starting to wag. The man held out his hand to the dog, tears still streaming down his face. He needed the beast back in the bed, needed to hold onto him and feel like someone was there for him. 

The phone started ringing again. 

Dai looked down at the device again before barking at it, the noise echoing through out the room and briefly drowning out the ringing. The dog pawed at the phone again, looking like he was trying to silence it but with no luck. 

There was a crunch, the ringing stopped, and Dai was backing quickly away from the phone all in a span of a second. Light was still coming from the screen, so Suga knew he hadn’t completely broken the device, and he wouldn’t be mad even if he did. Dai was just trying to help. 

Once again the happy tune started playing.

The dog angled his ears back, and Suga watched as he stooped, picked up the phone with his mouth, then left the room. The music got further and further away until Suga couldn’t hear it anymore. 

He returned a few moments later at a near run, climbing onto the bed and right into Suga’s open arms. The silver haired man hugged the dog tightly, and Dai leaned into it.

“Good boy,” Suga whispered, pressing his face into Dai’s fur as tears poured down his cheeks. “Such a good boy.” The dog rested his head on Suga’s shoulder, like he was hugging him back. Suga had no doubts that was exactly what Dai was doing. He gave a watery hiccup as he curled his hands into the dog’s fur.

“I can,” he started, his voice raspy and shaking, “take care of myself just fine. I’ve been doing it for years.” He didn’t know who he was talking to; Dai or himself. Was he trying to convince himself? “I’ve been sick before on my own. I just have to….I just have to be careful. I don’t need Tooru and Hajime to baby me.” He sniffed and pulled back from Dai to rub at his eyes. “My body isn’t completely useless. It knows what to do, it just has to work harder. It can do it. I can do it.” 

Dai licked at his face again and Suga weakly smiled. He reached up to pet at the dog’s cheek, heart beating hard at the way Dai leaned into his hand. 

“You’ll take care of me, won’t you?” 

Suga knew Dai wasn’t just a dog, like Oikawa had said. Dai was smart; he understood Suga’s words and was aware of very human things. He had silenced Suga’s phone, after all.

As if to prove Suga’s point, Dai nodded, actually properly nodded, into Suga’s hand.

“Thank you,” Suga whispered to him, feeling like the tears were finally stopping. 

He had Dai. He didn’t need Oikawa or _Him_ coming to take care of him. He didn’t need them. He would be okay.

Dai pushed forward, pressing his head against Suga’s chest. Suga didn’t resist, allowing himself to be guided back down into laying. The dog followed, lying beside him and keeping his head on Suga’s chest, looking up at him with soulful eyes. 

Suga gave him another tired smile, then rolled his head to the side. He tried to not think about the phone and how it was probably still ringing somewhere across the house. How long would it keep up? How many voicemails and texts would be left for him to delete later? Hundreds? 

It was a cruel thing to do, it wasn’t deserved, but Suga couldn’t handle it at the moment. Being sick was hard enough, he didn’t need to add that to his plate as well. 

He fell asleep with his heart feeling weak, yet heavy. 

+++

His lungs and throat were burning; each inhale was a struggle. His insides felt raw and dry and breathing through his nose was impossible. 

Everything hurt and he didn’t want to move, not now, not ever. 

But he was so thirsty. 

Suga wasn’t aware how long he laid there, eyes half open and wheezing as he tried to get precious air. Finally, it became all too much and he forced his legs to move, convinced they had been replaced with lead. 

He needed water.

Sitting up was a process. His arms kept giving out on him and his head was spinning, but he was finally able to push himself up and swing his legs over the side of the bed. He slumped forward, groaning with how his body did not want to support its own weight, but he stayed up. It was something. 

His hands were lifted out of his lap and Suga cracked open his eyes to see Dai wiggling between his legs, giving him something steady to hold onto. Suga grasped at his fur, barely able to hold it with how badly his fingers were shaking. 

Trying to stand was a mistake.

His knees gave out before he had fully extended his legs and he fell forward. Dai tried to catch him, and it worked for the most part; Suga crashed against the dog’s back, earning a strange sort of grunt, then slid down to the floor. Dai wasted no time, turning and pressing his large head into Suga’s shoulder and pushing him back so that he was leaning against the bed and not slumping down to the floor. 

“I’m sorry,” Suga rasped, his voice coming out broken and strained. He closed his eyes, unable to keep them open any longer. It was too hard. 

He felt a tongue on his cheek, then heavy breaths as Dai snuffled around his head and chest. 

“S’okay…” He whispered. He hadn’t hurt himself falling, except for knocking the wind out of him. He sat for a minute, trying to brace himself for getting up again but never being able to find the energy to do so. His hands and legs twitched uselessly. 

He heard Dai’s claws click on the floor as he left the room. Suga wanted to call out to him, tell him to come back, but he didn’t. He trusted the dog. Instead he sat there, chin touching his chest, struggling to breath.

He was such an idiot. He should have gotten himself water earlier, should have realized what would happen. Oikawa had known, and Suga had been too emotional, from being sick and everything else, to want to listen. 

Maybe he could still get to a hospital; call for someone to come get him. It would wound his pride but sleeping had only made things so much worse. 

He was groggy and weak and everything was a dull ache. All he wanted to do was go back to sleep and be warm. 

When Dai returned, something cold and wet was dropped into his lap. Suga opened his eyes to see a water bottle. His hands slowly clasped around it and he brought it to his stomach like he could absorb it that way.

“Thank you.” He whispered, closing his eyes again. “Dai...I need my phone. I can’t...can’t do this.” 

He needed help. He needed to go to the hospital. 

The beast left the room again, feet pounding against the floor as he ran. He returned only few moments later, pushing the device into Suga’s hands with a whine. 

Suga’s heart dropped into stomach when he looked at his phone. The screen was cracked, down the middle with a spiderweb of damage in the lower left corner, but he didn’t care about that. He cared about the fact the screen was black. No matter how many times he pushed at the power button, it remained dark.

His battery had ran out. 

The phone slipped from his hand and clattered to the floor. Everything began to spin as panic and fear swirled through him. His phone couldn’t be dead. He needed to call someone; the emergency responders or the hospital or Abe. He couldn’t stay at the cabin; not alone and without medicine. His body couldn’t do it.

His body was going to fail him again. 

It scared the hell out of him, making him start to hunch over. Monsters and aliens, serial killers and murderous clowns, being locked in a small space and pitch darkness, none of it scared him like his own body did. Turning against him, refusing to do what it was supposed it; his body wasn’t supposed to do that. His body was supposed to be able to fight off a simple cold.

Not give in and let itself be ravaged. 

Why couldn’t it be like his spirit, his soul? Strong and stubborn and not backing down from the world; that is how his mother described him. Why couldn’t his body match that? 

He didn’t know what to do and he was scared. He wanted to get back into bed and hide under the covers, pretend everything would be okay. That he wasn’t alone in the middle of the woods and that his body would somehow kick into high gear and fight off the infection he had. That there was someone there to wrap him up in their arms and tell him he was safe; that nothing would happen to him. To tell him stupid owl puns so he wouldn’t get so caught up in his mind.

Sobs shook his body and Suga started to fall forward. He landed against something soft and furry and he clung to Dai, the water bottle falling from his hands as he did so. He cried until he couldn’t anymore and slumped into the dog, struggling to breath even more. 

He hated all of it; he hated all of the emotions that had curled their way inside of him and had exploded at the worst opportune moments. He was even more exhausted and his eyes stung and ached along with the rest of his body. He seriously doubted he could even get up onto the bed. 

He leaned into Dai more, no longer able to support himself. His eyes wouldn’t open anymore and he just wanted to go into that sweet darkness. Then he wouldn’t have to think or feel and he could just be. Be asleep until whatever his body decided to do. 

Hopefully, it would not give up on him.

He heard distant whimpers and whines as his mind slowed to a stop.

+++

“Are you sure about this?” The voice was far away, unfamiliar. But soothing in its tone. 

“Yes. Now, please help me. I cannot remember how these things work.” Another voice; stronger but somehow even more soothing. It was deep and something about it that made Suga’s heart stutter. 

He was being moved, lifted and turned, then something warm was wrapped around him. He curled into it. He was so cold. When had he become cold? Maybe he had always been. He couldn’t really remember; everything was a hazy blur. He could barely process the words being said around him. 

“He looks too pale. And he’s warm. Very warm.” The first voice said.

“I know.” 

“What are you going to do? We can’t take him to the village.”

“I know.” 

There was a heavy sigh and the bed sagged with new weight. A hand, warm and gentle, pushed Suga’s hair from where it was sticking it his face. He tried to lean into the touch, but it pulled away from him before he managed to be able to move his head.

“We need a Healer. But Ennoshita is still away.” It was the second voice, closer now than before, right above Suga. He must have been the one to touch him. 

“It would take a day to get the message to him and a day for him to return.”

“That is far too long. He needs help now. I do not know if he will make it through the night. He is getting worse by the hour.” The voice sounded sad and there was a pressure on his arm, above the blankets he’d cocooned in. Like a hand had been laid on him.

“The Springs?” The first voice suggested

“Half a day’s travel by foot like this. Slower to carry him.” 

“Tendou?” 

That name sounded familiar, Suga knew it, and it sent a shiver up his spine. He couldn’t place it, though, or link a face to the name. 

There was a snarl, animalistic and dangerous, then the second voice was talking again. “I told him if he came near him again I would rip out his throat.”

“My Lord!” The first voice gasped, sounding scandalized.

“He was trying to eat him. He is clearly marked, is he not?” 

“He is, but, Daichi,” the name stirred something in Suga. Familiar. It sounded familiar. He knew that name, too. “You just can’t threaten to kill Tendou like that. It’s improper.” 

“That fresh water eel could survive losing his throat. Maybe he would be less mouthy that way.”

There was a snort of muffled laughter. 

Suga tried to pry his eyes open, to see who was with him. No one should be with him. Maybe he was dreaming, nothing felt real. He felt too hot and like he was floating. 

There was a fuzzy outline beside him, tan and black. Bright amber stood out among the blur of colors.

“Dai…” Suga managed to croak. Dai had amber eyes. Where was he? He wouldn’t let two strangers be near Suga like this. 

The warm hand cupped his face again and small, pleasant sparks went off along his cheek, giving pops of cool air against his too hot skin. 

“Shhh, shh, my Human. I am right here.” It was the second voice, the strong and strangely comforting one. It made him feel safe, even when he didn’t know who it belonged to. Suga managed this time to lean into the touch. “You will be okay. I promise it. I will take care of you.” 

“My Lord,” said the first voice, in almost a warning. Suga couldn’t see the figure who was talking.

“It is fine, Asahi. He has been in and out of sleep for hours. He will not remember this. He is too ill.” 

There was something gentle brushing against his cheek, a thumb maybe, and Suga pushed into it. It felt nice, solid, in his world of haze and aches and Suga found himself closing his eyes again. 

There was silence that felt like it stretched on forever before the first voice was speaking again. “Tanaka is gathering ingredients.”

“It will not be enough. He is too far.” The sadness was back in the voice and it made Suga’s heart want to cry out in pain as well. 

“My Lord…” Pity, there was so much pity in the words. “We will find a way to help him.” 

“I am going to give him Life.” The hand was pulling away from him just as a thump echoed throughout the room.

“What?! Daichi, you cannot do that! That is too much!” 

Suga didn’t understand. The voice sounded shocked and somewhat angry. He didn’t like it; he wanted the warm hand back and soothing words spoken above him, but speaking to ask for such seemed entirely impossible. 

“I can and I will,” the second voice said with determination. “I am going to ask the Trees. Watch him for me.” 

“My lord, are you out of your mind?” Then a pause, a realization. “You always planned to do this.” 

“There is no other solution.” 

“He is just a Human.”

“He is _my_ Human and I will protect him with everything I have.” 

Suga struggled to crack open his eyes again, but he inhaled sharply once he did manage to. 

A man was standing beside his bed, tall and broad, and completely nude. It was not a bad sight; he was all hard muscle and tanned skin that almost seemed to be glowing. He had a strong, but almost elegant jaw, with just a hint of stubble along it. He stood with no shame, back straight and shoulders squared. He looked regal. Beautiful. 

He was something Suga had most definitely dreamed up. Someone so perfect would never have been sitting on his bed moments earlier, declaring nonsense about Suga being his. No one like that would ever want him. 

The man looked down at Suga and his determined expression softened. Suga lost himself in amber eyes, unable to look away as the man reached for him, running fingers through his damp with sweat hair. 

“Sleep now, Sugawara Koushi, and when you wake, you will feel better. I swear it on my life.” The deep voice was hypnotizing and Suga did not resist what it told him. 

He closed his eyes and once more, the darkness started to take him. But he was not scared.

He trusted the stranger with amber eyes.

He would be alright.


	6. Brown Sugar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Explicit. 
> 
> Possess.
> 
> Cosmic.

Somewhere in the distance, birds were chirping. Soft mating and territorial calls that gently pulled Suga out from the land of sleep. He cracked open his eyes and was met the dark blue his pillow sheets, which while not normally interesting, confused him.

His mind was a fog, everything was blurry and he couldn’t really remember anything, but Suga had the distinct feeling he had fallen off the bed at some point. He had a vague memory of trying to stand up and his legs deciding to disobey him, but he didn’t know if it was a dream or had happened the night before or years ago. 

He was sick, he knew that much. His body ached and his throat burned, but he could breath through his nose. There was nothing clogging up his lungs, which was always the worst thing about being sick; besides the risk of dying each time. He was uncomfortably warm, but getting out from under the blankets he was under seemed like a horrible idea. The weight of them was nice, making him feel confined in the nicest of ways. His own little safe cocoon.

After a few minutes of laying there, Suga’s mind slowly began to offer up vague information; he remembered the hot spring, soaking in it and taking asleep. After that, things were still unclear. There was Oikawa’s voice, a rollercoaster of emotions, and a golden figure standing over him, promising him something. But all of it felt like a dream and he had difficulty believing any of it was real. 

He wouldn't doubt it, his mind came up with the strangest things when he was wrecked with fever. 

With a groan, Suga dragged his hand up from under the security of the blankets and plopped it on his forehead. He was sweaty and gross and hot, but he didn't feel too feverish.

Had his body somehow managed to fight off the cold or was it some horrid ‘things get slightly better before they all go to hell’ sort of deal?

He couldn't remember the last time to former had happened.

Missing part of his spleen meant his body could not produce antibodies, which meant he pretty much had no real immune system. 

For his body to be able to fight off the illness, the infection must have been very weak. 

Or he was incredibly lucky. 

Suga figured that since his fever addled mind could not clearly recall anything concrete from since he had gotten out of the hot spring, he must have been incredibly lucky. 

Suga dropped his hand from his face and slowly turned so his head was no longer buried into his pillow. He blinked blearily, eyes trying to focus in the sudden influx of light, and when they did, he was greeted with the sight of Dai. The large dog was curled up on the other half of the bed, looking to be in a deep slumber. His chest was steadily rising and falling, and even as Suga reached out for him and stroked at his neck, the beast didn't wake. 

Suga scratched at the dog's neck one more time before pulling his hand away. He didn't want to disturb Dai. He was more used to seeing Dai dozing, but if the dog was truly asleep, he probably needed it.

Movement in the corner of his eye caught Suga’s attention and he turned his head, mouth parting in slight shock. The two crows that were Dai’s friends were nestled into the end of the bed, in some sort of makeshift nest made of the nds of Suga’s blanket. 

The smaller crow was almost laid out, neck stretched out with his head resting on the edge of the blanket nest, while the larger was resting his beak against his own chest. Both seemed to be as asleep as Dai. 

They weren't supposed to be inside, Suga didn't want to risk them getting trapped or hurt, but he did not have the heart to wake them and shoo them out. 

They had watched over him.

Or it least it appeared that way.

It was more likely Dai had watched over him and they had come in to keep him company. Which still sort of counted, Suga supposed. 

But lovely and intelligent as Dai was, there were a fair few things the beast was incapable of doing and Suga’s stomach reminded him of it with a painful twange. He had no idea when the last time he ate was, or when he had last gotten a drink of water. His throat was raw and scratchy and his lips were cracked beyond a simple slather of lip balm.

With great effort, Suga rolled onto his other side so he could attempt to get up. His lips turned into a frown at what he saw on the bedside table.

His phone was innocently sitting, charging like Suga had been the one to put it there, surrounded by multiple water bottles that were in various states of fullness. He reached out for the device and tapped the screen. It remained black.

He tapped at it again and the screen still didn't respond. With a groan, Suga hauled himself up into sitting, leaning heavily back onto the pillows, then picked up his phone. His jaw dropped in horror.

The screen was cracked, a huge spider web of breaks over the bottom half of the screen. He desperately ran his fingers over the screen, trying to get it to light up, but nothing happened. 

He was starting to panic, worried his phone was completely dead and he'd lost everything on it, before noticing the small red light by the camera, signaling it was charging. His fingers jumped up to the power button and he held it down.

With a sharp beep his phone powered on and Suga gave the biggest sigh of relief. He wasn't necessarily addicted to his phone, but he had things on the device, pictures and memories, he did not want to lose. At least if the device turned on he could move everything to his cloud storage like he had always meant to do.

His lock screen finally appeared, then a moment later, the device began to vibrate violently on his hands. Suga dropped it in surprise and watched with wide eyes as the screen filled with notifications; missed calls, voicemails, messages from his email and his various social medias. It took almost ten seconds for his phone to stop alerting him to all the new content. 

Hesitantly, Suga reached for the device that had fallen into his lap. It took a few tries for him to get the screen to respond to open up his list of missed calls. His heart dropped when it finally did.

‘Bokuto Koutarou’ filled the screen over and over again, even as Suga scrolled down. The time stamps suggested he had been calling almost every hour for the past - Suga’s eyes widened and his lips parted in shock.

Three days. 

There was no way Suga had been so sick he couldn't remember the previous three days. There was absolutely no way he had completely lost three days. His phone had to be glitching, lying to him somehow.

The last date he remembered had been the twenty fourth, the day he had finally finished his first draft. He knew it had been the twenty fourth because he had planned out how many days he had left to edit. 

But his phone was telling him it was the twenty eighth.

Suga didn't know if he wanted to believe it.

He stared down at his screen, eyes focused on the name that had called him so many times, his heart starting to pound in his chest and his breath catching in his throat as his emotions began to surge. 

Why had He called so many times? Had something happened? 

Suga’s finger hovered over the call button, shaking slightly with the desire to press it, to call back. 

But he couldn't.

Instead he closed out of his phone log and opened up his email.

His heart pounded harder in his chest.

One hundred and ninety six. 

One hundred and ninety six new messages. 

His fingers shook as he scrolled through them, not opening any that came from an address he never had forgotten. He didn't want to read whatever He had sent over and over again. 

It hurt too much to even see his name and Suga was still trying to process he had been sleeping for three days. 

He kept scrolling, noting that Oikawa’s name appeared occasionally between His. 

A greyed out box, indicating it had been read already, caught his attention. It was from Kiyoko. After some difficulty, and a few frustrated shakes of his phone, he managed to open the message. He blinked down at it in confusion because the message she had sent had been replied to.

‘Sugawara, your ex has been calling me requesting I give him the address to the cabin, claiming you are sick. For you, such things cannot be taken lightly. Is he telling the truth?’

‘He is just worried. I am okay.’

The reply, while clearly from him because it was from his phone, was not his writing style at all. There were no emojis, nothing was shortened. It seemed incredibly formal.

He must have been extremely out of it when he replied.

Suga set the phone down onto his lap and closed his eyes. 

It explained all the calling, all the messages. 

He had known Suga was sick. 

He had been worried.

About him.

Had asked Kiyoko for the address to the cabin. 

Suga had no doubt in his mind if the man had gotten it, he would have flown out as soon as he could. He would have driven all night if a plane hadn't been available.

Bokuto was a good person like that. 

Suga doubled over, pressing his forehead to his knees, and his shoulders shook with sobs that he refused to let escape. He had cried so much over Him already, he didn't want to do it anymore, and especially not over the fact the man he had loved, still loved, so dearly still cared for him. Even when he didn't deserve it. 

Gods, he didn't deserve it.

He didn't want to cry. 

He took a deep, steadying breath, even though it burned his throat. But it was no different from everything else that hurt. He reached up and tangled his fingers into his hair, which was greasy and disgusting, and pulled at it. As he knew it would, it helped to ground him.

He was still sick.

Just because he felt better, because he was recovering from whatever, didn't mean he wasn't still ill. He needed to take care of himself or he would spiral downward again. He couldn't rely on his body to magically heal itself again. 

The moment he began to feel any worse, he was going to call a cab to take him to the nearest hospital.

He nodded to himself, the sudden movement making his head spin, but it just helped his resolve. He needed to focus on recovering, not the messages.

There was a gentle nudge to his arm and turned his head to the side. Dai was staring up at him, eyes hazy and looking as exhausted as Suga felt. He moved his hands so he could cup the beast’s cheeks and leaned down so their foreheads were pressed together. 

Dai’s tongue darted out and licked Suga’s chin. 

“Hey, boy…” the silver haired man whispered, a small smile coming to his lips despite the overwhelmingly negative emotions still swirling inside of him. “I’m sorry if I scared you.” Dai pushed against his head gently with a low whine. “I know, I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened, I don’t remember anything. Whatever it was must have hit me hard and fast.” He paused, then pulled back so he could look down at Dai properly. The dog looked up at him, eyes full of affection, and beat his tail lightly against the bed. 

“I should teach you what to do if that happens again. I’m not sure if I’m better or this is just a lull.” He dug his fingers into the meat of Dai’s cheek and the dog leaned into it. “It’s bad for me to get sick. My body can’t fight off infections on its own, not anymore.” Dai’s ears pricked forward in interest, clearly listening to Suga’s soft words. It encouraged him to talk more, even though his throat was protesting it. “I haven’t got a spleen anymore. That’s the part of your body that is sort of the center of your immune system. So when I get sick, my body had no real defense. I don’t even know how I’m better now.” He sighed deeply, then scratched at Dai more. “I’ll set up some sort of shortcut on my phone so you can press something and send out a message. Somehow. I’ll have to look up how to do that.” 

Dai tilted his face up and licked again at Suga’s chin, making him smile a little more.

“Thank you,” he whispered before pressing his own kiss to Dai’s forehead. “To take care of myself I need to take care of you, too. You must be starving.”

Dai pressed himself into Suga’s hand, but his tail didn't wag his tail like it normally did when Suga mentioned food. It was slightly worrisome, but the dog seemed sluggish, like he was still waking up. Suga blamed his lack of enthusiasm on that. 

He gave the beast another kiss to the forehead before sitting back up properly and looking towards the bedroom door, debating if he wanted to try to get up and get food first or if he wanted to take a shower. Both would probably make him feel a little better; food would give him energy and feeling clean always helped a bit.

The bed shifted as Dai moved forward, placing his head onto Suga’s lap and nosing at the phone there. The beast gave a soft whine, ears flicking towards Suga.

“I know. It must have been going off a lot, I'm sorry. I'll deal with all the messages…” Suga sighed, not actually wanting to deal with them. It was horrible, but he just wanted to delete them all. Pretend they weren't sitting there, waiting to be read with so many emotions behind them. “Later. I'll deal with them later. Or I'll teach you how to do it.” 

As much Suga wanted to push those sort of things into Dai, he knew he couldn't. He couldn't just ignore all the messages sent to him. He had to tell someone he wasn't still so sick he was blacking out.

Maybe he'd message Oikawa later. He was sure that was how He had found out Suga was sick in the first place. It was the only logical conclusion. Maybe he could pass on that message as well.

Suga dug his fingers into the meat of Dai’s ear a moment, then patted at the beast’s neck. “Let's go try to scrounge up some food. I'm not actually properly hungry but my stomach is angry it's empty. Yours probably is, too.” 

Dai blinked at him before pulling back so he could hop off the bed. The dog shook once he was standing, then looked back to Suga. The silver haired man unplugged his phone from the charger, then swung his legs over the side of the bed. 

The world spun again, but settled after a few moments. Dai was against him instantly, pressing into his legs, ready to steady him if need be. And Suga did, reaching out to place a hand on his back, fingers curling into the beast’s fur. 

Very slowly, Suga rocked himself up into his feet, clinging to Dai to keep himself up. His legs remained steady, though his head pounded just a bit. He turned just slightly, looking down at the still sleeping crows. They must have all been exhausted.

They shuffled more than walked to to kitchen, Suga hanging on tightly to Dai with one hand and holding his phone with the other. 

The room was clean, cleaner than Suga remembered leaving it. There were no dishes in the sink or on the drying rack, and the kettle was on the stove. Suga let go of Dai to move towards it, taking the kettle and moving it off to the side to sit on the counter. 

He hated having it on the stove. He wouldn't have left it there, unless he stopped making tea midway. 

But the kettle was empty.

Suga shook his head and sighed.

He had no memory of the past three days, so he could have done anything.

He reached up and rubbed at his face slowly, before turning towards the refrigerator. Now that he was in the kitchen, his stomach let out a loud rumbling growl, to remind him of the fact it was empty.

Dai trotted away to lay by the window as Suga pulled open the refrigerator.

He blinked at the large pot sitting on the second shelf and reached for it. 

He didn't remember making anything to eat before getting into the hot tub. He hadn't had enough ingredients to make the things he had wanted to before he had gone down to the town. 

Suga brought the pot from the refrigerator and set it in the counter, before carefully removing the lid, curious what was inside of it.

He dropped the lid to the floor with a loud clatter and stepped back once. Twice. Until his back was pressed the opposite counter.

The broth in the pot was clear, with wisps of eggs throughout it. The scent of it was muted, reduced from the lack of heat, but it made Suga want to throw up. 

He absolutely hated egg soup. It was tasteless and boring and reminded him of his childhood, spending hours upon hours in a hospital bed eating bland food. 

He never would have made it for himself. 

Which meant someone had left it in the refrigerator for him. 

Someone had been inside of the cabin, when he was too sick to leave his bed, and he couldn’t remember who it had been. 

There weren’t many people it could have even come. 

Kiyoko was the only one who knew the address to the cabin, and from her message, she had very clearly not given it out. The townspeople knew, in theory, where Suga had been staying, but he wasn’t friendly with them and he doubted even Abe or Yuuji would have come up to the cabin without his calling of them, and much less make him soup. It didn’t make any sense. 

Suga turned his gaze from the pot to the dog laying by the window. Dai was staring up at him, ears angled back in concern, but he hadn’t gotten up to comfort Suga. He looked like he was tired again, like the walk from the bedroom to the kitchen had exhausted him. 

Suga licked his lips, then slowly began to speak. “Dai, was someone else here?” The beast’s ears twitched forward, then he laid his head down on his paws. Like he was dismissing Suga’s question. It made Suga take a step forward, towards him, and point at the pot sitting on the counter. “I didn’t make that. Even if I was disgustingly sick and out of it, I wouldn’t have made that. Was someone else here? Did you let someone in?”

Dai huffed loudly through his nose and looked away from Suga, like he was offended of the accusation. The silver haired man bit his lip, then moved forward until he could kneel down beside the beast. He reached out and ran a hand over the beast’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” Dai angled an ear towards him. “I just know I didn’t make that. And you didn’t make it. So unless one of the birds made it, someone was here.” He paused, then lowered his voice. “And I don’t like the idea of someone else being here.” 

Dai watched him for a moment before leaning up and licking at Suga’s cheek. A comforting warmth tingled down Suga’s spine at the gesture, but he still frowned down at Dai. “What if they drugged you, and that is why you are so tired? I’ve never seen you like this, even when you were hurt.” Dai huffed at him again, sending hot air against his cheek, then laid his head back on his paws. He wagged his tail slowly and looked up at Suga with soulful eyes. 

“It doesn’t make sense, though. No one breaks in and leaves you soup. I want to check the locks. I mean….I guess the sliding doors aren’t always locked. You were able to open them to let the crows in. So maybe someone else got in.” Suga brought his hands up to hide his face in. “I don’t know. I don’t like it. I should call Abe to see if she came up. But why would she? Maybe I should call the cops? They’ll think I’m crazy.” He sighed, then parted his fingers to look at Dai through them. “Was it a ghost? Did a ghost leave me soup?” 

Dai snorted, then rolled onto his side to present his belly. Suga obediently reached out to scratch it. 

“I’m going to check the locks.” 

He patted Dai’s stomach once more before pushing himself up into standing. He moved too fast and dizziness took over him. He swayed, wanted to kneel back down and put his head between his legs, but he didn't move. Neither up or down, Suga stayed where he was until the dizziness subsided.

Dai was watching him carefully, and Suga gave him a small smile. “I'm okay, just, a little dizzy.” 

After another moment, when he had his bearings again, Suga started towards the front door. He had to brace his hand against the wall as he walked, fearful that he might lose his footing or his knees would give out on him. With how his stomach was protesting and growling at him, he was sure he hadn’t eaten in long enough that it was one of the reasons he felt so weak. 

But eating could come after making sure his cabin hadn’t been broken into. 

The front door was just how Suga had remembered leaving it; locked and secured. Nothing looked tampered with, and his keys were innocently sitting on the table where he usually kept them. 

No one had come through that way. 

With a soft groan, Suga shuffled back to the kitchen. Dai was still laying in front of the window, his eyes closed again and breathing evenly. The silver haired man paused and watched the beast. 

He was more than a little concerned about Dai’s behaviour. Had he somehow or another gotten Dai sick? He didn’t think those sort of illnesses travelled between animals and humans. Maybe Dai had eaten something that was bad for him while Suga had been too weak to get up and feed him? The dog had already proven he could get into the refrigerator on his own. 

If he didn’t get his energy back soon, Suga would have to take him down to visit the veterinarian. Suga wasn’t sure how well that would go over with Dai, but he’d rather have Dai a little upset with him than be sick as well. 

He just hoped it was that Dai hadn’t gotten much sleep while Suga was ill and that he was just tired. 

After watching Dai sleep for another minute, Suga moved around him to check the window to the balcony.

The sliding glass door was locked as well, the little notch angled down, indicating it had not been opened since Suga had locked it days ago. 

No one had come in through the either.

Suga ran a hand over his face.

The bedroom glass door was always unlocked, so Dai could come and go as he pleased. He knew it wasn't the most intelligent of decisions, but it had yet to backfire on him and the dog could open and close it on his own.

Suga glanced towards the sleeping beast.

Dai had protected him, he had proven it time and time again, with Yuuji and the man in the river. Dai wouldn't have let a stranger into the house. Dai would have kept him safe.

There was a sudden memory, a man standing over Suga, golden and regal, but it was gone before he could try to grab it and remember more.

He wasn't unsettled by the mental image, though. He didn't feel scared or think that maybe that had been the intruder. It felt like an image from a dream, and that man had been someone whom he could trust. 

Suga’s eyes slowly went from Dai to the pot on the counter.

The only logical explanation was that he had made the soup. Maybe he had started to prepare something else and had stopped halfway through and just put it away. As much as he hated egg soup, he could think of some things he could use it as a base for.

And who knows what his fever addled mind would have wanted.

Suga took a deep breath.

It was the only thing that made sense.

He walked slowly back into the main part of the kitchen, picked the lid for the pot of the ground, and placed it into the sink. The soup was probably still good but after the scare it had caused him, he really did not want any of it.

And he wasn't sure his stomach could even handle it.

He poured the soup down the drain, running water as he did so to hurry along the process.

He'd make some rice, with lots of pepper, after putting some chicken and vegetables on for Dai.

He refused to think about how clean the kitchen was and how uncomfortable it made him as he began to pull out what he would need to cook.

+++

Suga felt marginally better after eating something. His body still ached and he was groggy, but he no longer felt absolutely wretched. It was a vast improvement.

He took his time in the shower, moving sluggishly as he washed himself off, then just as slow as he dressed into clean clothes. He debated stripping the bed sheets and replacing them, but when he returned from the en suite, the crows were still asleep in their nest and Dai had climbed on top of the covers. Suga told himself he'd change them the next time he got up and crawled into the bed. Dai immediately snuggled into his side.

Suga took his phone from where he had left it on the bedside table before his shower and brought it into his lap. The notifications stared up at him and Suga frowned down at the device.

“I can hit clear all for the emails and phone calls,” he told Dai, “but...I have to manually do the voicemails. It looks like He filled my box.” Suga pressed the power button to put the screen into sleep mode. “Is it bad if I put this off?”

Dai blinked slowly up at Suga, then leaned forward to lick at Suga’s hand. 

“Fine. But, I don't want to listen to each one. We are just going to delete them and then you're going to sit there and let me hug you.” Dai didn't protest, so Suga activated his phone again and dialed the voicemail. He quickly put it on speaker.

“Please enter your password.” The robotic female voice demanded.

Suga typed it out and waited. 

“You have four saved voice messages and thirty new voice messages,” Suga made a face at the sheer amount. His inbox was completely full. “First new voice message from,” the voice listed off Bokuto’s number and Suga braced himself. He had to listen to the message because he couldn't remember which number to press to delete it. He hadn't listened to his voicemail in so long; hardly anyone actually left them.

“Suga,” Bokuto’s voice came from the phone, sounding panicked and scared and so full of emotion that it made his heart ache. Suga tightened his grip on his phone and forced himself to breath evenly. He hadn't heard that voice in so long. “Suga, Koushi. It's Koutarou. Please pick up. Oikawa messaged me, he said your were sick and he doesn't know where you are. Why doesn't he know where you are? Where did you go? If you aren't home, where are you? Please, please be somewhere safe. Last time you were sick….” He trailed off, not speaking for a few seconds before starting again, “Please call me back. I know I don't deserve it, but I need to know your are okay. Please, Koushi. Call or message me, please. Please, I know you hate me, but I'm worried.”

There was a loud beep.

“End of message,” the robotic female voice was back and Suga didn’t know if he was glad for it. “The replay the message, press 3. To save the message, press 4. To delete the message, press 7.” Suga tapped where the seven was on his phone, happy the cracked screen registered the pressure. “Message deleted. Next message from -” Suga hit seven, again and again and again, until the voice told him he had no more new messages. He ended the call and closed his eyes tightly.

They stung with tears that wanted to fall, but Suga refused to let them. He wouldn’t cry over hearing His voice, or the words he said. The hurt that he had buried instead of ever acknowledging flared in his chest and he had to take a steadying breath. No, he would not do this. This would not affect him. 

Bokuto was a good person, of course he would be worried. 

There was a brief mental debate over sending him a message, telling the other man he was okay, but Suga couldn’t do it. He knew he was being cruel and horrible and so selfish he was disgusted with himself, but he just couldn’t.

Instead he picked up his phone and opened up one of his social media pages. 

It was hard to type out the short sentence, with the broken screen and Dai practically crawling onto his lap so he could see what Suga was doing on his phone but he managed. 

‘Had a rough few days, but Dai and I are back on track. Check back soon for a hint of what is to come.’

He looked down to Dai and scratched at his neck. “How is that?” 

The beast twitched his ear, then leaned forward and nosed at the phone. The keyboard came up and random characters were hit and his autocorrect turned them into proper words. Suga bit back a smile at them, then raised his phone up slightly so he could add something before posting it to his account as well. 

‘ ‘Explicit, possess, cosmic’ - Dai decided to drop some hints of his own. He’s not wrong.’

Both posts got notifications almost instantly, from a username Suga did not recognize. But he did recognize the strange hair style with contrasting colors in the profile picture. His heart slammed in his chest and Suga turned the screen off on his phone and set the device onto the bedside table. 

“How about we try to get some more sleep?” He asked Dai in a slightly strained voice. The dog blinked up at him, ears angled forward curiously, before he thumped his tail a few times. Suga worried he would disturb the sleeping crows. For a moment, when he had come back to the room, he had been worried the birds had not actually been asleep at all, because he had never heard of birds sleeping so deeply, but then he had noticed the smaller one, who had been stretched out earlier, had somehow rolled onto its back and was sleeping like that. It occasionally kicked out a foot, and the larger one ruffled its feathers every so often as it snoozed, so his fears they were dead were gradually soothed. 

Dai pulled back just enough that Suga could slide down into laying, then promptly thunked his large head back onto the man’s chest. It made Suga grunt, but he chuckled all the same at how affectionate the beast truly was. 

“You’ll keep any bad dreams away, right?” He asked the dog, reaching up to bury his fingers into Dai’s neck scruff. His response was a delicate lick to the nose. “Of course you will, why do I even have to ask?”

It was still light outside, nowhere near sunset or an acceptable time to nap, but Suga felt exhausted. He felt better than he did when he had first woken up, but his body was still, hopefully, recovering and he needed rest. Getting up, making food, showering, and wandering around the house had been more tiring than he thought it would have been. Dai seemed to agree, closing his bright eyes and settling against Suga. 

It was a comforting weight, and it didn’t take long for Suga’s eyes to shut. The noises that had once woken him, the chittering of birds and rustling of the wind, combined with the gentle rise and fall of Dai’s chest against his, acted as a sweet lullaby. He was asleep before his thoughts had time to twist and sour in his mind.

+++

He was standing in the living room of the cabin, he knew that, he recognized the structure of it, but it was void of any furniture or the fancy decorations Suga had slowly grown to like. The only thing that gave the space any sort of life was small fire cackling away under the mantle. Suga moved towards it, his hands going out in front of him to absorb its warmth.

He wasn’t cold, but a good fire always made him feel better, and there was something in the pit of his stomach, a dread or a weighted sadness. It made him ache and he just wanted to sit in front of the fire until he felt lighter. 

“You are beautiful.” 

Suga’s stiffened at the words, shocked by their suddenness, then whirled around. A man was standing in the middle of the room, a stranger who seemed vaguely familiar. He was as tall as Suga was, maybe a little taller, and made of tanned skin and hard lines. He was completely nude, save a strange crown of twigs and leaves on his head and a smattering of dark chest hair that got thicker and unrulier the lower it went. The man didn’t seem ashamed of his nakedness at all, and in fact, looked rather amused that Suga was gaping at him. 

The man took a step forward and Suga felt no need to cringe away. The man wouldn’t hurt him, he knew it. He was completely safe with the strange naked man in front of him. 

The man stopped only a step away from Suga, and he felt himself inhale sharply as more details of the stranger were shown in firelight. The man’s eyes were beautiful, almost a swirling dark amber and so full of warmth, but also hard in a way that Suga knew he was not to be messed with. Up close, Suga could see his skin with littered with pale scars, small nicks along his shoulders and arms, making him seem battle worn, like some sort of warrior from another time period, and perhaps it was the fire behind Suga that made his skin seem to be glowing and flickering, as if he was emitting his own light. 

The man reached up with his right hand and Suga was pretty sure he stopped breathing until the man cupped his cheek. His palm was calloused and rough against Suga’s skin, but it was so very warm and comforting and he couldn’t help but lean into it. 

“You are beautiful,” the man repeated, his voice rich and low and as soothing as his touch. “But you have such a sadness in you. I do not like it. It dims you.” His thumb began to slowly move over Suga’s cheek and the sheer gentleness of it had Suga closing his eyes. “And there is a fear, one of many that I cannot stand to see inside of you.” Suga felt the man step closer to him, then their foreheads were touching. 

“No one will ever harm you,” the man whispered, though his voice had taken a hard edge to it. “Not here, or anywhere else, if I have a say in it. You are mine and I will always protect you.” Suga’s eyes opened and he frowned up at the man staring down at him. It was a bold proclamation but for some reason, Suga wasn’t bothered by it. He had no idea who this man was or how he had gotten into the cabin, or why he was naked, but his words held truth in them. The man in front of him would not let any harm come to him. 

The man let out a soft sigh and his breath was warm against Suga’s lips. He almost wanted to push forward, to connect them in another way, but he stayed still. His own boldness was overshadowed by his want to hear more of the man’s confusing words. 

The man’s eyes flickered down to Suga’s lips, like he had his own desires, but he simply smiled. “We are bonded now, my Human,” the man breathed out the words and Suga shivered at how husky they sounded. “It has caused a mild upset of things, but they will readjust.” The man tipped his head up slightly so their noses brushed together. A low whine escaped Suga’s throat because his want to kiss the stranger in front of him had increased at least tenfold by the simple action. He felt completely entranced by the man.

“I am interrupting your rest and we both very much need it. I wish I had known sooner about your predicament, but that is my own fault. You need not worry of falling like that again. You are safe with me, in every sense.” 

“What?” Suga asked in a whisper, words finally coming to him for the first time since the man had appeared. All of his words had been confusing, but those had made absolutely no sense. When had he fallen? 

“Your body is still weak, but you will not relapse into a fever again.”

“How can you know that?” There was no malice in his words, only curiosity. No one could predict what his body would do, but the man just gave a low chuckle and pulled away from Suga. 

“You need to rest now, my Human. I swear it will all be okay.” The man caressed his cheek again, then stepped away. Behind Suga, the fire roared, and he turned to see it stretch out from under the mantle. It burned brightly and Suga found himself slowly kneeling in front of it, enjoying the warmth that it brought him.

+++

Suga stared at his laptop, a familiar sense of panic creeping up his spine.

He had wasted at least four days being sick; four days he could have spent editing his novel. There was so much work to be done and he hadn’t even started yet. His cushion days were gone and now he was behind by six chapters. He couldn’t put it off any longer if he wanted to be done by the end of his month long stay. 

He needed to start editing.

Suga closed his laptop and got off of the couch to walk across the main room to stand in front of the window. He crossed his arms over his stomach and stared out at the lawn. 

He had been awake for hours but the sun was only just starting to rise. The forest was starting to wake as well, like the light was breathing life into it. He could hear the birds starting to stir, chittering away as they began their day. Movement on the lawn caught his attention and leaned towards the glass, cupping his hands around his eyes to shield them from the gathering light. 

It appeared to be one of the crows, hopping about on the lawn, Dai’s rope toy clutched in its beak. Suga had to stifle a laugh.

He quickly walked to the bedroom and out the open sliding glass door. The balcony was covered in morning dew and Suga told himself, once again, that he really needed to put a pair of shoes on the balcony so he would stop going out barefoot. But his feet were already wet and he didn't care much, so he hurried down the ramp and onto the grass. The crow stopped bouncing about and watched as Suga drew nearer to him, until the man stopped and crouched a meter or so away. 

“Did they leave you to go into the woods?” Suga asked the black bird, which was the smaller of the two, he realized. He had opened the sliding glass door for Dai and the crows when he had woken up and they had been gone since. Suga wasn't worried, as it was not uncommon, he had found. 

Dai needed his exercise and his own space, after all.

The crow eyed Suga a moment before taking a tentative hop towards him. 

“I'll play with you,” the silver haired man clarified, holding out his hand for the rope. He still felt exhausted, and he probably shouldn't be out on wet grass with no shoes on and clad only in his sleep pants, but something firm in the back of his mind told him he would be okay. He could throw a toy around.

The crow flapped its wings with what Suga assumed was excitement before it moved close enough to drop the rope right in front of Suga. 

“Alright,” he said, picking up the toy as he stood. He rolled his shoulder, then threw the toy as high and far as he could. The bird took off after it, wings flapping hard as he took to the air. Suga laughed as the crow spun in the air and dove down after arcing high in the air to catch the rope with its beak. 

The bird flew back to him and dropped the rope midair. Suga managed to catch it and flung it in the opposite direction. The crow soared after it.

He didn’t know how they stood out of the grass, tossing the rope around. Suga changed things up occasionally, throwing the toy straight up in the air or only pretending to throw it. The crow dive bombed him when he did that and Suga ran shrieking with laughter as the crow chased him until he finally threw it off to the side. They only stopped playing when the sun had risen above the trees and Dai emerged from the forest. 

The big dog looked between the two of them, Suga hiding the rope behind the back while the crow stood on the grass, wings spread out and mid-caw. Dai’s ear twitched then he trotted forward until he could nose at the toy Suga was holding. The man released it to its rightful owner and then with a quick flick of his tail and a playful grin, Dai was bounding away. The crow cried out in shock and took off after the beast and Suga quickly followed suit, joining in the fray and chasing Dai around the lawn until his lungs burned. 

He collapsed down onto the still wet grass, panting heavily around a large smile. All the worry about his deadlines and cushion days had completely evaporated. He hadn’t thought of it once since he had come onto the lawn. 

Dai laid beside him, leaning against Suga, his toy hanging loosely in his mouth. He dropped it onto the grass in favor of snuffling and licking Suga’s hands. 

The crow took its chance and stole the toy, flying off onto a branch once it was secured. Dai hardly seemed to notice or care, too interested in trying to force Suga into petting him. It was not a very hard task.

Once it did not hurt to breathe, which took quite a while due to the way his throat ached and burned, Suga pushed himself up into standing. Dai supported him, leaning against his legs as they both walked towards up the ramp and across the balcony. Suga wiped his feet on the towel he had placed on the floor in the bedroom for that exactly purpose, then slid the door closed when they were both inside.

Suga scratched at Dai’s flank as they stood at the end of the bed. “I have to get to work now,” he all but moaned. As much as he wanted to goof around and play with Dai and the crows and watch bad movies, and mostly focus on getting better, he really needed to work on his novel. 

Suga stopped petting at Dai to scrub at his own face. He could do this, as much as he didn't want to. He just had to sit in front of his laptop and open up the appropriate word documents and work on them.

Maybe he needed to make some tea first. That would help him concentrate and it would soothe his aching throat.

Dai was looking up at him with one ear flat against his head when Suga moved his hands away, like he knew what was going through the man’s mind.

“It's just tea!” Suga whined as Dai made his way out of the room and very pointedly towards the couch. “It will take like, ten minutes to make, tops!”

He refused to look at his laptop as he crossed the main room into the kitchen. He busied himself by putting on the kettle, then washing the dishes from his half eaten breakfast as the water boiled. He wiped the counters as the tea steeped, and took out the trash as he waited for it to cool slightly. 

By the time he got back to the couch, Dai had stretched out to take up most of the cushions, leaving Suga but a single space he could squeeze into. As soon as he sat, Dai plopped his large head onto Suga’s lap. The man scratched at his ear. 

“How do you expect me to work if I can’t get to my laptop?” A huff was his response. Suga sighed, then leaned forward to grab the laptop off of the coffee table and carefully balance it on the arm of the chair. He had to turn at a slight angle to comfortably look at the device and after a bit of squirming and rearranging of his legs, he found the position acceptable for the moment. 

He opened up the word document that contained the first chapter of his barely finished novel, then reached for his phone, which was on the small end table beside the couch, flashing at him from beside his tea.

He had a new message waiting for him, from Oikawa. He hesitated to open it. He hadn’t replied to any message he had gotten while ill and had essentially only let his friends know he wasn’t dead from a status update. He felt a little horrible and more than a little guilty. He did not want to deal with Oikawa being angry at him. 

But he could at least see what the man wanted. There was a chance it could be important.

He opened up the message and cringed. It was a request for a video chat; with no emojis anywhere in the text. 

It seemed like a mimic of the text he had sent Oikawa what felt like weeks ago.

Suga looked down to Dai, who was watching him with mild interest. 

“I at least...owe him this. He was clearly worried.” Dai angled his ears back and Suga shrugged. “I know. After? Okay. And you can hold me to it, no letting me get up until I at least finished the first two chapters. Unless I need to pee. But other than that, no getting up. Okay?” 

The dog huffed and closed his eyes. Suga took it as a sign of agreement and pulled up the messenger program on his laptop, signing into his account. ‘UFho’ was online and Suga clicked the call button. 

The little phone emoji shook in the middle of his screen for a moment before Oikawa answered. His best friend looked perfect and ready for the day in a crisp suit while Suga hadn’t even bothered to change out of his pajamas after his shower. 

“You look like shit.” Oikawa stated as a greeting. He didn’t look pleased that Suga had answered his request and it made the silver haired man want to shrink back into the couch.

“I’m not dead.” He offered.

“I didn’t know that,” Oikawa huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at the camera. “You are lucky your manager messaged me when you replied to her and that I didn’t have to find out through a Twitter post. I have half a mind to track you down myself and drag you off to the hospital. What the fuck were you thinking?” 

“I’m sorry,” Suga whispered, hating that he upset his friend so much. 

“If you ever ignore me like that again when you are sick, Sugawara, I swear to…” Oikawa trailed off and ducked his head. “I was terrified,” he said after a heavy moment, his voice breaking just slightly. 

“I’m sorry,” Suga repeated, truly meaning it. “I don’t know why I didn’t message you back. I don’t remember anything. Like at all.”

“You told Shimizu-san you were okay.” There was an accusation in the tone and Suga had to look away from the camera, guilt pooling in his stomach.

“I don’t know, Tooru. I really don’t. The last thing I remember is sitting in the hot spring outside, then I woke up feeling like shit and it was three days later. Everything between that is a blank.”

“You don’t remember me calling?” Suga looked up at his friend’s words, frowning at the pout he saw. He shook his head. “What about….” He trailed off again, but Suga knew what he meant. Did he remember Bokuto messaging and calling him obsessively. 

“You told him.” 

“I thought he could talk some sense into you.” 

Suga didn’t reply. They lapsed into a silence, and he had a feeling neither of them were looking at the screen. After what felt like an hour, Oikawa finally sighed.

“I’m sorry, Koushi.” 

“I’m sorry, too, Tooru.” Suga glanced back to the screen and offered a tentative smile. Oikawa returned it and a moment later they were fully facing each other, the air already feeling lighter. Oikawa scrunched up his nose and squinted his eyes.

“Kou-chan,” the nickname made Suga want to sigh with relief. It was a true sign Oikawa was no longer absolutely furious with him, “can you either move or turn off the lights behind you? I can barely see you.”

Suga’s eyes darted to the corner of the screen where his own video feed was. Oikawa was correct; his outline was visible but his features were blurred by light. He frowned. 

The only light in the room was natural and the window was off the side of him; not in front or behind him. He shouldn’t have been looking like he could pass for a lighthouse beacon.

“I’m sorry,” he grunted, reaching out to smack at the side of his screen. “I think my camera is being weird. Maybe my thing updated and it changed the luminosity or something?”

“I don’t know, but it is hurting my eyes,” Oikawa complained. “Fix it.” 

“I don’t know how,” Suga whined back, opening up his settings. After a few tabs, he found a brightness scale and brought it all the way down. It helped, somewhat, but there was still a halo of light around Suga on the screen. “Better?” 

“Much.” Oikawa opened his mouth to start to say something else, but off screen, there was a loud bang that distinctly sounded like a door slamming, then an angry shout of ‘Shittykawa!’ Oikawa’s eyes widened in what Suga knew was fear of having been caught doing something his husband disapproved of. Oikawa brought his hand up to cover his mouth, like he could hide his breathing so he wouldn’t be found, and Suga narrowed his eyes at his best friend.

“What did you do this time?” Suga hissed. Oikawa shrugged, turning to look off screen with a face that suggested he was about to bolt.

“I don’t remember-”

He was cut off by the sound of another door slamming, and Iwaizumi yelling, “What the hell did I tell you about -” 

The call ended suddenly and Suga assumed Oikawa had closed his laptop while trying to somehow convince his husband to spare his soul. 

The silver haired man looked down to Dai, who was still resting his head on Suga’s lap, and he dropped a hand to rub at the fur along the dog’s neck. “Nothing bad happened while I was sick, did it?” He asked after a few moments of petting, his voice soft and low. “I hate that I can’t remember anything. I usually have at least flashes but, there is nothing.”

Dai flicked his ear and closed his eyes. Suga took it as a sign that nothing had happened. 

He turned back to his laptop and signed out of his messenger program. He didn’t have many contacts, but he did not want to risk anyone trying to lure him into a conversation. 

“Okay,” Suga said to himself, cracking his knuckles as he did. “Editing the first two chapters, starting….Now.”

+++

He was running along crowded streets, elbowing his way past men and women in elaborate costumes and fantastical porcelain masks. There were high, ancient European buildings surrounding him, sporting large colorful banners littered with words he couldn’t read. The air was festive, filled with laughter and upbeat chatter, but he didn’t care for any of that. He was chasing something, someone. They had what he needed to complete his mission and he needed to capture them.

There was muffled explosion not far in front of him, followed by a flash of white and black, and he realized with a start that they were feathers floating up into the air, mingling with smoke and soot. He surged forward, trying to reach them before they disappeared into the crowd, who didn’t seem concerned with what was happening around them. He stretched his arm out as he ran and a feather barely brushed the tip of his fingers before it swirled up and to his left, carried away by the wind. He turned and shoved a man wearing a stylized fawn mask out of his way so he could chase after it. 

The feather floated above the crowd before dropping suddenly out of sight in front of a large gothic looking building he knew inherently to be a church. The large wooden doors were thrown open and people in expensive looking masks were filling in, while a haunting song that reminded him of a lullaby wafted out into the streets. The tune was strangely beautiful, one that fit the atmosphere of a grand masquerade ball being held, but there was something, maybe an accordion or a violin, that reminded him of a wooden puppet on a string, dancing around on a little stage. 

Suga pushed his way into the church. 

The pews had all been cast aside to make room for a dance floor. Couples were twirling around, all in a matching dance, while candelabras floated high in the air, giving the only source of ghostly light. There was no band playing, but the music echoed throughout the chamber without a clear source. 

He watched in wonder as two male figures danced past him, both wearing sleek black suits and shockingly white full face masks, that had no markings beyond large eye holes and a small v to indicate a beak. The owls stared at him, gold and green eyes boring into him as the spun away, and Suga took a step back. 

Right into someone. 

He turned to apologize to the person, but his words caught in his throat. 

It was the stranger from the cabin, but he was no longer nude. It was a slight shame, but the disappoint was not great because the outfit he was in did him great justice; a form fitting grey military style jacket, with buttons that went at a swooping angle across his chest, emphasizing how broad it was. The high collar of the jacket was leather, as well as the shoulders. His pants matched his jacket, and were tucked into dark boots. The man still had his crown, but now there were purple and black flowers woven into it that Suga vaguely recognized as nightshade. He was the only other person in the room not hidden behind a mask.

The man tilted his head at Suga, looking him up and down, and Suga very much felt like he was a prey animal that had just been caught by the big bad wolf. 

In one quick motion, the man grabbed Suga, one hand tangled with his own, and one at Suga’s waist, and swung them onto the dance floor. The steps to the dance came naturally to him, like he had always known them, and they were quickly twirling around the dance floor with the rest of the costumed figures. Suga stared up into the man’s ambers eyes as he was lead through the steps with confidence, unable to look away from him.

As the song came to a close, the instruments began to fade one by one until it was just a crying string singing by its lonesome. The man let go of Suga’s waist then and brought their joined hands above his head, sending Suga into a spin as he did. 

As he turned, the scene around him began to change. The other dancers faded into the shadows and the interior of the church blurred and settled into that of the main room of the cabin. 

The music ended without a quiver and Suga was pulled out of his spin and right against the stranger’s chest, his breath being knocked out of him. The man’s other hand returned to his waist and he held Suga close as they started to sway again, this time without music playing around them. 

“You dreamt of me,” the man whispered, a small smile on his lips. His eyes were full of amusement and fondness.

“This isn’t a dream?” Suga questioned back, tilting his head to look around the barren room. The fire was once again roaring under the mantle, but beyond that, they were the only things in the space. The man chuckled.

“You are a clever one when you want to be,” the man said, giving Suga’s hip a squeeze. “Technically this a dream, as you are asleep, but it also is not.”

The answer was cryptic and caused Suga to frown as he was rocked back and forth. “Then what is this?” 

The man hummed, and titled his head back to look up at the ceiling as he thought of his answer. “A place for us to meet.” He settled on and looked back down at Suga, a hint of sadness in his smile. “And I have wanted to meet you for so long.” 

Suga blinked at the response, not sure how to process it. He didn’t know who the man was, beyond his claim of being Suga’s protector. But, as strange as it felt, he was okay with not knowing just yet. He decided to not question how the man knew who he was.

They continued to sway in the middle of the room, their feet not moving as they danced with each other to a silent song. It took only a minute for Suga’s eyes to flutter shut so he could enjoy the sensation fully. The man squeezed his hand, then there was a gentle pressure against his forehead, and Suga realized the other man had pressed his own there, so they were even closer together. 

The man began to sing, barely above a whisper, but in the quiet of the cabin, Suga could hear it perfectly, could feel the puffs of breath against his lips. The words weren’t in Japanese, nor were they in any language Suga recognized, but they were in the melody of the song they had been dancing to inside of the church. The lyrics seemed heartfelt and mournful and he quickly found himself lost in the song he didn’t understand; pressing himself flush against the stranger and gripping tightly to his jacket as they danced.

They rocked slowly as the man repeated his haunting song over and over again, all but clinging to each other, until the fire slowly died out behind them and left them in darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *finger guns* 
> 
> The masquerade song is based on The Vampire Masquerade by Peter Gundry.


	7. Lime  Juice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miscommunications & Explanations.

Suga leaned back against the shower wall, pressing his shoulders back into it as he arched his hips out. He had one hand wrapped around his cock, pumping it a little too tight and fast, but just perfect for the scenario he was playing out in his mind. At some point, his other hand had snaked up from where he had been tweaking one of his nipples to shove two fingers into his mouth. The sensation of something heavy and warm on his tongue made him give a choked off whine. 

He was close, he knew it, he had been achingly hard when he had woken up and at the point he was at it was more imagination holding him back than his body not being ready. He wanted to finish out his mental scene.

He could almost feel hands on his skin, fingers digging into his hips as he imagined his invisible lover biting into his neck while they rutted into him. They were faceless, Suga’s mind unable to conjure up anything beyond a broad chest and tanned skin, but he wanted so badly to be marked by them, to be theirs and show it to the world. It was primal and in a more lucid state he'd find it a little wrong, but for the moment all he could focus on was a deep, almost wrecked as he was voice, growling “You are mine,” into his ear. 

He could hear the words in his mind, picture them perfectly like they were from a memory instead of a fantasy. 

Suga’s hand began to pump faster. He thought of how his lover would slam up into him, relentless in his efforts to get them both off. Suga imagined someone who could easily lift him, hold him against the wall as he claimed him with his body and his words. He pictured hips starting to stutter as they both drew close, maybe in the shower or up against the kitchen wall, breathing heavily until there was sharp bite to his neck or shoulder, and hot seed was spilled inside of him. 

Suga cried out around his fingers as he came, something strangled that wasn’t really a word or a name. His knees and thighs quaked with the force of the orgasm and he had to ease himself down the wall into sitting. He was grateful for the water spraying on his skin; it quickly washed away his own mess and cleaned his spit covered fingers when he held his hand up into the spray. 

He closed his eyes and rolled his head back to rest against the tile as he came down from his orgasm. He was glad he had washed his hair the day prior, because he was pretty sure he did not have the energy to even attempt to properly wash himself. He felt completely boneless in the best of ways. 

Suga could not remember the last time he had come so hard and so satisfyingly. 

He was brought out of his content afterglow by the door to the bedroom rattling. He lazily rolled his head to the side and watched as the door shook in its frame. It stopped after a moment, then a distinct scratching sound came from the other side, followed by a high pitched whine. 

The door rattled again as Dai tried to stuff his nose under it. 

Suga couldn’t help but smile, ducking his head as he did. 

The dog had tried so hard to follow him into the en suite, and Suga had all but slammed the door in his face. He would have felt so guilty getting off in front of the beast. He knew Dai always liked to be with him, but for some things, Suga did want to be alone. 

Dai clearly did not like that idea, signalling so with another scratch at the door. 

Suga took pity on him and forced himself into standing. He turned off the water, then with shaky legs, crossed the bathroom to open the door. 

Dai knocked him over, sending Suga to the ground with a crash and a yelp. The beast wasted no time covering his face with slobber and licks. 

It reminded Suga of their first night together, when Dai had bowled him over and covered him in kisses before laying on top of him to keep him warm. It did not feel like it had been nearly two weeks prior; it felt like a lifetime ago. Dai was no longer bandaged up and Suga could not even tell where he had been injured. It was like he had never been hurt at all. 

All of it made him smile. 

Dai’s licks moved from his face down to his neck and chest, and Suga huffed a laugh. As Suga reached up to scratch at Dai’s shoulders, the beast paused his kisses to snuffle at the man’s neck. Suga closed his eyes, trying to not laugh again at how much it tickled. He tangled his fingers in Dai’s fur, hoping the beast took pity and him and stopped.

Dai stopped, but there was no pity. 

Teeth grazed his neck, a slight sharp pressure that was nowhere close to a bite or even a nip. Suga’s still sensitive body responded instantly; he gasped and arched his back as the sensation shot down his spine and went straight to his loins.

Dai pulled back to look down at Suga, giving the man a doggy grin, with his eyes bright with amusement and his wagging behind him so hard it was slamming into the counters.

Suga lowered himself back to the floor and clutched at where the beast had teased him. It had been exactly where he had imagined someone biting him when he had his orgasm. 

It was a coincidence, but Suga’s body was starting to respond to it and he felt dirty for it. Dai was his dog, who had no idea what he was doing and just wanted to play or show affection.

Though he had never used his teeth with Suga before.

“No biting,” the man chided. Dai beamed down at him before leaning down to start licking at his chest again. He almost instantly ran his tongue over one of Suga’s nipples and the man moaned without meaning or wanting to.

His cock was twitching back to life and that was something he definitely did not want at all. He would not become aroused because his dog was teasing him. It was just his stupid, oversensitive nipples. 

Suga put his hands on Dai’s chest and pushed. The beast obediently moved back, his tail thumping into the counters as he did. His ears were perked forward and he looked so excited that Suga felt like a horrible monster as he reached forward and gently bopped Dai on the nose. The dog gave him a shocked expression. 

“No,” Suga said firmly, as he pushed himself up into sitting. “No licking there. You can kiss my hands and my face all you want, I don’t mind that, but not there.” 

Dai lowered himself to the ground, resting his head on Suga’s thigh, and whined. Guilt coursed through Suga’s stomach; of course Dai didn’t know what he had done wrong, he was just trying to be loving. Suga instantly dug his fingers into the meat of Dai’s ear and pulled his up slightly to kiss at the dog’s forehead. 

“No, no, boy. It’s not bad, you’re a good boy, my body just likes it a little too much and that’s makes me feel uncomfortable, okay? I love your kisses.” 

Dai responded by eagerly licking at his cheeks and chin and Suga allowed it, not pushing him away again until Dai was almost knocking him back down. 

“Okay, out, out, I need to wash my face again and get dressed.”

Dai obeyed, pulling back and turning towards the door, but then he paused and looked back to the man. He gave Suga a hard stare, ears twitching slightly, before tilting his head to the side and closing one eye briefly. Then he turned and trotted out, tail wagging lazily. 

Suga frowned at the strange look, then turned to grab the washcloth from the counter. He pointedly ignored his arousal, waiting for it to go away on its own. Guilt pooled in his belly at the mere sight of it and more with every twitch it gave, demanding his attention. 

Suga wet the cloth, then began to rub it over his face, washing away the sweat that had built up at his temples. He closed his eyes as he did and forced himself to focus on things that would not tempt his arousal. 

He felt better, which was amazing. His nose was no longer clogged up and it no longer hurt to breathe. The only lingering after effects were a heaviness in his limbs. He was sure if he allowed himself, he could sleep for another twenty hours, but he didn’t want to. He had things he needed to do, as tempting as sleeping was. 

He was still behind on editing, but he was catching up. The next chapter was going to be a tolling one; it was the longest and had a gratuitous amount of foreshadowing and red herrings. He drastically needed to cut back on them because he was sure he had come off more pretentious than clever. He did not need Kiyoko writing him an essay about such things. 

Because she would and it would hurt his fragile writer ego. 

To get through the editing of that part of his manuscript, he would need to make sure that there was nothing he could distract himself with, so he would need to make sure everything he could possibly weasel his way out of writing for was already done. He needed to start the laundry, get the dishes done, and do some sort of run down to town make sure he wouldn’t want for anything. He was running low on coffee creamer, and with the amount of coffee he drank when in front of his laptop, he knew that could become an excuse. 

Suga dropped the washcloth into the sink and reached for his toothbrush instead. As he squeezed some paste onto it, then stuck it into his mouth, he wondered if he was well enough to go up and down the mountain. He was tired, yes, but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t collapse if he tried. He’d just have to take his time. He could bring the bike and cheat his way out of walking down the path; save his energy for the journey up. Or he could walk down, and take a cab back up. 

Or he could be extremely lazy and bike down, then take a cab up and pay the extra fare to bring the bike along. 

That seemed like the most appealing option, especially given he still wanted to crawl back into bed. 

That would cut down the time he was away from his laptop as well, so really, it was a win-win situation. 

Happy with his decision, Suga rinsed out his mouth. He glanced at his stomach as he bent over to spit out the mixture of water and spuds into the sink and was pleased to see his erection had faded. Not thinking about it had worked. 

He really needed to work on not having such sensitive nipples. 

He didn’t need to dry off; he had barely gotten wet, so he didn’t bother with a towel at all and went back into the bedroom nude. 

Dai was waiting for him, in a sense. 

The beast was standing in front of the sliding glass window, his head lowered and his ears back. He wasn’t growling, but even Suga could tell that something was not right. His body language screamed anger. 

Suga pulled on a pair of jeans, not even bothering to button or zip them up, then walked to where Dai was standing. He pulled back the curtain, trying to see what had upset Dai so much. 

His breath caught in his throat. 

The first thing his eyes were drawn to were the two deer in the middle of the lawn. The first was a slim looking one that whose face and neck was in shades of cream and light brown, while the rest of it was almost black. It had a decent pair of antlers on its head, long and sharp enough that they could easily run Suga through, but they looked like they still had growing to do. It had its nose to the ground, and it seemed to be snuffling along the grass around the hot spring.

The second deer was the creature he had met in the forest days before. Suga was sure of it. It had the same little antlers and the strange diagonal dot pattern across its head. It was trailing after the other deer, flicking its ears whenever bigger deer paused. 

Past the deer, and even more shocking than seeing the creatures out in the morning sun, there were the bursts of wildflowers along the tree line. Bright patches of white little flowers, grouped up in tight clusters, with large pink and purple blossoms claiming any empty spaces. Both types seemed to be climbing up the trees and Suga wondered how long they had been waiting to be bloom to grow that large. 

He wished his phone was easily accessible; he very much wanted a picture of the deer with all the splashes of color behind them. It would have been lovely. 

But his phone was on the other side of the room, charging. He feared if he went to go get it, the deer would move on. 

He wasn’t even sure why they were out on the lawn. The only food scraps he had left had been in a bowl on the balcony, for Dai’s crow friends, and they had very eagerly gobbled them up. 

Suga moved his hand slowly to reach for the handle of the sliding glass door. He wanted to get a better look at the deer; they were so beautiful and maybe, if the little one recognized him, he could get close enough to touch one. He did, also, want to make sure the wound on the creature’s leg was healing and hadn’t become infected. 

A low growl made him freeze.

He had almost forgotten Dai had been beside him. 

Suga looked down at the beast and was surprised to see his hackles were pulled back and his longer-than-Suga’s-fingers fangs were being bared. His fur was bristled up, making him look so much larger than he already was. 

Suga almost wanted to take a step back, but the aggression was not directed towards him and he knew, even if it was, Dai would not hurt him. He had a feeling in his gut that Dai would never hurt him. 

The beast’s gaze was intensely locked onto something across the lawn and Suga tried to follow it. He had to lean against the glass, cupping his hands around his eyes to fight the glare, but he saw what was causing Dai’s agitation. If he was following the dog’s eye line correctly.

The trees, past the flowers, seemed to be covered in lumps; lumps that were moving. Suga couldn't tell what they were, only that they were living. He knew that cicadas were a thing that lived in the mountains and perched on trees, but he had never actually seen one, only heard them in the early mornings with the birds. He wasn't aware when their breeding season was, but when there was still frost in the air didn't seem like the right time. 

But he didn't know much about bugs, so he could have very well been wrong. 

He looked down to Dai, wondering why the beast was so upset over the bugs. Maybe he could hear them chirping through the glass and it was hurting his ears? Though, Suga didn’t hear anything, but that didn’t mean much. 

He glanced at the deer again, a little smile coming to his lips as they seemed to be heading back to the forest. The large one was still snuffling along the ground, but with not as much interest, and the smaller seemed to be done with its antics. It had walked passed him and already near the edge of the flowers. 

Suga was glad he had forgone going to get his phone; he would have probably not come back in time and would have missed enjoying their presence, however brief it had been. 

He dropped his hand down to Dai’s head and scratched the agitated beast’s ear. “Come on, boy, we’ve got cleaning to do.” 

Dai ignored him, keeping his attention out the window, but Suga didn’t push it. He figured if Dai got annoyed enough with the bugs or whatever was on the trees, he’s force open the window and bark until he scared them away. 

Gathering laundry was his first task. He was down to a few clean pairs of clothes; not that he had packed very much in the first place, so that didn’t say much. He pulled on what he would wear for the day; a thin white shirt and red flannel button up to go over it, then stuffed everything else into the laundry basket and hauled it off to the proper room. Stuffing it all into the machine was easier than he thought; he actually had a little bit of room to spare. He got the machine going, then went to the kitchen.

Suga was rather good about making sure he didn’t leave himself a mess, but there were a few things lingering on the counter. He made quick work of it all and ever went as far as to throw out some fruit he had that was starting to go bad. Another potential excuse averted, and he added it to his list of things to pick up from the store.

He did a quick check of the refrigerator to make sure he wasn’t going to run out of things unexpectedly, then grabbed for his tote bags and headed back to the bedroom to grab his phone and wallet. 

Dai was still glaring out the window, ears angled back and hackles raised. 

Suga sighed, then ran his hand through his hair. 

“Dai, I’m going now. I’ll be back in a bit.” 

That got the dog’s attention. Dai whirled around, tail loudly smacking into the glass, and he stared up at Suga what could only be in shock. His ears swirled forward and the beast cocked his head to the side and let out a low questioning ‘boof’. 

“Down to the store to pick up some things. I need to make sure I can hermit up properly so I can tackle the next chapter,” Suga explained. Dai blinked at him, then slowly lowered himself to the ground. The beast rolled onto his side, exposing his belly, then broke Suga’s heart.

Dai began to whine, low in his throat. It was heart wrenching and pained and Suga dropped to his knees to run his hands over Dai’s side. Dai whined again, then turned so he could crawl, actually crawl, into Suga’s lap and he pressed his forehead into the man’s chest. Suga wrapped his arms around the beast, hugging him close. 

“Dai, what’s wrong, boy?” 

Dai had never acted so put out when Suga had left before. Perhaps it had to do with his upset over the trees, or the fact Suga had not given him enough affection that morning. 

He promptly leaned down and began peppering the dog’s head with kisses. “I won’t be long,” he promised. Dai whimpered and pressed harder against Suga’s chest, forcing him back slightly. He had to throw a hand out behind him so he wouldn’t fall backwards, as Dai tried to fit himself into Suga’s lap. 

Suga bit back a smile and scratched at Dai’s ear with his free hand. “I’m taking a cab back, I promise I won’t be long. An hour, at the most.” The whining continued, getting louder with each moment. “I’ll bring you back some treats, too, and when I get back we can cudd- oof!” 

Dai surged forward, forcing Suga onto his back. The angle was awkward, almost painful. His knees were bent so his legs were tucked under him and his arm was under him. Dai pushed forward so he was actually laying on Suga’s chest, forcing all the air from Suga’s lungs. 

Dai licked at his cheek and thumped his tail against the ground, seemingly pleased he had trapped Suga underneath him. 

“Dai, no,” he said, after he could breathe. Aches were quickly building up in his joints, from the way he was bending and the new added weight put on them. It had only been a second or so, but his hips and shoulder were starting to scream at him in pain. “Off.” 

Dai didn’t listen, instead nuzzling at Suga’s temple and slathering him with lazy kisses. 

His thighs were beginning to shake. “Dai, off!” He ordered, taking up a harsh tone. The beast sat up and scrambled back instantly, amber eyes full of concern. Slowly, Suga pulled his arm out from under him and stretched out his legs. His knees protested and he was very glad he had decided to not walk down the hill. 

Hesitantly, Dai stepped forward and nosed at Suga’s thigh. The man lifted his head and pointedly rolled his shoulder, trying to ease away the pain. 

Dai laid down again, ears flat against his head, and he whined. It sounded like an apology. 

Suga sighed, then pushed himself up into sitting and pat at the beast’s head. “Make sure I’m not a pretzel when you make me your pillow. That wasn’t comfortable.” Dai licked at his hand and Suga gave him a soft smile. “I know you didn’t mean to. But it hurt, okay?”

With extra care, Suga hauled himself up into standing, then grabbed his phone and wallet. “I’ll be back in an hour.” 

He turned to leave the bedroom, but before he could reach the door, he was suddenly jerked back by his waist. 

Suga looked over his shoulder to see Dai behind him, the ends of his flannel shirt in between the beast’s jaws. Dai gave another tug, actually hauling a shocked Suga back a centimeter or so without managing to rip his shirt. 

They locked eyes, Suga knowing his own were comically wide, then Dai pulled again, dragging Suga further back into the room. 

“Dai, let go,” Suga commanded, grabbing at his shirt and trying to pull it from Dai’s mouth. The beast didn’t let go, instead turning his ears back and taking a few steps back. Suga tried to dig his heels into the floor to stop from moving, but he ended up just sliding to where Dai wanted him. 

“This isn’t funny, you’re going to rip my shirt.” 

Another tug. 

Suga clenched his jaw, then let go of his shirt and angled his arms behind him as the dog pulled on the garment again. It slid off Suga’s shoulders and Dai stumbled backwards at the lack of resistance. Suga huffed and started walking forward again.

He reached the entryway to the cabin before he was nearly bowled over again. Dai rushed past him, turning mid sprint to slide to a stop, and crashing into the front door. The entire wall rattled and his keys, which were on the table by the door, were knocked onto the floor. 

Dai glared up at Suga, his ears flat against his head, as he physically tried to block the door. Suga put his hands on his hips and returned the stare. 

“Dai, this is ridiculous. Stop it.” Dai lowered his head but otherwise didn’t move. “You need to move, I am going to the store. I can give you pets later, but right now you are not earning them.” 

When the beast refused to listen, Suga scowled. He snatched up his boots and keys, then then turned and started to march back towards the bedroom. Dai took off after him, thudding past him in an attempt to reach the room first. 

But that had been Suga’s plan. He turned mid step and sprinted back towards the front door. He heard the heavy footsteps behind him, but he managed to reach the door first. He threw it open and rushed out, slamming it behind him. 

He heard Dai crash into the door, saw how the entire building shook with the force of it.

“I’ll be back in an hour!” He called out as he tugged on his boots. Behind him, Dai began to scratch frantically at the door while whining and crying out for him. 

Suga hoped he didn’t damage the door; he’d have to pay to replace or fix it. 

The bike was waiting for him down beside the stairs and Suga grabbed onto the handles and began to wheel it towards the road down the mountain. As he got closer to the path, he realized with a scowl that somewhere along the way during his scuffle with Dai, he had lost his tote bags. 

He liked his totes because they kept him from buying more than he could carry.

When Suga got to the road, he mounted the bike and began to pedal until he got enough momentum to let him coast down the mountain. His knees ached slightly at having to bend, but he didn't want to risk stretching out his legs and losing control of the bike. He was guiding the thing in a zig zag motion to keep himself from building up too much speed, but there was always the chance need have to straighten out and then gravity would kick in. Or something.

Suga didn't quite know how it worked.

As he passed what he knew to be the halfway mark down the mountain, the base of his skull began pound. He briefly closed his eyes, wondering if he had smacked his head when Dai had knocked him over. Or maybe it was being in bright light after being locked away in the cabin for so long. 

Whatever it was, maybe there was no reason, it felt like the start of a nasty headache. He'd have to get plenty of medicine and cold packs at the store.

The throbbing grew as he got closer to town, creeping up and around his head into it was behind his eyes. It made them feel sensitive to the light and he wanted to hide his face in his hands, but he couldn't while he was on the bike. He narrowed his eyes into a squint, instead, hoping it would ease the pain. It did nothing to help, only made it harder to see. 

By the time he got to the main road of the town, he could barely keep his eyes open. Each pulse had his head spinning, and their frequency was increasing. He had never experienced a headache like the one plaguing him and didn't even know they could come on so strongly and so quickly.

Maybe it was a migraine? 

If he could stand to look at his phone, he'd text Oikawa, ask him about symptoms. He knew his friend got them often.

Suga slowed the bike to a stop and dismounted it with a stumble. 

The world didn't so much spin as it did completely blur together. Suga closed his eyes tightly and leaned against the bike for support as he got his bearings. He knew he was standing, and not moving, but he felt like he was on a ship, swaying back and forth. It was dizzying. 

Maybe it wasn't a headache or a migraine; maybe he had pushed himself too much while still recovering from being sick. He had felt better around the house, but maybe the cleaning and running and jerking off had been too much for his body. He should have rested.

What if that had been why Dai hadn't wanted him to leave? Maybe he had known. He had never acted so aggressively towards Suga before, tugging on his clothes or blocking the doorway. He had been desperate to keep Suga home. He must have known something had been wrong. 

He should have listened to Dai. He had been stupid not to.

But none of that mattered at the moment, because Suga was in town and suffering. He needed to sit down and rest. Gather up his energy.

The convenience store had a little bench outside and Suga could buy a candy bar and a tea and sit. 

He hadn't eaten since the night before and that probably was not helping his headache. It might have even been the cause.

He just needed to walk himself to the store. It felt like a bigger task than it was, with how his head was throbbing. He took a step and wanted to throw up. He was suddenly grateful he had nothing in his stomach. 

Suga leaned heavily into the bike as he forced himself to shuffle towards the store, not even able to pick his feet fully off of the ground. He told himself he'd feel better when he sat down and it was the only thing to keep him going.

He practically collapsed onto the bench when he got close enough, the bike clattering to the ground. He was lucky to be sitting up right, he thought as he buried his face into his hands. He pushed the balls of his palm into his eyes, trying to will away the insistent pounding. It didn't help.

The world stopped swaying at least, though maybe that had something to do with Suga had stopped swaying. He was sure he had been swaying as he walked. 

He hunched over more on himself, thinking maybe if he kind of urged blood up into his head it would help. Putting his head into his lap usually helped when his eyes started hurting from staring at his laptop too long. 

Part of him wanted to flop over and lay down on the bench until the aching stopped, but the still rational part of his mind told him someone would probably call the police on him. But laying down seemed like such a nice idea, under a large blanket, preferably. He hadn’t realized how chill the air was until he had stopped moving. 

It was strange, because the sun was shining brightly and since the storm, things had been slowly warming up. But perhaps a cold snap was coming. Either way, Suga was cold and his hands were starting to shake against his face and it was starting to make things worse. 

Down the building, the door to the shop opened with a too loud ding. There were footsteps then a soft gasp that grated Suga’s ears.

“Writer-san?”

Suga moved a hand away from an eye and looked to his left. Abe was standing at the entrance to the store, broom in her hand. She gasped again, then pushed open the door she had just came out of and half leaned inside. 

“Yuuji! Yuuji, come here! And bring napkins!”

Suga closed his eyes tightly at the yelling, his head protesting the noise by echoing all of it, paired with angry throbs. 

He heard Abe move in front of him but didn’t look up. Warm hands touched his bare arms, moving up slowly to grasp his wrists. 

“Oh my goodness, Writer-san, you’re freezing.” She whispered, before gently tugging at him, wanting him to move his hands away. “Let me see. Did you fall off your bike?”

“What…?” Suga asked, not sure why she was asking that. Why would she have thought that? He had a blinding headache that had nothing to do with his bike. But he let her pull his hands away from his face, keeping his eyes squeezed shut.

“Oh gods, where is that boy? Here, keep leaning forward.”

She took his right hand and guided it back to his face, maneuvering his fingers so he was pinching the bridge of his nose. Being moved around like he was some sort of puppet gave him a sense of vertigo and dizziness swept through him. 

“It will be okay, Writer-san. Just keep breathing normally.”

He had no idea what she was going on about. How could breathing help his headache? How did she even know he had one?

The door to his left dinged again, but the sound was drowned out by Yuuji talking.

“Sorry, I had to open a new - oh holy fuck!” The other man’s voice got very high and panicked and it made Suga cringe. “Dude, what the fuck happened?!”

“Language, Yuuji!”

Suga turned and half opened his eyes at the exclamation, not understanding why they were shouting, they really didn't need to shout.

Then he felt something dribble over his lip. Something warm and slick and viscous. 

His hand dropped slowly from where it was on his nose down to his lips, his palm dragging over his chin and smearing what Suga knew had to be blood. He pulled his hand away once his fingers grazed his lips and his eyes widened at the amount of blood covering his hand. 

His eyes dropped to his lap and saw that the hem of his shirt and his jeans were stained with blood from where he had been leaning over. There was a small pool of it gathered in the dip where his legs were pressed together.

His slowly brought his hand back to his nose, his movements suddenly feeling very sluggish and heavy. 

“Oh.” Was all he could say. 

Headaches and bleeding from the nose sounded like a bad combination, but he really couldn't find it in him to care. His head was hurting so much and he really, really just wanted to lay down. That was probably not a good thing. 

“Here, let me.” 

Abe had snatched the napkins from Yuuji, tearing them up and starting to push them against Suga’s nostrils. He moved his fingers to help shove the napkins into his nose. 

“Did you fall?” Abe asked and Suga was sure she was repeating herself. He meant to shake his head, but he wasn't sure if he really did or not. The world spun either way.

“No,” he mumbled for good measure. 

“Are you dizzy?” 

“Yeah...”

Suga closed his eyes again as Abe gingerly felt around the bridge of his nose, looking for who knew what.

“That's not a good sign. We need to get you to the hospital. Can you walk?”

It took him a moment to process what she had said but when he did, Suga’s stomach lurched. He jerked away from Abe’s hands as panic and fear filled him at the mere thought of going to the hospital. He didn’t want to go near one, didn’t want to be stuck in a white room that smelled like hand sanitizer while he was poked and prodded. He didn’t want to be locked away and forced to repeat his medical history to strangers. He didn’t want to lose anymore time than he already had for editing. 

He was bleeding and dizzy and probably couldn’t stand up without falling over, but he wasn’t sick. He didn’t need to go to the hospital. 

He just needed food, that was all. That was why he was dizzy. 

He just needed to eat something then go back up to the cabin. 

The idea of going back into the woods, to the cabin, and the lush bed waiting for him sent a tingle of warmth up his spine. 

That was what he needed to do, what he wanted to do. 

He just needed to be able to voice it without throwing up stomach bile. 

He squeezed his already shut eyes together tightly, trying to focus his body and thoughts while his skull throbbed worse than before. 

“I don’t,” Suga croaked, his voice sounding so far away to his ears, “I don’t need to go to the doctors. I’ve been sick and haven’t eaten in awhile. That is why I’m dizzy.”

“And the nosebleed?” Yuuji asked from in front of him. He must have moved to kneel by his mother. 

Suga didn’t respond right away because he didn’t have an answer. He knew that Oikawa, who also had his fair share of bad headaches, also suffered from an obscene amount of unexplained nosebleeds. So many, in fact, it had almost become a running joke. The doctors he had gone to had never found a reason for them, but he had been told as long as they stopped on their own, they were fine. Maybe Suga was suffering from the same random phenomenon. 

He didn’t want to go to the hospital. 

So he lied. 

“I get them time to time,” he mumbled, hoping he sounded convincing. It was hard to think, hard to lie, when his would not stop pounding. He just wanted to lay down. 

A hand brushed against his cheek before lightly patting it. “Okay, dear,” Abe whispered. “We’ll get you something to eat then Yuuji can drive you back up the mountain.”

Suga gave a fraction of a nod, or hoped he did. There was shuffling in front of him and he assumed Yuuji was getting up and going back into the store. 

“Did you need anything else from inside?” 

Suga knew he had come down the mountain for a reason, but he couldn't for the life of him remember the mental list he had made. He dug the heels of his palms into his eye sockets. It was too hard to try to remember. 

Abe touched his shoulder. “It is okay, just rest. Yuuji will be back in a moment.”

Suga grunted an affirmative, not particularly caring at the moment. Abe seemed to respect that he didn't wish to speak. Maybe she had caught on he had a headache.

He didn't hear Yuuji return and jerked in surprise when something warm and soft was draped over his shoulders. He dropped his hands into lap and forced open his eyes.

A red bomber jacket was around him, attempting to keep him warm. It didn't really work, but he pulled it closer, hoping it would. 

Yuuji knelt beside his mother, holding a bottle of a dark colored juice and some sort of protein bar. The other man smiled at Suga, something bright but soft, then he opened up the juice and offered it out.

“Take a few sips of this first.”

Suga took the bottle in a shaky hand and obeyed the order. The juice was shockingly tart and it sent a shiver up his spine. He couldn't identify what type it was, but it wasn't disgusting despite its intensity, so he continued to slowly sip at it. When he was about halfway through with the drink, Yuuji reached out and gently took the bottle from Suga’s hands. He replaced it with the already opened protein bar. 

He stared down at the food and frowned. He knew he needed to eat, that it would probably help with the headache, but it was unappealing. Chewing seemed like it would agitate the pain more.

He looked back up to Yuuji and Abe, who are watching him with sympathy. Yuuji gave him another little smile and took back the protein bar, returning the juice. 

“Finish this, then I'll take you back up the mountain, yeah?”

Once again the idea of going back to the cabin gave him a pleasant feeling in the sea of pain. He managed to nod, then gave a weak smile to the family in front of him. 

“You are being so kind,” he mumbled, looking between them. “Thank you so much.” They did not need to be so sweet, caring for him as they were and offering to take him back up to the cabin. It was incredibly kind and he had no idea how he would even repay it. 

Abe waved off his thanks with her own smile and a pat to the hand that wasn’t holding the juice. “You are a good man, Writer-san. You should take care of yourself.” 

“She is hoping to get a cameo in your book,” Yuuji teased in a stage whisper. Abe gasped, then smacked her son on the shoulder.

“Yuuji!”

The antics, the playfulness, made Suga blink and Suga found himself giving a small huff of laughter despite his headache.

“I don’t think you’d want to be in it. It’s a horror novel, people die.” 

Yuuji laughed at how flustered his mother looked at the comment, then he pushed himself up into standing. “Finish the juice,” he reminded Suga, “I’m going to go warm up the car.” He placed a hand on Suga’s shoulder and squeezed, before turning and disappearing behind the store.

Suga started to sip at the juice again, closing his eyes as he did. His head was still pounding, screaming at him to lay down and curl into the jacket wrapped around him. He knew it would take time for the juice to make him feel better, if it would, but he would have liked something instant. He thought of asking for medicine, but dismissed it, not wanting to overreach Abe’s kindness. 

Instead he focused on trying to finish his drink.

“It looks like your nose stopped bleeding,” Abe said suddenly. Suga slowly opened his eyes and blinked at her, taking a moment to understand the words. He reached up and felt the napkins that had been barely shoved up his nose. They fell down into his lap at the slightest touch, soaked through except for the very tips. 

“That's good. One step to feeling better,” the woman said, her voice light and hopeful. Suga gave a tiny nod in agreement. 

Yuuji came back around from the behind the store just as Suga finished the juice. The other man didn't say anything, just held out his hand to help Suga up into standing. Abe took the empty bottle from him with another soft smile, then Suga grabbed onto Yuuji. He realized for the first time that Yuuji was in a sleeveless shirt and seemed unbothered by the apparent cold. His skin was warm. Suga curled his fingers tighter around Yuuji’s hand, wanting to absorb his warmth. 

He was hauled up into standing and Suga was grateful he had closed his eyes. He felt like he was rocking back and forth and he was sure if he had been able to see, the world would have swirled together and he would have thrown up all the juice he had drank. 

It took a few moments for the world to settle, and Yuuji kept him steady while it did. When he was ready, Suga nodded and Yuuji began to lead him towards the alley to the back of the shop. He heard Abe follow them.

“Get lots of rest, Writer-san. And be sure to eat something proper.”

“I will, thank you, Abe-san.”

She pat his shoulder then exchanged a few quiet words with Yuuji he didn't bother to try to focus on. He heard the distant ding of the shop door a few moments later, indicating she had gone back inside. 

“The car is around back,” Yuuji told him softly as the turned down the alley. Suga nodded in understanding just as he felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. 

It felt like someone was watching him. 

Suga took a chance of the world spinning to look over his shoulder. 

Across the deserted street, under the awning of another shop and half encased in shadow, a man was watching them. He had a shaved head, and was wearing a black track suit jacket with matching pants; the jacket was unzipped and he was shirtless underneath. The man was glaring at them and his mouth was turned down into a vicious scowl. 

Suga turned back to Yuuji and tugged at his hand. 

“Who's that?” he asked the other man, not feeling very comfortable with how the man across the street had looked so angry towards them. 

Yuuji turned with him, looking around the street. The man was gone, disappeared into the shadows. 

“There was a guy,” Suga tried to explain, “he looked upset, at us.” 

“A lot of people have natural annoyed faces here. Small town syndrome,” Yuuji supplied, turning their hands so he could guide Suga down the alley. Suga shuffled after him, accepting the explanation but fully. It had truly felt like the guy had been glaring at them. 

There was a small parking lot behind the convenience store, with only a handful of cars parked in it. Yuuji’s easily stood out; it was the newest model by at least a decade and a massive crow was perched on the roof. Suga recognized the bird as the smaller of the pair that Dai played with as it spread its wings and cawed angrily. It flapped its wings a few times before taking off and disappearing over the buildings.

“What the fuck,” Yuuji exclaimed, letting go of Suga’s hand to rush forward and inspect his car for damage. “That is the biggest fucking crow I've ever seen!”

Suga said nothing, knowing there were bigger birds, and instead wrapped his arms around his torso to try to keep warm and shuffled forward after Yuuji. The other man was on his tiptoes and looking at the hood of his car in horror.

“It scratched the paint!” 

Yuuji rocked back with a groan then yanked open the passenger side door. “Stupid bird.”

“Maybe it looked that your car was shiny?” Suga offered quietly, slipping under Yuuji’s arm so he could sit down. His head was still pounding, and the shrill cry of the crow had not been very pleasant. He wanted to close his eyes and think about not moving for a bit. 

Yuuji closed the door, taking care to not slam it, then went around the vehicle to get into the driver’s side. The car thankfully was silent as it started up and Suga could barely feel it vibrating under him. He leaned his head back against the neck rest and sighed through his nose. He could feel the car start to move around him, but it didn't make him feel sick. He was grateful for it.

A weight was suddenly on his thigh and Suga cracked his eyes open and looked down through his lashes. Yuuji’s hand was there, skillfully avoiding the blood stains, and his thumb was rubbing what was meant to be a soothing little circle against him.

“You sure you don't want to go to the hospital?” Yuuji asked. 

“Yeah,” Suga croaked, looking out the window at the mountain they were heading towards. Something about even seeing the trees made his headache less intense. 

“Okay.”

Suga closed his eyes again, relaxing into the seat as they drove. As they climbed the mountain, as they entered the forest and got closer and closer to Suga’s bed, the pounding in his head dulled to something manageable. It was no longer screaming at him and making the world spin and blur. 

The juice must have been kicking in. 

Yuuji took his hand off of Suga’s thigh so that he could turn into the driveway off the cabin. As the car slowed to a stop, something occurred to Suga.

“My bike.” 

Yuuji glanced over to him, a smirk forming on his lips. “You discovered my dastardly plan to ensure seeing you again.” Suga blinked owlishly at him before his cheeks began to heat up as he realized the implications. Yuuji laughed, “No, no, it would have taken too long to put the seat down in my car and make it fit and you looked like you needed to be home.” He paused, then tilted his head and his smirk turned into something softer. “Plus, I figured you could message me what you had originally come down there for and I could bring it and your bike up to you.”

“I don’t have your mail address, though.” Suga pointed out, then he understood and he was pretty sure he was blushing. “Oh, that was smooth.”

“I pride myself.” 

Yuuji watched him for a moment, then shook his head, still smiling. “Huh. Even with blood smeared all over your face, you still manage to look cute when you blush.” 

“I...I what?”

Suga unbuckled his seatbelt and craned himself up so he could see his face in the rearview mirror. His eyes widened.

Drying blood was between his top lip and nose, and it had smeared and dripped down the side of his mouth and chin, making him look like he had eaten something incredibly raw and bloody. There were a few drops of blood splattered on one cheek, and around his eye, where he had placed his bloody hand, were more smears. He had blood in his eyebrow. And his skin was so pale, naturally and the fact he had been so sick, that the blood stood out even more. 

If he had been in his right mind, he might have thought he looked cool, and maybe would have taken a selfie, but he could only stare at himself and realize why the man in the shadows had been glaring at them. 

“Holy shit.” 

“I mean, it isn’t so bad. It is your blood and it just came from your nose. It will wash off easily,” Yuuji offered, trying to make Suga feel better while not understanding he wasn’t grossed out by it. 

“Yeah,” Suga whispered, reaching up to run a clean finger over the dried blood on his brow. He sunk back into his seat, then looked back to Yuuji. “Thank you, for the ride. And everything else.” 

“It's not a problem,” Yuuji responded, shifting in his seat as he grabbed his phone from his pocket. “Let me get your address.” 

Suga gave him his personal email, feeling a bit embarrassed with how silly it was. Oikawa had helped him come up with it and it had a pretty bad pun in it. Yuuji didn't seem to mind and typed out a message to Suga, sending it to him with a smile.

“There you go. Message me what you need from the store and I'll bring it and your bike back up.”

“That's a lot of work for you.” Suga mumbled, slightly embarrassed with the offer. It seemed like so much but Yuuji shrugged. 

“I don't mind. Do you need help getting up to the house?”

Suga shook his head. “I'll be okay I think.” He pushed open the car door, then gave Yuuji a smile. The other man nodded, then leaned back in his seat, pointedly looking at Suga and threw his arm over the other seat, his intention clear. He was going to stay and keep watch to make sure Suga got inside the cabin. 

Suga’s head did not spin when he got out of the car and he took it as a positive sign. 

His head pounded with each step, but it wasn't the jarring sensation he had felt in town. The headache was fading slowly, though he still very much wanted to lay down.

Getting up the stairs was a task, the steps were larger and going up instead of straight brought on a mild sense of vertigo. Yuuji made motions to get out of the car twice, but Suga waved him off. He was stubborn and didn't want to come off as weak, especially after Yuuji had already helped him so much. 

When he made it to the door, he raised his hand to the other man, and Yuuji offered his own wave as he started up the car again. 

Suga pushed open the front door, his stomach turning slightly as he remembered how he had slammed it when he had left. Dai had been distressed, and Suga had just left him. 

The dog had known something was wrong. Suga needed to apologize. 

But Dai wasn't waiting for him in the hallway. 

Suga toed off his boots and went towards the main room, calling out quietly. “Dai?”

There was no response and the unsettling feeling in his stomach returned. 

If Dai wasn't responding, maybe he had gotten fed up with Suga and his behavior and had left. It made sense. He should have known Dai didn't act out without reason. 

Suga ran his hand through his hair, his nerves making him start to feel dizzy again, and slightly nauseous. He turned on his heel and started towards the bedroom, hoping that Dai was resting in there. He wouldn't know what to do if Dai wasn't there. He didn't want to think about it; he had grown so close to Dai. 

His fears were put to rest as he reached the bedroom door.

Dai was curled on top of the bed, his muzzle buried into his tail. The beast seemed to be ignoring him, though his ears twitching gave away he was awake.

“Dai,” Suga whispered, relief filling him. He rushed towards the bed, not caring that his head spun with the sudden movement, and crawled into it. “Dai, please, I'm sorry.”

The dog looked up slowly, looking like he had been deeply asleep before Suga had come into the room. His tail gave a half hearted thump against the bed before the dog seemingly froze. Dai eyed Suga before scrambling into standing, a cautious, questioning boof coming from him. He took step towards Suga, rocking the bed as he did, but the motion didn't faze the man.

He knew what was worrying Dai and opened up his arms to the dog.

“I'm okay,” Suga explained quietly, “It was just a nosebleed.” He motioned for Dai to come forward and the beast did. Dai moved so he could sit in front of him and hook his head over Suga’s shoulder. It was a hug and Suga returned it, wrapping his arms around Dai’s neck and squeezing maybe a little too tightly. 

He turned and pressed his face into Dai’s fur. It was warm and the scent of it soothed the lingering panic in him.

“You knew I didn't feel well, didn't you? That I hadn't eaten and I was being dumb and I ignored you. I slammed a door on you. I'm sorry, Dai.” He whispered, pressing a kiss against the beast’s fur, emphasizing his words. “I'm sorry.”

Dai shifted, pushing closer against Suga’s chest while tilting his head to pull the man even closer. Suga leaned into and closed his eyes, at least until he felt the beast snuffling along his back. Dai pulled back enough so he could pointedly shove his nose into Suga’s shoulder, huffing loudly as he did.

Suga was still wearing Yuuji’s jacket and probably reeked of him. He loosened his hold on Dai to scratch at his ears. “I know you growled at him last time, but be nice when he comes by again. He took care of me when I got sick down in town and brought me back here.” 

Dai’s hackles twitched, like he wanted to growl at the statement, but he managed to hold it back. Instead he nosed at the edge of the collar, trying to push it off Suga’s shoulder. The man pulled the garment off and tossed it to the side, and Dai’s tail gave a faint wag. Suga smiled at him, running his hand up and down Dai’s neck. 

“I’m going to wash my face, then try to eat something. After, do you want to take a nap with me?” 

Dai responded by licking Suga’s cheek, the one that was not splattered in blood. A pleasant shiver ran down the man’s spine and the aching behind his eyes finally faded fully.

+++

There were embers in the hearth, glowing softly and giving off a pleasant heat. The room had long since faded into darkness, but Suga didn't mind. He was comfortable standing in front of the dying fire, enjoying its warmth. It made him feel safe.

He didn't jump when the floorboards creaked behind him or when a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and someone pressed their face into the side of his neck. 

“I should have told you sooner,” the person holding him whispered. Suga knew it was the recurring stranger from his dreams. He leaned back into the man's hold, relaxing into it. The stranger tightened his grip. “I was scared,” he admitted.

“Scared?” Suga asked, not sure what the man was talking about. But he wanted to soothe the man, help calm him, so he began to slowly trace his fingers on one of the arms around his waist. 

“I could not go after you. I’m too weak, still. I tried but I collapsed. I could not protect my Human.” The man pushed his nose against Suga’s throat, and Suga got the the impression the stranger was trying to absorb him. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You cannot leave.” The words sounded ominous, in theory, but the stranger said them with such despair, Suga didn’t find them threatening. Instead he danced his fingers down the man’s arm until he could take his hand. The stranger clung to him. 

“Why not?” 

“The connection is too strong,” the stranger whispered against him. His free hand slowly moved from around Suga’s waist to travelling up his stomach. Suga realized for the first time he was shirtless, as the stranger touched the scar on his torso. “There is still too much of it inside of you, keeping you alive. Your body has not recovered yet; the Life is what you feel inside of you. But when you went down the mountain, the connection strained, and it could not support you.”

“I thought I was connected to you? You said we had a bond?” 

The stranger chuckled against Suga’s throat, then gave him a soft squeeze, his hand flattening over the scar.

“You remember that? I was starting to think the block was too strong. I know you do not remember this when awake, or you would have figured it out by now.” The stranger hummed softly, the vibrations tickling Suga, before he addressed the questions. “Our bond is through the connection you have with the Life. I gave them some of mine so it could go to you. An exchange.”

“You gave your life for mine?” Suga asked, knowing he sounded skeptical. The stranger huffed against him.

“It does sound strange put like that,” he murmured, starting to run his fingers along the edges of Suga’s scar. It made the silver haired man shiver; he had never really let anyone touch it before. He was too self conscious. Maybe in dreams he was bolder. After all, none of it was real.

“Energy is maybe an easier way of describing it. Our life force. And yours is still pretty weak on its own, so it needs support. That is why your body started failing on you; the support you had was suddenly taken away and it was not strong enough to keep your body running.” 

“And how far is the reach of the support?” Suga questioned, not really understanding what the stranger was talking about, but humoring him slightly. The concept of some invisible force keeping him running like it was a battery seemed far fetched. 

“It is best you stay near the cabin.”

Suga hummed, then rolled his head back, resting it against the stranger’s shoulder. The man pulled Suga closer, flush against his chest, and his grip on his hip tightened. The exposed skin of his neck and shoulder was peppered with barely there kisses, and he relaxed under the affection. It seemed like a natural progression from the stranger holding him, even though they hadn't really crossed that barrier yet. 

“You said you collapsed?” Suga asked after a few moments, his hand skating up his stomach to touch the stranger’s, to lace their fingers together.

“Mhmm. My legs gave out on me. I have never given up my Life before, I did not realize it would take so long to build back up. I will be fine, soon. We both need rest.” The stranger nosed his way up Suga’s throat so he could nuzzle at the man's cheek. “You need to rest, my Human.”

“Aren't I resting, now? I'm asleep. This is a dream.”

“It is, but we could send you off into real dreams where you will get better rest. This puts some strain on your mind.”

“No, I like this. I want to stay like this for a while.”

“Of course. However long you want to stay like this, we can.”

“Then a little while longer, please.”

The arm around his waist tightened and a feather light kiss was pressed to Suga’s jaw.

“Of course, my Human.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Foxyena drew some wonderful art for me; everyone should check it out! [Here](https://68.media.tumblr.com/b7621e723ca09aa80ed7b0d30214433f/tumblr_ooh8b4iF3p1tfwrxco1_540.png)
> 
> && next chapter: Daichi finally reveals himself to Suga, outside of a Dream.


	8. Ginger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wanted to go into the darkness that was taking over his mind, for everything to stop.
> 
> So he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Graphic Content Warning: This chapter contains graphic gore related content. It starts at the scene change, marked with +++ and ends at 'When he paused, unable to take it'. However, the content is referenced for the rest of the chapter, but not graphically.**
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> A special thanks to [Kaiyou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiyou/pseuds/Kaiyou) for giving me ideas for this chapter and a super special amazing shout out to my new Beta, [Jaybyrds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaybyrds/pseuds/jaybyrds), without whom I would still be crying in a corner, bemoaning how short this chapter originally was.

The cabin was comfortably silent when Suga wasn't clacking away at his keyboard. Outside it had begun to rain, but it was still light enough it couldn't be heard through the closed windows. A storm was on the horizon, though. When Suga did lift his head up from his work, he could see the wind picking up, the trees closer to the cabin swaying more and more violently.

But for most of the day, Suga had kept his eyes on his screen. He had been determined to actually focus and edit his novel; he had wasted so much time napping and he had once again fallen behind. It was becoming an annoying trend.

Dai had helped him from becoming distracted and getting up by laying across his lap. When he became agitated or restless, he scratched at Dai’s ears and neck until he calmed. It allowed him push through not only through the first of the dreaded long chapters, but two shorter ones that followed it. He needed to get ahead of his schedule, just in case his body decided he needed to spend yet another afternoon napping.

Which was starting to become more and more appealing as the sky darkened early with the oncoming storm and Suga had been up since before sunrise. Lying down for just a little bit could help rejuvenate the energy Suga was rapidly losing. He had been staring at the same page of his manuscript, not processing a single word he had written, for well over ten minutes.

Suga turned his gaze down to Dai, who was snoozing happily in Suga’s lap. The beast was stretched out on the couch beside him, half turned on his side. Suga ran his fingers through the fur on the dog's neck, telling himself to not think about how nice it would be to start a fire, lay in front of it, and nap with Dai. Just as the beast loved to use Suga as a pillow, Suga loved to lay his head on Dai’s shoulder and sleep.

But he couldn't do that. He needed to get his head back into his work; needed to focus.

He needed coffee.

Suga pat at Dai’s shoulder, trying to rouse him. “Up, boy. I need a break.”

Dai cracked open an eye and twitched his ear up at Suga. The man frowned down at him and stroked his fur again. “Don't give me that, I'm just going to get some coffee. Then right back into this mess.” He glanced back to his laptop that sat on the arm of the couch. He glared at it. He had screwed himself over during one of the short chapters; instead of adding in details during the initial writing, he had made notes telling himself to do it later. He had forgotten about the fact he had done so, and it took longer to do than he planned for.

Dai gave him another look, probably rightfully not believing that Suga would just be getting coffee. But the man was determined and stubborn and his desire to get ahead of schedule outweighed his desire to wander off and get distracted. The beast yawned, then rolled and sat up with a stretch. Suga slipped out from under him, then gave Dai a pat on his flank after he grabbed his phone off the coffee table.

Once in the kitchen, Suga started the process of brewing way more coffee than he could fit into his mug. He planned to keep the pot of excess coffee warm so he could just get up and refill without having to make new coffee. The plan was to overload his body with caffeine so he couldn’t nap even if he wanted to. However, making such a large pot meant it would take time to drip.

Which was exactly why he had brought his phone along. If he stood in front of the coffee maker, looking at his phone, then he wouldn’t be tempted to wander off. He deserved credit or praise for his planning ahead.

Suga opened up his email first; eyeing the things he had been ignoring. Most of it wasn’t worth clicking, but there were a few invitations to events that looked promising, a message from Yuuji about when he should come by with Suga’s supplies and bike, and a slightly ominous untitled message from Kiyoko.

Suga eyed the latter, debating if his heart could handle reading anything she had sent him.

Then he very suddenly remembered the phone conversation they had had and the prospect of _Spherical_ being turned into a film.

He quickly opened up the email and read it. The first portion was an apology for the late communication; she and the producer who wished to make the film had had multiple, though short, video meetings and she had not wanted to send him anything until she had properly researched the man and the talks were productive.

The second half contained the details of the meetings; Kiyoko approved of the producer and his plan for the film adaption. He wanted to be true to the novel and had requested the Suga be the one to look over the scripts for approval. It was thrilling and Suga couldn’t help but grin at the idea of seeing his work in script form. It was a completely different type of writing and he could learn so much from it.

The next steps, Kiyoko told him, would be talks between the producer and the company financing the anthology. Once the studio approved of Suga’s story as an adaption, contracts and other legal things would be drawn up. Then they would go from there.

The adaptation of _Spherical_ was slowly becoming less of an idea and more of a real thing. It made Suga’s stomach bubble in excitement and inspired him to try to push forward with editing even more.

Kiyoko included a link to one of the producer’s social media pages, with samples of his works and three minute or less movies.

Suga clicked it and leaned back against the counter as he scrolled through it. The coffee behind him was still brewing, and he felt he had enough time before it finished to browse for a bit.

It would be a good little break.

He got absorbed in one video, a modern take of an American urban legend about someone receiving disturbing calls from a phone traced to being inside their own home. He had seen the old cinematic version, he knew the ending, but the two minute and thirty second video had him clutching his phone in anticipation and suspense. Something so simple as a phone call could be terrifying if done right, and the producer who wanted to adapt Suga’s work was clearly talented.

Suga couldn't wait to see what the man would do with his novel.

The coffee maker beeped and Suga, though he would be ashamed to admit it, jumped a little.

He poured a large mug of coffee, noting the bottle of creamer was almost empty, then took it and his phone back out into the main room. Dai had rolled onto his back and gone back to snoozing while Suga had been away. The man felt guilty for nudging the sleeping beast, but he had stretched out and left no room to sit.

Dai moved his head, but as soon as Suga had sat back down, the beast was back in his lap, using him as a pillow. It made Suga smile, and he scratched at Dai’s ears with the hand he had freed when he had put down his coffee. The dog smiled up at him before closing his eyes again.

Deciding he would finish his coffee before going back to editing, to give it time to kick in, Suga turned back to his phone and the producer’s social media page.

He focused on the pictures instead of the videos, not wanting to disturb Dai. Many of them were behind the scenes of the short films, including fake skulls and actors doused in special effects makeup. All of it was right up Suga’s alley and he ended up liking almost all of photographs.

He sipped idly at his coffee as he scrolled through the pictures. Some made him long for his apartment back in the city; the cabin was lovely but it was so proper and lacked anything that looked macabre. Though, Suga supposed, that aesthetic might scare off many renters, especially with how worn down the outside of the building was and the fact it was in the middle of the woods.

He still missed his decorative skulls and Gothic inspired decor.

He had only finished half of his drink by the time he reached the end of the producer’s page. Suga followed the page, then switched over to the main feed. He hadn't checked the site in a few days, and it was always a good way to waste time when drinking coffee.

He smiled at the image at the top of his feed. It was Oikawa. It was somehow always Oikawa because Oikawa was obsessed with posting, in the aisle of a pet shop, holding up a mini tank with a brightly-colored fish inside. He looked so excited and boyish and it made Suga smile.

The caption made him laugh.

‘Iwa-chan caved and let me get a pet! Her name is Ripley!’

Suga tapped the little heart under the picture, then began to scroll again. He went right by a few pictures, not interested in them really. He followed a lot people, but in reality he only cared about a handful; mostly his best friend and his mother.

He came across one of his mother's postings and couldn't help but smile wider. She posted sporadically and never tagged anything, but she had gained a nice little following. All of her photographs were of her garden and most were out of focus, but the likes were always in the hundreds.

The newest was of some sprouts coming out of the soil, with a cute little caption of ‘I forgot what I planted here.’

Suga’s cheeks hurt from grinning as he added a comment to the picture, saying it would be a nice surprise when it bloomed.

He shared the picture to one of his other social media pages, bragging about how cute his mother was, before returning to browsing. He liked a few more of Oikawa’s pictures, and a rare posting from Kenma’s account, as he finished up his coffee. Once empty, he set the mug onto the coffee table.

He decided he'd scroll back up to look at his mother’s picture again, for inspiration, before going back to editing.

As he went back up his feed, a picture he had previously ignored caught his eye. He stopped scrolling to stare at it.

It was simple.

Two hands slightly overlapping one another on a checkered tablecloth, the hand on top slightly grasping the one below it. The lighting was low, like candle light, and the image was slightly blurred, but it was clear the focus was the matching golden rings the hands had.

Suga gave a soft coo. He was a bit of a sucker for romantic things, and went to like the post. His fingers froze when he saw not only the caption but the username of the account. He thought he had unfollowed it months ago, but it was so unactive he must have forgotten to actually do it.  

 **'greathorned.ace** keiji said yes!’

Suga stared down at the words, knowing what they said, what they implied, but unable to process them. They couldn’t be right, they couldn’t be true. They couldn’t be.

His phone had to be glitching, showing the wrong caption for the picture, or giving the wrong username. He clicked on the bolded text, hoping it would lead him to a different page.

His heart thudded loudly as Bokuto’s profile loaded, showing his brief description and the measly five pictures he had uploaded. The most recent was the photograph of the two hands. Suga brought it back up to view.

The hand on the bottom was most definitely Bokuto’s; large palm and thick fingers with chewed up nails and hints of callouses on what was visible of the pad of his thumb. Suga could see the scar on the knuckle of his middle finger, from when he had cut himself trying to help Suga move his couch into his apartment. They had had to go to the emergency room to get stitches because it wouldn’t stop bleeding. They had gotten ice cream after and Suga had dropped his on his new couch.

The hand clutching Bokuto’s had to be Akaashi’s. The man had the prettiest hands Suga had ever seen, long and slender with perfectly groomed nails that had a faint, shimmering nail polish on them. It was a pale natural colour, probably called ‘painted rose’ or ‘bubble bath’, one that Suga could never pull off if he ever wanted to wear nail polish. The slight tension in the muscles of his hand showed he was gripping Bokuto’s hand a little tighter than he wanted to appear to be. He had probably been emotional when the picture was taken and had tried to hide it.

Suga’s eyes flicked to the date under the picture, wanting to see how long ago it had been posted. His heart dropped to his stomach and he felt empty. It was dated as the twenty-third, the day before Suga had fallen ill. His hand went up to cover his mouth, to force back the strangled noise that tried to escape his throat. He could feel the tears that had already started to fall from his eyes.

Bokuto had been engaged to Akaashi when he had repeatedly called Suga to make sure he was okay. He had been engaged when he had called almost thirty times and had sent nearly one hundred and ninety messages.

Suga dropped his phone, not caring that it slipped and clattered onto the floor, and used both hands to cover his mouth.

He felt like throwing up.

He didn't understand. He didn't understand why Bokuto had done such a thing when he clearly had other things to focus on. Why had Bokuto cared? Why had he even bothered?

It didn't make any sense; Bokuto had never cared about him like he had cared about Akaashi.

Suga was brought out of his shock and confusion by a gentle nudge to his hand. He opened his eyes, not even realizing he had closed them, and saw Dai only centimeters from his face. The beast gave a soft questioning whine.

With shaking hands, Suga reached out to bury his fingers into the fur of Dai’s neck. The dog pushed into the touch, leaning forward to give the man's cheek a small lick.

The small affectionate gesture broke him.

The sob he had been trying to hold back bubbled up and out of his throat.

“They are engaged,” he was barely able to choke out. “They are engaged and he still called.”

Dai pressed his nose into Suga’s cheek and huffed gently. Suga didn't know what the gesture meant, couldn't even try to figure out, but he turned anyways and buried his face into Dai’s shoulder.

“Engaged?” He whispered, “They are already engaged? He couldn't even…” He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his face more forcefully into Dai. “It's been six months.”

The beast pressed himself closer to Suga, almost crawling into his lap. Suga turned his grip, squeezing maybe too tightly.

“He must really love him,” he mumbled, turning his head and closing his eyes. “I knew he did. I always knew. I just thought, that maybe… maybe he'd realize. But I was stupid, wasn't I? I've always been stupid over him.”

Suga curled his fingers into Dai’s fur, not even trying to wipe away the tears streaming down his face. He couldn't have stopped then if he tried.

“I knew before we started dating, I think. Everyone but him knew. Kou was always oblivious to his feelings for him. I thought it was cute, he was so head over heels for Akaashi.” His heart panged at the memory. “I just wanted to be with someone, I never meant to fall for him. But he's like this whirlwind, I don't think I ever stood a chance.” He paused for a moment before more words started to pour from him. He had never told anyone, not even Oikawa, all of his feelings regarding the relationship. He had always been ashamed.

But Dai wouldn't judge him, only comfort him.

“I didn't want to give him up. He was the first person to ever...I don't know. To touch me like that? I wasn't a virgin when we got together but he made me feel like it. I'd never been in love with someone before. Being with him, it was addictive. He wasn't in love with me, but he cared. He wanted to be with me. We were good together, and I thought...I thought maybe he'd fall for me, too.” Suga leaned against Dai, resting almost all his weight on the beast. Dai took it easily.

“Oikawa, Tooru told me to end it. He said it wasn't fair to either of us, but I never listened. I wanted to live in my fantasy. That's what Tooru always told me. ‘You are living in a fantasy.’ He wasn't wrong, but he was the only one who kept telling me the truth.” Suga paused again, his voice starting to shake too much to continue. He wasn't bawling, though he felt like he was on the verge. Talking, oddly enough, was helping him from going completely over the edge into a sobbing mess. Though, he wasn't sure how much longer that would last.

He took a breath, trying to steady himself, before starting again. He just wanted to get it all of his chest. “Akaashi thought we were good together, he said I made Kou happy. It took me a year to realize Akaashi loved him, too. I asked him about it. I wasn't angry I just...I wanted to know. I didn't want him to hate me. He didn't. He knew Kou loved him but he didn't want to force Kou to confront his feelings. He thought, rightfully I guess, that he wouldn't take it so well, that he'd feel guilty about leading me on. He just wanted Kou to be happy, and I did that. He said he'd support whatever decision I made. And I was a selfish bastard who didn't want to give him up yet, but I told myself that when Kou realized his feelings for Akaashi, I'd let him go like I should have done the moment I realized he'd never love me.”

Suga turned his face slightly, burying his nose into Dai’s fur and inhaling the comforting scent. It hurt, all of it hurt so much; his stomach was knotting and his chest felt hollow and cold. Tears were still streaming down his face and he was sure he was getting them and snot all over Dai. Not that the beast cared; he turned so his head was over Suga’s shoulder and he was giving him a mock hug.

“I messed it up,” he admitted after a few moments, his voice breaking as he did. “We decided to move in together, Kou’s lease was up and he didn't want to stay in his apartment. We started to look around together. He'd been more...domestic with me lately. Dinners just to be together, staying over without sex. We’d even gone to work events together, as a proper couple. It started feeling like he was showing me off; that he...felt more than he said. Then, I fucked it all up. If I had just...stayed quiet, we'd probably still be together, in a cute apartment.”

Suga swallowed the lump forming in his throat and curled his fingers tightly against Dai. “I told him I loved him. I don't know why. I just...did. We were walking home and it just felt right. And he looked at me and smiled and my heart had...I don't think I'd ever felt so light. I knew he was going to say it back. And he did, but...I think I'll have the exact moment forever etched into my memory. We were by the electronics store. There were a lot of neon lights. He looked at me and said ‘I love you, too, Keiji.’” Dai stilled under him and it just emphasized how much Suga had begun to shake.

“I don't think he realized it at first. He was just beaming at me and then I saw it kind of...click on his head. I'm ninety nine percent sure my soul left my body because I don't know how I didn't just...break down. I think it was because I knew. I knew he didn't...not me anyways. He started to freak out and I just...comforted him. Told him it was alright. I knew he loved Akaashi, everyone knew. And I was happy he had finally figured it out. He kept trying to deny it, claim that he had been caught off guard, he had been thinking about a joke Akaashi had told him, so he had gotten flustered. But you could tell, he was realizing it. He finally properly said it. He was horrified; ‘oh my god, I love Keiji.’” Suga pressed his face hard into Dai’s shoulder, the memory starting to become too overwhelming. He could remember everything perfectly. The broken smile Bokuto had, the tears the man had begun to shed. He could remember it all and he wasn't sure if talking was helping at all at this point, but he had started, so he might as well finish.

“I helped him home and told him at the door that maybe we shouldn't see each other for a few days. I was...I don't know, going to be kind, give him time to process everything. But he's smarter than people give him credit for. He asked if I was going to break up with him after those few days. I told him yes, because I couldn't lie to him. It just hurt him more. He hugged me. Kissed me. Apologized so many times. I loved him so much, but I knew he wasn't mine. He's never been mine. He'd always been Akaashi’s. And I.” He hesitated, thinking a sob was going to come but it didn't. “I was never mad at him. At myself, so much. At the situation, yeah. But never either of them. They're good people, and they will be...they are good together. I've anyways been jealous of it. Jealous of Akaashi. I thought, maybe, if I had met Bo sooner, before Akaashi, he could have loved me. He could have loved me…”

The sob that hadn't come earlier burst from his throat and a new wave of tears started as the realization hit him that Bokuto was never going to love him. Part of him, some foolish stupid part, had thought maybe Bokuto would have realized he did have feelings for Suga after they had broken up. He had never really listened to it, knowing it was far fetched, but now that part hit him full force. Bokuto loved Akaashi, had asked him to marry him after only being together a few months. Suga could have never even imagined Bokuto proposing to him, even in his wildest fantasy.

Bokuto had never loved him.

And now, he most definitely never would.

Suga never had stood a chance, not against Akaashi, or anyone else. It was a wonder Bokuto had even dated him.

He was physically attractive, he knew that. _Pretty_ was the term people used for him because he came off so frail. He was pale and had unnaturally colored hair, though it was natural. He was sick, his body couldn't protect itself so he always had to be careful. He had never socialized at key points in his development, so he was awkward. He was extremely selfish and he thought too highly of himself just because he was a published author. He only gave to charities that related to him. He didn't even visit his mother that often.

He was a horrible person.

“I just thought,” Suga found himself whispering into Dai’s fur, “that maybe, one day, he'd love me too. Is that so bad of me? I just wanted him to love me. I just, I thought I was good enough. Good enough to be loved. I just wanted to be loved. I'm not good enough. I've never been good-”

He was cut off by Dai pulling away quickly, and the sudden brightness of the room had Suga closing his eyes tightly. The couch in front of him creaked and shifted and for a panicked moment, Suga thought Dai had left him, but then something was touching his leg.

Suga opened his eyes in time to see a man lean forward and capture him in a hard kiss. The man’s lips were chapped; that was the first thing Suga noticed about him. His lips were chapped, he was naked and cupping Suga’s cheek with a large hand, and he had appeared out of thin air where Suga’s dog had just been.

When Suga didn't respond to the kiss, still in complete shock over it, the man opened his eyes. Suga hadn't noticed they were closed.

Familiar amber eyes looked back at him.

The man was Dai.

Somehow.

Suga didn't want to know how.

He wanted to run.

His body was acting before his mind had fully caught up with what was going on. He drew back his arm just slightly, then jabbed it forward as hard as he could, hitting the man just under the ribs.

The man pulled back with a pained cry and Suga took his chance. He turned and scrambled over the arm of the couch, knocking his laptop onto the ground in the process, and took off towards the nearest door.

It was to the second bedroom. He had never really gone in it, only to check what it was, but he knew it only had one door. He slammed it behind him, turned the lock, then fell to his knees, his legs having failed him.

He crawled towards the bed, wanting to get behind it and away from the door. Away from whoever was on the other side of it.

Once Suga was securely against the bed, he wrapped his arms around his knees, his chest heaving. Tears were still streaming down his face, though no longer from heartbreak. He tried to take a steadying deep breath, but it didn't help his panic.

He didn't understand what was going on, what was happening. He didn't know who the strange man in the cabin was or what he wanted.  

His first reaction had been the man was Dai, but that couldn't be true. Dai was a dog. Dai couldn't turn into a human. He wasn't in one of his stories.

The man must have knocked the beast out somehow before assaulting Suga, and he just hadn't seen it, hadn't seen Dai while he was fleeing.

He could be in danger.

The panic in Suga grew and it became hard to breathe. He turned his head left and right, trying to find something to use as a weapon. There was nothing. The room was free of pointless decoration and it didn't even have a lamp; the lights were embedded in the ceiling.

He didn't have anything. No weapon, no phone. He was useless to save himself, to save Dai. He had never been particularly strong or fast. He's never done sports, too sick to really get into that sort of thing.

He was useless.

Breathing became too hard. His lungs couldn't get enough air.

Gods, he was useless and starting to have a panic attack.

Behind him, on the other side of the bed, the door began to rattle. The man was trying to get into the room.

Suga covered his mouth with his hands, trying to hide his struggle to breathe between sobs.

The door rattled again, then stopped. The man seemed to realize it was locked and he couldn't get through easily.

The next noise had Suga freezing.

The man's voice was deep, gentle and concerned. “Sugawara? Please open the door, I did not mean to frighten you.”

Suga tightened his hands over his mouth, fingers digging into his cheek. How did the man know his name? Did he know Suga? Was he from town?

“Sugawara, please. I am sorry. The way you were talking-”

Suga dropped his hands from his mouth, confusion overwhelming his fear for a moment. “Who are you?!”

The man didn't answer right away. The door creaked, like someone was leaning against it, then after a moment the man gave a small, sad laugh.

“You still do not… my name is Sawamura Daichi,” the man said.

The name sounded familiar, Suga had heard it before, he knew he had, but he couldn't place it. But that didn't catch his attention; what did was the man’s first name. It sounded so much like the name of his dog.

It was too much of a coincidence.

Suga hugged his knees closer to his chest, wanting to disappear.

It had to be a dream. He had fallen asleep while editing and it was all a horrible dream.

“I will not hurt you,” the man, Sawamura, said softly, “Can you open the door, please?”

“Why?” Suga asked, resting his forehead on his knees. He was pretty sure he had whispered the question, that it was broken with crying, but Sawamura had heard him anyways.

“To talk. I feel I should explain things to you now, properly.”

“I don't want to.”

He didn't want to hear whatever the man had to say, didn't want to open the door. He wanted the man to go away, to leave him alone. He wanted to have his breakdown about Bokuto being engaged in peace, not try to process that and the stranger.

If he had been able to actually think, and not have been in the middle of trying to keep his heart from falling apart, he wouldn't have stupidly run into a room with one exit and cowered behind the bed. It had seemed safe at first but it was really a trap.

Suga reached up to grip at his hair, his breathing becoming erratic. He needed to calm down. Think. Shift gears, bury his emotions down in the deepest darkest part of him, and find a way to get out of the situation he had gotten himself in.

The room had a window, but it wasn't a full wall one like the one is his bedroom. It was a standard window and looked like it didn't open. He could try to break it. That was his best course of action.

There was nothing to throw at it, though. He could try to break it using his elbow, but the glass looked thick.

But he had to try.

He unwrapped his arms from around his knees and pushed himself up into standing. He was still struggling to breathe, feeling like if he had to move too much he would pass out, but he was determined. He turned to face the bed, face the door, and reached for one of the plush pillows. As he pulled it out of its case, he eyed the door.

The man’s shadow was under it. He was waiting for Suga, to open the door, to say he would talk to him, but Suga refused.

Once the pillow was free, Suga tossed it back onto the bed, keeping the case. He glanced at the bed, noting the heavy comforter. If his plan didn’t work, he had a back up, something he had used in one of his stories. It hadn’t worked for the character, but maybe he would be luckier; after all, he didn’t have a slightly sadistic narrator writing his life.

He really hoped he could break the window, because tossing the comforter onto the man when he opened the door, then bolting past him while he struggled with it was not the best of backups. But it was all he had.

Suga took a deep breath, still barely getting any air and his heart hammering in his throat, then turned to move towards the window. When he pushed back the curtains he nearly screamed.

The two giant crows were perched on the balcony railing just outside the window, watching him.

For some reason they weren’t comforting. They made him feel trapped between them and the man behind the door.

Suga made a shooing motion at them, but the birds just slowly blinked at him. Realizing they weren’t going to go away, he sighed, then moved forward until his knees were touching the wall under the window. Then he turned around and slowly wrapped the pillowcase around the crook of his arm, padding his elbow. He took another deep breath, then raised his arm. He tested to make sure his elbow would actually hit the window, then swung his arm forward to get some momentum, then back as hard as he could.

Pain shot up his forearm at the contact, making him grunt.

The window rattled in its pane, but there was no sound of cracking. Across the room, the door handle started to jiggle again, the door banging in its frame.

“Sugawara?! Koushi?! What are you doing? Do not hurt yourself!”

Behind him one of the crows cawed.

“He is what?!”

Suga spun around, staring wide eyed at the birds. The smaller one had lowered its head, tilting it slightly. It cried out.

The door banged again.

“Sugawara, do not do that, you cannot break it! You will hurt yourself!”

Suga whipped back to the door, gaping at it. He couldn’t have understood what the crow had meant when it cawed. Humans couldn't understand crows. It was a coincidence, just like the fact the man had the same colour eyes as Dai.

But for good measure, Suga turned and yanked the curtains shut, before stumbling away from the window.

What the hell was going on?

Suga sunk back down next to the bed, leaning against it. He didn’t understand why this was happening to him. He wanted it to stop, for the man to go away.

Sawamura had other plans.

The door creaked again, signalling the man was probably leaning against it again. “I should not have been so forward, I apologize,” Sawamura started. Suga clasped his hands over his ears, trying to block out his words. It didn’t really work. “I will wait for you. Until you are ready to come out, to talk. I am realizing this was not the way to reveal myself. I did not plan it like this, but it was like…” He trailed of and Suga heard him sigh. “I will explain things to you later. When you are ready.”

There was shifting, and a soft thud, and Suga had the impression the other man was now sitting in front of the door.

Suga scowled. If it was going to be a waiting game, he would win. He had spent weeks and weeks in a hospital room, unable to leave it, waiting to get better. He didn’t get stir crazy anymore. Hunger and thirst would get to him long before his patience would, and hopefully the man would give up by then, and Suga could run.

After a few slow passing minutes, Suga’s breathing evened out. Taking it as a sign to try and calm down more, he folded the pillowcase he had wrapped around his arm, then laid on his knees. After a moment, and with second thought, Suga reached back and yanked the bare pillow off the bed. He placed it on his knees instead, then rested his head on it.

He closed his eyes, willing his body to relax. His chest still felt hollow and cold and he really wanted to just not feel anything. He hurt, he was confused, terrified, and he was starting to come down from the rush of adrenaline he had gotten from running from the man.

Suga still didn't know what he was going to do, with either Sawamura or his feelings for Bokuto. It was frustrating, the former more than the latter.

The sudden appearance of the man was confusing and the only thing Suga could think of didn't make any sense.

Dogs couldn't turn into people, even if the dog was intelligent and seemed to always understand Suga. But that meant good training, nothing more.

And even if it was possible, which it wasn't, because Suga lived in the real world not one of his novels, why would a dog stay with a random person? Was his life that bad that he wanted to be a dog? Was he in hiding?

Suga couldn't imagine living only as a dog. It seemed so sad.

But it also frightened Suga. He had no idea what Sawamura was capable of.

The fear spiked anxiety in his chest and his heartbeat, which had slowly been calming, began to race again. It didn't give him the same rush of panic, the fight or flight response. He had been on a roller coaster of emotions and it was taking its toll. He wanted to sink into the pillow and stop.

He just wanted to stop.

Stopping suddenly seemed like a good idea. His eyes were already closed, all he had to do was just slump over and let sleep take him.

His eyelids felt too heavy to open, and his limbs like lead. The world around him dulled as he slid down to lay on the floor beside the bed.

Distantly he heard banging and someone shouting his name, telling him not to do something. Suga couldn't, didn't want to, process the words.

He wanted to go into the darkness that was taking over his mind, for everything to stop.

So he did.

+++

The table in front of him was long and the small pair of candlesticks in the middle did nothing to illuminate it. He couldn't see the room he was in, could barely see the other people around the table with him. He recognized most of them, despite the lack of light. Their eyes shone eerily in the dark, flickering in the candlelight, while beyond their silhouettes was blackness.

The two men he didn’t know were the most visible. Directly across the table from him, at the other head, was a tall slim man with short blonde hair, with ram like horns curling down around his ears. Light reflected off a pair of glasses perched on his nose, hiding his eyes, and he was dressed in a dark suit with a high collared cloak. He was smiling in a way that made Suga’s stomach curl.

The other man, seated to the right of the horned man didn’t look like he belonged at the elegant table he was seated at. Dirt appeared to be smudged on one of his cheeks, his clothing was weathered and outdated.  He looked slightly uncomfortable, but his lips kept twitching up, like he was trying to hide excitement at the same time.

“You know what you have to do,” the blonde man said and Suga blinked up at him. Around him, the others murmured their agreements.

“It’s for the best, Koushi,” Suga’s mother said from down the table, across from the scruffy looking man.

“You have to do it,” Oikawa agreed from beside Suga, across from him Bokuto nodded.

“I want you to do it, it would make things easier.”

Suga pulled his eyes from the blonde man to look down at the plate sitting in front of him. His heart sat there, shiny and slick and red, beating slowly. Suga blinked at it, then tilted his head to look at his chest.

He was in a crisp black suit, one of his favourites he wore for fancy meetings. On the left breast of the suit jacket, a hole was cut out, going through his shirt and into him. Blood was leaking out of the wound slowly, staining his clothes and giving them a wet sheen. He could see parts of his rib cage, flashes of white among the black and red.

It didn’t hurt.

He looked back at his heart, beating on the plate in front of him.

There were no utensils.

“Do it for me,” Bokuto repeated, and Suga found himself nodding. He’d do anything for the other man.

Suga picked up organ, his fingers quickly becoming covered in blood, and he brought the heart up to his lips. He was reminded very suddenly of the novel he was working on; he had a scene of someone eating their own heart. He had become emotional when writing it, if he recalled correctly.

“Please, Koushi.”

Suga opened his mouth and sunk his teeth into the heart. Pain erupted in his chest, twisting inside him and making him want to cry out.

“The pain will go away when you finish,” Oikawa whispered beside him, urging him on.

Suga squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out how it felt like his heart was still connected to him, and tore a chunk of meat from the organ. It was hard to chew; it was rubbery and tasted of copper and something unpleasant he couldn't describe. The meat was nothing like beef. Once he ground it up to the point he could swallow it, he did, then took another large bite.

He could feel tears streaming down his cheeks, mixing with the sticky gore that was painted on his chin.

His heart throbbed as he dug with teeth into it, and blood squirted out of one of the broken veins, splashing across his neck and down his suit.

He ripped more meat from the organ, and quickly swallowed it down before blood could coat his mouth.

His empty chest cavity screamed at him, begging him to stop, but Suga ignored it. He took bite after bite of the heart, his hands and body starting to violently shake as the pain inside of him increased.

When he paused, unable to take it, his spectators spoke up.

“You are doing so good, Koushi.”

“Just a little more. You are almost half way.”

“You can do it.”

Behind him, another spoke up, strong and steady. It startled him, and Suga dropped his half eaten heart back onto his plate.

“You do not have to do this, Koushi.”

Suga shook his head at the words. He didn't want to listen to them. He needed to do it.

“You have to do it,” Bokuto agreed. “You have to do it for me. I want you to, please.”

Suga reached out for the organ on the plate, his fingers shaking badly. Hands came from around behind him,  picking up the heart before Suga could grasp it.

“You do not have to do this,” the strong voice repeated, steady and kind. “Come with me instead, my Human.”

Suga looked towards the others at the table, most of whom were scowling. Only his mother wasn't;  she had a sad sort of smile on her face.

“You are strong,” she said softly. The blonde man beside her swirled towards her, his eyes narrowed. His mother very suddenly disappeared from the table, like she had never been there in the first place.

It didn't startle Suga.

The silver haired man blinked at where his mother's empty chair was before turning slowly to look up at the man who stood behind him.

As he turned, the scene around him changed.

The darkness lifted, revealing the mostly empty main room of the cabin. A small fire was crackling under the mantle, giving the room a soft, warm glow. Suga was standing, and the stranger that had been frequenting his dreams, was standing in front of him.

But something was different; something about the man seemed familiar, outside of the dream. Suga knew him somehow.

The stranger was once again nude, but his crown was gone. In his hands, he gently cradled Suga’s mauled heart. It was still beating weakly, looking like it was struggling to do so.

“We can still fix it,” the man said softly, looking down at the organ.

“I don't want it,” Suga replied, looking away from the man who literally held his heart. He saw the stranger take a small step towards him from the corner of his eye.

“Why not?”

“It hurts too much.”

“Is it not supposed to?” Suga clenched his jaw and didn't respond. The other man continued on. “That is what being Human is, is it not? Emotions, hurting, loving. Happiness and sadness. It is why you have this heart. So it will be used.”

Suga shook his head and wrapped his still quaking arms around himself, covering the hole in his chest. “It's done nothing but hurt me.”

“That does not mean it does not have good in it.” The man held up the organ, so Suga could see it better. He closed his eyes so he couldn't. “You hurt it, too, pretty badly. And it still beats for you, still tries to do its job. It wants to bring you happiness, you just have to allow it the chance.”

Suga shook his head. “I don't deserve it. I'm a horrible person, and it made me be one. It chose wrong.”

“It chose the person who made you happy, who made it happy. That is not a wrong choice. Your heart is not in control of others, it did nothing wrong. It tried its best. You have to let it try again.”

“It will just hurt me again.” Suga whispered, starting to turn away from the man. “If it's gone, it won't hurt.”

There were soft footsteps behind him, and Suga could almost feel the man's chest against his back, he was so close. “If it is gone, you will not feel anything,” the man whispered. “Do you want to devoid yourself of everything?”

Suga thought for a moment, considering. It seemed appealing. He had wanted everything to stop, he hadn't wanted to feel anything anymore because it was too overwhelming. Any positive emotions his heart has to give him felt like a far off concept. There was too much pain.

“When will it stop hurting?” Suga asked, his voice small, nervous.

A hand settled on his hip and the man behind him bowed his head so brush his nose along Suga’s neck. He was reminded of his previous dream, where the stranger had lavished his shoulders with gentle kisses.

“I cannot answer that. It suffered many injuries, and the healing it has been doing had been doing has been reversed. It will have to repair those and the new injuries. It will take time.” The hand squeezed his hip, then let go and moved to rest over Suga’s stomach, and the man pressed himself flush against Suga and held him in place. “It may never fully heal, but that is how hearts work, is it not? The ache remains, but it will be overshadowed by things that make the ache dull, make you forget about it because you cannot stop smiling. That is how it has been described to me.”

Cautiously, Suga leaned back against the stranger and dropped one hand to once it over the hand on his stomach.

“You don't know?” He asked, the hole in his chest giving a pained twang.

“My heart has never been broken like yours,” the stranger hummed against Suga’s neck. “But your heart, even though it is severely damaged, wants to recover. Look how it beats for you.”

Suga cracked open his eyes. The stranger was holding up Suga’s heart in front of him. It was bleeding, still, though the beating had slowed to almost nothing. Suga swallowed at how mangled it looked.

He had done that to the organ. He had done that to his own heart.

“How do I fix it?”

“You have got to return it to where it belongs,” the stranger whispered, lifting up his head slightly so he was speaking into Suga’s ear. “Do you think you can do that, my Human?”

Suga hesitated. He was scared, scared of the pain and how long it would be inside of him. But the physical pain he was in from the half eaten heart was not any better.

“Help me?” he asked after a few moments, still unsure with his decision.

The man behind him brushed his lips over the shell of Suga’s ear as he answered, “Of course, my Human. I did not plan to let you do it alone. It is a hard task.”

The man moved the hand holding Suga’s heart so it was in front of the hole in his chest. Suga shakily reached out the hand that had been hiding the wound and cupped it around the damaged organ. It was warm to the touch and gave a faint twitch, like it was responding to him

“I'm scared,” Suga admitted. The man have him a soft squeeze.

“It is okay. We will go when you are ready.”

Suga swallowed thickly, feeling the blood from earlier was coating his throat, then he nodded. “Just do it.”

The stranger gave no warning. He turned his palm and shoved Suga’s heart through the wound in his chest. His body eagerly accepted the organ back, including all of the pain it held.

Suga screamed as it overtook him; the physical and the emotional was too much for him. Even in his dreams, the pain was too much. His legs gave out on him but he didn't fall forward. The stranger held him up, one hand on Suga’s stomach and the other over his heart, as Suga cried out.

The man let Suga slump forward once his heart fully returned to his body and the shock of it wasn't so much, but still held him up.

“It hurts,” Suga sobbed. He remembered it all; Bokuto and Akaashi becoming engaged, that Bokuto would never love him. The nerves the surrounded the hole in his chest screamed at him and he felt like he was on fire.

The arms around him tightened and the other man pressed his face into Suga’s neck.

“I have got you,” the stranger whispered against him. “I have got you.”

Suga turned the hand that was against his chest and grabbed on tightly to the stranger’s hand. The man let him squeeze as tightly as he needed to, as he adjusted to the pain, lowering them both to the ground as he did.

The stranger gathered Suga into his lap, holding him, trying to give him some comfort. Suga curled into it, turning so he could bury his face into the man's shoulder. The man responded with holding him closer as his body kept shaking with pain.

“Shh,” the stranger murmured into Suga’s hair, running a hand up and down his back as he did. He continued the motions until the pain began to subside and Suga’s crying quieted. The shaking, however, did not stop.

“You're okay now,” the man told him after a few silent minutes. Suga tilted his head up,  blinking wearily at him. His body felt weak and tired and he wanted to close his eyes and sleep, even though he knew he was already asleep. He was in a dream.

The man holding him shifted and brought a hand up to cup Suga’s cheek. It was warm and Suga found himself leaning into it.

“You are strong,” the stranger said fondly, running his thumb along Suga’s skin. The silver haired man made a soft questioning noise, confused by the statement. “Your mind fought against that demon’s hold and illusion. When it was cracked, you pulled free.  You accepted back what was taken from you, even though it was painful. You are strong.” The man's lips turned up in a soft smile and Suga couldn't help but focus on them. They were chapped.

“Even when things were difficult, you did not give in. You are surprising in so many ways,” the man whispered as he leaned in slowly. Suga closed his eyes, tilting his head slightly so he could meet the other man's lips. He could feel the stranger’s hot breath as he spoke again, “It makes you even more beautiful.”

Their lips never connected. Suga cracked open his eyes slowly, feeling like he was struggling to do so, and found that the man was gone. The room was dark, and not the main room he had just been in, and he was laying on his side on the floor. His body ached, particularly his chest, and he had a feeling it wasn't from how he was laying. He looked around without moving his head, trying to comprehend where he was and what was going on without causing himself more pain.

When he saw the pillow in front of his stomach, he remembered. He remembered that he had been working on his manuscript, then he had gotten distracted looking at his phone, learned about Bokuto, then there had been the strange man who had kissed him.

Then Suga had fallen asleep.

Or maybe he had passed out.

He didn't know, but he felt groggy, weak, and sore all over.

He pushed himself up into sitting and shifted so he could look around the bed to the door. No light shone out from under it, and there was no other indication the strange man who had broken into his cabin was still there. Once he was sure his body wasn't going reject moving, he slowly he crawled towards it, then pressed his ear against the wood.

He heard nothing. No footsteps, or breathing. Nothing to tell him if the man had left. There was a chance the man was still there, waiting for him.

Hesitantly, Suga reached up and unlocked the door. He waited a moment, listening, but again there was nothing. He swallowed the lump that was gathering in his throat, then turned the handle and pushed the door open a few centimeters.

Just outside the door, to the side of it, the man, Sawamura, was laying on the ground. He was deep asleep, facing the room Suga had locked himself in, a little frown on his face.

Instinct told him to close the door and lock it again, but he ignored it. Instead Suga pushed open the door even more, wanting a better look of the man who had terrified him.

He was handsome, with a strong jaw to match his strong body. He was well built, his defined muscles clear with the man's lack of clothing, but he seemed to be covered in pale scars. A shiny, newer series of scars caught Suga’s eye.

They were along the man's thigh, one large one surrounded by a series of smaller ones.  The larger one was puckered, and curved awkwardly down the man's thigh, starting at the front of his hip and angling to the back of his leg.

They reminded Suga of the cuts Dai had received the first night he had arrived in.

He looked back up to the man's face.

It was familiar, as well, despite the fact Suga knew he didn't know the man. He had never met him before.

His heart gave a painful twang, making his entire body shudder and his stomach curl. The ache reminded him suddenly of the dream he hadn't even remembered he had had. There had been a man, who had held Suga’s broken heart, a man who had been appearing in his dreams for days, and that man was in front of Suga, asleep on the cabin floor.

He had made strange comments, and Suga had written them off because it had been a dream, but the comments combined with the unique color of Sawamura’s eyes and his scars had Suga wondering.

He didn't want to wonder. It was too far fetched.

Suga leaned back into the bedroom and closed the door before crawling back towards the bed.

As he hauled himself up into the bed, he debated taking his chance to run. He could probably get past Sawamura before the man started to wake up, but he wasn't exactly sure where he could go. It was late, or at least the sun had set, and Suga wasn't sure where Yuuji’s house was in town even in the daylight. If he went, Suga would have to navigate going down the mountain without light or his bike.

His stomach knotted at the idea of leaving the cabin. Everything inside of him told him it was a bad idea, that he shouldn't go. It was dangerous. He vaguely recalled that Sawamura had told him not to go down the mountain, in his dreams. Suga didn't know why, but the advice seemed right.

Suga decided to stay in the cabin. After all, Sawamura had made no move to actually harm him. He could have broken down the door if he wanted to do that, and he clearly hadn't.

Maybe, in the morning, Suga would give him the chance to talk, to explain himself and tell Suga how he knew him, why he had kissed him

Explain where Dai was.

As Suga began to drift again, his aching body demanding rest, he realized he had not locked the door to the bedroom again.

He found that he was okay with that, for some reason. Despite all that had happened, he didn't feel like he was in danger.

He curled into the blankets of the bed and allowed sleep to take him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The alternate title for this chapter is 'Suga and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.'


	9. Lemon Balm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “My name is Sawamura Daichi and I am one of the Guardians of the Forest we are in. I have the ability to shift between this human form and the one you know as Dai.” 
> 
> “What?” Suga whispered, not believing a word. 
> 
> “I am not a Human or a wolf, or dog as you like to call me. I am, for the lack of a better term, a spirit from another realm, one that is joined with yours.”

It was raining. 

That was the first thing Suga processed as he pulled himself out of sleep. Rain was slamming against the window, rattling it in its frame. He could hear the wind howling outside and he wondered how long the storm had been going on.

How long it would last. 

He forced himself to roll over onto his back and stared up at the ceiling as memories started to trickle in. He closed his eyes, forced back the too emotional ones, and focused on the most relevant one: the man who had come into the cabin and trapped Suga in the guest bedroom. 

He rolled his head to the side and looked at the door. It was still closed, but light was trickling out from under it. The man must have gotten up at some point. 

Suga looked back up at the ceiling. He needed to figure out what he was going to do. First he needed to be able to get up; his body ached and he wanted nothing more to stay in bed until he could recover from the ache of what he assumed was sleeping on the floor. Then he needed to deal with the man on the other side of the door. It was something he really did not want to face because he had no idea what to do. 

He wanted to know what the man had to say, he wanted to know so many things that it kind of made his head spin, but he was in no way prepared to deal with actually finding out. The man could be fooling him, trying to lure him out so he could kill Suga or something. He could be deranged and delusional. 

Why had Suga made the decision to stay? He should have run the night before, when he had the chance, before the storm had hit. There was no way he could leave the cabin now. He was stuck with his choices. 

He reached up and scrubbed at his face, ideas rolling through his head. He needed coffee before he heard anything the man had to say. He was not dealing with any of this before coffee. 

And he needed to get the man into pants before that, because as good as the man had looked, that was still too awkward. 

And he needed a weapon. He’d feel better if he could protect himself, in some way, incase the man just randomly snapped. There was no way Suga could overpower him, but if he had something to hit the man with, he’d feel a lot better. 

He needed to get to the kitchen, was his conclusion. 

Somehow.

He pushed his palms into his eyes for a moment, working up the courage to move and go through with his poorly conceived plan. 

He wasn’t ready.

He got up anyways.

His feet felt heavy as he pushed himself up into standing and he shuffled to the door. When he was there, he leaned his forehead against it, then took a deep steadying breath.

“Are you there?” Suga called out, his heart starting to pound in his chest. He didn’t want a response.

He got one.

Light footsteps came from the other side of the door, then a deep, but gentle voice. 

“I am.” 

Suga closed his eyes tightly, telling himself to calm down. He could do this. He had a plan. 

“If I open the door, are you going to hurt me?”

“Never,” was the instant reply. It wasn’t soothing; it just made Suga’s heart move up to his throat. He felt like he couldn’t breath. 

“You wanted to explain things to me,” he stated, trying to sound more confident than he felt. He was proud that his voice wasn’t wavering. It was steady and strong.

“Please,” the man said, his voice getting closer, like he was moving towards the door. Suga wanted to rush back away from it but his feet seemed braver than his heart and refused to move. “I have so much to tell you, I am sorry, I-”

“Shut up!” Suga snapped, his panic rising. He had a plan, he needed to stick to his plan or he couldn’t do this. The man on the other side of the door stopped talking and a small amount of guilt pooled in Suga’s belly. He told himself to ignore it. He could be rude to this man; the man had broken into the cabin after all. 

But he didn’t need the man angry at him. Suga swallowed around the lump in his throat.

“Shut up,” he said again, this time in a near whisper. “I’m not...not ready to hear it yet.”

A long moment passed and Suga barely heard the man over the loud pounding in his ears.

“I will wait.” 

Suga squeezed his eyes tighter together, then slowly began to move his hand towards the door handle. He took another deep breath, then released it shakily. 

“I’m going to come out,” he said, feeling like he was shouting but knowing the words were barely above a breath. Everything was too loud. He wanted to run back to the bed and hide under the covers, where monsters and strange men couldn’t get him. 

“I’m going to come out,” he repeated, more trying to tell himself he was going to do it than the man, “so I want you….I want you to step away from the door. Go to the middle of the room.” He heard footsteps, but they could have been going anywhere. He couldn’t pinpoint where they were. “Say something,” he ordered, hoping that would help him figure out where the man had gone.

“I am in the middle of the room,” the man replied, his voice soft, trying to be soothing and understanding. Suga felt like the man was treating him like a frightened animal. Suga felt like one. 

He licked his lips then turned the handle before his panic got the best of him, and pushed open the door a few centimeters. He peered out the crack.

The man was standing over by the couch, his arms hanging by his side. He looked relaxed, though his head was tilted to the side, like a curious dog. It reminded him of Dai. 

He almost slammed the door back shut at that thought. It was too farfetched, too absolutely unrealistic. Dogs couldn’t turn into men. And men couldn’t randomly appear in his dreams and tell him things. 

He must have seen the man around town at some point and that was how he knew his face. 

It was the only logical explanation. 

“I’m going to come out,” Suga said for the third time. The man blinked at him, patient. “And I will talk to you. After I get coffee and you put on some pants.” 

“I do not have any pants,” the man said, his lips turning down into a frown. 

Suga wanted to pinch the bridge of his nose, because why the hell was the man naked in the first place. It didn’t make sense.

None of it made sense. 

“I’ll get you pants,” Suga said, not believing he had to say such a thing. “You have to stay right there.” 

“I will.”

The man stood completely still and Suga pushed the door open enough so he could slip out. The silver haired man felt ridiculous as he pressed his back flush against the wall, too scared to even get a step closer to the man. He moved at a snail’s place, keeping a sharp eye on the man, for any hint that he was going to suddenly rush Suga, but he didn’t. He just watched, with the same small frown, as Suga shuffled along the wall. 

Once Suga was at the main bedroom, he slipped inside and slammed the door closed, pressing his back against it. 

He looked over to the sliding glass window. 

He couldn’t even see the balcony with how hard it was raining. It reminded him of his first day in the cabin, when he had found Dai. The sky had been dark then, too.

Suga moved his hand up to cover his mouth, trying to physically hold back a sob that wanted to escape. 

What the hell had he gotten himself into?

He could escape now, open the window and run until his legs gave out. He just had to make it to the road and he could find his way down. He’d be soaking wet, but he could do it. 

Why wasn’t he doing it?

Why weren’t his legs moving? 

Why was he staying in the cabin? 

His knees began to shake and he started to slide down the door, falling into a crouch. 

He didn’t know what to do. 

He wanted to be back in his apartment, in the city, under his covers, knowing he was safe. Somewhere with no strange men and where he wasn’t completely isolated. There was no one around to help him. He was completely alone. 

Suga bit down on his hand, telling himself mentally to focus. He couldn’t get even more worked up, he was already half way in a panic attack. If he started crying he might as well not have even bothered leaving the other room in the first place. 

He had a plan.

He had to stick to his plan.

He wouldn’t feel so weak and out of control if he could just get to the kitchen, where there were actual useful items. 

But to do that, he needed to get the man some pants to wear. 

Suga pushed himself forward and crawled on his hands and knees to where his laundry basket lay. He had never put the clothes he had washed back into his suitcase or into the dresser. He dug through the basket until he found a pair of loose fitting sweat pants and a shirt he used to sleep in. They were big on him, so they might fit the other man.

He forced himself up into standing, and with shaky legs, shuffled to the door. 

It took him a minute to work up the nerve to reach for the handle. His hand didn’t want to move and he had to keep telling himself to just open the door. Just open the damn thing. 

When he finally did, he saw the man standing in the same spot Suga had left him in. He was watching the door, but his hands were not longer relaxed. They were clenched into fists and Suga could see the muscles flexing in his forearms as he squeezed his hands tighter. 

Hot fear ran through Suga’s chest and he pressed himself as flat as he could against the wall, his breath catching in his throat. The man was clearly upset over something, probably something Suga had done. Had he taken too long? 

Suga didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want the man angry, for the man to snap. He looked like he could easily tear Suga’s arm out of his socket. The man was muscular, extremely fit, and Suga knew the difference between muscles that were toned because they were toned to be used and muscles that were toned to be shown off. Oikawa had explained it to him.

The man’s muscles were clearly meant to be used. 

“I am not upset with you,” the man suddenly said, making Suga jump and bang his head against the wall. “You do not have to have to be frightened of me.” There was an edge to his voice, slightly strained, like he was trying to keep his composure. It didn’t reassure Suga. “I am upset with myself for scaring you like this. You think I am going to hurt you.”

“It's a reasonable conclusion,” Suga found himself replying, his voice a whisper. The man clenched his jaw, making Suga flinch, but then he turned his lips into a tight smile.

“I know. And I apologize. I did not think things through...and I will tell you more when you are ready. After I dress and you get your coffee. That was your wish, was it not?” 

Suga gave a shaky nod. 

The man looked Suga up and down, then slowly stretched out his fingers so his hands were no longer curled into fingers. He took his own calming breath and his smile softened ever so slightly. 

“Would you like to throw the clothes to me? That way we are still at a distance.” 

Suga wanted to snap at the man for patronizing him, but he hadn’t thought about how he’d get the clothes to the man. He nodded, then balled the garments up tightly and tossed them. They unfolded mid air and flopped down to the floor, just out of the man’s reach. The man looked down at the clothing, then up to Suga, waiting for instruction. 

Suga bit at his lip, unsure what to do. He didn’t want the man to move, but he wanted the man dressed. 

“I’m…” he started. He paused, swallowed, then tried again. “I’m going to go to the kitchen.”

He began to move along the wall again, his hands falling beside him and palms pressing hard against his thighs. The man watched him, turning in his spot to do so, until Suga could duck into the kitchen. 

He rushed forward, stumbling as he reached for the drawer that held the kitchen knives. He yanked it open, the drawer making an ugly banging sound as he did, and grabbed at the chef’s knife. Once it was in his hands, he fell to his knees and turned to curl against the cabinets, clutching the knife to his chest as he did. 

He had half expected all the knives to be missing, but they weren’t, and now he had something. Something he could use against the man if he needed to. He didn’t want to have to use it; part of him feared he wouldn’t be able to in the moment, but simply having the knife made him feel safer. 

Suga ducked his head and rested his forehead against his knees. He focused on breathing, sucking in air for five seconds through his nose, then out through his mouth. It didn’t help his pounding heart, but it helped calm his racing mind. 

He had achieved two parts of his plan. Things were not going terribly. 

He just needed to make coffee and hear the man out. After the man explained himself, maybe, hopefully, he would leave. 

And then Suga could pack up his things, call a taxi or Yuuji, then take the first train back to the city. 

That seemed like a very good end to his plan. 

He pushed himself back up into standing and moved so he could start to prepare the coffee. He forced himself to not think about anything else as he worked one handed. He counted out loud how many scoops of grounds he was using, of how much water he would need. Once the coffee was brewing, he dug under the cabinets until he found his favourite mug and talked himself through how much cream and sugar he wanted. 

He felt silly, but it stopped his hand from shaking around the knife he was clutching. 

He didn’t jump when the coffee pot beeped at him. He had turned to watch the last drops brew, then poured the drink into his mug. He took a long sip and it felt like liquid courage, warming his insides and grounding him. 

He picked up the mug and after another deep breath, walked out to the main room. 

The man was still standing by the couch, but he had put on the clothes Suga had given him. The sweatpants fit, but the shirt was too tight across the man’s chest and the arms liked they would rip if the man raised his arm. Suga felt a tad bit guilty; the shirt must have been uncomfortable, but the man had worn it anyways because it was what Suga wanted. 

Suga eyed the man warily before taking slow even steps out into the room. The man watched him as he moved across the room and sat on the far end of the couch. 

He could see, now that the table wasn’t blocking his view, that the man, at some point, had picked his phone and laptop up off the ground and had set them on the seat cushion between the table and couch. His heart clenched in his chest. He had knocked his laptop down in his rush to get away and hadn’t even thought of it since. He could have broken it. He could have lost all of his progress on his novel. He stupidly hadn’t uploaded his work onto his cloud in days.

Panic rose into his chest but he beat it down; he had slightly more important things to worry about and hopefully Kiyoko would understand the delay. 

Suga sat himself down on the couch and turned to look up at the man, clutching his mug and the knife in his hands. 

“Who are you?” he asked, voice far more confident than he was. 

“Sawamura Daichi,” the man said. Suga bit his lip. It was the same name the man had given him the night before, but it felt familiar in a different way.

“I’ve heard that name before,” he said, prompting the man. He wanted an explanation. The man closed his eyes and sighed through his nose.

“You might have heard it in town. This cabin used to belong to my family,” the man, Sawamura said. Suga wrinkled his nose, thinking back to what Abe had told him about the cabin; Sawamura had been the name she had given him. 

“Why are you here?” If he recalled correctly, Abe had said the Sawamura’s had disappeared and their son had left town. Why would he suddenly return and break into his former home?

Sawamura closed his eyes, looking like he was struggling to find an excuse. He clenched his jaw a few times, taking deep breaths after. Finally, after a few long, tense, moments, he opened his eyes. 

“It would be easier if I started at the beginning,” he said quietly, ducking his head and looking to the floor. “May I sit and tell you everything?” 

Suga narrowed his eyes, not really trusting the answer he was given. “First tell me where my dog is.” 

There was no sign of Dai anywhere. No sign of a struggle. No anything. Suga feared for the worst, but he wasn’t sure what exactly the worst was. There were too many options. 

“He is right in front of you.”

Suga stared at Sawamura, unblinking. He tightened his grip of the knife in his hand, thinking the man was clearly delusional. Not running when he had the chance was going to be a mistake. 

“I am Dai.” 

Suga pressed himself against the arm of the couch, eyes narrowing slightly. 

“We watch the show together,” Sawamura said, taking a step forward, toward him. Suga scrambled back, dropping his mug of coffee to the floor, ignoring the sound of it shattering, and pointed the knife at the man. Sawamura stopped, his lips turning down into a frown. “You lay your head on my side and we watch the show on your screen, in front of the fire. You think the man who can turn into a dragon is attractive.” 

“That just shows you’ve been spying on me,” Suga hissed, fear starting to swirl inside of him. He had to get away from this man. How long had he been watching him? Spying on him? Had he been in the house the entire time? 

And where was Dai? What had the man done to his dog? 

“After you fell ill you started having strange dreams,” Sawamura started, his voice softer. Suga’s heart felt like it stopped in his chest. How did the man know that? He hadn’t told anyone because he had only just realized it himself. “We were together, in this room. I held you.”

“How-”

“We shared the dreams,” Sawamura said, taking another step forward, then sinking down to his knees, so he was kneeling between the couch and the table. “I told you, you have a bond. Please let me explain things. You can keep your weapon pointed at me.” 

Suga took a shuddering breath, not sure what to do. The man was clearly not in his right mind, but if he just wanted to talk… Suga nodded weakly, no other choice available to him. 

Sawamura’s lips turned up into a small smile. “My name is Sawamura Daichi and I am one of the Guardians of the Forest we are in. I have the ability to shift between this human form and the one you know as Dai.” 

“What?” Suga whispered, not believing a word. 

“I am not a Human or a wolf, or dog as you like to call me. I am, for the lack of a better term, a spirit from another realm, one that is joined with yours.” 

Suga pushed himself back against the couch until he was starting to slide up onto the arm. “You’re insane,” he hissed. 

Sawamura sighed, then held out one hand, palm up. Nothing happened for a moment, then small beads of soft blue and green light began to float out of his hand. They burst with soft pops after raising a few centimeters, giving off a crisp floral scent. 

“What the hell!?” Suga cried, pushing himself up and over the arm of the couch, trying to get away. He fell back hard onto the floor, his knife clattering out of his hand and sliding. He rolled and hurried after it.

“Are you okay?” the man asked, quickly standing up and coming around the couch, towards Suga. 

Suga rolled and pointed the knife at Sawamura, his heart racing in his chest.

“Stay away from me!” he yelled. The man stopped in his tracks, his eyes wide, and slightly hurt. Suga didn’t care. He didn’t care. He didn’t know what was going on and he was scared. “What the hell was that?!” 

“It was magic,” Sawamura said softly, kneeling down once again and holding his hands up defensively. Suga scooted back, away from him. “I would shift for you, prove what I am telling you, but I do not don’t have enough energy for that. I miscalculated how much Life you needed and I have not fully recovered.” 

Life, the man had said that before, in one of the Dreams. Suga could remember it now. 

“What does that mean? Life? Did you give me some sort of drug?” Was he hallucinating all of what was happening, because that would make a lot more sense than what he was being told. 

“It is exactly what it sounds like. It is Life, it is what keeps you alive. You were sick, you were going to die. You were dying and your body could not recover on its own, so I gave up some of my Life so that you would live. We are both still recovering.”

Suga wet his lips, trying hard to not let his complete panic take over him. He couldn’t breath around the lump in his throat. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream and run because none of what the man said sounded real, but something in his chest told him the words were truth. That the man before him was Dai, that he had been given something magical, that he had a connection with Sawamura that let them share dreams. 

It was all real but he didn't want to believe it, because how could it be? Magic and spirits and shape-shifting were all things of fiction, things he wrote about in his books. None of it was real. 

“An eon ago,” Sawamura began softly, pulling Suga out of his panic. His hand was up again, more small lights coming out of it. “before Humans walked this land, a being who had been born when the stars formed in the sky decided that he wanted to rest.” The lights in Sawamura’s hands came together and formed the outline of a turtle, who began to walk around the man's palm. “There was too much conflict in the realm he lived in, so he came to this one. It was still young and forming. He wandered until he found a good spot then settled down to sleep.” 

Suga watched as the light turtle laid down and disappeared into his shell. More lights sprung up from Sawamura’s hand, forming mounds around the turtle shell.

“The Earth settled, growing around the sleeping being, and as payment for not disturbing him and letting him rest in this new realm, he let some of his magic seep out and give Life to this new world.” Little sprouts grew out of the turtle and the mounds around it, slowly getting bigger until they formed into trees, and Suga recognized it as the mountain the cabin was on, the forest they were in. “The mix of old magic and new earth was appealing to beings from other realms who were also tired of conflicts. They migrated here to live in peace, enjoying the Forest the being had given them. But soon, conflict began to arise between the creatures of the Forest. They were from different realms, had different politics. Before things could come to a disastrous head, two Tree spirits voiced the idea of deciding Guardians. They would settle disputes and act as protectors for the weaker beings in the Forest. After much discussion between all of the creatures, a demon and a spirit were appointed. Much to their surprise, the Forest seemed to agree with this idea and granted them more power. Things grew peaceful again; the Guardians were a good balance to each other.”

The lights in the man's began to morph and Suga watched with hesitant wonder as they changed into a dog, a wolf he realized, and a stag. The animals circled each other in Sawamura’s palm.

“The Guardianships were passed down to the heirs of each family. The demons and spirits did not die, but they would reach a point where they wanted to return to their own realms, to give up their mantles. As time passed, Humans came into the world and began to occupy the lands around the Forest.” Another light joined the wolf and stag, taking shape of a man, caught between the circling. “The demons did not like the Humans. Humans were scared creatures and attacked things they did not understand.” The man lashed out at the stag. “But the spirits knew they were new creatures to the earth. They would grow and learn and needed to be protected.” The wolf got between the stag and man, keeping the stag from attacking back. “It caused a divide in the Forest.”

Suga looked up from Sawamura’s hand to his face, his lips turning into a scowl. “What does this have to do with me? With you being here?”

Sawamura frowned and the lights disappeared from his hands. “I am one of the Guardians of the Forest,” he repeated. “It is my job to keep the Humans that come into the Forest safe, and that includes you. My intentions were to stay away from you, in the Forest, but you found me when I was injured, you took care of me. You were kind. Gentle. A brightness in you I have never experienced and I enjoyed staying with you. I stayed even after I healed because I wanted to protect you. I grew fond of you, enough that I gave up my Life to protect you.” Sawamura tilted his head down, looking to the floor. “I enjoyed being with you.”

Suga swallowed around the lump in his throat, trying to process what was being said to him. He shook his head. “No, no. That's not true. Dai is a dog. You’re not a dog!”

“No, I have told you, I am a spirit,” Sawamura said softly, eyes darting back up to Suga for a moment before looking away. 

Suga scowled, then waved the knife in his hand at the man in front of him, wanting a better explanation. “Then why haven’t you shown yourself before? Why pretend to be a dog?!”

Sawamura sighed. “I was not pretending. I was...stuck. It is easier to protect the Forest in that form. I have not used this form in years, not since my parents went back to our realm. I suppose the easiest way to explain it is that I forgot how to use this form. Mentally, the other form is a bit easier. My emotions are more simplified and I am more intune my my natural instincts. And there are the physical benefits of that form as well; the speed, the teeth, the strength. Magic is harder to use, but I do not use that much magic to begin with. I have no talent for it.” He sighed again, his nose flaring as he did. Suga crawled back, further away. “I had no intentions of showing myself to you. But you became sick and I could not help you in that form. I tried to tell you through our Bond but you had a strong mental block. You did not want to know the truth.”

Suga tried to understand the words the man was telling him, but how could he be expected the believe any of it? It sounded like it was out of some mythology book. 

“And now?” he asked, his voice almost in a hiss. 

“I could not bear to see you talk about yourself like that. Saying that you were not good enough.” The man looked away from him, took a deep breath. “I apologize for my actions. I thought you would recognize me, that our Bond was strong enough. I realize they were not appropriate. I wanted you to know what I felt and my emotions got the best of me.”

Suga stared at the man. He blinked once. Twice. Then he shouted, “What?!” 

Sawamura’s head jerked back up and his eyes, his amber eyes so much like Dai’s, exactly like Dai’s, were full of sorrow. “I am sorry.” 

Suga shook his head again, over and over, and scrambled away until his back hit the wall. No, it was all too much. This strange man was claiming that not only was he some magical forest spirit who could shapeshift into a dog, but that he had somehow developed feelings for Suga while pretending to be his dog. No. It was too much. 

It was too much. 

Suga dropped the knife so he could reach up and grab at his hair. He needed to hold onto something. Nothing felt real, he didn’t feel real. The lump in his throat was growing, sealing up his airway and he couldn’t breathe. 

He gasped for air but it wouldn’t go into his lungs. He was choking. His hands dropped from his hair to his neck, scratching at his throat, trying to claw out the lump that had formed. 

It was too much. 

Everything was too much. 

A low deep melody cut through his panic and Suga’s head jerked up. Sawamura was kneeling right in front of him, his hand reached out and almost touching Suga’s ankle. He was singing, soft and steady, in a language Suga didn’t understand. But he knew the melody of the song; he had heard it before. It was haunting and slow, but something about it was soothing, wrapping around the panic in his chest and quelling it. 

Sawamura’s eyes met his, bright and amber and so much like Dai’s that they had to be the same. The man continued to sing, repeating the words over and over with no break in them, like the song was eternal, and Suga found himself trying to distinguish phrases instead of trying to breathe. His fingers relaxed slowly and he went from digging his nails into his throat to lowering his hands into his lap.

But he couldn’t take his eyes off the man in front of him, singing quietly and watching him with a soft gaze. There were too many emotions in the man’s eyes, all directed towards him, and Suga closed his own to try and hide from them. 

His heart was still pounding in his chest, and even though he was still filled with panic and fear, the adrenaline was leaving him. He felt heavy and weak and he just wanted to cry until he couldn’t feel anymore, then deal with the fact that the man was still in front of him. That the man was still singing, and that something about his song was calming Suga down. 

His eyes snapped open and he looked to the man. “Is this magic?” he asked, his voice shaking. Was the man putting some sort of spell on him, forcing him to calm down? Luring him into a trap, like a siren?

Sawamura shook his head and stopped his singing, though his voice was still soft and somewhat carried the melody of the song. “No, it is just a lullaby. You enjoyed it before, I thought… I did not want to touch you and make things worse.” 

Suga’s eyes darted to where the man nearly was touching him and he pulled his legs in closer to himself. Sawamura’s hand went limp. 

“Would you like me to leave?” Sawamura asked after a long moment. Suga curled in on himself more, his heart starting to slam in his chest. Yes, yes he wanted the man to leave, to let Suga just be, but the words he wanted to shout got caught in his throat. They refused to come out.

He looked up to the man who was watching him so patiently. He flinched away, feeling like he was under a microscope, and turned his head so he didn’t have to look at Sawamura. His eyes went to the window, where rain was slamming against it. It was too sturdy to be shaking in its pane, but he could tell that it hadn’t let up at all since he woke up. 

His fingers twitched in his lap and he curled them into his shirt to keep them from showing his nervousness. 

He wanted Sawamura gone, but a small part of him, in the back of his mind and in the pit of his stomach, told him he couldn’t send the man out into the rain. He just couldn’t. 

He looked back to Sawamura, who was still watching him. He ducked his head, letting his bangs fall into his eyes so they blocked his view.

“When it stops raining,” he whispered, not believing what he was saying. What the hell was wrong with him. “After the storm passes, I want you gone.”

There was no response for a minute, then he heard the floor creak as the man stood up. “Okay. I will leave when the storm passes.” He sounded solemn, and sad, but he seemed to be accepting Suga’s words. 

Suga didn’t look up as he heard the man slowly walk away. He curled in more on himself, bringing his knees up so he could press his forehead into them. He was tired now, worn out physically and emotionally. He wanted to lay down. Perhaps after texting Oikawa the address of the cabin and saying if his best friend hadn’t heard from him in twelve hours to send the police. But that would cause unnecessary drama. He didn’t want to do that; he didn’t want Oikawa to worry.

He could find a way to deal with what was happening. 

After a minute or so, Suga heard footsteps coming back towards him. He tensed, tried to shrink into a smaller ball against the wall. He didn’t want to talk to the man again; he just wanted to be left alone.

He jumped when something warm and heavy was draped over him. He jerked his head up to find Sawamura stepping back from him, and the comforter from his bed around his shoulders.

Suga eyed the man, not sure what he was playing at, but Sawamura did not stay to watch him. After making sure Suga knew what had happened, the man turned and disappeared into the kitchen. Suga pulled the blanket around him tighter, then leaned forward and craned his neck, trying to see what Sawamura was doing. A few moments later, Sawamura returned to the main room, a broom, dust pan, and kitchen towels in his hands. He did not even glance to Suga as he walked to the couch and kneeled between it. Suga heard the soft clinking of ceramic and realized that the man was cleaning up the coffee Suga had spilled. 

Suga leaned back against the wall, pulling the blanket even tighter around him, wanting to feel completely in cased in it. He even pulled some up to go over his head like a hood, just to feel less exposed. He watched as Sawamura cleaned up the mess he had made, then stood and went back into the kitchen, once again not looking at Suga.

Was he giving him space? Had he realized how freaked out and upset Suga was over everything that had happened and he was trying to just let Suga adjust? Because Suga sorely needed that. The man had said he hadn’t wanted to frighten Suga, or make things worse when Suga had been in the middle of his panic attack. 

Pain suddenly shot up Suga’s spine, dull and thudding, and he remembered how hard he had fallen back off of the couch, trying to get away from Sawamura. He clenched his jaw, trying to decide if it was worth moving to the couch. He’d be more comfortable, but it actually required moving and he wasn’t too keen on that for many reasons; most of them being the pain and the fact he felt relatively safe in his small ball. 

The pain gave another pulse and Suga started to crawl towards the couch. He moved slowly, trying to not make any noise or sudden movement that would alert Sawamura to what he was doing. The couch betrayed him by squeaking and Suga quickly curled into the arm rest once he was seated, wrapping himself up in the blanket. 

Sawamura stayed in the kitchen.

Hesitantly, Suga moved again, poking his hand out from under the blanket and leaning forward until he could grab his phone. He snatched it up and brought it to his chest, clutching onto it tightly. He ran his thumb over the screen and let out a sigh of relief when it lit up. The battery level was low, and the screen looked even more cracked than before, but it was on and had a signal.

He brought up his messages to Oikawa, staring at them. He wanted to send him something. Anything. Let him know what was going on, that he was okay. But Oikawa expected him to be okay, didn’t he? Sending him something else would just let him think the contrary. He exited out of the messages and stared down at his phone, looking at his recent messages.

The ones from Bokuto stared back up at him, unread.

His heart clenched in his chest, pain he had temporarily pushed down swirling up and letting itself be known once again. 

He wanted to text someone. Let them know he was alive. Give them proof and a time, in case something went wrong. 

He tapped on the screen and closed his eyes shut. He waited a moment, took a few deep breaths, then squinted open his eyes enough to see the keyboard. He tapped out ‘Congratulations on your engagement : ) I am happy for you’ and hit send. 

Then he tossed his phone to the side, thankful when it landed on the cushion beside him and not on the floor where it could crack more. 

Suga hunched himself back over, wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his head on his knees. His back gave a small pang and he groaned. It still hurt, but it felt better than being on the floor. It was the single good thing of the mess he had found himself in. 

He leaned to the side and flopped over onto the arm of the couch, still very much in a ball. Maybe he could just stay like that for the rest of the day and into the night. Part of him knew he had to work on his novel, he had a schedule to stick to, but how was he supposed to be able to focus on it? There was so much in his head. 

He was still trying to understand what was going on around him, but he honestly didn't want to. It was too much to try to process. He wanted a distraction from everything, to lose himself in something to the point he didn't have to think. But his usual go to for that was writing, which honestly explained how he tended to write so much in such a short amount of time.

But that also required focus and he couldn't do that. He felt like he was going into some sort of emotional shock. 

He thought about watching something but had no idea what to even choose and he didn't really want to move to have to get his laptop. He squirmed against the arm of the couch, hating that he felt so lost. 

Everything was too much. 

“You need to eat.”

Suga started and scrambled to sit up. He stared up at Sawamura, heart pounding hard in his chest. The man was standing there, holding a mug and a plate in his hand. He looked sheepish and nervous, which did not suit him. 

Suga tightened the blanket around him, childishly thinking it would protect him from the man in front of him. 

Sawamura’s lips turned into a frown and he slowly moved, like he was trying to not frighten a scared animal, and set the mug and plate on the table in front of Suga. The plate held two pieces of toast with jam on them and a cut up tangerine while the mug had what looked like cocoa in it. 

“I do not know how to cook, but my mother used to make this for me and I thought you might like it.”

Suga blinked at the food, not realizing how hungry he really was until he saw it. How long had it been since he had eaten? He never had dinner, so it must have been midday the day before. He squirmed in his seat while his stomach growled loudly. 

Footsteps caught his attention and he glanced up to see Sawamura retreating back to the kitchen. Guilt coursed through Suga and he cleared his throat slightly. The other man stilled, his posture stiffening slightly. Suga wondered if he was expecting something harsh. 

“Thank you,” Suga whispered. 

Sawamura visibly relaxed and continued into the kitchen. 

Suga turned back to the food in front of him and pushed himself into properly sitting. He eyed the plate a moment longer before reaching out for a slice of fruit and not so elegantly shoving it into his mouth. The citrus flavor was intense and tangy and Suga hadn’t thought the tangerines he had gotten were so ripe. He scarfed down two more slices before moving onto the toast, ripping off a large piece and pushing it into his mouth. 

It was simple food but it was good, and he was so hungry. But it was also something light, which he appreciated. He wasn’t sure if he could handle something heavy. It would have made him feel weighed down, which he did not need with how he felt. 

He wondered if Sawamura knew that or if the man really didn’t know how to cook. 

Instead of thinking more, Suga shoved toast into his mouth, filling his cheeks to the point he felt like a chipmunk. 

Once he managed to swallow, he needed something to drink. The toast hadn't been dry, which was a strange contrast to how he had always perceived the food.

He picked up the mug and peered down at its contents. It was definitely cocoa, smelling rich and chocolatey and warming his insides without even having to take a sip. He hadn't even known he had the ingredients to make cocoa. 

He took a hesitant sip, then nearly melted into the couch. It was so good. It tasted exactly like it smelled, with a soft hint of cinnamon in the aftertaste. It was perfect; hot enough to warm his insides but not scald him. 

He took another long gulp, his lips turning up into a smile. He thought of all the lore he had heard surrounding chocolate, how it helped chase bad feelings away. He wondered if there was truth to it. It felt like it.

How could he feel so horrible with chocolatey goodness warming his belly? 

He had the sudden urge to dip his toast into the drink. In any other circumstance, the idea would have disgusted him, but something in the back of his mind told him it would be delicious. 

He set his mug down and ripped a corner of toast and did as his urges told him. It was strange, but the sweetness of the jam worked with the cocoa. He did it again and again until he had no more toast left. 

He picked up the mug again and settled back into the couch, adjusting the comforter so he was wrapped up tightly again, with his drink against his chest. 

Suga ducked his head down, surprised at how much better he felt with just a little bit of food inside of him. Things seemed less intense, like he could possibly handle everything that was happening to him. 

Bokuto and Akaashi being engaged.

Dai turning out to be some sort of magical spirit who had feelings for him.

Magical spirit things being real. 

That still didn't seem possible. 

He took another sip of his cocoa, letting it warm him and give him some courage. 

“Is it real?” he called out, knowing Sawamura could hear him. Dai’s hearing had been so good, so the man's must have been, too.

There were footsteps behind him, and Suga wondered if Sawamura was walking so loudly on purpose. He had the feeling he was. 

Suga turned his head to look at the man, who was wiping his hand with a kitchen towel. 

“It is,” Sawamura said simply. “I was hoping you would catch on before I showed you. You have encountered so much, but you seem to… process it differently.” He stopped wiping his hands to throw the towel over his shoulder. Suga found himself swallowing at how the man's biceps strained against the shirt. He could easily rip Suga in half, with or without magic. It took a moment for Suga to fully understand his words and he found himself blinking up at the man in confusion.

What exactly had he encountered in the forest? Everything seemed so normal to him. There were deer and birds and bugs. The kid he had met in his first few days had been rather strange, and so had the man in hot spring river, but Suga didn’t think they were some sort of magical spirits or anything.

Then again, he never thought his dog would turn into a man and kiss him.

Suga turned away from Sawamura and tightened the blanket around himself. Perhaps he wasn’t quite ready to delve into all of it. One step at a time. 

He took another long sip of cocoa. 

Sawamura seemed to realize Suga wasn’t ready, or maybe interpreted his silence as a dismissal. He turned and retreated back into the kitchen.

Suga tucked his head down to look back at his mug of cocoa. 

He didn't want to really concentrate on trying to process things, but he didn't have the focus to sit down and work. 

He ran his thumb over the edge of the mug, debating on what to do. He needed a distraction so his mind could work to accept things in the background. Watching something came to mind; something he could lose himself in without having to focus. 

He moved so he could set his mug onto the table and grab his laptop from where it had been placed on the floor. A moment of panic ran through him as he settled back into the couch and placed the device on his lap. There was a huge chance that there was crack in his screen, or he had dislodged something internal, or he had damaged his laptop beyond repair and that all of his work was lost. He clenched his jaw and looked down at the laptop sitting in his lap; it looked like it always had, sleek and silver with stylized horror stickers all over it. It seemed fine. He gave it a light shake and nothing rattled around inside. 

Suga took a deep breath, closed his eyes, then opened up the device. He waited a moment, then cracked open one eye. His screen was perfectly intact, but slightly dirty. 

His laptop, by some miracle, was fine. Everything was fine. 

He let out a large sigh of relief and he felt a fair bit of tension that had built up in his shoulders release. 

His world seemed to be falling apart around him, but he still had his laptop. He could do this. He would be okay. 

Suga brought the device out of sleep mode, glad it had somehow managed to stay connected to its charger. His word document blinked to life on the screen and Suga blanched and quickly saved, then minimized it. After a half of seconds thought, he brought the page back up and uploaded it to his cloud, then minimized the page again.

The silver haired man nodded to himself, feeling like he was making progress on something at least, and brought up his streaming site. He eyed his options; the show he had been watching with Dai about the ragtag team trying to stop the apocalypse was his most recently watched show and was waiting for him with a plot hook involving Halloween he really wanted to watch. But it had become his and Dai’s show and watching it now just seemed strange. 

There were plenty of things in his watch list he could go for; he had queued a good amount of nature documentaries and even more occult ones, there were tonnes of B-list horror movies he could watch, and he had at least three countdowns about the world’s cutest animals ready to go. Not to mention all of the other shows he had been meaning to watch. 

But as he scrolled through his options, his eyes kept flicking up to the title card for the one show he wanted to watch the most. He shifted in his seat, telling himself he was allowed to watch it alone. 

Sawamura was going to leave in the morning and if Suga planned to finish the show, he would have to do it alone. 

He clicked on the title card, bringing him to the next episode, made the show full screen, then set the laptop on the table. 

“Sawamura,” he called out, mentally chiding himself about his weakness as he did. 

Suga turned to look at the kitchen just as the man came to the doorway. Sawamura raised a brow at him, questioning him, and Suga looked away, not wanting to make eye contact.

“Do you….want to watch the next episode with me?” he asked in a near whisper. “I thought you might want to know what happens next, too.”

There were a tense few seconds of nothingness before Suga heard light footsteps and then the couch dipped beside him. He glanced up and bit his lip. Sawamura was sitting on the other side of the couch, looking at him like was examining him. The man gave him a gentle smile and Suga quickly turned his face towards the laptop. 

He reached out and hit the spacebar to start the show, snatched up his cocoa again, and curled himself into the corner of the couch. 

It was surprisingly easy to lose himself in the show; it jumped straight into plot heavy elements that involved his favourite characters and quick enough, he was clutching his mug in his hands in anticipation. 

He clung to the normalness of the situation. He was sitting on the couch, watching his favourite show with the being that used to be slash was Dai. It was normal. 

Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Sawamura lean forward and rest his elbows on his knees, his lips parted just slightly as he watched the show. He was just as caught up in it as Suga was. Just like Dai had been. 

It was normal. 

Until the man spoke.

“Why are they dressed up in costumes?”

Suga nearly jumped out of his seat when he was addressed, completely not expecting it. He looked up at Sawamura with wide panicked eyes, thinking maybe the man was using this as an excuse to try to talk, to be polite, but the man’s brow was scrunched up and he looked genuinely confused. 

And he didn’t seem to realize he had asked the question out loud, as he jumped just as well when Suga answered him.

“Because it is Halloween.”

Sawamura whipped his head around to look at Suga, eyes darting around the silver haired man’s face, like he was in his own panic. He took a deep breath through his nose, seemingly trying to calm himself. 

“What is Halloween?”

Suga blinked at the question, not really sure how to explain the concept. He’d never had to before; everyone knew what Halloween was. 

“It is...kind of a holiday where people dress up in costumes, have horror themed parties, and drink a lot of alcohol.” 

Sawamura frowned at the poor explanation. “What does the holiday celebrate?”

“I’m not sure,” Suga admitted with a shrug. “I think it is an American holiday or something and we just kind of adapted it here as an excuse to drink.” 

Sawamura looked back to the screen for a moment before his eyes focused back on Suga. “Do you celebrate it?”

Suga bit his lip in thought, not sure if he really wanted to get into a small talk conversation. He kind of wanted to zone out, not think, forget that his dog had turned into a person. Talking to said person was not ignoring the problem. 

But talking about Halloween didn't seem like it could hurt.

“I do. It is my favorite holiday. There is a lot of casual spookiness and that is kind of my thing. It is nice, plus all the good movies and food come out then.” Suga smiled at the thought of Halloween and warm ciders. 

“Do you dress in costume?”

Suga glanced to Sawamura and felt his face start to heat up. The man was looking at him with soft eyes, still hunched over, and rubbing at his bicep absently, drawing Suga’s eyes right to the muscle.

Suga quickly looked away.

“Yeah. I was a...ah, faun. I was a faun,” Suga mumbled, slightly embarrassed. He debated offering to slow Sawamura a picture when the man have a bark of laughter. Suga’s head jerked back up and he stared. 

His face started to feel hotter and hotter, confusion and shame washing over him. He didn't know what was so funny. Was the idea of him being a faun so ridiculous? Oikawa hadn't thought it was a good idea until he saw the final outcome.

“I do not think we have the same concept of what a faun is, but I think you would make a cute one,” Sawamura said after a moment, pulling Suga out of his panic.

“What?”

He didn't want to think about Sawamura thinking he was cute, as a faun or not. It was too much, in any sense. 

He pointedly turned his attention back to the laptop and the ironic subject of one of the characters being introduced to the supernatural world. 

Perhaps a smoothie would help his own transition.

Though cocoa was doing a good job. 

He took another long sip of his drink and closed his eyes for a moment, focusing on how it warmed his body. That was all he needed to think of. Just enjoying and relaxing and not actually thinking about anything.

When he opened his eyes again, he was glad to see Sawamura had gone back to watching the laptop instead of him. He seemed to take hints about not wanting to talk well.

It put less pressure on Suga.

His own eyes flitted back to the laptop and the show playing out in front of him. The episode was coming to an end and he could feel in his bones what was going to happen. As a viewer it irked him but as a writer it left an almost giddy feeling in him, even if novels and screenwriting were completely different.

The episode ended in a cliffhanger, the main character receiving a call that the psychic had been possessed. 

Suga hurriedly reached out and sped up the process to get to the next episode. It promised to show his favorite characters and give deeper plot and that would be excellent for his whole plan to not actively think about things.

He finished his cocoa by the end of the first act of the next episode, and then seemed to lose all sense of time. One episode turned into another, and another, one cliffhanger after the next, and before he knew it, the room around them had darkened, only illuminated by the laptop screen. 

Somewhere along the way, gradually, without Suga realizing it, he had slumped down until he was laying on his side, stretched out and taking up most of the couch. His feet were just shy of brushing against Sawamura’s thighs and he could feel the heat the man seemed to be giving off. 

Dai had always been warm and on more than one occasion Suga had fallen asleep on him while watching their show. The thought made him smile, though there was an ache in his chest.

He was going to miss falling asleep on Dai. It had made him feel safe, and small, and warm and now it would be gone. He felt empty. He didn't like it.

He didn't like anything about the situation. It was all so much and maybe, just maybe, he'd have been better off not knowing.

He wondered if Sawamura could erase his memory.

The thought turned his smile into a scowl. He hated the idea of his knowledge being taken from him, even if it would have been consensual. He wouldn't have known that fact.

No, despite all of the uneasiness and anxiety the entire thing was causing him, part of him, a small part, was glad to know the truth. Even if he had learned in the worst way possible.

Sawamura had the worst timing.

“Sugawara.”

Suga started, blinking open his eyes, not even knowing when they closed, and looked up to Sawamura. The man had stood up at some point, maybe recently, and his hand was hovering over Suga’s leg, but not touching him.

“You are falling asleep,” the man said softly and Suga slowly blinked up at him. No, he had definitely not been falling asleep, he had just been thinking. With his eyes closed. And his limbs had become heavy.

He had not been falling asleep.

Almost hesitantly Sawamura lowered his hand to touch Suga’s leg. His instincts told him he should be jerking away, but he didn't. In fact, he simply closed his eyes again and sunk into the couch more. 

There was a soft huff above him, of amusement, maybe, but Suga couldn't exactly tell. 

He felt the blankets move around him, being shifted to cover him fully. The light from the laptop disappeared and Suga heard it click shut. He made a soft noise of protest; he was still watching the show. He wanted to know what happened next, even though he wasn't exactly sure what had just happened. 

Sawamura squeezed his leg softly and began to whisper. “I was going to move you to the bedroom, but you look comfortable here.” Suga made a grateful noise. He didn't want to be moved and he really didn't want to be touched too much. The leg touching was just enough.

But then it was gone.

“Goodnight, my Human.” 

There was the sound of Sawamura shifting, then a gentle warm pressure against his hair. Suga’s breath caught in his lungs at the kiss, not having expected it. 

But then a heavy soothing warmth spread down his body as Sawamura pulled away from him and Suga found himself not fighting the want to sleep. He accepted it and allowed himself to drift into the hazy warmth. 

He almost missed Sawamura’s words as he disappeared back into the kitchen.

“The storm should pass before morning. I will try to be gone before you wake back up.”


	10. Summer Peach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was something in the shadows beyond the silence and he didn't want to find out what it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo what's up I'm not dead

He woke to a dull ache in his chest. 

He felt hollow and cold, like the warmth he remembered falling asleep to had slowly seeped out of him during the night. Part of him wanted to close his eyes again, to wrap himself tightly in the blanket he was under, and go back to sleep. He wanted to try and take the warmth the blanket was giving his body and push it into his chest, to let him feel something other than the overwhelming emptiness that was inside of him. 

But Suga knew that was not possible. His heart and his mind had taken in too much information, information that hurt his core and confused him, and he could not just bounce back. He couldn’t force something to spark to life inside of him when he had nothing to give. 

He needed to feel nothing. 

It was better that way. 

At least, that was what he told himself. 

Maybe it was just easier that way. Easier if he didn’t have to think about his emotions and how it felt like his heart had been carved out of his chest. He didn’t want to think about how the person he was in love with had never loved him, or how he had been thrust into a strange world he didn’t want to be in, or how someone he had grown fond of, had trusted, had been a disguise. 

He wanted to be empty. He wanted to not feel. He deserved that, didn’t he? After everything he had gone through, even if he had put himself in those situations, he deserved to wallow a bit. 

He deserved to lay on the couch and not force himself to do anything. 

Suga pulled the blanket closer to himself, deciding that he would let his emotions do what they wanted. He wasn’t going to try and force himself to feel things. He had no one he would have to pretend to. 

Suga knew he was alone in the cabin once again. 

There was no noise around him. No clicking of claws or heavy, too-loud footsteps. No rain slamming against the windows. He couldn't even hear the birds chirping outside.

There was nothing.

It made him feel colder, more hollow. If possible. 

Suga closed his eyes again and allowed himself to sink back into the couch. 

He had no idea how long he laid there, unmoving and wallowing before he'd began to drift. It wasn't a full sleep, but his eyes were heavy and he wasn't aware of anything besides the flashes of strange images and memories his mind gave him. They were random things, nothing that tugged at his core; plants and flowers drowning in black ink, balls of soft light floating over water, and reading his favorite childhood stories late at night by the light given off by hospital machines.

When he was pulled back into consciousness, it was by his stomach growling loudly at him. He tried to ignore it, wanting to stay curled up and not-sleep, to pretend the world didn't exist for a bit longer, but his body refused. It began to ache and knot, making it impossible to brush off.

It took what felt like hours to motivate himself to get up and get something to eat. He kept telling himself ‘five more minutes,’ believing he would actually get up. He was only able to do it when his stomach gave a loud, disgusting growl. 

Suga rolled off the couch, pushing up into standing with a low groan. His joints ached, and Suga told himself it was because he slept awkwardly on the couch, not because he felt so cold. He didn't believe himself.

The walk to the kitchen felt like a kilometer instead of just the few steps it really was.

His mind and body felt heavy as he entered the kitchen and he didn't realize he was moving on autopilot until the smell of coffee hit him. He closed his eyes tightly for a moment, gathering his focus and awareness before opening them again. He turned in place, looking back to to the refrigerator; he needed food, not just coffee. 

A plastic container full of cut-up chicken sat on the counter beside the refrigerator, staring back at him. 

He blinked at the container, trying to figure out why it was there. Why had he taken it out? He didn't want chicken, his stomach couldn't handle it. He was thinking soft eggs and rice, why the hell had he-

The realization hit him in the chest, his heart feeling like it was crumbling inside him.

He had been on autopilot. When he made breakfast for himself, he had always made food for Dai. He had pulled it out when making coffee, going with his routine.

But he didn't have that routine anymore. Dai was gone. Suga had sent him away. He knew that. It had been his decision. He hadn't wanted to deal with all of the craziness that Dai had brought into his life. 

So why did his chest hurt looking at a container of chicken?

Maybe he missed the companionship. Having someone just being there to cook for someone else, even if it was just a dog. A dog-slash-person-slash-spirit-slash-thing. He didn't know.

He just knew he hurt. 

After a moment of just standing, Suga took a deep breath, then moved forward to grab the container of chicken and put it into the refrigerator. While he had the doors open, he took out the carton of eggs and leftover rice. He couldn't remember how long ago he had cooked the grains. Everything felt like it was so stretched out, but all happening at once as well. It left him disoriented. 

But they couldn't have been that old, so he set them on the counter with the eggs while he fished for a clean pan. 

Cooking was easier than he thought it would be. He could focus on it but he didn't have to think. Stirring his eggs with a spatula was a happy distraction. 

Eating, not so much. 

Even though he had known his stomach couldn't handle much, he hadn't expected bland eggs and rice to be rejected. There weren’t even any spices or peppers in the small dish. But after a few bites, his stomach began to turn. He didn't understand, he’d been so hungry just awhile ago. Why couldn't he eat? 

Suga pushed his bowl away from him and dropped his head into his hands with a groan.

He thought he had been okay with wallowing, letting himself work through his emotions naturally and not trying to force anything, but it was becoming exhausting. The spacing out, the empty feeling, the not being able to eat; it was all so much. Part of him wanted to crawl back into bed and not think. To sleep until all of this nothing seeped out of him. 

There was a sudden pang of wanting to be in his bed, back in his apartment, in the city.   
Suga lifted his head from his hands and looked out into the room in front of him. Why was he still there? Why hadn't he packed his things, bought a train ticket, and left the place that had done this to him? Why hadn't he run yet and forget about magic and dogs and soul sucking plants?

Did he even believe what Sawamura had told him? It seemed like something out of one of his stories. He had started to come to terms with it the night before but that seemed like eons ago. It was a completely different mindset than the one he was in at the moment. 

He didn't want to believe anymore.

He wanted to go home.

But he couldn't move. He couldn't get up and go to the bedroom, throw all his things in a suitcase. It felt like something was keeping him in the chair; nothing physical, just a weight in the pit of his stomach. Something telling he couldn't leave. It wasn't a threatening feeling, or ominous, simply an instinct. 

He wanted to leave, but he couldn't.

Suga dropped his head back into his hands. 

He wondered if the feeling in his stomach had to do with the information Sawamura had given him; that he was connected to the Forest through something called Life. It sounded even more far-fetched than the idea of magic and Sawamura being a shifter, but it felt true and explained how he recovered from being so sick and the random nosebleed. 

But magic and demons and spirits? 

How could he just accept such a thing?

Maybe he had actually died when he was sick and this was his afterlife. He pinched his arm and frowned at the sharp pain he felt.

Would he feel pain if he was dead? Or was it someone didn't feel pain in a dream?

He couldn't remember. 

Suga took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He looked at the bowl of food in front of him, his stomach souring at the sight, and accepted his defeat. He stood, picked it up, and returned to the kitchen, shoving the meal into the refrigerator. 

He'd try again later, when his stupid stomach was ready to take the food it was given without protest. 

He leaned against the counter, looking out the window above the sink.

He had two weeks left in the cabin. He could leave sooner, ignore the weight in his stomach keeping him there, but Sawamura had told him he was still recovering. If he tried to leave, would he get another nosebleed? How long would it take him to recover fully? Even if he did stay his two paid-for weeks, he would still need to go to the town to shop. He couldn't become a hermit and he couldn't bother Yuuji, asking him to deliver groceries. 

Maybe it was all a lie to keep him in the cabin, so Sawamura could be with him.

He didn't know.

He was tired of not knowing. He was lost and confused and empty and cold and it was all so frustrating. 

And those were just the feelings Sawamura had left him with. His feelings about Bokuto and everything that had happened back in the city just added more unpleasant and upsetting feelings to his chest.

Why couldn't he just sleep his problems away?

Suga reached up to rub at his eyes. He would love to go lay back down, but part of him that sounded suspiciously like Kiyoko told him he couldn't just lay in bed all day, even if he felt awful. He had already wasted so much time wallowing and being in shock and hiding and he felt like he hadn't worked on his manuscript in days. 

He needed to do something.

Or at least feel like had done something.

It didn't even have to be writing; just something to make him feel productive.

Suga turned, leaning back against the counter as he looked over the kitchen. The dishes he had left on the sink from his failed breakfast caught his eye and he moved towards them. Cleaning would be productive and hopefully help clear his mind.

It was easy enough to focus on without having to think about it or anything else. Dishes quickly lead to wiping the counters, sweeping up the floor, and cleaning out the refrigerator. He placed the wilting vegetables into the counter, planning to throw them away, but when it came to the act, he hesitated. He had been saving the end of his fruits and vegetables, taking anything he didn't use and placing it out in the yard for the crows and any other forest creatures that wanted them. 

But were those animals actually animals? Or were they spirits, demons, shapeshifters, whatever, like Dai was? Would leaving food out lead more strange things to his doorstep? 

The crows couldn't have been just plain crows. They seemed far too intelligent and they had hung around with Dai. They had to be magical in some way. 

But they had never bothered him and had always seemed so excited about the food. 

A little surge of guilt went through him at the idea of throwing the vegetables out. It seemed like such a waste and he knew the little treat would make the crows happy, if they were still around the cabin. If they hadn't followed Sawamura back into the Forest.

Suga eyed the wilting vegetables before walking across the kitchen to grab a bowl to scoop them into.

With a little huff and a mumble of ‘why the hell am I doing this?’, he took the bowl and headed towards the balcony. As he stepped onto the wood, fresh air pushed into his nose and down to his lungs, filling him with a dizzying lightness. He hadn't realized how smothered he had felt by the stale air of the cabin until he was outside. It was like there was an instant uplift in his spirit simply from stepping outside.

He tipped his head back, closed his eyes, and inhaled deeply. It felt like his senses were amplified; he could smell the still damp earth, hear the distant buzzing of bugs, and feel the barest breath of the breeze against his cheek. It all felt good, felt right, like the first sip of strong coffee during a lazy morning.

Suga slowly opened his eyes and found his lips curling up into the hint of a smile.

Maybe all those articles he had read about opening windows and going outside to help depression actually had some merit to them. 

With a renewed sense of energy, Suga made his way down the balcony, down the ramp and to the lawn. As soon as he stepped off of the wood and onto the grass he mentally cursed himself. How did he always seem to manage to forget to put on shoes when going into the backyard? It was like a curse. 

But it wasn't too bad. The grass tickled his feet and the sun hadn't dried up the dew yet, so it was slightly damp. It was oddly pleasant instead of disgusting. 

He took a breath then marched towards the middle of the yard, passing the hot spring with a wary eye. Once he was where he wanted to be, he stopped and unceremoniously turned the bowl upside down and dumped the contents to the ground, looking over to the treeline as he did.

“This is for you,” he started, like the crows were hiding in the shadows out of sight. “I don't know if you're normal birds or if you are like Sawamura, but I'm not going to throw out food that can still be used. So you two or whatever else lives in the Forest can have it. So. Enjoy.”

He turned to begin to walk away before he finished talking, wanting to feel like he was dismissing the Forest. But before he could get more than a few steps away, something in the shadows responded to him. All sound around him, the chirp of birds and rustling of leaves, faded into nothing and the only noise was the faint dinging of a wind chime. At the same moment, there was heavy breeze, lifting fallen leaves and petals into the air making them dance in front of Suga before swirling back around him to the trees. 

He followed the movement, turning in place as he watched the leaves and petals give one last lilt up before floating back to the grass, just at the edge of the trees. Suga stared at the fallen foliage before taking a step away from the forest. Part of him told him it was just a coincidence; the chimes had been his ears ringing and it has just timed with the breeze, that the gut feeling telling him that something had responded to him was just his imagination. That the knot forming in his stomach, urging him to go towards the trees was nothing. 

He knew there were things behind the flowers and trees, but he didn't know of anything that could control the breeze and take away sound. 

Then again he didn't know anything about magic or demons. 

People in the stories he loved always died from doubting the powers that be and he was not going to change anything. Especially when he didn't understand anything.

“I don't know what you want,” Suga said, his voice much stronger and more confident than he felt, “but I'm not going to - oh…” His sentence trailed off as the leaves began to tumble across the lawn with the help of a breeze he barely felt. He watched as they blew along the tree line and came to rest almost on the other side of the house, in front of a patch of flowers that looked like they had wilted. 

Suga eyed the area of dying vegetation, and felt torn. The logical side of him told him to continue to go back to the house, while something in his chest tugged him back towards the trees. It didn't quite feel like his instincts, because he was pretty sure those were agreeing with his logical side and telling him to run, but something was there, in him, telling him to go to the wilting flowers. It was a strong, firm feeling, and Suga could not shake it.

He swallowed thickly and turned to look at the blooming flowers closest to him. “This is a trap, isn't it? I'm going to go over there, and something is going to jump out and eat me. So why am I walking towards it? Why am I doing this?”

His feet were moving him towards the brown patch among the green and there was nothing he could do to stop them, even after he told them to lead home the other way. Within only a dozen or so long steps, he was in front of the wilted flowers. 

As he looked down at them, the thing in his chest thrummed and he found himself sinking to his knees, a frown on his face. The base for the main stem of the wilted section of flowers was bent and cracked, like something had stepped on it, but hadn't fully broken it. 

It looked so sad.

After a moment of staring at the dying plant, Suga reached out for it. It was dying and with the way it was broken there was no saving the top half on the plant. He wanted to put it of its misery and finish snapping the stalk, let the plant start to regrow.

As he pushed the leaves out of the way so he could reach the stem, the thing in his chest pulsed.

He didn't need to snap the stalk. He could fix it. He could heal the plant. 

It didn't need to die. It just needed something. 

Something to patch up the break, something warm and comforting. 

Something that would breathe life back into it. 

The thing inside him pulsed again, making his whole being shake. Warmth spread out of it and through him at the thought of giving life to the little plant. 

Life.

He knew the word meant something more than what he originally believed; there was something bigger behind it. 

The wilting flower needed Life.

Like the Life that was inside of him, that Sawamura had given him. 

He wanted to help the little flower. 

As he had the thought, the warmth inside of him traveled to down his arm, gathering in his hand. He watched with wide eyes as his palm began to glow. It was subtle at first then slowly got brighter and brighter and his hand grew warmer and warmer. Nothing hot or burning, but like he had placed his hand on a heating pad that was warming. He didn't know what to do beyond stare. There was nothing he could do but watch as his palm became almost too bright to look at.

Part of him, that logical part he apparently no longer listened to, told him he should be terrified. His hand was glowing. He should be freaking out, but he wasn't. It was like the warmth in him was keeping him calm. 

But even so calm, he couldn't help but gasp in wonder as the light in his palm began ripple and tiny bubbles of light began to float up out of him. As more little balls formed in his hand, his palm dulled until it was no longer glowing, and by the time that happened, he was holding dozens of little bubbles of light, the size of pin heads.

He wanted to bring his hand up to examine what had come from inside of him but he knew he couldn't. He needed to give it to the plant, just like Sawamura had given it to him. With so much care, he gently tipped his hand to pour the bubbles into the soil the plant was in. Even though he knew the bubbles were made of light, he for some reason expected them to fall like marbles to the ground. So when one of the bubbles floated up instead of going to the ground, Suga let out a shocked little laugh. 

When the bubbles eventually hit the ground, or the leaves on their way down, they burst. With each pop, the bubbles gave off a strong scent of lemon and coffee. It was a strange mixture, but it was not off-putting. Suga found it strangely pleasant. 

Once all the bubbles had burst and the air was rich with lemon-coffee goodness, the reality of what exactly had happened set in. Strange, weird magic lights had come out of him. Magically. 

The warmth that had been keeping him grounded had left him with the glowing and the panic began to creep in. 

He had done magic. Maybe. He had done something. Something had come out of him that shouldn't have. Humans did not have the ability to pull spheres of light that smelled delicious out of them. 

What the hell had happened to him? What had Sawamura done to him? What was inside of him and why had it guided him so forcefully to the wilting plant?

He didn't understand and it scared him. 

He had been okay when the magic and strangeness was out in the forest, he could ignore it, but now it was in him and how the hell could he ignore that? He couldn't. It was impossible. 

His eyes dropped to his hand which looked so plain now that it wasn't glowing. He brought it up slowly, intent on examining it, but movement behind it caught his eyes. 

The flowers, which had been brown and drooping were perking back up, stretching out, and their color was returning. The bend in the stalk was straightening and the crack was mending together, and Suga felt like he was watching the plant break in rewind. After a few tense seconds, it was standing pretty, like nothing had happened to it all.

Like Suga had breathed life back into it.

Or more accurately, poured Life into it.

“What the fuck?” he whispered, pushing himself up into standing and taking a few quick steps away. The thing in his chest didn't protest, didn't try to pull him back towards the forest.

“What the fuck?” he repeated frantically, eyes darting up the the trees. “What was that? What is in me? What is...what is going on? I didn't..I didn't sign up for this! For any of - I don't want this!” 

He didn't want something magical or possibly demonic inside him. He didn't want it to be able to pull him towards the forest and will him into giving it up. The forest could have all of it. 

But wasn't what was inside of him keeping him alive? It has kept him from succumbing to his cold and was still healing him. He couldn't just give it away, could he? What would happen to him? 

He didn't know. 

Why hadn't Sawamura explained things to him?

Suga groaned and closed his eyes. Sawamura hadn't explained anything because he had never got the chance to. Suga had sent him away. It had made sense to do at the time, he didn't regret it. Waking up to him being there would have not been good for Suga mentally. He needed the time to just check out, even if it had only been a few hours.

But weird magical lights coming out of him changed things. He needed actual answers, or answers he could handle.

He needed Sawamura back. 

But he had no idea how to find him. The only thing he could think to do was shout out his name but that felt ridiculous.

Why couldn't the thing in his chest lead him to Sawamura like it had lead him to the dying plants? Just make his feet move and carry him to Sawamura.

“I want to go to Sawamura. I want to go to Dai.”

It felt more ridiculous than calling out Sawamura’s name, but it was something.

As soon as he began to think he had made a fool of himself and that it hasn't worked in any way, he felt the thing in his chest return. It wasn't as strong as before, just a small little warmth settled over his heart, but it tugged in him, tugged him towards the forest. He was hesitant and he knew going past the tree line was a bad idea, but he weighed his options. 

He could stay in the cabin and hope whatever was inside him did not pull him back to the trees, he could yell at the sky and hope Sawamura heard him, or he could take things into his own hands and hope the thing in his chest lead him to Sawamura and not to some shadow monster that wanted to eat him. 

If he were looking in on himself as a spectator, he'd tell himself to go sit on his couch and lock the doors to keep himself in, but he wasn't a spectator. There was no one watching him, no one to tell him what to do. He had to make his own poor decisions and chastise himself for them.

If his heart got eaten by some shadow demon or shape-shifting beaver, it was his own damn fault. He just hoped if that happened, Kiyoko didn't summon his dumb ass with a spirit board to force him to complete his manuscript. 

Suga took a deep breath, mentally called himself an idiot, then let his feet begin to guide him. He forced himself to not swear as he crossed the treeline and the underbrush crunched under his bare feet. He could have at least gotten to go get his shoes before trekking into the forest, yet again. 

As he walked and disappeared into the shadows of the trees, he took a deep breath. The same lightness that filled him when he had first stepped out of the cabin returned, the same amplification of his senses. The damp earth, the chirps of the birds, the crispness of the air; it made him feel he was part of the forest. He wondered if it had to do with the thing inside him, if it was making him feel like that. If the Life inside him was universal, or if it was connected strictly to the plants around him.

When he found Sawamura he was going to ask, demand an explanation.

He just needed to find him first.

The thing in his chest was weaving him through the trees, deeper and deeper into the darkness of the forest. Even though he could not see more than a few meters in front of him, he did not feel lost. He didn't know where he was going, but he felt he knew the way, and bizarrely enough, he didn't feel like he was in danger.

Until there was a screech of birds and the frantic fluttering of wings.

Suga’s head jerked up and he tried to see through the canopy, see if the birds had been the crows that were friends with Dai. But it had sounded like much more than just two crows. The screeches had been so loud and the fluttering had gone in more than two directions. 

As Suga turned his head to and fro trying to spy a bird, the thing in his chest pulsed before seemingly dropping to his stomach. 

The forest around him had gone silent. 

There were no birds chirping, no bugs humming, no rustling of leaves in the wind. It was not a gradual fade out like he had experienced before; it was like everything had simply stopped.

It was unnerving and Suga began to regret his choice to just wade into the forest. He had no idea what lurked inside and he had just assumed, hoped, the thing inside him would help him avoid danger. It had done a good job thus far.

The thing inside him turned and for once his instincts didn't fight it. They were both telling him to move, not stand still and be an easy target, so he listened to them and started walking once more.

“Take me to Sawamura,” he whispered to his feet, like they needed the reminder.

They carried him through the brush, weaving him between too-tall trees and climbing bushes. The eerie silence followed, dancing around him the shadows, keeping him on edge. He didn't feel safe; not that he had felt perfectly safe when he had stepped through the trees, but now he felt like he was in danger. 

There was something in the shadows beyond the silence and he didn't want to find out what it was. 

He urged his feet to carry him faster, following the tug of the thing that has been in his chest.

But they stopped as the silence broke behind him, twigs snapping and leaves crunching followed by a heavy thud. 

Suga told himself to not turn around. He didn't want to know what was behind him. He wanted to pick up his feet and run, find Sawamura, and get the hell out of the forest.

So why he turned to look over his shoulder, he had no idea. It wasn't instinct out the thing in his chest, it was just plain stupid curiosity.

At first, he didn't see anything. He expected it to be tall, monstrous, a thing made of nightmares. Something swirling in darkness that would make him scream. 

He didn't see any of that.

As his eyes dropped down to the forest floor, he saw it, and it was the last thing he ever would have imagined the monster being: a giant frog. At least what in terms of what a frog should be. Suga knew, from television and online videos, frogs tended to be able to sit on one's palm, but the one in front of him definitely couldn't have done that. 

Its body was about the size of a microwave and Suga was sure if it extended its hind legs, they would be longer than his arms. It was a mossy green color, covered in lumps and warts, and had a dull sheen over it. It seemed to have bits of twigs sticking to it and it almost appeared like some of them were growing out of the frog. Maybe they were. The thing had pure black eyes that made it seem like it was not from the Human world, a demon frog.

The creature stared up at Suga with its blank stare a moment before it gave a deep, low croak. The noise echoed through out the silence and the hairs on Suga’s arms and neck stood up.

He didn't like the creature. It was wrong and creepy, even if it was just an oversized frog. He was much bigger than it, but he wasn't sure he could outrun it. But he probably had better mobility between the trees, he could twist and turn in them easier than something that had to hop to move.

He took a step back, away from the frog staring up at him. Maybe he could get a head start if the thing didn't expect him to run.

As he started to take another step away, the frog croaked again, just as loud and just as low, but as it finished the noise, it dropped its jaw back down. Suga watched on in disgust as drool began to drip down from its gaping mouth. The disgust quickly transformed into horror as the drool began to smoke as it hit the ground. 

Drool should not be smoking, demonic or not.

Another croak broke the silence around them; but it was different than what the frog had made before. It was higher, not as loud and hair raising. 

It had definitely come from the frog in front of him, except the thing hadn't moved its gaping maw. 

There was another high croak, then another, then two that were almost on top of each other and Suga quickly realized there was more than one frog, even if he could only see one. 

But then he saw the second frog.

As it crawled out of the large frog’s mouth and fell to the ground. 

It looked exactly like the frog it had come from inside of, just a miniature version. Which, in actuality, was the size of a normal frog. 

Before Suga could get over the shock and disgust, another horrible little frog climbed out of the demon frog and flopped onto the ground. 

Then another.

And another, until groups were trying to crawl out together and it was a constant stream of little croaking frogs pouring out of the big frog’s mouth. 

It wasn't until one of the small frogs leapt at Suga did he snap out of his horrified trance.

“No,” he told the frogs, the forest, and everything else around him, before turning and taking off.

That triggered the creatures to chase after him. He could hear the crunching of leaves and twigs behind him, the little thumps as dozens of demon frogs followed after him. 

It made him run harder, leaning forward in an attempt to go even faster; it caused him to be off balance and made him stumble a bit. To keep himself from falling forward, he threw up his arms to push himself off the trees he passed to keep himself upright. It made him stagger but it was better than falling, falling and having those horrible things catch him.

The noise of them grew louder and louder until it was almost deafening; croaking, thumping, and crunching of underbrush. It sounded like there was a small army of frogs behind him, far more than what he had seen pour out if the giant frog. Suga refused to look over his shoulder to see if they had multiplied. He didn't need to see. 

He was scared enough with what he had seen. 

He wasn't absolutely terrified but how could someone not be scared when they were being chased by monsters?

The thing in his chest pulsed and very suddenly changed the direction it was pulling him in. It was like a sharp jerk to the right, and Suga stumbled as he turned to follow. He pushed himself to run as hard as he could, until his thighs and lungs were burning. All he could think of as he weaved through the trees, pushing himself off of them to keep himself up, was how much he regretted he had never taken up regularly exercising. 

He didn't question why he was suddenly running in a different direction; he couldn't expect Sawamura to stand still when he probably didn't even know Suga was coming.

But Suga wished he was closer, or moving towards him. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep running. His lungs and throat were burning, telling him to stop, to take a moment to rest. But he couldn't. Those things, demon-frog-monsters, would get him and he wasn't particularly keen on seeing what the demonic smoking drool would do to human skin. 

The thing in his chest made him turn again and he saw there was light coming down through the canopy ahead of him. He was going towards the edge of the forest. Maybe the thing inside of him was leading him back to the cabin. He didn't want that, he wanted to go to Sawamura, but he would take it. The cabin was safe. 

He pushed himself harder, urging his legs to go faster. They burned but he told himself to keep going, he was almost to safety. Just a few more meters and he would be safe. He could secure himself in the cabin and-

And the cabin was nowhere in sight. Sawamura was nowhere in sight.

It was just a large clearing with what looked to be a statue in the middle. 

Panic filled Suga as he slid to a stop. There was nowhere to hide. Why had the thing in his chest led him to such a place? Did it want him to get eaten? 

He looked over his shoulder, back into the trees. He could hear the frogs getting closer. He had no choice; he took a deep breath then ran forward. A few steps into the field, he stumbled as something washed over him, making his hair stand on ends. He saw nothing that indicated anything out of the ordinary had occurred, but it felt like, just for a moment, he had stepped into a freezer. 

He threw his arms out to the side in an attempt to regain his balance and it was successful until he heard a loud wet thud behind him. The suddenness of the noise shocked him and Suga found himself crashing into the grass. 

He scrambled to try to get up and away, panic coursing through him because the frogs were only just behind him, he wouldn't be able to weave through the trees, he wouldn't be able to escape-

There was another wet thud, then another, and another.

Suga turned as he got up, taking hurried steps back as he did. 

Dozens of frogs were meters behind him, sitting just in front of the tree line. The large frog was sitting in the middle of the hoard and when it saw Suga looking at it, it croaked loudly, drool dripping from its jaws. Suga stepped back, preparing to turn and run, as a few smaller frogs leapt forward, like they had been commanded to do so. 

They stopped midair with wet thuds, then fell back to where they had been, like they had hit some barrier. But there was nothing there; the air hadn't even shimmered to suggest there was something. 

Suga swallowed the lump forming in his throat and backed further away from the creatures. 

If there had been a barrier sound the clearing, shouldn't he have hit it? Had he hit it? Had it been the burst of cold air he had felt? 

And if he could pass the barrier, if there was one, then did that mean the frogs could as well? Would it hold up if they kept trying to jump at it? 

Suga really did not want to find out. 

He looked over his shoulder, across the empty field to the other tree line, the one devoid of frogs. If he ran straight across the field and into the trees, the frogs would have to take time to go around. He could gain a lot of ground, get away from the demons. 

Suga took a breath and closed his eyes. He focused on the thing in his chest and how it wasn't pulling him any which way. 

“I want to go to Sawamura.”

His heart was pounding and his lungs were burning but there was nothing in his chest, nothing trying to guide him anywhere. 

He opened his eyes again and looked around. Was it not leading him to Dai because he was already in the area and Suga just couldn’t see him yet? Maybe he was in the treeline somewhere, but if he was, why wasn't he coming to Suga?

Suga turned in place, after giving a cautious look to the frogs, then looked out over the field. 

The only thing of note in the field was the statue, right in the center of the field. It was about the same height as him, covered in moss and vines with the stone showing through only at the top.

Suga began walking towards the thing, and as he got closer he could see it wasn't a simple statue like he had thought. It looked like a stone lantern that lit up the path to a shrine, but there were no shrine or other lanterns. It was out of place but it wasn't strange. It was like it was meant to be there even though it didn't belong. 

He quickly realized the base of the statue was too large on one side, a mound against it covered in moss and vines like the rest of the object. 

He told himself it wasn't his problem if the statue-slash-shrine piece was off balance, he was in a creepy forest that probably had dozens of creepy statues. He just wanted to pass by, get across the field and as far away from the demons as possible. 

He didn't want to be involved in any of it. 

He just wanted to find Sawamura, find out the truth about what was happening to him and about the Life inside of him. 

But mostly, at the current moment, he wanted to get away from the frogs until he could find Sawamura. The continuing wet thuds of the disgusting little things hitting the barrier behind him were making him anxious, making him want to be across the field as he tried to figure out what to do. Tried to figure out how to find Sawamura. 

As he began to pass the shrine, he could not help but look over at it. He wanted to see if he could see any carvings between the moss and vines, if he could learn anything about the forest. Maybe a name of some sort. 

He was too curious for his own good. 

Instead of any sort of carving staring back at him, there was a flash of tan among the green of the vines and moss. Suga froze mid step and turned to look at statue, his previously calming heart starting to pound in his chest once again. There wasn't just a small bit of tan, there was a lot. The mound that made the statue uneven was a person, their body mostly hidden behind the thick sheet of vines. 

Panic surged through Suga. The thing in his chest had lead him to the field after he had asked to be taken to Daichi. Then it had not lead him away when he had asked again.

Sawamura’s skin was tan, like the one under the greenery. 

Suga had a flash of wriggly vines wrapping around limbs and pulling them towards a gaping mouth. 

He lunged the statue, grabbing at the vines and yanking at them, trying to rip them off the body. They tore away easily, revealing a thin arm disappearing into a ragged oversized sleeve. 

The panic inside of Suga calmed slightly; Sawamura’s arms were not what anyone would consider thin and the man-dog-spirit had left the clothes he had been wearing on Suga’s bed. 

But there was still someone trapped under the vines. Someone possibly alive. If they were dead their skin would have lost its color with their veins starting to show through and they would have been cold to the touch. Hesitantly, Suga moved his hand from being tangled in the vines to touching the arm. 

It was warm. 

Suga needed to get them out from under the vines. He resumed ripping away the greenery with his hands, remembering as he did what Abe and Yuuji had told him and his own encounters. Some villager must have come into the forest, gotten lost, and now whatever inhabited the shrine was trying to eat them; some ghost or rock spirit or creepy plant demon. Anything was possible in the forest, Suga thought. 

Suga didn't want this person to get eaten. 

The tan arm lead to a torso, covered by what once might have been a grey yukata, but it was dirty and ripped and had been sloppily cut at the waist. It had mismatched buttons and handmade loops sewn along the opening to keep it closed. It wasn't like any sort of fashion Suga had ever seen, but it reminded him of something out of an old movie. 

He followed the garment up to where the person's head would be and pulled at the vines and moss until he could see their face.

His breath caught in his lungs. 

Suga knew him. 

He didn't know how but he had seen the young man with freckles and long, dirty hair somewhere before. He had looked so out of place, wherever Suga had seen him. He couldn't remember where though; it was like it was on the tip of his tongue, but it didn't want to come. 

It didn't matter. Even if Suga hadn't recognized him, he wouldn't leave the kid to be eaten. 

Suga looked over the freckled man‘s face, searching for more signs of life. His eyes were closed but his lips were parted. Suga moved his hand to be right in front of the young man’s mouth and sighed in relief when he felt hot air hit his skin. 

He was still alive. 

Suga needed to work faster. He wasn't sure how long the man had been unconscious or how long the barrier behind him was going to last. He was trying to tune out the wet thuds and increase in croaking but he could tell they were getting louder and more frequent. 

He didn't have much time. 

He made quick work of the rest of the vines around the man's head and chest then turned his attention to his legs. He paused in his work a moment to stare at the man's pants. They were as tattered as his as his top and the matching fabric belt tied in the front in a large bow reminded Suga of poor turn-of-the-century farmers he had seen in his history books.

As Suga resumed pulling him from the vines he could help but question who the hell the young man was and why he had been in the forest. 

And how long he had been there. 

Suga took a breath and told himself to not think of questions, that it would distract him from what he was trying to do. 

Which was to save the man. 

The last of the vines were more difficult to rip away than the previous vines, like they didn't want to let go of him. They were wrapped tightly around his ankles, pushing up under his pants to hold him in a firmer grip. 

Suga tried to not feel guilt as he twisted and snapped the vines so he could pull the young man’s legs free. The vines were probably not even actual plants, they were most likely appendages of some gross demon-fungus-thing.

Once the young man was free Suga tugged him a little bit away from the shrine and laid him out on the grass. 

He looked a lot younger when he was not covered in greenery. Suga estimated him to be in his late teens, but his freckles made him seem boyish. Perhaps if Suga wiped all the dirt away from his face, he'd look even younger. 

Suga reached out and pressed his fingers lightly into the young man's cheek. There was no response; he remained firmly unconscious. 

Suga frowned. The thing that had wrapped around his leg had poisoned him when he was down by the hot spring river, so perhaps the vines and moss had done the same thing to the freckled young man. 

Suga pat at the man's cheek, hoping it would someone rouse him. “Hey, hey. Wake up. You need to get up.”

The young man didn't stir. 

Suga put the back of his hand in the spot he had been patting. The man wasn't clammy, or too warm or cold. He felt perfectly fine and looked like he was just in a deep sleep. 

Suga sat back on his haunches and looked down at the freckled teen with a frown. “I'm not going to kiss you to try and wake you up.” 

But the comment did give him another idea. 

He looked at his hands in thought. He had brought the wilting flowers back to life and Sawamura had used the Life to stabilize him when Suga was sick. Maybe he could use it to wake up the young man in front of him, then Suga could figure out how to get him to safety. 

There was no way Suga could carry him and he wasn't going to just leave him in the middle of the field. 

He closed his hands into fists and focused on them. He thought about the Life inside of him and helping the young man in front of him. He imagined his hands glowing like they had before and how warm they had been. He remembered the tiny bubbles and the scent they had made when they popped. 

His core began to warm and Suga let out the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding when the warmth traveled up his arms, to his hands. 

He tried to keep his thoughts focused on what he was trying to do and not the fact he was willingly and knowingly doing magic. 

His palms began to warm and he could feel the little bubbles starting to gather in them. When he opened his eyes, having not realized he had closed them as he concentrated, he saw the glowing little bubbles in his hands and smiled down at them. Hopefully they could help the young man. 

Once the small amount of Life finished gathering and his palms stopped glowing, Suga parted his hands dropped the bubbles towards the young man's chest. 

The reaction was instant and not at all what Suga expected. 

Before the bubbles ever reached his chest or got the chance to burst, the man's back arched up and dozens of inky black wisps shot up from his chest and stomach. The wisps swatted at the bubbles floating down, bursting them. Pain seared through Suga’s chest, hot and burning, pulsing with each bubble popped. It felt like someone was stabbing him in the chest with a white hot knife, twisting it into his heart. 

He wanted to scream, but he wasn't sure his lungs would work. His legs decided to join his lungs and Suga found himself on his back, staring up at the sky. 

Before he could even try to process what was happening, the black tendrils coming from the freckled man were above him and Suga reacted on instinct. He threw his arms over his face and squeezed his eyes shut, in a feeble attempt to protect himself. Something brushed over his biceps and sides, but when nothing wrapped around him or slashed into him, Suga cracked open his eyes open. 

He was met with the underside of a bush. Panic surged through him. The vines must have wrapped around him, but he quickly realized nothing was touching him. It was surrounding him, like a cage. 

Or a shield. 

Suga took a steadying breath, the sharp pain starting to fade, and looked at the plant surrounding him; thick green leaves with clumps of little black circles throughout. Berries, he guessed, until he saw a clump of them cracking and starting to open. The perfect black circles bloomed into purple star shaped flowers with little yellow stalks in the middle. 

Suga could only identify maybe two flowers on sight and one of them was hanging just centimeters over his stomach. 

Nightshade.

Suga’s hand dropped to his side and he ran his fingers over his side where his tattoo of the plant was.

“What…?”

He knew the plant was not native to Japan but maybe it was demonic nightshade that only grew in the forest. 

His panic increased. Nightshade was deadly enough on its own that he did not want to be trapped under possibly demonic nightshade. 

As soon as he had the thought, the branches above him parted and began to bend backwards, giving Suga plenty of room to sit up. He hesitated, unsure what was happening. Maybe it had been a coincidence that the plant was a nightshade and that it had done what he had wanted. 

It could be a trap. 

Just because he had Life inside of him did not mean he could randomly summon non-native plants. 

But he didn't want to be stuck in the bush if it closed around him again, so he pushed himself up into sitting. 

The young man had fallen to lay back down on the ground, no longer arched up, but the inky wisps were still coming out of him, folded to be close around and swaying back and forth slowly. They looked alive. 

As soon as Suga began to scoot out from the middle of the bush, the tendrils lashed out, jumping at him with sharp points. Before Suga could react, could even think to react, the nightshade closed around Suga, purple flowers bursting into bloom in front of him, protecting him from the black wisps.

He saw, through the breaks in the leaves, the black wisps arching up and trying to get around the bush. The leaves and flowers followed, blocking their path, purple and yellow and green obscuring his view of the sky. Suga craned his neck and turned as the black tendrils curled and attempted to get behind him. The flowers blocked them easily, growing and turning like they were made of smoke. The wisps didn't seem to be able to penetrate through the nightshade, but Suga didn't question it. Magical plants that could move like liquid could probably could defend against inky wisps. 

But it seemed like the nightshade was done being defensive. 

Suga turned more and watched with baited breath as more flowers bloomed then the branches surged forward and attempted to curl around the wisps. The wisps darted from the grasp of the plant and arched away, going back towards the ground but not towards the young man it had come from. The leaves and flowers rustled before the branches grew and went after the tendrils, curling in the air as they did. Suga felt like he was watching a video of the nightshade growing in one hundred times fast forward. 

It looked like the branches were chasing their shadows in a very Peter Pan-esque manner. The tendrils shot across the field, bouncing like a rabbit and leaving black arches in its trail. The branches zipped after the tendrils, weaving through the arches and wrapping around them, reminding Suga of green and purple barbered wire. 

The branches squeezed, trying to cut off or choke the wisps, but they kept darting around the field, leaving arches and purple flowers everywhere. 

Suga was too busy watching them dance and chase he didn't see the trap until it was sprung. 

The nightshade branched out on either side of the wisps, blocking their turning paths and forcing the wisps to bunch join together, wrapping together like a rope, surrounded by the leaves and flowers. The wisp zigzagged, trying to escape the nightshade before it hit treeline, and presumably another barrier, but the branches stayed ahead of it, keeping it from escaping. Then, faster than Suga could process, another nightshade plant burst from the ground, right in the path of the wisp. As flowers on the plant began to bloom, the length of the wisp gave a feeble wiggle before starting to evaporate. In the blink of an eye, the inky black tendrils were gone, leaving half the field covered in a sea of purple flowers. 

Slowly, Suga turned back around and focused on the young man lying in front of him. He was still unconscious, but nothing was wrapped around him or coming out of his chest. 

The adrenaline of the situation wore off and Suga was very suddenly hit with how exhausted he was. His legs and feet were throbbing and there was a lingering ache in his chest from when the Life bubbles had been destroyed. Not to mention the fact he was increasingly aware of how completely drained he felt; he wanted nothing more than to lay down and take a five hour nap.

He was pulled from his thoughts of curling up in front of a fire by a disgustingly loud trilling. It was deep and sent Suga’s stomach turning. 

He hadn't realized the forest had gone quiet around him until that moment. 

Suga felt like he was in an old school B-horror movie as he very slowly turned to look at the other side of the field. 

The frogs had multiplied, and not just by a few. 

Suga could no longer see the grass on the other side of the barrier. It was completely covered in disgusting little demon frogs with the large one in the middle, its cheeks ballooning out like disgusting pieces of bubble gum. 

The large frog trilled again, its eyes focused on Suga. The noise vibrated throughout the clearing, making Suga cringe. 

The nightshade bush around Suga flexed, curling up around him like a shell, more purple blooming in his peripheral vision. The shell did not close, leaving a large opening for Suga to see through. To be seen through.

He had to get out of the clearing. He shouldn't have stopped to try to help the freckled young man. If he had kept going, his adrenaline would have not run out. He wouldn't have been sitting in a field, surrounded by nightshade and too exhausted to try and stand up. 

He didn't know what to do, had no clue what he could do. 

The only thought he had was to let the shell close and hope the invisible barrier and the one made of flowers could protect him until he had enough energy to get up and run. 

He didn't want to run. 

He wanted answers and explanations. 

He wanted to Sawamura to tell him what the hell was going. Why he could summon little bubbles of Life from inside of him and why was a toxic flower protecting him? 

Why couldn't he have just had a normal writing retreat? 

Suga closed his eyes and tilted his head back, trying to figure out what the hell to do. 

The frog began to trill again, only to be cut off in a high pitched cry. The cry was drowned out by a deep, low growl. 

Suga’s eyes flew open.

Dai was emerging from the forest behind the small army of frogs, his ears back and teeth bared. His fur was all bristled up, making him look even more massive than he already was. 

His eyes were focused onto the large frog, but when a smaller frog leapt towards him, Dai easily knocked it away with his paw. The little frog went flying, smacking into the invisible barrier and bursting into smoke and disappearing. 

Suga’s eyes widened. The frog had been so solid until it suddenly wasn't. They had been hopping into the barrier since Suga had run through it and they had been fine. Had Dai been the one to turn the disgusting little thing into smoke?

The large frog tore its gaze from Suga to turn and face the beast behind it. The frog puffed up its chest before giving a loud croak and before the noise even finished, the small army around it began to mimic it. The croaking was almost deafening and Suga’s hands jumped up to cover his ears. 

A moment later, Dai lunged towards the large frog, his hackles raised. The frog leapt to the side, barely avoiding Dai’s snapping jaws. Dai turned as his paws hit the grass and lunged again. 

He caught the demon by its hind leg as it attempted to flee again. They landed hard, skidding and crashing into smaller frogs as they did, all of whom burst into smoke. The large frog made a strangled un-frog like squawking sound as it scrambled to get out of Dai’s grip. It twisted and turned, trying to kick its leg free, but Dai stood fast. He refused to let go. 

The smaller frogs did not take kindly to that. Dozens of them leapt towards Dai, but before they could get close, Dai whirled around, swinging the large frog by its leg and using it to smack the smaller ones out of the air. 

They disappeared from existence with puffs of soot as Dai released the frog demon from his jaws, sending it sailing through the air and back towards the trees. The disgusting, oversized thing turned itself in midair and was able to land against the side of a tree hind legs first. The fact it was injured didn't seem to bother it as it sprung back towards Dai and its obnoxiously pink tongue shot from its mouth. Dai did nothing to try and dodge the attack, instead bracing himself for it. The tongue struck Dai on the shoulder with a sick thwack that was barely heard over the croaking frogs. 

Suga thought the demon frog was going to follow its tongue and collide with him, but it didn't. There was a blur of motion, black and green and pink, and a cut off high pitched scream, and before Suga could even try to figure out what had happened, he saw the results. 

Dai was standing in the same place, the demon frog's tongue dangling in his jaws while the frog laid over a meter away, twitching. The smaller frogs leapt towards the larger, croaking and crying. Dai turned towards them, dropping the tongue to give one firm bark, instantly silencing the frogs.

Suga watched as the few dozen little frogs left turned and looked up at Dai. He couldn't see what the shifter was looking at, but he was sure it was the twitching giant frog, as the thing was attempting to roll back onto its belly. 

Dai lowered his head and raised his hackles as the frog got itself up onto its feet. It opened its mouth like it was trying to croak, blood pouring from the stump that was once its tongue. Suga thought it was trying to summon more little frogs, even though they seemed useless against Dai, but he was quickly proved wrong when an acidic looking yellow bile shot out of its mouth and right towards Dai. 

Dai leapt back and away from the spray and its splash zone, which seemed to be the desired effect. The demon turned and sprang away, clearing several meters in a single bound. 

Panic surged through Suga. He didn't want the frog to flee. Dai would chase it and Suga didn't know if or when he would come back. Dai was finally in front of him and Suga didn't want to have to try to find him again. 

He wanted, needed, answers. 

As the large frog began to leap again, a disgusting squelching sound came from it. Its mouth dropped open in a silent scream and Suga watched in horror as branches began to poke their way through the frog’s hide, leaves covered in blood and gore slowly beginning to unfurl once they hit the sun light. Only once the frog demon was skewered in multiple places did purple flowers begin to bloom around it. 

Suga’s hands dropped from where they had been loosely covering his ears to instead cover his mouth. He let out a shaky breath. 

“Koushi.”

Suga forced his eyes away from the nightshade to where Sawamura was standing, nude and alone. The smaller frogs had ceased to exist. 

Suga stared as the man who claimed to be a spirit slowly started to walk forward. Part of him believed Sawamura would be able to walk right through the barrier, just as he had, but he knew, deep down, it wasn't the case. He stopped right where Suga knew the barrier was and raised a hand, pressing it against the invisible wall. 

Suga dropped his hands to his lap and slowly looked from Sawamura’s palm to his face. Concern was etched into his features, his lips turned down and his brow crinkled. 

But his eyes…

His eyes looked tired. 

Suga was tired. 

He was so tired. 

“I want to go to Sawamura,” he whispered to himself. 

Climbing to his feet was difficult, but the shell of nightshade parted around him once he was able to. The plant brushed his legs as he took the first step, and Suga felt as if he was being pushed forward, like the flowers were urging him towards Sawamura. 

Suga didn't look away from the amber eyes he had thought he had known so well as he stumbled towards Sawamura. His limbs felt heavy and he was sure his knees were going to give out at any moment, but he forced himself to keep going until he was right in front of Sawamura. Only then did he stop. 

Slowly he raised his hand and placed it on the other side of the barrier from Sawamura’s. He could feel the heat on the other man's palm against his own, but they weren't touching. It was like there was a thin piece of plastic between them. 

He followed amber eyes as they looked away from his face to look at their hands. Sawamura flexed his fingers, but nothing happened. The barrier did not budge.

_I want to go to Sawamura_ , Suga thought before curling his fingers forward. They slotted perfectly between Sawamura’s, no burst of cold interrupting them. There was only warmth, which spread through him like a fire as Sawamura yanked him forward and out of the clearing.

Suga stumbled, throwing his other hand out and placing it on Sawamura’s chest so he wouldn't fall forward just as Sawamura put a steadying hand on his hip. 

Only when Suga looked back up did he realize how close they were. He could feel Sawamura’s breath on his skin.

Suga closed his eyes a moment, taking a deep breath before opening them with a sigh. 

“Can we go back home now?”


	11. Blackberry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He hoped such a thing wouldn't become a trend; twice was a coincidence but three times was a pattern. If he needed answers again, he would need something stronger than coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright folks, I'm here to get sappy. 
> 
> This is the one year anniversary of Turn Off The Lights. I never thought I'd still be writing this after a year. For some stupid reason I thought I'd be done with it by years end. But I had some pretty big problems this past year, and my muse died. But some people were there to help me through those times, and help me get back into writing this story. I'm not going to link them, but a very big thank you to Mora, Jay, and Skitty. This chapter is for you guys, in more ways than one. 
> 
> I'd also like to thank you, the readers. Just reading this, giving it kudos and bookmarks and comments has helped me so much, inspired me to actually follow through with writing this. I never in a million years thought I'd get things like fan art for this, but I have two amazing pieces
> 
> [An amazing painting by Foxyena from tumblr](http://foxyenaarts.tumblr.com/post/159619584665/a-painting-i-did-for-a-daisuga-fanfic-i-really) and [A beautiful comic ft. Daichi's chest hair by Mlim8 from tumblr](http://mlim8.tumblr.com/post/161895515593/after-i-dress-and-you-get-your-coffee-turn-off)
> 
> so thank you guys so much and I hope you enjoy this story as much as I do.

His pillow smelled like dirt and smoke, like the remains of a campfire he had never experienced. It was faint, just a hint, but Suga wanted to bury his face into it. It reminded him of lying in front of the hearth in the cabin’s main room, stretched out and watching things on his laptop with Dai. 

It was simpler time. A simpler time where Suga wasn't so exhausted and drained at every damn moment. 

The week before felt like such a long time ago. 

Suga turned his face into the pillow and inhaled the scent. It was earthy and sent shivers down his spine, and Suga wanted to curl into it, to have it wrap around him and lull him back to sleep. It made him feel warm, and relaxed, and safe. 

He knew he was safe. Safe in the overly luxurious bed in the cabin in middle of a demonic forest.

He knew he was safe because Sawamura had practically carried him through the demonic forest and had tucked him into the overly luxurious bed with a promise he would be safe. 

He knew he was safe because he could hear purposeful foot falls and creaks in the floorboards over the morning chirpings of the birds outside his window. 

Suga groaned and rolled onto his back. What the hell was wrong with him?

Why did he feel safe with Sawamura? Just because the man-dog-spirit had rescued him from the frog demons did not mean he was trustworthy. He had lived with Suga for almost two weeks, posing as a dog. He had given Suga the Life, infected him with it, and now Suga could do magic and plants were simultaneously trying to take said magic and protect him. 

Suga just wanted answers. 

He didn't want to trust Sawamura. He didn't want to feel safe with him. 

But he did. 

And he didn't know why. 

More questions he didn't have answers to. 

Suga was tired of not having answers. He dragged his hands up to rub at his face, trying to physically push away how exhausted he still felt. He couldn't get answers by just staying in bed. 

Well, he probably could. He could yell for Sawamura and demand answers without ever sitting up but that felt anticlimactic and unsatisfactory. He needed to get up and get answers, preferably with a big cup of coffee and after a shower because he couldn't remember the last time he had taken one. Running around the forest and rolling in flowers had left him covered in dirt and sweat and he had not even thought to so much as brush his teeth before Sawamura helped him into bed. 

He took a deep breath then let his hands fall to either side of his head. He had a plan, he just needed to find the will to execute it. He knew what he needed to do, he knew why he needed to do it, but he just felt so drained that it felt impossible to get up. His limbs felt heavy and his head was fuzzy, and if he was honest with himself, he just wanted to let sleep come over him again. His dreams were easier to deal with than reality, but for once Suga maybe didn't want to run from reality.

He had hid from being sick behind late night stories, hid from Bokuto’s affections for Akaashi behind really really good sex and his own delusions. He didn't want to be a coward or a selfish jerk any longer. 

At least when it came to strange magic and demons. 

Suga pushed himself up into sitting and threw his legs over the side of the bed before he could change his mind and bury himself into his pillows. Getting himself to stand took another few moments and a small verbal command, but once he was up, it wasn't so hard to walk to the en suite. His legs didn't ache and protest like he thought they would. 

He stripped himself of his clothes and started the water for his shower before he allowed himself to look into the mirror. 

He looked like shit. 

He had bags under his eyes, his lips were chapped, and his hair looked like a greasy bird's nest. He was pretty sure there were twigs tangled into his locks, which would be oh so fun to pick out. He leaned over the sink to get a closer look as he reached up to pull down at the skin under his eyes. His pupils were slightly dilated, but his eyes didn't appear to be glassy or bloodshot. He dropped his hand to the counter, then stuck out his tongue. Besides a thin white film he definitely needed to scrub away, it looked healthy and pink. 

He looked so horrible because he was exhausted after an exciting evening in the forest. 

Suga stepped away from the sink as the mirror began to fog up and stepped into the shower. He opted to stand instead of sitting on the stool, fearful his exhaustion wouldn't let him get up, and forced himself to focus solely on washing himself. 

He began to feel like he wasn't just dragging himself through the motions as he rinsed the suds from his body and cleaned the tangles from his hair. There was something soothing about being clean that helped uplift his spirit and made it seem like everything was not going to be an uphill battle. 

He ended his shower with a third round of brushing his teeth and tongue, then shut the water off and found a towel to dry himself with. As he rubbed at his hair he took a deep breath; he had done the first step of his plan. He had gotten up and taken a shower. 

Now he just needed to make coffee and get answers from Sawamura, and hopefully the last of the tasks would be as simple as the first two. 

He hoped such a thing wouldn't become a trend; twice was a coincidence but three times was a pattern. If he needed answers again, he would need something stronger than coffee. 

Suga finished drying himself then slipped back into the bedroom, not knowing why he was trying to not make so much noise. He knew Sawamura must have known Suga was awake by now, the shower wasn't silent and stumbling out of bed hadn't been exactly quiet. Maybe he didn't want to risk Sawamura coming to check on him. Suga wanted to confront him at his own pace. 

Confronting sounded so aggressive in Suga’s mind and he didn't want to be aggressive. He just wanted answers. 

Suga bit his lip then moved to pull out the most non-confrontational outfit he could think of; a black collared button up under a cream colored sweater that had black stars on the shoulders and was the softest thing Suga owned. He paired it with black jeans, fashionably ripped at the knee and fuzzy socks. 

He reached up to run his hands through his damp hair, trying to fluff it up a little. He wanted to be as least threatening as possible, not that he could be very threatening to a Forest Guardian spirit. Sawamura could probably end him with just a look, and that didn't include the things he could probably did with magic.

Suga dropped his hands down to his eyes and scrubbed at them with his palms. 

He just wanted answers, was that so wrong of him? He wanted to understand what was happening to him and actually be able to process it without having a melt down. 

The coffee would help keep him focused. 

If he could actually convince himself to leave the room and go out to make the coffee. 

He needed answers. 

Suga took a steadying breath then stepped out of the room. 

He didn't know what he expected to see when he opened the door but it wasn’t Sawamura leaning against the back of the coach, wearing low hanging sweatpants and reading one of the novels Suga had brought with him to the cabin. It made Suga freeze in his tracks because it was so unexpected and so utterly human. He hadn't even considered the possibility of Sawamura not wearing pants until it was presented to him that Sawamura was wearing them.

“I attempted to make you coffee, but the machine was a little too complicated for me,” the man-dog-spirit across from him said as he closed the book he was holding. Sawamura looked up at Suga and the silver haired man found himself inhaling sharply. He didn't know what to think of that statement or what it could possibly even mean. He didn't know how to respond or what he could even say. He couldn't even think of words and why hadn't he thought of actual questions to ask Sawamura instead of just expecting answers. 

“You told me last time that before we talked I need to be wearing pants and you needed coffee. I found pants but there is no coffee.”

Suga’s head jerked up and he hadn't even realized he had looked down. Sawamura was watching him, his head tilted slightly to the side. He wasn't smiling but he didn't look angry. He looked like he was just waiting, being patient while Suga had yet another freak out. Over nothing at all; Sawamura was being kind. Thoughtful. 

Sawamura had never been anything but thoughtful, in a creepy haunted forest way. 

Suga took a breath, then gave a curt nod. “I need coffee. A lot of coffee. Do you, uh, would you like some?” He needed to be polite. No confrontation or being threatening.

Sawamura’s lips turned up into a little half smile and he nodded, “That would be nice, thank you.”

Suga rubbed his palms on his jeans then crossed the main room in quick strides. He could feel Sawamura watching him and it just wanted to make him move faster. He didn't feel threatened or like prey but he could feel his nerves start to stir in his belly and being watched was embarrassing. He was making a fool of himself, being such a wreck. 

He had been the one to seek out Sawamura after telling him to leave, had been the one to invite him back to the cabin. 

The can of ground coffee was sitting on the counter by the coffee maker, its lid off. There were two mugs beside it, and Suga couldn't help but smile a little. The coffee maker was not a difficult machine to work and the fact the shape shifting man-dog-spirit in the other room couldn't figure out it made him seem less terrifying for some reason. 

Suga added water and a filter to the machine before pouring in enough grounds for two people. He hoped Sawamura liked his coffee strong. 

He debated making toast or rice, but his stomach turned at the idea of actually eating anything. He was too tense and if he ate he'd probably throw it up. He could eat after he got answers.

And hopefully the answers made him relax a little and not turn into even more of a wreck. With demons and magic and everything else in the forest, maybe the answers would not be what he wanted to hear. 

But that didn't mean he wasn't going to still ask his questions. 

Suga took down mugs from the cupboard and added cream and sugar to both. The moment the coffee machine began to beep, he pulled the pot out and poured the brew into the mugs. 

There was something about the scent of coffee had always been soothing to him and Suga wondered if that was why the little beads of Life that had come from him smelled of it. 

There, he had a concrete question to ask Sawamura instead of a vague ‘what is happening to me?’ It was a step in the right direction and proof coffee helped him focus. 

Suga put the cream and sugar away then picked up the mugs with a deep breath. He took a moment to gather himself, build up his courage, then walked back out to the main room. 

Sawamura had moved from leaning against the back of the couch to sitting on it, in the corner and giving Suga the rest of the couch to sit on. 

Considerate as before. 

Maybe Suga didn't need to be so nervous around Sawamura. After all, Sawamura had never actually hurt him, as a person or as Dai. All he had ever done was protect Suga. 

In turn, Suga should probably give him a little trust. 

He sat down near the center of the couch, a respectable distance from Sawamura but not tucked into the corner. The man-dog-spirit watched him cautiously, then gave a small smile when Suga held out the coffee mug towards him. Sawamura took out, careful to not brush his fingers against Suga’s.

“Thank you.”

Suga closed his eyes and took a long sip of coffee. It warmed his mouth, his throat, his core. It, like it always had, made him feel like the world would make more sense.

When he opened his eyes again, Sawamura was looking at him, clearly amused by something. Before Suga could even scowl, Sawamura spoke.

“You were smiling while you drank your coffee. You looked relaxed.”

Suga blinked at the statement. He hadn't realized he had been smiling. “It is relaxing.“

Sawamura nodded, then his small smile faded into something more neutral as he began to speak. “What were you doing in the Forest? It is not safe for you to be in there, especially alone.”

Suga frowned. He was the one supposed to be asking questions, not the one answering them. He had assumed when Sawamura had mentioned coffee before talking that Sawamura knew Suga wanted to know the truth. He had never suspected Sawamura needed his own answers. 

“I was looking for you.”

Sawamura’s brows knit at the response, “You did not need to go into the Forest, you could have called for me. I would have heard you.”

Suga stared at the being across from him, frustrating bubbling up inside of him. 

“I didn't know that,” Suga said with a little more bite than was necessarily polite. “I told you to leave and you left and I didn't know how to find you.”

That had Sawamura’s mouth dipping into its own scowl, “You went into the Forest blindly? Knowing the danger? I know you do not -”

“No!” Suga all but shouted, cutting him off and nearly splashing his coffee when he rocked forward to make his point, “No! There was something in me, in my chest. It was leading me to you. It knew where you were. I was following it.“

“Something in your chest? Lead you into the Forest?” The skepticism and worry in Sawamura’s voice was clear. 

Suga huffed and moved to set his coffee mug on the table in front of him. “It was the Life, I think. You know, this would be easier from the beginning. Then you can answer my questions because I don't know what is happening to me.” Except Suga didn't have any specific questions to ask. He just needed answers. 

The man-dog-spirit across from him looked Suga up and down, probably questioning to believe Suga, before leaning forward and placing his mug next to Suga’s. 

“What is happening to you?” he asked as he sat back up. 

Suga took a breath, exhaling it a little shakily and looked down to his lap. If he was explaining the day before to anyone else, he knew he would sound insane, but the being in front of him was some sort of shape shifting forest guardian spirit. Sawamura had been the one to introduce Suga to magic and demons. The problem was, Suga was still processing what had happened to him and he didn't know how to accurately describe anything in a logical way.

“The flowers,” he started hesitantly, so unsure if Sawamura would understand the picture he was going to paint, “they called to me. The ones by the trees outside. They got my attention, and some of them were dead, and they just like… I went to them even when I told myself not to. And I thought about the Life you gave me and I wanted to help the flowers and…” He trailed off because it all sounded so fantastical once spoken out loud. 

“You gave them Life?” Sawamura prompted, his brow knit in concern. Suga couldn't tell if it was over the action or the events leading up to it. 

“I did,” Suga said with a nod of his head. “Little bubbles of Life. They smelled like coffee and lemons when they popped.” He lifted his head, looking up to Sawamura properly. “Why did they smell like coffee?”

“That is your essence, what your soul translates as a reason to live. Given your reaction to your coffee, it makes sense.“

Suga wrinkled his brow, the frustration that he had felt disappearing with confusion, “My reason to live is coffee?”

The man-dog-spirit across from him ducked his head a little, a small smile on his lips, “That is a bad way to put it. When you think of things to live for, to fight for, there are big things and small things. A cup of coffee is tangible. You can smell it, taste it. Associate goodness and life to it. Your soul picked it because it has such a positive effect on you.”

Suga found himself frowning, even if he understood. “What about you, what does yours smell like?” he asked, not able to help his curiosity.

Sawamura took a breath, his head tilting back to look up at the ceiling, before answering, “my mother's perfume. Wildflowers.”

Suga closed his eyes, thinking of his own mother's perfume. He had no idea what it smelled like, but he could picture the little bottle clearly. He got it for her every year for her birthday. 

What would she think of the mess he had gotten himself into? 

She'd be worried sick over all the mud and muck he had managed to encounter.

“So, you gave the flowers Life?” Sawamura asked, bringing Suga‘s focus back to the tale he was meant to be telling. 

He tilted his head back, looking up to the ceiling as he tried to recall things with as much accuracy as he could manage. “I wanted to find you. I asked the thing inside me, the Life, to bring me to you. It told me to go into the Forest and it felt right. I don't...I can't describe it. It was just right, you know? Everything was going fine until that big frog showed up. Then the thing inside me lead me to the field and the frogs couldn't get in the field because a barrier. Oh, but, the big frog threw up a bunch of smaller frogs so it was a frog army before it chased me. And there was a shrine in the field, with a body, but he was alive and…” Suga trailed off, dropping his head down into his awaiting hands. 

He rubbed at his temples, feeling like far too much had happened and each element was more outrageous than the next. “Flowers protected me from the weird shadow that came from the body. Then you showed up.” He tilted his head and looked up through his fingers at Sawamura. “That is what happened to me. All while I was barefoot.” 

Sawamura’s lips turned up slightly at the final comment. He leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees and looking so non-threatening Suga wanted to reach out and jab him in the side. He wanted to tell him to stop making Suga wanting to trust him, to completely let his guard down around him. Sawamura was a strange spirit who was supposedly from another plane, not a therapist. 

“You do have the problem with going out barefoot.” 

Suga turned his face back into his hands with a small groan. 

“What is your first question?” Sawamura asked after a few long silent moments. 

Suga didn't have any specific questions and he didn't know how to tell Sawamura that. He needed a moment to think. 

He reached for his coffee and took a long sip. It warmed his insides, his soul, and he thought of the Life inside of him. The Life that smelled like coffee and was supposed to be keeping him alive. 

“Why was I…. compelled to go to that flower patch and give it Life? Are other things going to be able to get me to do that?” He asked, looking over to Sawamura. 

The calm, trusting smile on the spirit’s face faltered and panic shot through Suga’s core. 

“You should not be giving your Life away. You are recovering and you need it for your own health. I am not sure why you were… compelled was the word you used and it seems accurate, but it is concerning. I will look into it for you. There are other beings more familiar with Life than I am and they will have answers. My suggestion would be to stay inside for now, at least until you are less dependent on the Life.”

Suga frowned a little, the panic not going away, “How long would I have to stay inside? What if the thing inside me gets me to go outside? I mean, my feet just moved on their own.”

Sawamura pushed himself up, moving to lean back against the arm of the couch, “Only a few days, hopefully. You were so exhausted last night, but you look better now. That is a good sign. You are recovering, and, if it would make you feel even a little bit safer, I can stay and watch over you. Make sure nothing calls you out from the house and put some wards around the perimeter for good measure.”

Suga’s heart skipped a beat at the offer. He had invited Sawamura back to talk; he had never expected him to stay. He wasn't sure how he felt about the idea, since he had told Sawamura to leave, but his first reaction wasn't wholly negative. 

Why did he trust Sawamura so much?

“If you would feel more comfortable, I could stay outside.”

“No!” Suga all but yelped, his mouth working before his mind could even process what was said. Once his brain caught up, he quickly added on, “You don't have to do that. Stay outside, I mean. The… making sure I don't get pulled back into the forest, I would greatly appreciate that. It takes some of the worry away.”

Sawamura nodded, looking over Suga as he did, like he was trying to determine if Suga was being honest or just polite. Suga didn't know the answer himself, and if Sawamura found it, he didn't share. 

“What about the flowers, the ones that protected me?” Suga asked, trying to draw the conversation back to getting answers. Besides the mystery of how he had been lured to the dying flowers, why the nightshade had sprouted and acted like it had had been one of his biggest questions. 

Sawamura pursed his lips in thought before asking, “You have never used any sort magic before?” 

Suga shook his head, mouthing ‘no’ as he did. The most supernatural thing he had ever done before coming into the forest had been attempting to use a Ouija board, but Iwaizumi had taken it away from him and Oikawa before they had gotten to properly set it up. He had probably kept them from summoning some sort of demon. 

“And I do not believe Life has the ability to create magical ability, not like what I saw. Transferring energy is not the same as summoning plants, especially without meaning to. That leads me to believe that maybe it was not you who summoned the plants. That clearing is home to a skittish little flower sprite and she is the one who created and maintains the barrier. She has not let anything through in decades, as far as I know, but she let you into the clearing. She most likely protected you from whatever spells she has in there.” 

Suga turned his mug in his hand as he thought over Sawamura’s explanation, trying to push out the anxious energy inside of him. It almost all made sense, save one painfully obvious detail. 

“The flowers were nightshade. They aren't native to here, I think, and they are pretty personal to me.”

Sawamura looked at Suga with a tilt of his head, then gave a small shrug, “Yachi is a clever and observant little thing. I would not put it past her to be able to choose a flower you find non-threatening. She is a flower sprite, after all.” 

It made sense and Suga wanted to accept it because it eased his worries, but something about it felt wrong. He didn't want to push the issue and be argumentative, but he wanted a more definitive answer. 

“When you ask the other beings about the Life, can you ask about the nightshade? I don't want to accidentally summon a bunch and cover the yard.”

“I can do that,” Sawamura said with a nod, “I may not be the best with magic but I will get you answers.” He paused, then added, “I would like you to meet with a Healer. He can give you a more accurate timeline of how long you need to stay inside.” 

Suga thought a moment, considering the pros and cons, which mostly consisted of his immediate nerves regarding anything to do with doctors, mystical or not, but he eventually gave a nod. It would be less nerve wracking the more information he had. He did want answers. 

“Instead of thinking of having to stay inside as something negative, you could think of it as having time to focus on your work. No being distracted by wandering out into the trees.”

Suga flushed at the mention of his manuscript and pointedly looked away, guilt going through him. He hadn't even thought of his novel that morning. He had lost so much time while already being so far behind. Maybe it would be a good thing to be trapped in the cabin. He would be forced to bunker down and actually work. 

He needed that, though, to close his mind to the chaos going on around him. He wouldn't be hiding, he just needed a break from demons and magic and frogs. 

After he got his answers. 

“What is Life, exactly? You kind of explained before, but I honestly wasn't really listening, given the circumstances. I get it is keeping me alive, helping me recover from being ill but…. what is it?”

Sawamura took a breath, settling back into cushions before he began to speak, “Life is what makes up everything. Its natural magic, energy, that keeps things flowing. All living things have it. As something begins to die, it loses its Life, but the process can be reversed if new Life is given to it.”

Suga took in the information with a nod, licking his lips a little as he did, “That makes sense. But....you gave me some of your Life? Doesn't that put you into danger?”

Sawamura shook his head, “No. Normally, it would, but, as a Guardian I can take in Life from the Forest, channel the excess it creates for myself. I got permission from the Trees to give you some of that excess, flow it into you through me.” He paused a moment, tilting his head in thought, “Which is probably why things were so intent on devouring you. You do not just have Life in you, you have ancient Life.”

Suga made a face at that; he was not at all keen on being eaten by frogs or whatever else was in the forest. 

He took the last long sip of his coffee, thinking over what he had learned. It wasn't a lot of information, but what he had learned had soothed some of his anxiety. Maybe because he wasn't learning it all in a panic, but most of it seemed logical to an extent. As logical as magic and demons could be. The Life was charging him back up like it was a battery, and somehow the flowers had gotten him to give up his charge. He just needed to avoid anything that could take his charge until he was stable enough to run on his own. 

But there was still one thing that had been bugging him and he knew Sawamura could give him a clear answer for it.

“Why did you save me?”

It was Sawamura's turn to flush and turn away. Suga found his cheeks heating up at the reaction but he refused to look away. He wanted to know. 

But he did clutch his mug a little tighter with his nerves. 

Sawamura took a few long moments to answer, like he was gathering himself before talking, but once he began, his voice dropped to something a little softer. 

“You have got a good soul. You are kind, well meaning, funny. You are a bright spot in this world without having the added Life in you. I enjoyed being with you and I was not going to let your brightness fade if I had a way to preserve it.” He took a breath, pausing while his eyes moved from looking at the far wall to looking at Suga. “It was almost selfish of me. I wanted to keep you alive because I enjoyed your company. Playing with you, watching the things on your computer with you. I did not want to lose that.”

Suga licked his lips, his heart pounding a little in his chest. He remembered vaguely, as he did with a majority of their first conversation, Sawamura mentioning brightness and company but he hadn't thought he was serious. He had thought he was going to get an answer about how it was his duty as a Guardian to save people or something, but he supposed that was not the case. He had the feeling that if Sawamura hadn't been fond of him, he could have died. 

That scared him a little, but he had been worth saving. Sawamura had said all of those kind things about him. 

He couldn't remember the last time someone talked so positively about him without mentioning his writing. 

He didn't know how to respond to it, so he changed the subject completely. 

“You mentioned putting up wards?” 

Sawamura nodded and moved to lean forward, reaching out to start tracing figures on the coffee table. “Yes. I am not the best with magic but I know my share. Simple protection wards placed in the four corners of the house. It would keep lesser beings away.”

“And.. not lesser beings?” Suga didn't know if he had met anything that qualified as a not lesser being besides Sawamura and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out. 

“They know better than to come this way. Asahi and Tanaka would chase them off if they did try to get near the clearing.”

“Asahi and...Tanaka?”

The corners of Sawamura's lips turned up into a small smile, “The two crows that come by. They are my right hands and they are fond of you as well.”

“Are they…?” Suga started, his question trailing off. 

Sawamura nodded, “Crow demons. They have the ability to shift as well. Tanaka actually enjoys going into town.”

Suga wondered if he had ever seen the crow during one of his visits to the town.

Despite his earlier thoughts of not wanting to know about what he had met, his curiosity got the better of him, “Is everything in the Forest not from this realm? Even…. the people I've met here?”

“Well… some of the smaller things, song birds, butterflies, and rabbits, they have traveled from neighboring forests and mountains, but pretty much, most living things here can cross realms. The Forest has a natural crossing point between realms. Many creatures of your world sense it and stay away, but on the other side, many things crossover and settle here. This is, for the most part, a very peaceful place. There are a few dangerous beings in the Forest, but you bare my mark, my bond, so they should not bother you.”

Suga nodded; even the safest places had dangers. He focused on the words at the end. 

“You mentioned a bond before… that's how I saw you in my dreams?”

Sawamura gave an affirming hum as he sat back up straight, “It is from me giving you my Life. It occurs naturally during the process. You now have a bond with the flowers as well, but since they do not have a mind, it is not as strong. That perhaps was the thing in your chest leading you to me. It is also how I could have heard you if you had called for me.”

“I didn't know that,” Suga said, a little defensive over the subject. 

Sawamura lifted a hand up, putting up a barrier between him and Suga’s defensiveness, “I know. I had considered leaving a note…”

“But?”

Sawamura ducked his head, that sweet smile turning sheepish, “I could not remember how to write. I have not done it in so long. It is kind of hard to hold a pen with paws.”

The imagery of a dog the size of Dai trying to hold a pen had Suga giving a little snort of laughter. 

Once his amusement had passed, looked up to Sawamura, surprised to see another soft look. He returned the smile with little hesitation, thinking of how he had relaxed during their conversation. He had been so anxious and tense beforehand and most of it seemed to seep out of him. He didn't know if he should be worried about it or not, but he decided to just accept it. 

“Do you have more questions? I know a lot has happened.” Sawamura asked, looking over Suga. 

Suga took a breath, thinking it over, then shook his head, “No, nothing at the moment. It's still a lot to take in.”

Sawamura nodded, then with a small rock, pushed himself into standing, “Take it in and try to relax. Eat something. I will go place the wards around the house, start to try to make you feel a little more secure.”

He walked around the table and towards the entrance of the cabin without waiting for confirmation, and Suga was almost glad for it. He had no longer had any idea on what he should say, what he should feel. 

He looked down at the empty mug in his hands and the only thing he could that would cross his mind was hope that he could manage to finish his manuscript with everything that had happened. 

He could face demons and magic and monsters, but there was no way he would survive Kiyoko’s wrath if she ever learned how far behind he was. 

He needed more coffee.

+++

It had taken time to get back into the groove of working on his novel. He had forgotten where he had left off and it had been difficult to get his mind to focus on it, but after two cups of coffee and a small meal, everything clicked into place.

Suga thought it would have been awkward, editing with someone else in the room, but he found he didn't so much mind Sawamura's presence. The man-dog-spirit had simply picked up the book he had been reading and settled himself down. 

The sounds of birds chirping and pages during had been a pleasant soundtrack to work to. He didn't even realize how much time had passed, how much work he had gotten done, until Sawamura was closing his book and placing it on the coffee table. 

As Suga glanced up over to him, he realized the sunlight coming through the windows was fading and the chirping of the birds had stopped. 

“May I ask you a question?” Sawamura started, breaking the silence of the room. Once Suga nodded his approval, he continued, “I know you are writing a novel, but what is it about? You have read to me bits and pieces, but I have not been able to figure it out.”

Suga pushed himself up and away from his laptop as he thought over his answer, taking the moment to stretch. “Well, I suppose it would be classified a psychological horror. Bordering on supernatural, but I'm kind of iffy on that label since it isn't explicitly touched upon. But I pitched it as a group of friends who go traveling in some foreign country side. I never say where because it just starts out going, but in my mind it's in Russia. But, anyways, they are driving, passing abandoned industrial farms and the person driving just swerves right into a tree for no reason. The person in the front seat dies and the driver just gets out and runs off. And then when the group is trying to figure out what to do, it's like ten people, someone else snaps and just attacks another person. Kills them by smashing their face with a rock. But then after, they don't know why they attacked them. They just needed to. And it goes on like that. One by one, snapping, attacking each other for no reason. If they have to kill to get it out of their system. They never know who is next, they never find out why. It ends with the main character finding someone to hitchhike with, then he feels the urge to kill and moves to attack to driver.”

Sawamura wrinkled his nose a little at the description, “That sounds… dark.”

“Horror novels tend to be,” Suga replied with no malice. He was used to such comments by now. He had a deep love of horror and understood it was not for everyone. Getting offended it wasn't someone's cup of tea was useless. 

“Is it going well? Your writing?” Sawamura asked, sounding genuinely interested as opposed to just being polite with small talk. 

Suga gave a little shrug, “I'm done with the majority of the writing. Now I'm going through editing each chapter. Looking for mistakes, continuity errors. There are some places where at the moment I couldn't think of a word or description and just made a note to add it in later, so I need to do that.”

Sawamura made a little hum in understanding, “That does not seem like it would take long?”

“It's actually pretty draining,” Suga said with a shake of his head. “I do this first run through, then I send it to someone whose job it is to edit manuscripts. They make their notes, send it back to me, and we go back and forth until we are both satisfied. Then there's what happens after the editing process and that is a whole other headache.”

“But it is not your first novel, correct? You have one that is going to be a show.”

Suga ducked his head, his lips turning up into a pleased smile, “Yeah. That is a short story, but yeah. It's going to be part of an anthology. The plan is it will be about an hour long. I'm really excited about it, but yeah, it isn't my first novel. I've got this process down. I just need to sit and focus on doing it.”

“And you have the time now,” Sawamura pointed out. 

Suga flopped back into the couch, tilting his head a little lazily towards Sawamura, “But now I'm tired. That was four chapters. If I do too much, I'll be burned out, then I'll get nothing done at all, even if I have all the time in the world.”

Sawamura gave a small huff, sounding faintly amused, “And now?”

Suga swallowed, his throat suddenly feeling dry and his mind going a little blank. 

He hadn't thought that far ahead. 

He had been so focused on his work he hadn't really thought over the fact Sawamura was going to stay with him for a while. He had been sitting less than a meter away from Suga for hours but it had not sunk into him until that moment. 

It was strange and slightly uncomfortable. Suga was slowly becoming more relaxed around the spirit, but the anxiety and strangeness of the situation was ever present. How exactly was he supposed to interact with Sawamura? Ignoring him would be rude but Suga didn't know what to treat him as. Being with Dai had been easy, but a person, who could vocally respond and had so many strange circumstances revolving around him was an entirely different matter. Did Suga treat him like a roommate? Would he have to cook for Sawamura? Suga wasn't sure he had enough food to feed two grown men. Would he be okay lounging around like he had been as Dai or would he need something to keep him occupied? 

There was so much to consider and Suga didn't want to think of it. It was just adding onto his pile of confusion and he was already so overwhelmed. 

Why couldn't any of it just be easy, why did he have to-

“Would you like to watch our show?” Sawamura asked, interrupting Suga’s mild panic attack. 

Suga nodded, unable to speak around the lump that had formed in his throat. 

Watching something would provide a much needed distraction and wind down. Suga wouldn't have to think for a bit and that was sorely needed after a morning of explanations and an afternoon of editing. 

He just wanted to turn off his brain. 

Sawamura nodded back, giving a little reassuring smile like he knew Suga was on the verge of a break down, then stood up. “You get that ready and I will make us something to drink and some snacks. It has been a while since you last ate.”

Suga watched as Sawamura disappeared into the kitchen, his panic slowly ebbing away. 

He would be okay. Sawamura had offered to protect him, keep him from being lured away by the call of the trees. He didn't have to play host. 

Things would be fine. 

Suga took a deep breath, trying to steady himself, then moved to save and close out the document he had open. He brought up his browser and the streaming site, getting it set up the right episode. They had left off at any interesting spot and it would be easy to get sucked back into the plot. 

After all, it had been a much welcome distraction the night Sawamura had first tried to explain everything. 

Suga looked to the kitchen as the smell of toast filled the cabin, wondering what the man-dog-spirit could possibly be making. 

He found out a few minutes later as Sawamura came out carrying a tray. Suga tried to sit up a little straighter to try and see what Sawamura had made, but he couldn't until the tray was placed on the table. It was very similar to the meal he had made a few nights before; cocoa, toast, and cut up fruit. It was simple but it looked wonderful and would be perfect for snacking.

Suga eagerly reached out and scooped up one of the mugs. He remembered how delicious the cocoa Sawamura had made before was and was a little greedy for it, bringing it to his lips for a drink. It was warm and rich and was almost as soothing as coffee. There was a pleasant little tingle down his spine as he finished his long sip. 

It made him smile. 

When he opened his eyes, Sawamura was watching him, holding his own mug. He felt his cheeks heat up at the soft look in his amber eyes. Suga pointedly looked back to the laptop screen. 

“Ready?”

Sawamura gave a nod and reached out to tap the spacebar for the laptop, starting up the show. 

Suga settled back into the couch after picking up a piece of toast. He was going to get crumbs everywhere but part of him didn't care. He just wanted to relax and not over think anymore. 

It took half an episode, three pieces of toast, and the full mug of cocoa for Suga to start to actually unwind. He sank back into the cushions and part of him wished he had had the forethought to get a blanket. He didn't want to get up and go get one and he didn't want to be rude and ask Sawamura to get it. 

He wasn't completely cozy but he was very content by the end of the first episode they watched, curled up in the corner. As the next episode started and the drama started picking up as they made their way towards the season finale, Suga found himself doing something he normally did not do. 

He started talking during a show. 

“Are places like the Dreamlands real?” he asked, not taking his eyes off the laptop screen. “I mean, the concept shows up in a fair amount of literature, especially in that old school horror style. Is there any truth to it?”

He heard Sawamura hum in thought before he began to answer. “I have not encountered anything quite like what they are showing. There are realms only accessible by dreams. Our bond has shown that. But they are more like... pocket realms that do not hold such danger. The more permanent realms that have that dreamy aspect, which do have ancient beings, are not ones I travel to.”

“What type of realms do you travel to?” Suga asked, his curiosity peaked. It was something strange he could barely comprehend, but it didn't affect him personally so it wasn't completely overwhelming. 

“Only a handful, and not very often. Mostly my own realm, which is very much just like the Forest, but… more grand, I suppose. Realms for some of the other creatures here. Tanaka and Asahi come from an interesting realm, something a little more industrial, like one of your modem cities. I prefer to stay here, in the Forest.”

Suga nodded, humming in interest. It wasn't a big scary answer and part of him was curious to see different realms, but mostly he was glad that something like what was depicted in the show wasn't a definite reality. Sawamura had mentioned ancient beings, but lack of Old Gods and tentacle faced demons brought some relief. 

“What about all the things in the zoo?” Suga asked, pointing to the screen. He felt there was a certain amount of irony involved in the situation, the similarities between himself and the characters in the scene. He doubted he would be so calm in such a situation, even if it was meant to be a date. 

Sawamura shrugged, “Probably, but not in the Forest.” 

The rest of the zoo scene, Sawamura pointed out creatures he had met before, telling Suga whether or not the CGI was accurate, and speculating about others. He had never seen a gryphon before, but told Suga he had heard stories about their tempers. 

Suga found he didn't mind Sawamura’s talking. It wasn't rambly or overly distraction; very simple “I have met one of those before, they do not look nearly as pretty as that” or “I thought they would be larger than that.”

The best moment was when the man-dog-spirit commented he had no idea what a jabberwock was. It sent Suga into a small peel off laughter and when he finally calmed down, he could not keep the smile off of his face. 

As the episode ended, Sawamura stood, picking up the mugs as he did. “More cocoa?”

Suga gave a nod with a “Yes, please” as he used his foot to pause the show. He was far too lazy to sit up to do it. 

Sawamura began to move towards the kitchen, then hesitated. “Would you like it enchanted? I know a simple little spell to help you to relax more. I am aware that is what you are trying to achieve. My mother used to call it a blanket for the soul, and as an added bonus it would prevent any bad dreams.”

Suga sucked on his lips as he considered the options. He didn't want to partake in any more magic, but no bad dreams would be ideal. He nodded. 

Sawamura smiled and Suga wasn't quite sure why, but he smiled back. He told himself to not think it over and scooped up his phone to bring the show’s trivia page to help distract himself. 

Sawamura returned a few minutes later, the mugs of cocoa steaming and, if possible, smelling even richer of chocolate. In any other circumstance, Suga would have been ashamed of the pleased noise he made when he got the mug into his hands, but the heavenly aroma made it hard to care. He took a long sip of the drink and felt the remaining tense muscles in his body relax. 

It really was a blanket for his soul. 

“That is so good,” he mumbled when he finally managed to pull the mug from his lips. 

“I figured we would need it. The little box says this is the season finale and I have the feeling something terrible is going to happen.”

+++

“It can't have ended like that. You can't kill off the main character.”

“There is another episode, right? You have talked of the second season.”

Suga made a face, shaking his head a little. “It isn't up, yet. They are advertising it. Do you want to watch the trailer?”

Sawamura nodded and Suga moved to bring it up. “I think the cocoa was a good idea. It dampened the dramatic effect. I don't feel all traumatized.” 

“That was the desired effect. It was just as enjoyable, though.” 

Suga hummed in agreement, then played the trailer. They ohhed and ahhed as they watched it, watching for a hint of the main character who was brutally killed off in the season finale. There was none and it only made Suga more intrigued. 

“Would you like to watch something else? The thing about the oceans looked interesting, the one you had been watching.”

Suga nodded, pulling up the documentary series Sawamura had mentioned. He was starting to feel tired and heavy, but his mind was still too active from the intensity of the show for him to even try to sleep. A good nature documentary, and more cocoa, would help lull him into a nice warm state of tiredness.

It was easy to close his eyes and relax into the couch and it did not take long for his mind to start to slow and become fuzzy. 

When he realized he was fading in and out and hadn't even processed they had watched an entire episode about deep sea life, Suga knew it was time to move from the couch to the bedroom. It was a struggle to get his eyes open, but once he did, he knew it would be impossible to stand. He felt so cozy and nice and he could totally sleep right where he was without a blanket. 

So when he began to move he was completely surprised. He felt safe and warm as he was lifted up, so he didn't fight it, but he did let out a confused, undignified little “hnng?”

“You have been trying to get up for ten minutes. Let me help you get to bed,” a soft but steady voice replied. 

Suga tilted his head up, looking up at Sawamura's jaw. It was strong and there were hints of stubble starting to poke through. 

It made him smile. He liked stubble. He liked the little scratchy feeling against his skin. 

Bokuto never had stubble. 

Suga wanted to reach up and touch it, feel it against the palm of his hand, but his arm felt too heavy to move. He settled with turning his hand and resting it against Sawamura's chest. 

He was so warm and Suga wanted to curl into him and steal that warmth like he had done so many times with Dai. 

He missed Dai. He missed sleeping with Dai, using him as a pillow. 

He knew Dai and Sawamura were one being, but it wasn't the same. It would never be the same. 

He wanted it to be the same. 

He didn't realize he was being lowered until he was laid out on the mattress and Suga made a displeased noise at the loss of body heat. 

“Shhh, it is almost time to sleep,” was the gentle response. 

Through cracked eyes, Suga watched as Sawamura licked his lips, then reached to undo the buttons of Suga’s jeans. He felt no threat and even tried to raise up his hips to help him slide them off. 

“Those would not have been comfortable to sleep in. Do you want your top off as well?”

Suga must have nodded in some shape or form because Sawamura helped him sit up and pull off his sweater and button up. They were dropped somewhere as Sawamura turned down the covers of the bed and laid him back down. 

Suga’s eyes roamed over bare chest as Sawamura started to tuck him into bed and once again, Suga’s mouth worked without permission from his brain. 

“Stay in here tonight.”

Sawamura froze. “Why?”

“Because you're warm and I want you to,” was Suga’s eloquent and thought out response. It was the truth, though, and Sawamura seemed to accept that. He finished tucking Suga in then laid down beside him without any sort of wariness. 

Suga rolled to face the spirit, looking at him with heavy eyes. “You're gentle with me,” he started, his words a little slurred with sleep. He had no idea what he meant, if it was bad or good. It was just a fact. 

“I want to take care of you. Make you comfortable. Make sure you are safe and happy. ”

“Why?”

Sawamura tilted his head to look at Suga. Through the moonlight, he could see the small movements of Sawamura's eyes, dancing over his own face.

“Because you deserve it.” 

Suga’s heart began to pound in his chest, in his ears. It wasn't anxiety or fear.

It was nice. It was the nice pounding that made him giddy and breathless and he couldn't remember the last time he had felt it.

“You kissed me,” he whispered, barely breathing the words. 

“I am sorry for -”

He was cut off by Suga rocking forward and pressing their lips together. 

It was awkward. Their noses were squished against each other and Sawamura's shoulder was pushing into Suga’s chest and there absolutely no leverage. Sawamura's lips were chapped and Suga was sure his weren't any better.

It was perfect. 

He pulled back after a long moment, just enough to leave a millimeter between them. When Sawamura spoke, his lips brushed Suga’s.

“Koushi?”

“Don't,” Suga whispered, “Don't want to think. Just want.” 

He didn't want to think about what he was doing or the consequences or any of it. 

He wanted to be selfish. He wanted to kiss and feel stubble against his cheeks. He wanted to be held and feel wanted. 

He wanted to be taken care of by someone who looked at him and didn't see anyone else. 

“I want it. Take care of me. ”

Sawamura reacted instantly, rolling onto his side and a hand going to Suga’s waist. He pulled Suga flush against him and kissed him with such a hunger Suga thought he was going to be rolled onto his back. 

The only thing Suga could do was respond. His hand crawled up to cup Sawamura's cheek and he moaned at the coarse hairs and warmth against his palm. 

He wanted to nip and bite and lick his way into Sawamura's mouth, but his mind and body were still hazy with sleep and all he could barely keep up with the passionate pace Sawamura had set. 

The spirit seemed to realize it after a dizzying minute and broke the kiss with a pant. 

Suga didn't want him to stop.

He chased Sawamura's lips with a little whine, reconnecting them with a slower, lazier speed. They both melted into it easily. 

Suga moved his other hand to press against Sawamura's chest. Warmth seeped through him as he felt Sawamura's muscles. 

He was so strong and it made Suga a little weak kneed to think about. He had been able to lift Suga up so easily and all of his strength was practical. His muscles were not for show; he was Guardian and he used them to protect his domain. 

It made them that much more attractive and Suga wanted to run his hands over them, feel how toned Sawamura really was. 

Sawamura seemed to have the same idea. 

The hand on Suga’s waist smoothed down his side, thumbing lightly at the waistband of his briefs before running down to the backside of his thigh. There, Sawamura gripped him then pulled him even closer, so his leg was wrapped around Sawamura's thigh. 

Suga moaned against Sawamura's lips and pressed up against the spirit as much as he could. 

They were almost the same height, but Suga felt so small next to Sawamura. He felt like his leg was wrapped around a tree trunk. There was so much power thrumming through the body he was pressed against and it made him want so much more. He wanted to be wrapped up in all of that power and be made to feel safe and cared for. 

“You're beautiful,” Sawamura whispered against his lips, his hand moving up Suga’s body again, caressing over his ass and stopping at the small of his back. “You're beautiful and you are shining so brightly right now. Look like a star.”

Suga shuddered at the words and a small whimper escaped his lips. He didn't know how to respond. It was so much but it was so simple. 

Suga tugged him back into a kiss, something a little harder and firmer, but still dizzyingly slow.

He could get lost in kissing Sawamura. 

He opened his mouth when Sawamura's tongue brushed over his lips and moaned again as he was pulled even closer as the kiss deepened. It felt like there was no more space between them and Suga was okay with that. He wanted to be touching Sawamura at every point. 

He pushed his hips forward, trying to convey that, and moaned when his half hard cock pressed against Sawamura's stomach. Sawamura responded with rocking his own hips forward, showing Suga how hard he was. 

It left him gasping and giving another shudder, “Sawamura..”

“Call me Daichi,” Sawamura mumbled against him, his lips moving from Suga’s own to kiss along his jaw. Suga rolled his head back, giving him more access to his neck.

“Daichi…” Suga breathed out, testing it on his tongue. It felt good. Less clunky than his family name. He gave another moan of it as Sawamura's stubble scratched along his cheek. Sawamura gave an approving groan and pressed Suga even more firmly against him, grinding up his hips as he did. 

The noise that came from Suga’s throat was indecent. 

“You sound so good,” Sawamura growled, legitimately growled like a beast, against Suga’s neck. His teeth scraped over Suga’s skin and it was so much, but it was so good. Suga made a little needy whimper and rocked his hips, his cock, against Sawamura.

“Please,” he moaned, not even knowing what he wanted, just that he wanted more. He wanted to be taken care of. 

Sawamura nodded against him, his stubble scratching Suga and making him shudder, before he kissed back up to Suga’s lips. 

“Okay,” Sawamura whispered against his lips between feather light kisses, “okay.”

Sawamura's hand traced down Suga’s back, barely touching him, until he reached his briefs, then he pushed his fingers under the waistband. Suga arched his back, pressing against his hand as it slid under his briefs. Sawamura palmed over his ass before giving it a firm squeeze. He gasped against Sawamura's lips. 

His fingers were calloused and rough, but they felt so good kneading into the meat of Suga’s ass. His hand easily covered an entire cheek and it made Suga feel small again. It was a heady feeling. 

A surprised but wanting little moan escaped his lips when similar thick and rough fingers tangled into his hair and gave a gentle tug. He gave in easily, so pliant as Sawamura guided his head back so he could scrape his teeth over Suga’s neck. 

Suga’s hand dropped from Sawamura's cheek and skated down his collarbone and bicep to reach around to his shoulder. He dug his fingers into the muscle there, groaning at how he felt so wrapped up by the spirit. 

The nips turned into drags of Sawamura's tongue which in turned morphed into sucking. Suga wondered if he was going to leave a mark and quickly decided he didn't care. It felt too good to care. 

The intensity of everything increased as Sawamura squeezed Suga’s ass and pulled him forward so they could grind against each other. 

Suga clawed at his back, trying to get impossibly closer, rocking his hips with Sawamura's encouragement. “Daichi…”

“That's it,” Sawamura growled against his neck, “So good.”

Greed and need surged through Suga. He wanted to feel Sawamura, not just be felt by him, as enjoyable as it was. He began to drag the hand that was on the spirit's chest down, feeling over the planes of his abdomen. He could feel how defined his stomach was, behind the raises of scars and smattering of hair. He wanted to very much follow his fingers down with his tongue, but he didn't want to interrupt Sawamura lavishing his neck. 

He turned his hand when he reached Sawamura's navel and didn't even pretend to pause before pushing his way under his sweatpants. Sawamura responded with a groan and arch of his hips, pushing up into Suga’s touch.

It made it easier to find his cock. 

Suga wasn't sure who moaned louder as he wrapped his hand around it, himself or Sawamura. 

It was thick and heavy in his hand and Suga could feel a vein pressing against his palm. He stroked up the shaft until he reached the equally thick head, then smeared the generous amount of precum he found over his fingers before sliding them back down to the base. 

Sawamura groaned something in a language Suga didn't know, but he didn't need to understand the words to know what it was. It was universal. A pleased swear. 

Sawamura panted against Suga’s neck as he slowly stroked him. He was just trying to map it out in his head, memorize the weight of it and how his fingertips barely touched around it. He was trying to picture it in his mind's eye. 

Then he suddenly realized he didn't have to imagine it. 

Suga pulled back enough to look down between their bodies and tried to kick the blanket away. It didn't work, it moved anyways as Sawamura pushed it aside. 

There just enough light in the room to see the thick cock in his hand as he pulled it from the sweatpants. The head was shiny and dark, while the shaft had visible veins, and it seemed to bulge even more as it disappeared into dark coarse curls. 

Suga wanted to take a picture of it and share it with the world, because everyone who enjoyed cocks deserved to marvel at it but mostly he wanted to wrap his lips around it. 

Sawamura clearly had other plans as he tugged Suga’s briefs down to his thighs. Suga had no time to question it as Sawamura tugged him back against his chest and wrapped his hand around both their cocks. 

Suga could do nothing more but roll his head back and moan out, “Fuck, Daichi…”

His cock felt perfect sliding against Sawamura's, encased in a warm, rough hand. He was leaking precum and his entire body shivered when Sawamura swiped his thumb over his head to smear it around. 

He was barely being touched and he wasn't going to last. He could feel it building, in his belly and balls and his weak little rocks up into Sawamura's hand were starting to stutter. 

It was so good. So prefect. 

“Daichi, please, I'm gonna..” 

He couldn't even speak, he just wanted more. He wanted to feel Sawamura's cum on his cock, to be covered in him in such a filthy way. He wanted Sawamura over him, pinning him to the bed and kissing him senseless. 

He wanted. 

“Cum for me, Koushi. Let me take care of you.”

Pleasure pulsed through Suga and everything went black. There was only ecstasy. Pleasure. Good. Sawamura Daichi.

As it began to fade and the world began to come back, hazy and foggy, he realized little kisses were being dotted around his face. 

He gave a pleased little hum and cracked open his eyes. 

Daichi was smiling down at him. 

“Beautiful,” the spirit whispered, moving to cup Suga’s cheek, lightly rub his thumb there. 

Suga leaned into the touch and closed his eyes, not able to stop a sassy but slurred “Not bad yourself.”

There was a little huff of amusement, then lips pressed against his forehead. Warmth blossomed through Suga and he felt himself melt more into the bed if possible. 

“That's cheating,” Suga mumbled. He didn't need magic to help lull him into sleep. The intense orgasm combined with the hot cocoa was more than enough.

“I did nothing,” Daichi whispered against his temple. He felt vague shuffling before more warmth enveloped him. The blankets had been placed over him again. 

A content little sigh fell from his lips and Suga curled against the spirit in front of him. 

“Stay here with me.”

“I would not dream of leaving. Now, sleep, my Human. I will be here when you wake.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if it isn't clear by now, the show they are watching is [Bell, Book, and Candle by Skittidyne](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3766450/chapters/8366794) . Go check it out and imagine Suga and Dai giving a full commentary Mystery Science Theatre style.


	12. White Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just let it be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _(:3 」∠)_

He had forgotten how satisfying it was to wake up to someone holding him. 

At some point during the night he had kicked off the blankets, but the arm wrapped loosely around his middle had kept him more than warm enough. 

Suga hadn't felt so content and relaxed in such a long time. He wanted to close his eyes and enjoy his pleasant, sleepy daze and doze in sunlight and warmth until he was ready to get up, but the being holding him seemed to have a different idea on how to spend the morning. Lips brushed over Suga’s hair, tentative and soft, like they were trying to gauge if it was an acceptable act. 

Suga answered the hesitant question by tilting his head up, his lips finding Daichi's. 

The kiss was slow and languid, perfect for an early morning. The arm around his waist ghosted up his side, his back, until the hand could loosely tangle into his hair. A pleased little sigh left his lips as Suga melted into the kiss. 

Heat and want stirred in his belly. He couldn't help it; he had a thing for having his hair pulled and Daichi's fingers kept getting caught on his knots, giving the softest little tugs when they broke free. He didn't want to get worked up though, not when everything was so soft and sleepy and nice. 

He broke the kiss, pulling back just enough to look up at Daichi through his lashes. He seemed relaxed, happy, and Suga was a hundred percent sure the spirit was literally glowing. It made him smile. 

“Good morning,” Suga whispered, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice. 

“Good morning,” Daichi replied, his voice gruff with sleep. It sent a pleasant tingle down Suga’s spine. The feeling intensified as the spirit leaned forward to press their foreheads together. “Did you sleep well?”

Suga gave an affirmative hum, then asked, “You?”

“I did. I cannot remember the last time I slept as a Human.”

He didn't quite know how to react to that, beyond knowing he was glad Daichi had slept. So he stated as such, “I'm glad.”

An easy silence fell between them and Suga found himself starting to relax back into sleep. He was warm and heavy in such a pleasant way. How could he not be? He was being held against a hot, muscular spirit who had given him a very satisfying orgasm the night before, who had vowed to take care of him, and was lightly running his fingers through Suga's silver locks. 

His eyelids felt like they had little weights pulling them down and he knew that soon he'd be drifting off. 

The pending rest was broken by Daichi bumping his nose against Suga’s forehead and barely whispering against him, “Koushi…”

Suga gave the tiniest shake of his head. He knew what was coming. He went from terrified and uncomfortable with Daichi to having a romp with him and it probably required explanation or some form of talking and- if Suga were perfectly honest- he didn't want to do either of those things. Because he didn't have answers. He had just done it and he did not regret it in the least. 

“Just let it be,” he whispered back, “Don't...I just want it to be. Thinking ruins things.”

He felt more than heard Daichi hum against his forehead, then lips were moving down, brushing between his brows down to his nose. Suga tilted his head up, pressing his lips against Daichi's. The spirit gave a groan of approval and pulled Suga closer; not deepening the kiss but making it feel vastly more passionate. Suga curled his fingers against Daichi's chest as he melted against him once again. 

The hand not tangled in his hair began to trace down his side, feather light touches until it could follow along his hip to rest on the small of his back. Suga moaned in pleasure as the hand pushed him closer just as Daichi tugged at his bottom lip with his teeth. He gave into the motion easily, parting his lips while the spirit ran his tongue over the area he had nipped at. 

Before Suga could invite the teasing tongue into his mouth, Daichi pulled back enough to look down at Suga. Suga pouted up at him. He wanted to kiss more. 

“I was going to say...you should not fall back asleep- you have a lot of work to do on your novel still.”

Suga pouted more. He'd much rather talk about his feelings than think about how much editing he had left. 

But Daichi had a point. 

An annoyingly responsible point. 

“Fine, but I'm having breakfast first. And a shower.”

Daichi smiled down at him and Suga felt his heart stutter. It was so soft and full of affection- affection for him- and Suga was sure his cheeks were pink with how warm they were getting. 

“Shower and breakfast first, then you work on your book.”

Suga huffed and pushed forward to press his face against Daichi's neck, “Five more minutes.”

“Five more minutes,” the spirit agreed, amusement in his voice. He began to thread his fingers through Suga's hair again and, after a few moments, the weights of sleep reappeared on Suga’s eyelids.

+++

  


“I don't think we are going to have enough food for both of us to have breakfast and dinner,” Suga commented as he eyed the contents of the refrigerator. He was painfully low on groceries; eggs, chilis, bread, and rice were all he had that was edible. He hadn't put the chicken into the freezer and there was an unpleasant smell coming from it. He was not going to risk eating it. He would need to go shopping...which was a little difficult given the fact he couldn't leave the Cabin.

He would have to call on Yuuji. 

He didn't want to do that. He didn't want to inconvenience the man and he sure as hell didn't want to have him come into the Forest after learning what lurked in the shadows of the trees. He'd have to figure something else out. 

“If you make a list of what you would like, I can have Tanaka go into town to shop for you.”

Suga blinked at the offer and turned to look up at Daichi. He hadn't even considered asking Daichi to go shopping for him. It made sense, but it also seemed a little rude to him. It would be better than asking Yuuji, though. And even a little more rude to ask Daichi's friend.

“He would not mind?” he asked, wanting to make sure. 

Daichi shook his head, “he’d enjoy it. He could go into the store with purpose and not to just look around.”

It still seemed rude to him, asking someone to go shopping for him, but if it wouldn't be as inconvenience, he supposed it would be okay. 

“Which one is Tanaka again?” 

Daichi gave a huff of laughter, “the loud one.”

Suga licked his lips, thinking he should accept the offer. They needed food and it seemed like a win-win situation. 

“I'll make him a list and I can give him some extra money, so he can buy himself some things.”

“He would enjoy that.”

Suga nodded, telling himself he'd actually plan out a few meals before making the list. But before he could do that, there was a more urgent matter at hand. 

“What are we going to eat now, though?” 

He looked over the meager amount of food they had before grabbing the eggs, chili, and bread. “We'll have this breakfast I learned about in America. It’s toast with a fried egg in it and fried chilis because everything's better with chili.”

Daichi looked over the ingredients Suga pulled out, then over to the range. “How can I help?”

Suga eyed the spirit, thinking over how to best utilize him. Daichi had admitted to having very little cooking skills and Suga wasn't sure how adjusted to his human body he was, so he wanted to give him a something simple to do. “Get a cup and use it to cut out circles in the middle of the bread. You can just press the opening of the cup into the bread and it makes a perfect little circle.”

Daichi listened with a little look of concentration on his face before nodding and moving to follow the directions. Suga knew the concept of it seemed strange enough, but he had seen it done before for other types of dishes. 

While the spirit cut little circles out of bread, he focused on cleaning and dicing the chiles. As he worked, he began to think of what type of meals they would be having over the next few days and what they would need for each. His meals thus far had been pretty simple, and what he had shared with Dai had gone over well, so he was pretty sure he'd just repeat what he had already done. 

It made things simple and Suga feared asking Daichi if he had any requests, because Suga didn't know if he could fulfill them. It was better, and less stressful, to be safe. 

They worked in relative silence, only speaking when Suga gave direction to Daichi and Daichi confirmed he understood. Daichi learned how to use the coffee machine while Suga cooked their eggs in a basket and, after a short pass of time, they had a passable breakfast. Not wanting to be too formal and stuffy, they moved their meal into the living room to eat. 

“Do you have a plan for your editing today?” Daichi asked as he began to cut into his food. 

Suga eyed the way the spirit awkwardly held his utensils- probably still not yet used to using his hands- before starting to cut up his own food, “There's a vague outline in my mind of what needs to be done and I have a hard outline of what needs to be done by when so I try to mash those two together and pray for the best.”

Daichi gave a hum of acknowledgement between bites of his food. Suga knew he didn't make the most sense, he just knew what he needed to get done. 

“So, you are going to be working most of the day on that?” 

Suga nodded before shoving toast into his mouth in a very unglamorous fashion. He needed to do quite a bit of editing to get back on his hard schedule, but he was almost caught up. If he was able to work like he planned to over the next few days, he'd actually be able to finish early. 

Barring some supernatural force didn't intervene. 

“I am going to speak with the Trees today, then. I will ask Asahi to watch over you while I am gone.”

Suga frowned at the statement, not exactly sure how to take it. He wanted Daichi to go off and talk to the Trees, but he had not taken into account the spirit would actually have to leave to do that. He was also not sure he how felt about somebody else watching him. Yes, it was nice to have Daichi there to keep him from being sirened back into the Forest by otherworldly flowers, but he didn't need a babysitter, and he especially did not need a babysitter he wouldn't be comfortable around. He was only just barely comfortable around Daichi, and that was after a make out session. 

He knew who Asahi was; the larger of the two crows and a shifter. At least, Suga was pretty sure he was a shifter if the other one was. 

But he had never really interacted with the crows after learning the truth and he wasn't sure if he really wanted to. He was okay in his little safe bubble; he had learned the supernatural was real, that there were different realms, and magic was a thing and despite his initial freak out, he thought he was handling things pretty well. But interaction with another shifter, immersing himself even more into the Forest?” That was a little scary. 

Daichi seemed to sense his hesitation and offered, “He will not come inside if you do not want him to. He can perch up in a tree and keep on eye on things.” 

Suga thought over the option. It seemed rude to just leave Asahi outside, especially when Tanaka was going to be kind enough to go into town for him. He didn't want to be rude. 

“He can come in. I'm just… going to be working so I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to entertain or talk with him.”

Daichi shook his head, setting his utensils down as he did and leaning forward to rest his forearms against the table. “Koushi, you are not expected to play host to us.”

A shiver went up Suga's spine at the use of his given name, but it didn't deter him from pouting at the spirit across from him. “No, but I don't want you or him just sitting there watching me.”

Daichi looked over, as if he were assessing his points, before leaning back and dropping his hands to his lap. “I can understand that, I suppose. I am sure Asahi can find a way to entertain himself.”

Suga’s pout lessened and he found himself nodding, “Alright. Then he can come in.”

Daichi's lips turned up into a smile, one that Suga was sure was meant to be reassuring, but just made his heart pound. 

Daichi looked good with a smile. Friendly, approachable, and Suga wondered for a moment why he had been so afraid of that face. Then he remembered that face could change, grow a snout and fangs longer than his fingers, and behind that gorgeously sculpted body, there was a heart of a literal beast.

Or spirit. 

Suga wasn't sure Daichi would like being called a beast.

He had the heart of a Guardian.

“Have you thought about what you want Tanaka to get from the store?” said Guardian asked, pulling Suga’s thoughts away from mental philosophical debates and back into reality. 

“I did,” Suga replied, forcing his eyes down to his food to pretend to focus on cutting his chili. “I just have to write it down and find where I stored my cash. My bank card would be easier, but they might get suspicious if they see my name on it.”

Daichi hummed in acknowledgment and Suga wondered if he understood what card versus cash meant, but didn't push the issue. “While you write the list, I can do the dishes. That way you have no excuse to be distracted.”

“Oh, I'll find something,” Suga countered with a smirk. He earned a huff of laughter and a shake of the head. A smile worked its way to his face. 

He liked this, sharing a meal with Daichi. It wasn't nearly as awkward as he thought it would be- especially after rolling in the sheets together. It was causal, normal, and didn't feel like just outside the windows there were man eating monsters. 

The rest of the small meal was spent discussing food. Suga thought it would stress him out, for expectations of what he should cook, but it turned out Daichi, just in fact, liked food.

“Before, I was living off energy and the occasional animal carcass. Having a variety is exciting. I think I am going to end up gaining a lot of weight.”

It left Suga a little less stressed as he moved to write out the shopping list, knowing the spirit would eat whatever was put in front of him. He made the list as precise as he could, giving exact quantities of things so Tanaka would not have to sit there and guess, and at the end of it he added ‘ _and something for you and Asahi to enjoy!_ ’ with a poorly drawn smiley face.

He folded the list with care before going to search his suitcase for his ‘just-in-case’ cash. It was nearly tucked away in a pair of socks, like it always was when he traveled. It was a horrible little cliche, but sometimes it was best to not mess with the classics. 

By the time Suga counted out the money Tanaka would need and returned to the living room, Daichi was done with the dishes. 

“Tanaka and Asahi agreed to help out,” the spirit stated, nodding his head towards the window. The two crows were perched on the railing of the deck, the smaller hopping from foot to foot in excitement. Suga tentatively held his hand up in a greeting, smiling a little when the pair flapped their wings in return. 

“I asked them to stay in that form for now. I thought, otherwise, it might be too overwhelming for you.”

“Thank you,” Suga said with almost a sigh of relief. He hadn't even really thought about how he would have handled meeting Tanaka and Asahi in their human forms. 

Suga handed the money and the list over to Daichi, a little frown coming to his lips as he realized he had forgotten a crucial element; “How long will you be gone?”

The spirit shrugged, “hopefully only as long as it takes Tanaka to shop. Unless, of course, the Trees start to bicker among themselves. But I do not think it will take that long; they tend to be pretty straight forward.”

Suga was surprised by that. He pictured such old beings as Trees to be rambly and have no sense of time. But it meant that Daichi would be back sooner rather than later, and Suga was perfectly happy with that. 

“If I do not think I will be back before sundown, I will let you know,” Daichi said, drawing Suga out of his thoughts. The spirit was looking him over and Suga was about to ask who would come tell him if Daichi would be gone after sundown when he stepped forward. Suga’s heart pounded in his chest as Daichi reached up and cupped his cheek while leaning in and pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

Warmth burst from where Daichi's lips met his skin, splitting and darting towards both of his temples, circling around his head like a crown before meeting once again at the base of his skull. The warmth went down his neck in a single wave before splitting again at his shoulders, tingling shooting down his spine and arms, dissolving into nothingness as it reached the small of his back and tips of his fingers. 

It all happened in a moment- it was over before Suga could process what was happening, before Daichi even pulled his lips away. 

“What?” Suga breathed out, looking at the spirit as he stepped back. The warmth was gone as quick as it had come, but he had felt it and he knew it wasn't a normal reaction to a kiss- even if his heart was pounding. “What was that?”

“A kiss?”

“I know that. The..” Suga didn't know how to describe what he had felt, so he made a popping motion with his fingers to try to convey his meaning. “The thing from the kiss?”

Daichi eyed Suga a moment, a little frown on his face. “You felt that?”

“Yes!”

“It was… well wishes? Not a spell; I would not cast something on you without permission. Not even something so small.” Daichi gave a small sheepish smile, “I did not think you would feel it. I am sorry.”

Suga shook his head, calming down a little. He hadn't had something cast on him. “If it wasn't a spell, what was it? What are well wishes?”

The spirit licked his lips, taking a moment to think before offering, “A physical representation of my feelings is the best way I can describe it.”

That was something Suga could kind of understand. The warmth had been unexpected and had freaked him out, but it hadn't been unpleasant. 

“I will try to not let it happen again. I was not aware you would feel it. I am sorry,” Daichi said, his voice soft. 

Suga shook his head, “It wasn't… bad. And you didn't mean to, so no need to apologize.” He paused, took a breath, then, “I think I'm going to start working now. There is a lot to do.”

In reality, he didn't want to draw out the awkward moment and he wanted to get over the nerves of Asahi coming to watch him, but needing to work was a convenient excuse. He did have a lot to do.

Daichi thankfully accepted the excuse and moved back towards the kitchen and the door to the deck. Suga hesitated before following him. 

The crows moved down the deck to meet them at the door, the smaller of the two hopping down from the railing to approach them. 

Suga dipped into a bow, saying as he did, “Thank you for doing this favor for me, Tanaka-san.”

Tanaka flapped his wings with a loud caw and Suga got the impression he was being told to not worry about it. As Suga straightened himself back up, Daichi knelt down, handing over the list and the money. Tanaka took a moment to get a good grip on both with his beak before turning and taking off. 

Only when Tanaka was just a speck on the horizon did Daichi look up to Suga, “I hope you are able to get a lot done. I will be back before nightfall.”

Suga nodded, not exactly sure what to say before offering, “Thank you. Be safe?”

Daichi nodded back at Suga before heading towards the ramp leading down to the grass, and disappearing into the trees. 

Suga let out a small sigh, relaxing just a bit and not realizing how much tension he was holding in his shoulders. He just wanted to go inside, make some more coffee, and focus on his writing. 

In front of him, Asahi cawed.

“Oh. I haven't forgotten about you. Come on, then.” 

Suga held open the door so the crow demon could fly through. He circled around the kitchen before going into the main room and landing on the back of the couch.

Suga followed him after a moment, stopping in the kitchen to make another pot of coffee. 

“I'm going to be working on my novel,” he started as he made his way to the couch. “I have a tablet you can use if you want to watch something or just mess around with it. I also have some books.”

The crow looked him over then settled down, tilting his head. Suga sat to the side of him, not wanting to be rude and block his view. “Daichi told me I don't have to entertain you, but I don't want you to be bored. But, I also kind of don't know what a crow demon would do for fun.” He paused, turning slightly to look over Asahi before hesitantly aking, “You are a crow demon, right? I don't want to use the wrong terminology.”

Asahi nodded, turning as he did to face Suga front on. He ruffled his feathers and Suga thought for a moment he was going to transform into his human form. Instead, his feathers smoothed back down against his body, and as they did, they seemed to part along his forehead. An inky black orb pushed partially from under the feathers, and Suga realized with a sharp breath, as two thin films of clear encased it, that it was an eye. 

Asahi’s feathers smoothed down fully and he tilted his head to the side and blinked all three of his eyes. 

Suga was torn between being completely terrified and completely thrilled. 

So he settled on both, “That's so...I never thought I'd get to see something like that. Wow. Does it stay when you shift?” 

Asahi nodded and Suga tried to picture what a human would look like with three eyes. It had been depicted in shows before, but that was all CGI or special effects. How accurate could that be?

He was tempted to ask Asahi to shift so he could see, but not only would it be rude, but he knew his curiosity would lead him to being overwhelmed. He had to focus. 

“So what do three eyed crow demons do to entertain themselves while I suffer through my editing?” Suga asked, slightly curious but more trying to steer them back in the right direction. 

Asahi’s response was to settle down more into the couch and close the two eyes on either side of his beak. 

Suga huffed, a little smile coming to his face, “That's easy enough.”

A moment passed and Suga quickly realized the crow demon did truly intend to rest while he worked. He gave a soft ‘rest well’ before turning to start his computer. As the machine booted to life, he got up and, as quietly as he could, went to retrieve a fresh cup of coffee. By the time he returned with his treat, everything was ready for him to dive into his work. 

And dive into his work he did. 

Maybe it was from Daichi's well wishes, but Suga was able to completely focus on work and not get distracted by shiny websites and click bait articles. He was able to sit and power through three full chapters before he needed to get up- and that was just to refill his coffee. 

As he waited for the coffee to brew, he turned to look out the window. 

The sky was a bright clear blue but, on the horizon, storm clouds were gathering. They were angry and dark and Suga could see the tops of the trees rustling in the wind that was starting to pick up. It would reach them by dinner time and Suga wondered how long the rains would last. If it kept up for a few days it would probably help keep him from venturing out of the Cabin. 

He turned back to his coffee as he heard the drips starting to slow down and prepared his mug. Once his coffee was ready and poured, he returned to the main room. Asahi was right where he had been left, scrunched up with his beak resting on his chest. Suga debated reaching out and petting down the back of his neck, but they barely knew each other and he wasn't sure Asahi would appreciate it. He didn't even know if crows liked to be pet.

So he kept his hands to himself and sat back down on the couch. 

It was a little harder for him to get back into the groove of things once he had interrupted himself. He was still able to work, but his focus wasn't as intense as it had been. He found his eyes drifting to the corner of the screen, looking for the time. 

He kept wondering how Tanaka was doing- if he understood Suga’s list, if he had finished yet, and, if so, where was he? Suga hadn't even thought about how he was going to carry everything back up to the Cabin and hadn't even considered what would happen if Tanaka was finished shopping before Daichi was done talking to the Trees.

He had assumed that Daichi would take the groceries from Tanaka and bring them up himself. He wasn't prepared to meet Asahi in his human form so he was most definitely not ready to meet Tanaka- especially without Daichi there to be a buffer. 

He felt so negative in his thinking, but he knew what he could and couldn't handle and he couldn't handle rowdy crow demons on his own. 

Suga looked at the clock once more, then told himself he couldn't again until he finished another chapter. 

He did not get the chance to reach that goal. 

As he got to the midway part of the chapter and he finally got back into the groove of things, he heard the door to the deck in the kitchen open. Suga’s heart stopped in his chest until he heard the familiar deep voice call out his name. 

“Koushi?”

“I'm on the couch!” Suga responded, moving to save his document in three different places. As he moved to get up to go into the kitchen, Asahi stirred, waking up and stretching out his wings. Suga offered him a smile before going around the couch to go meet Daichi. 

Luckily, for Suga’s mental health, the spirit was alone and placing bags of groceries onto the counter. Suga could see more bags waiting on the deck, so he quickly went grab them. The storm clouds were rolling in quicker than he expected and he had the slightly irrational fear of his groceries getting washed out. 

“How did it go?” Suga asked as he set down the bags and began to unpack them. 

“Tanaka said he had not had that much fun in a long time. He said he bought meat buns and popsicles for himself and Asahi. I do not know what that means, but he seemed excited,” Daichi responded, a smile coming to his lips as he started to mimic Suga and put the cold groceries away. 

Suga gave a little huff of amusement, but he was glad Tanaka seemed to not only have fun but had followed the list pretty well. Everything Suga had wanted was there, but he hadn't been inquiring about Tanaka. 

“And what about you? How did talking with the Trees go?”

That made Daichi's smile disappear. 

“They did have some answers, but they suggested that a Healer come meet with you to give more definite answers. I agree with them, as I said last night, that Ennoshita would be able to accurately tell you how long you have until you can safely leave the Cabin and answer any questions about bonds.” Daichi turned to face Suga, looking him over like he could feel all the anxiety suddenly emitting from him. “I know you do not wish to interact with anyone else, but I can ensure you meeting Ennoshita would be beneficial. He is very calm and understanding, and he looks very much like a Human, despite also being a crow demon.”

“Does he have a third eye?” Suga asked, his mouth once again working before his brain. Crow demon was the only thing he seemed to be able to latch onto because it seemed like the safest thing. 

He did not want to meet with anyone; especially the magical equivalent to a doctor.

“He does not. Did Asahi show you his?” Suga nodded to the question. 

Daichi looked him over again before walking around the counter, reaching out to cup Suga’s cheek when he was close enough. His palm radiated warmth and Suga found himself leaning into it and closing his eyes. 

“You do not have to meet him tonight. You can have time to prepare, but I would like you to meet with him. He can come here and make sure you are alright,” Daichi whispered, stepping forward until their foreheads touched. “I will be there with you. I would never let him or anyone else harm you, my Human.”

A shiver went down Suga’s spine at the pet name and he was surprised he wasn't bothered by the intimacy of the words or closeness. It actually left him feeling a little warm, a little safe. He believed Daichi's words, that the spirit wouldn't let anyone hurt him, but he still didn't want to meet with the Healer. He, for obvious reasons, did not do well with doctors. 

Suga felt Daichi move his head, then the barest hint of lips brushed over his temples. “Please,” Daichi asked, voice just a breath of a whisper, “just to learn how long you must stay inside.”

Suga frowned. He didn't want to give in, but knowing when he'd actually be able to safely leave the Cabin would be useful and he did want answers. It was frustrating, though, that the Trees did not have them.

“I guess,” Suga finally grumbled. “In the morning. On the deck.” He didn't want his nice retreat to be tainted with doctors more than it needed to be. 

Daichi gave a small huff of a laugh against his temple before pressing a kiss there. “Of course, whatever you wish.”

“And I want another orgasm,” Suga demanded, pushing his luck and being a little bit bratty. If Daichi was being physically affectionate and kissing his hair, more fantastic sex was possibly on the table.

“CAW!”

Suga started, jumping back away from Daichi like he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have. 

Asahi had, at some point, joined them in the kitchen and perched himself on the faucet to the sink. He lowered his head and stared at the two of them with all three of his eyes, unblinking before flapping his wings and cawing again. 

Daichi clearly understood what was said; he gave a snort of laughter and waved a dismissive hand at the crow. “You have heard much worse between Tanaka and Ennoshita. Do not be so prudish.”

Suga glanced to the spirit before looking back to Asahi. “What did he say?”

“That we should let him out before we start acting like deer before the snow.”

Suga snorted in amusement, not having expected such an analogy.

“I apologize, Asahi,” Suga said as he moved to open the door to the deck, “Thank you for staying with me. Please enjoy the treats Tanaka bought.”

Asahi bobbed his head and cawed once more before taking off and flying out the door. As Suga started to close the door, he saw Daichi move out of the corner of his eye. Arms slipped around his waist and Daichi hooked his chin over Suga’s shoulder. It edged on being too intimate, too romantic, but the teasing had relaxed the moment. It felt casual, flirty. 

“Were you able to get work done?” Daichi asked and Suga could hear the smile in his face. 

“I was,” Suga replied, his lips turning up into their own smile. All the distress from the idea of meeting with a healer was slowly ebbing away. “A fair bit more than I thought I would actually get done.”

“Then you have time to take a break,” Daichi hummed, tilting his head to brush his nose along Suga’s throat, sending a shudder down his spine. 

“Oh?” he asked, knowing what was coming and wanting it. It was such a far cry from the interactions they had had only a few days ago, but Suga much preferred it. There was no dread and fear of magic; only a ruggedly handsome Forest Guardian pressing his growing boner against Suga’s ass.

“Yeah,” Daichi said as turned Suga around to face him. “You should relax a little so you do not burn yourself out. That is what you said yesterday.” 

Suga thought, in that moment, that the spirit was going to kiss him. 

He did not. 

Instead, he picked Suga up like he weighed as much as a rag doll and tossed him over his shoulder. Suga shrieked in surprise, clawing at Daichi’s bare back, trying to gain some sort of balance. 

“Daichi!” He tried to sound scolding, but it came out more of a laugh. How could he be angry when he was so overwhelmingly aroused?

“Is this okay? I read it in your book. The pages seemed very well worn,” the spirit said in a serious voice as he began to carry Suga towards the bedroom. Suga could feel something light in his chest, like he was filled with cotton candy, and he realized Daichi was teasing him. 

“Daichi!” Suga repeated, not even trying to hide his laugh now, “Daichi, we didn't finish putting the groceries away!”

The spirit responded by patting the back of Suga’s thigh, “We put the ones that needed to be in the refrigerator away, the rest will be fine. You are the one who asked for another orgasm.”

As they passed through the entrance to the bedroom, Daichi kicked the door shut behind them.

“Just let it be, my Human.”

+++ 

  


The rain was pouring steadily, soaking the earth and bringing out a rich scent of soil and moss that Suga could smell even inside of the Cabin.

The sky was dark and the thunder in the distance promised even heavier storms, but the almost dreary atmosphere only served to relax him more. He had always been told rain washed away negative energy and he was starting to think that maybe it was true. 

Or maybe the anxiety and upset about having to meet with the Healer was overshadowed by the sheer joy he was picking up through his bond. It wasn't his own happiness, he knew that. He was still riding the wave of happiness brought on by multiple orgasms the night before, drawn out from only hands and kisses and growls, but what he was feeling was the emotional equivalent of hearing a favorite song playing in another room. It was a muffled sort of elatedness and he couldn't pinpoint why there was so much of it, but it was so strong he couldn't help but be affected by it. 

Suga turned his gaze from the downpour outside to the scene reflecting in the window beside him. 

Daichi was crouched, going through Suga’s suitcase, looking to see if anything would fit him. The sweatpants he had been wearing had gotten dirty when he had trekked out into the Forest the day before and Suga insisted on washing them. The only problem was Suga also insisted the spirit wear something- there was no way he could concentrate with a naked chiseled Forest Guardian around and Suga wasn't sure if anything else he owned would even fit. 

But Daichi didn't seem to mind. He was smiling as he went through the suitcase, pulling things out and probably silently judging Suga’s wardrobe. 

He looked happy. 

Suga turned around to face him properly as the spirit pulled out a pair of pajama pants patterned with bats that Suga had forgotten he had even packed. 

“These might fit,” Daichi declared, giving them a firm wave to completely unfurl them, “Though they are a little…” He trailed off, glancing to Suga with raised eyebrows. 

The silver haired man huffed and took a few steps toward Daichi, “Don't tease. They were a gift from my mom. She doesn't understand my interest in horror, but she tries.”

Daichi stood and pulled the pajamas on. They fit, but were a little short. He and Suga were roughly the same height, but the fabric needed to stretch around Daichi's ass and thigh muscles where it would hang loosely on Suga. 

Not that Suga would be complaining in the least if Daichi's ankles showed a little bit. 

“I do have my own clothing,” Daichi commented as he tied the drawstrings of the pajamas. “They are just… not here. When the bank took the house, I moved my Human possessions into Asahi and Tanaka’s realm for safe keeping. I did not need them at the time, but perhaps I shall ask them to bring a few sets of clothes so I do not have to keep borrowing yours.”

“I don't mind,” Suga replied, eyes dancing over Daichi's chest and looking at the scars that shined through his body hair. “I just regret not having pajamas that have little paw prints all over them.”

“Little paw prints?” Daichi repeated, not getting the joke at first. It took him a moment, then it dawned on him and he ducked his head with a chuckle. “Clever.”

“I try to be.” 

Daichi shook his head, a burst of fondness coming through the bond that was so strong it almost outshined the joy, before moving to be in front of Suga, his hands reaching out to settle on his hips. 

“Are you ready to go meet Ennoshita?” the spirit asked, pushing his thumbs up under Suga’s shirt and starting to rub little circles that were probably meant to be soothing. 

It did nothing to help the spike of anxiety. 

“I was, until you mentioned it. Do I really need to go?”

“You told me last night that if you ask that I need to say ‘yes’,” Daichi responded, trying to hide a little amused smile and failing. 

“Can I reschedule?” Suga tried, hoping the answer would be what he wanted to hear.

“No, he is waiting on the front porch.” 

Suga’s shoulders slouched and he let out a defeated sigh. He knew Daichi didn't understand his reluctance to meet with the Healer and Suga was not up to explaining why he was dreading it so much. 

He knew the Life was inside of him, not only keeping him alive but keeping him in good health, but there was still that instinctual fear of being told he needed to be whisked away to a hospital. 

A hand traced up his side, brushing up his chest and over his heart, before going up his neck and cupping his jaw. Suga pushed into the touch, still surprised how much warmth radiated from Daichi, and closed his eyes. 

“If you are good for me and meet with Ennoshita without fuss, I shall give you a reward,” Daichi said, voice low and slightly teasing and totally sending a wanting little shiver up Suga’s spine. 

“I do like rewards,” Suga mumbled, mind spinning at what Daichi could possibly be thinking of. He really did hope it involved one of them on their knees. 

The spirit pressed his lips against Suga’s temple and Suga’s heart fluttered. He thought about how he had completely changed his perspective about what was happening to him. 

He had started in the Cabin focused on work and enjoying the company of a dog he had found. Then it had gone to terror and being sick and magic being real. And, now, he wanted to make out with the man who could turn into a dog and every part of his mind told him to take his own advice and just go with things because if he tried to think about it he'd give himself a complex. 

Daichi stepped away, dropping his hand, and Suga just barely stopped himself from giving a displeased whine. 

“Let us go and meet with Ennoshita. Hear what he has to say and then you can get your reward.”

Suga nodded, opening his eyes with a little sigh. Anxiety was still worming through him and he knew nothing Daichi did would fully quell it, but grabbing onto his hand helped a little bit. It was a calming anchor that forced his feet to actually start moving. 

The walk to the front door felt like it was a kilometer, time dragging on forever, instead of the minute walk it really was. All the sound around him quieted into just the pounding of his heart, loud and rapid in his ears, and he felt like the world was wobbling side to side just a little bit. 

When they finally, finally reached the front door, Daichi turned to face him, squeezing Suga’s hand as he did. “It will be okay, my Human,” he said, his voice sounding so far away. 

Suga responded with a nod, not able to do much else, his tongue feeling heavy and like cotton in his mouth. 

Daichi offered a small smile and a light burst of affection rippled through their bond. It made him realize that his anxiety had overshadowed the joy that previously had been coming through their connection. It was like all the happiness had been left back in the bedroom. 

Daichi squeezed his hand before not wasting any time and pulling open the front door. 

The roaring of the rain hit him first, yanking him out of his anxious daze. His senses came rushing back- the smell of the wet earth and the dampness in the air mildly overwhelming- and he did not even process the man standing by the steps until Daichi spoke to him. 

“I hope we did not keep you waiting long, Ennoshita.”

“Not at all; I was enjoying the rain,” Ennoshita replied, turning to face them and no longer blending into the shadows. 

He was exactly and nothing at all like Suga expected a crow demon healer to look like. 

He looked about the same age as Suga, but he was probably so much older than that, with friendly but sleepy eyes, outlined with thick dark eyeliner. He had black hair that reminded Suga of an accountant- save the fact it had black feathers blended throughout it. His outfit was closer to what Suga would have imagined; a black, weathered yukata with an open chest and chunky wooden sandals. 

Daichi was right- Ennoshita did look Human. But it was like he was looking at a Human but that there was something ominous and dark just in his peripheral vision that he couldn't seem to look at head on. There was just something off about him, beyond the feathers in his hair. 

“There's no need to be scared of me, Sugawara-san. I won't take more than ten minutes of your time,” Ennoshita said, bowing just a little bit. “I realize you are uncomfortable with many aspects of this, so it will be quick.”

A little bit of guilt coursed through Suga; he didn't want to be rude, but he was glad Ennoshita understood his anxiety could not handle too much. 

Suga dipped into his own bow, “Thank you for your consideration, Ennoshita-san.”

“Of course. Now, please come stand towards the center of the porch. I don't want to pick up any interference from Sawamura-san.”

Suga glanced back to Daichi, seeking confirmation that everything was alright, and only once he received it did he move to stand where directed. 

Ennoshita offered a small smile before raising his hand up, palm facing Suga. “Try to stay still,” he said as inky black wisps began to extend from his fingers. Suga flinched away, unable to help it, but the wisps didn't move towards him. Instead they swirled together in front of Ennoshita's hand, making a large flat circle. Suga watched with half fear and half fascination as the wisps rotated and symbols began to appear in negative spaces in the circle, like someone was writing them in with a wet paintbrush. 

Suga glanced to Daichi, needing reassurance as he stood there, being examined. At some point, he had moved to lean against the door frame and cross his arms over his chest. He looked so casual and so relaxed that Suga couldn't help but relax a little as well when Daichi shot him a small smile. 

Suga turned his attention back to Ennoshita, inhaling a little harshly when the Healer raised his other hand up. The tips of his fingers had turned black, like he dipped them in ink, and had extended and sharpened into claws. Instead of slashing at Suga like he half-feared, Ennoshita cast his hand out to the side and began using his index finger to write in the air. Wispy smoke came out of his finger and stayed floating where he left it. The symbols looked like they belonged in the same family as what appeared on the smoke disc and Suga wished he understood what they said. 

He had always hated doctors writing notes about him and not knowing what they read. 

He tried to not count the minutes as Ennoshita used magic to look him over. He tried to not fidget, ask questions or start to just ramble. He didn't like the silence, with just the backdrop of the pouring rain, but he didn't know what he could possibly say. 

Before Suga could figure out a way to start a conversation that wasn't completely awkward, Ennoshita dropped his hands and the smoky wisps disappeared. 

“Sawamura-san gave me a few things to look out for. I'm glad to say you're recovering well. Your Life has almost completely stabilized and your heart is healing. By the time this storm has passed, you'll be able to go down to town without any problem.”

Relief washed through Suga; he was caged by the rain, but once it had passed, he could get out of the Cabin and not feel trapped.

Well, except for the flowers. 

“What about the bonds,” he asked, gesturing out to the forest. “And whatever pulled me towards the flowers?”

Ennoshita gave a soft hum, looking between Suga and Daichi, “Yes, I was made aware of that situation. There's nothing to be too worried over. The bond between the two of you is strong. As I understand it, you were near Death when you were given Life- specifically Life from one of our Guardians, who is not well versed in transferring Life. You are able to feel his intense bond with the Forest, though more of a shadow of it. The Forest cried out for help, and you were compelled to respond. By helping, giving the flowers Life, you created your own bond with the Forest.” 

Suga nodded, understanding what was being said. It went with what Daichi had told him before and built off of it in such a way out kind of made sense. In a ‘magic is real ‘ kind of way. 

“And what if they call again? What if they need help?”

Daichi stepped forward, moving to stand beside Suga, “If it is just an echo of my Guardian bond, there should be no problem, correct?” The spirit looked to Ennoshita, “the Forest rarely calls out.”

The Healer nodded, “I agree. You wouldn't have to worry about it happening again.”

Suga looked between them, a little skeptical but feeling slightly better. “So there is nothing that can lure me into the Forest and trick me into giving up Life?”

Daichi shrugged, tilting his head a little to look at him, “there is a type of siren, but he knows better than to go near you and he's restricted to water.”

A flash of red hair came to Suga’s mind and he quickly pushed it away. He didn't want to know. 

Another question occurred to him, something a little more dark that made dread fill his belly, but it wasn't something he could ignore.

“Once the Life… heals me and I can leave the Forest, how long will it take to leave my system? How long until I get sick again and it won't start healing me on its own?”

Ennoshita sighed deeply, crossing his arms over his chest. The sleeves of his yukata slid down and Suga noticed for the first time that feathers were going up his forearms, ending at his elbows. They looked sharp, like they could cut something.

“I saw that inside of you- that you are missing most of one of your organs, the one that helps you fight off illness. The Life is acting not only as that organ, but a boosted version. When the Life leaves, your body will go back to being how it was. However, I'm not exactly sure how long it will take for it to fully leave you. It could be weeks. We have never really measured it before.”

“Can we keep it from leaving him? Keep him in good health?” Daichi asked, cutting in before Suga could respond. Suga looked to the spirit, not sure what to say. 

The idea was appealing, but then he'd be linked to the supernatural for the rest of his life and there were so many unknowns- like if he'd be able to travel away from the Forest and how often he'd need to be given Life. 

Those unknowns were not so appealing and were strong enough to make him not want to try. 

“In theory, yes,” Ennoshita said with a shrug. “He has his own Life but your Life, from the Forest, would have to be transferred to him...if it could even last that long away from the Forest. Then there are issues of his body becoming dependant on Life and what would happen if he did not get a transfer on time. I would need to speak with the Trees, but it isn't something I would recommend. The variables are too risky.”

“Is there anything we can do? To keep him in good health?” Daichi asked, moving to place a hand on the small of Suga’s back. It was a protective gesture and Suga leaned back into the touch, feeling safe. 

“If it is something Sugawara-san is interested in, I can look into a few things?” Ennoshita offered.

Suga frowned, thinking it over. Of course he wanted to be able to be magically healthy, to not have to worry about getting ill and ending up in the hospital, but he knew there would be some sort of price to pay. Ancient Forest beings didn't just give out life altering magic. 

“I wouldn't say…no to hearing ideas,” Suga said after a moment. 

Ennoshita nodded, “Then I'll look into a few things. So, after the rain passes, you'll be able to leave as you please. You won't be bound to the Cabin any longer. Do you have any other questions?”

Suga shook his head. He did have questions, but not for Ennoshita. He still had a few unanswered questions for the spirit beside him, but they could wait until later. 

For now, he bowed again. 

“Thank you for coming and… making sure I will be okay. It is reassuring.”

Beside him, he felt Daichi bow. 

“Thank you for checking him. I appreciate it very much.”

As he looked up he saw Ennoshita shaking his head fondly, “It is my job as a Healer and I can't refuse a request from a Guardian. If you need anything more, just call out for me and I will come. Please do not attempt to give any Life without me here.”

Daichi gave a snort of laughter and when Suga looked to him, the spirit had a grin on his face. 

“I will leave the Healing to you. Thank you, Ennoshita.”

The Healer nodded, then turned to walk down the steps, into the downpour. He didn't seem at all bothered by it- in fact Suga noticed he just barely tilted his head up into it. 

Lips brushed over his forehead and Suga tilted his head to look up at Daichi, his attention diverted from the departing Healer. 

“Let's get you out of the rain and give you a reward for doing so well,” Daichi whispered against him. 

Suga gave a small shiver, anticipation gathering in his belly. He wanted to know what was planned for him, what Daichi was going to reward him with. 

Another orgasm? Letting Suga finally get on his knees? Laying Suga out and absolutely wrecking him?

There were so many wonderful options.

He allowed Daichi to lead him back inside and into the kitchen. As they entered the room, Suga saw his reward sitting on the counter and couldn't fight the bubble of laughter that escaped him. 

“When did you go and get this?” He asked, completely delighted as he stepped towards the massive cupcake sitting on the counter. It had a perfect little swirl of chocolate frosting with little gelatin shapes laid so carefully against it. Stars and crescent moons decorated the cupcake and it looked so pretty, Suga didn't want to eat it. 

But he also wanted to just devour it. 

“I asked Tanaka to go get it when you were in the shower. It is infused with the same magic I put into the hot chocolate. I thought you would need something…. pleasant after doing something that made you so anxious.”

Suga turned to face Daichi, smiling so widely his cheeks hurt. “You are sweet. How did you know I would behave?”

Daichi shrugged in response, reaching up to rub at the back of his head, “I did not, but if you were unruly it was to be an apology for having upset you.”

Suga gave a pleased little laugh and stepped forward, reaching up to cup Daichi's jaw with both hands. “You're so sweet,” he repeated, pecking Daichi on the lips. “Thank you.” 

He kissed the spirit a little more firmly, melting against his strong chest while one arm wrapped around his waist and the other moved to tangle its hand in Suga’s hair. It was easy to lose himself in kissing Daichi; slow and languid and natural. It was almost disappointing when the kiss broke and Daichi rested his forehead against Suga’s.

“I think I like that kind of reward better,” Suga hummed, a teasing little smile coming to his lips. “I think it's a little more motivating, but I'm so looking forward to that cupcake. It wasn't what I expected but it's what I want.”

Daichi huffed, his lips turning up into their own little smile, “What kind of reward were you expecting? For me to bend you over the countertop finally?”

Suga squirmed in Daichi's hold, because that was exactly what he wanted. But he didn't want to admit it outright. “Maybe.”

Daichi gave another huff of laughter before pressing his lips to Suga’s in a quick kiss, “Hmmmm, well, then, I would like to propose something to you. To help motivate you.”

“Oh?”

“For every chapter you finish working on in your project, I will give you the type of reward you enjoy. That is not a cupcake.”

Suga had to keep himself from moaning; Daichi's idea sounded like Heaven and it would keep him nice and motivated. 

“Can we start right away?”

Daichi pulled back enough to shake his head without bumping his nose against Suga’s, “No. For now I would like for you to enjoy your hard earned reward and relax. But, after, I would very much like to help you finish your novel.”

Suga gave a little dramatic sigh, but it was offset with how much he was smiling. “I guess we could do that.”

Daichi's hand untangled from Suga’s locks and smoothed down his back, before both of his arms dropped to his side. His smile softened a little and his eyes, still bright like amber glowing by a fire, danced over Suga’s face. Warmth and affection tickled at their bond and Suga had to look away. The emotions were almost too serious, too overwhelming. 

His uncomfortableness must have come across their connection, because Daich took a step back from him, “I would like to watch the show about the ocean while you enjoy your reward. Perhaps lay blankets by the fireplace, enjoy the warmth and rain.”

That sounded more casual, easy. Suga nodded, eyes darting back up to look at Daichi.

“That sounds nice.”

Daichi's smile grew again. “I shall go get the thick blankets to lay in front of the fire.” Suga nodded again, acknowledging his words as Daichi turned and left the kitchen. 

Suga watched him, admiring how strong his shoulders looked, how easy it would be for the spirit to pick him up and take him against a wall. 

It was easier for him to think about sex rather than the emotions and how sweet Daichi was being to him. It wasn't as frightening, because Suga in no shape or form wanted to think about emotions.

But he did want to think about some sweet things.

He turned and dug his finger into the frosting of the cupcake, scooping up one of the gelatin stars, and shoved it into his mouth. It was a rich, deep chocolate that wasn't too heavy, and when he bit into the gelatin, there was a burst of coffee. 

Warmth spread through him as he swallowed and he knew he was smiling again. He knew there was magic infused into the cupcake, but it was almost like out didn't need it. It was delicious enough on its own to be relaxing.

Suga moved to grab a fork, telling himself he needed to be somewhat civilized and not cram the entire cupcake into his mouth, before taking his treat and going out into the main room. 

Daichi was laying down the blankets as Suga came in. The fire was already crackling, from magic Suga had to guess- there had been no logs ready to use. He waited until the spirit was done straightening things before plopping down right in front of the fire, then turned to look at his laptop that was on the coffee table. 

Daichi followed his line of sight, then shook his head fondly and moved to go get the device. Once he had it, he brought it over and settled behind Suga, and hooked his chin over the silver haired man’s shoulder as Suga brought up the correct site. 

“The good thing about these types of shows are that you can fall asleep and when you come back to it, you're not lost as to what is happening,” Suga said as he started up where they had left off.

“Are you going to fall asleep on me?” Daichi asked, tilting his head a little to press a kiss to Suga’s neck. It was gentle and sweet and not at all too much. 

“I might,” Suga replied, free hand reaching to find Daichi's wrist and tug it so strong arms were wrapped around his middle as the documentary began to play. “You gave me a magic relaxing cupcake, afterall.”

“That I did, my Human. That I did.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Mora for putting up with my shit for 5 months. Also I got a new job and Big Changes so that threw me off so I'm back to hopefully back to having a good (?) schedule


	13. Mallow Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hunger turned into surprise and confusion, Daichi’s brows knitting together before mouthing back at Suga, “Calm my dick?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so p important note to start off with:
> 
> This chapter would not be possible without [ MoraMew](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoraMew/pseuds/MoraMew) . All that Good Dicking down there, they wrote. From "Or, maybe it wasn’t a bad thing that Daichi didn’t follow." to the scene break is All Them. It was originally supposed to be ghost writing and all that but no it All Deserves Credit. All I did was supply vague notions of dick appreciation (I have a lot of opinions about Daichi's Dick)
> 
> So please, if you like the below, go read their other works and comment and lay down face first into bed like I did. Because I can't write sexy things to save my life.
> 
> Mora is truly a blessing.

Suga had never considered himself to be a smart man. He could be clever- always on instinct and never when he meant to be- but he was nowhere near smart.

A smart man would have refused Daichi’s proposal of rewards for finishing editing a chapter.

Suga had not only foolishly accepted the offer, but had accepted the offer without checking what chapter he would be editing next. His idiocy had left him editing not only the second longest chapter in his book at fifteen pages, but also the chapter he had put off actually writing. Most of the chapter was a series of parenthesis with fun descriptions such as ‘insert gory scene’ or ‘describe creepy body movements’.

His past self was absolutely no help, he decided.

Suga was burning to know what Daichi’s reward would be; it promised to be more than a cupcake and most likely some sort of sweet kiss. But it felt like he would never get to find out. After a nice, though admittedly late, breakfast, he had sat down to work on his novel.

It was past nightfall and he still had three pages to finish. His manuscript was open not only on his laptop, but his tablet and phone as well, so he could look back at what he had already written as well as have his notes about his timeline easily accessible.

Continuity was a pain in the ass.

He had written a new paragraph about a character to only find out a page later he had already killed them off and things were such a mess and, really, as the author he should have known what was happening in his own story, but half the time he was completely lost. How people wrote stories before the invention of the computer was beyond him. He’d never get anything done if he had physical notes and had to actually sit down and look things up in books.

Not that he was getting much done in the first place.

He was never going to find out what Daichi had planned for him. 

“Can I have a hint?” he asked for what had to be the fortieth time that day.

Daichi looked up from where he was sweeping up the ash from the fireplace. The spirit had been cleaning all day; he was apparently much neater than Suga had expected. 

“No. That would ruin the surprise,” he replied, just like he had the other thirty-nine times. “Have you made progress since the last time you asked?”

“I’m done?” Suga lied. He was selfish and wanted his reward and to not deal with his past self’s laziness.  
Daichi fixed him with a look that showed he clearly did not believe Suga in the least. He set the dustpan and brush down on the hearth, then moved to sit behind Suga, arms looping around his middle and chin resting on his shoulder.

“Talk me through what you need to do. Vocalizing helps the thought process.”

Suga wasn’t sure if Daichi knew what he was talking about or not, but it was a kind gesture and leaning back against his sculpted chest helped alleviate the stress building up inside of him. He tilted his head back, letting it rest against Daichi, and closed his eyes as he began to speak.

“Just a few more pages to power through. Everything sucks and I’ve basically written most of the chapter today because past me is a horrible person. There is one more big, blank empty space I need to fill in and checking a few details. There is a research note because I hate myself. It is going to take the rest of the night to finish just a few pages because my focus is gone. All I can think about is your reward- which is the only thing keeping me going. I think I’ll actually die if I don’t get it tonight.”

As Suga finished his rambling, Daichi moved his hands from resting in Suga’s lap to smoothing over his stomach, pulling his shirt up a bit as he did.

“I will not give you a hint, but I will sit here with you until you finish. As motivation.”

Suga huffed, arching his back just a little to push up into the touch, “That’s not motivation; that is a distraction.”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“God, no.”

Daichi’s hand pushed under Suga’s shirt, pressing flat against Suga’s belly, so close to his scar. But Suga didn't think about that, only about how warm the hand was against him, how rough his palms were, and how good it would feel wrapped around different parts of his body. 

He wondered if the spirit would be into choking him. He really hoped so. 

As if Daichi could read his thoughts, he hummed against Suga’s neck, “Focus, Koushi.”

A little shiver went up Suga’s spine at the use of his first name- he didn’t think he’d ever get over that- but he forced himself to look back down a his laptop. The words were all a jumble to him and nothing really made sense, but he reread them over and over until they clicked in his mind and formed a coherent thought. 

Daichi moved with him easily as he hunched back over his keyboard and began to work. 

His concentration wasn’t much better, but the warm presence against his back helped to keep him grounded. Little murmurs against his neck of ‘You’re doing so good’ and ‘Just a little more’ when he paused worked better than any magic Daichi could have used on him to nudge his focus into alignment. 

He wanted his reward.

And he wanted to be one step closer to finishing the first draft of his manuscript, but that came second fiddle.

Time seemed to inch by and it was nearly midnight by the time he got to the last half page. By some miracle, all he had to do was read it over and check for grammatical mistakes and punctuation. As he began to read the last paragraph, the hand that had been idly resting on his stomach began to creep down. It skimmed over his sweatpants and settled over his crotch. As Suga saved the document, Daichi squeezed him through his pants.

“Good, Koushi.” 

Suga moaned, unable to help it, and rolled his head back. Arousal shot through him and whatever reward was to come had better be sexual or Suga was going to spend the next day pouting.

“My reward?” Suga asked, completely not demanding.

“Already waiting for you,” Daichi promised, before quickly adding, “and not a cupcake.”

“Not a cupcake?” Suga repeated, slightly suspicious. 

“Not a cupcake. Something hopefully closer to what you actually are wanting,” Daichi replied, moving his hand from between Suga’s thighs to his side, giving it a squeeze before standing up. “Let me take you to your reward. You worked hard today.”

Suga pushed himself up, following the spirit, “I'm still suspicious that I have to go to my reward.”

A shrug was the response he received but Suga didn’t push. He wanted to trust Daichi with whatever he planned. After all, despite the teasing and complaining, he had really enjoyed the cupcake.

He just wanted something more primal.

The bedroom was dark when they entered it and a part of Suga half expected to be lifted up and pressed into the doorframe or thrown onto the bed. Instead, to his disappointment, he was lead past the bed and into the equally dark bathroom. He couldn’t see anything, save the faint moonlight that came from the frosted window on the other side of the room. 

How could his reward be in a dark bathroom?

His question was answered as Daichi closed the door behind them. 

As soon as the door clicked closed, about a dozen candles that had totally not been in the bathroom earlier that day flickered to life. They lined the vanity, varying in size, and already dripping the wax, looking like they both belonged in an old timey black and white horror movie movie. 

Suga loved them, and the fact they were not the only movie-like thing in the bathroom.

Steam was rising from the bathtub, coming from water that was covered by a thick layer of dark colored flower petals. He guessed they were roses,defaulting to them because he had no idea what else someone would put into a bath. There were marks written, or burned, into the side of the tub, going along its entire length. He recognized none of them, except something that looked like a less than sign from his high school algebra lessons, but he doubted Daichi had magicked mathematics onto his tub.

He hoped Daichi hadn’t magicked mathematics onto his tub. 

He knew it was magic, whatever it all was. Romantic, and wonderful, and full of magic and not his mouth around Daichi’s cock.

Suga looked back at the spirit, who was watching him carefully.

“What is all this? When did you have time to do all this?” Suga asked, because Daichi had been with him for the past who knew how long, holding him while he fought through editing. Suga would have noticed if he had gotten up to draw a bath, especially considering the bath was still giving off heat, steaming up the mirror, and making everything glossy. 

“Part one of your reward. And I did it hours ago- I suppose I am just lucky that you kept using the hall bath instead of coming in here.”

“Part one?” Suga echoed. He hadn’t really expected multiple layers of rewards but he was not going to complain over it. He turned his attention back to the bath, eyes skimming over the rose petals floating on the water, before moving to pull his shirt off. 

He undressed slowly, almost putting on a teasing little show by swaying his hips as he slid out of his pants and underwear. He felt a little ping of Want and Lust through their bond and didn’t try to hide his smirk when he turned to face Daichi. 

The smirk disappeared as soon as he saw that the bastard spirit was naked as well. 

It hadn’t occurred to him at all that Daichi might join him in his relaxing romantic bath and he was wholly unprepared for nude Daichi. Suga had finally gotten used to him being shirtless, with his washboard abs and biceps that put superheros to shame, but he had to prepare himself for the spirit’s thighs and lower half. 

Suga had a thing for happy trails and Daichi definitely did not disappoint on that front, and the spirit’s thighs were as thick as tree trunks and solid muscle, littered with scars that reminded Suga that none of the muscles were just for show. Suga would die happy being crushed by those thighs.

His own legs betrayed him, giving a tremble, and he wondered what would happen if he just dropped to his knees and opened his mouth.

Daichi, probably spurred on by the amount of thirst Suga was most likely projecting, chuckled and stepped forward until he could reach up and cup Suga’s jaw, pulling him into a light kiss. Suga wanted more, but he settled for placing a hand on the spirit’s chest instead.

Daichi traitorously pulled back only after a few moments. 

“In the bathtub before I bend you over the sink,” Daichi ordered, voice lower and a little more gravely than Suga had expected based on the chuckle. 

Maybe the spirit was just was thirsty as he was. 

A snappy comeback only came to mind after Suga had turned to obey. He stored it away, promising himself he’d be a brat later. He wanted to see what Daichi had planned for him. 

The water was the perfect temperature. It was just below scalding- just the way he liked it- and it sent shivers up his spine as he settled himself in. 

Aromas began to drift up, like he had cracked the surface of the water to let them escape, and Suga detected hints of honey and spices and it made the already steamy bathroom a little more heady. 

Daichi stepped into the water behind him and sank down, thick, muscular, perfect legs bracketing around Suga. 

The tub was large, long enough for Suga to stretch out comfortably, but he knew it wasn’t big enough to fit two full grown men and still leave room. 

The writing on the side of the tub must have done more than keep the water hot. 

Arms looped around his waist, gently tugging Suga to lean back against Daichi’s chest, and he went easily. He closed his eyes, enjoying the moment; a perfect bath with an amazingly attractive man-dog-spirit as a pillow. 

Such a reward was much better than a cupcake. 

Daichi began to nose along Suga’s shoulder, lips just barely brushing over his skin. It sent a small shiver up his spine and disgustingly needy little noise escaped his lips. 

Such sweet little teasings drove him mad and made the thirst and the want that was pulling in his belly grow. 

“I might fall asleep,” Suga teased, letting his head fall to one side so Daichi had more room to kiss. Daichi responded with a gentle nip.

“That would ruin my plans.” 

“What are your plans?” 

“A surprise,” Daichi murmured against him, ghosting his lips up to Suga’s neck as he did. “But they require you to relax.”

“If I relax too much, I might fall asleep,” Suga countered. “Or do you want me to relax in a different, kinky way?”

Daichi huffed, hot breath making Suga shiver again, before he laid back in the bath, dragging Suga along with him. The new angle made it awkward for Daichi to get at Suga’s throat, but he didn’t seem to be worried about that at all. 

Strong hands ran from his midsection down to his hips, then spread down his thighs before hooking under them and hauling Suga up. The silver haired man let out an undignified squawk as Daichi moved his legs to be under Suga’s, holding his hips up in the air. He was resting completely against Daichi, laid out and held in such a way that not even his feet were touching the bottom of the tub. It wasn’t completely unpleasant, but it left him feeling very unbalanced.

And feeling like he was about to get fucked in the tub. 

He did not like getting fucked in standing water, especially not water that had things floating in it.

“Daichi!” 

“Relax,” the spirit mumbled into his ear, teasing and far too gruff for Suga’s liking. “I want to be able to see your face the first time I claim you properly. But you need to relax before we can move onto that.”

“Is that your surprise?” Suga asked in a whisper, heart pounding hard in his chest. Being moved so easily combined with Daichi’s words and everything else was getting him worked up- even in an awkward angle- and if Daichi didn’t plan to follow through with his words, Suga was definitely going to cry. 

“Mmmm, I guess I have ruined it now,” Daichi whispered back, returning to nosing at Suga’s neck. 

He melted at the words, tilting his neck to give Daichi even more access to his skin, as awkward as it was. Nosing turned to brushes of lips and scrapes of teeth that had Suga wanting to squirm on top of Daichi. The spirit’s hands, so teasingly slow, moved from where they were settled on his thighs, up his hips and smoothing over his belly. One rested on his scar, keeping him balanced in his awkward position, while the other journeyed back downwards. 

Suga cracked open his eyes just in time to see Daichi’s hand wrap around his half hard cock. 

Another whimpering moan escaped his lips in the form of Daichi’s name.

“Is this okay, my Human?” Daichi asked into his ear, very gently squeezing Suga’s cock. 

All he could do was nod. It was a little overwhelming, being moved so easily and spread out, vulnerable to whatever Daichi planned for him, but it was such a heady feeling, knowing he had the control. Daichi wouldn’t do anything he didn’t want and Suga wanted it all.

Daichi just wanted to take care of him.

Reward him for finishing a chapter.

Lips brushed over his neck before Daichi slowly, loosely began to stroke him. 

It was perfect and teasing and Suga wanted to push his hips up, but he had no leverage. All he could do was lay there and make disgustingly needy little noises. 

It felt like an eon before the grip on his cock got tighter. He could feel the roughness of Daichi’s hands and if made him feel that much impossibly harder.

“Daichi,” he whined. No shame, only need.

“Do you want more, my Human?” Daichi asked in a low growl. 

Suga nodded, almost frantic with it. He didn't just want more. He needed more. 

The pleas that fell from his lips were not even full words; half Daichi’s name and mix of ‘please’ and ‘need’. 

He was moved again, tilted and sprawled across Daichi’s chest at a diagonal. He could finally see the spirit's face, the first time since getting into the bathtub. 

It was raw hunger. 

Raw hunger that Suga didn't feel over their connection until that moment. 

It shook him, amplifying what he already felt. 

He didn’t notice the spirit had moved the hand that was resting on his stomach until it was running down the underside of his thigh until fingers could brush against his hole. Suga’s hips jerked and he didn’t know if he wanted to push up into the hand around his cock or the finger teasing at him. 

He just wanted something. More. He needed more.

Daichi gave him more. 

His hand wrapped around the base of Suga’s cock, firm and almost too tight, just as a finger pushed into him. 

He hadn’t had anything that wasn’t his own inside him in so long that even one finger up to a knuckle was so much. Daichi’s fingers were so much thicker than his own and the stretch was so good. 

A fleeting thought of lube and tearing passed through his mind, but it quickly disappeared as the finger inside of him began to move smoothly. 

Maybe one of the markings on the side of the tub translated into ‘make the water into lube’. He didn’t care. He just cared that Daichi’s finger wasn’t going in deep enough.

He tried to rock his hips, fuck himself back onto the finger, but he had no leverage to move. His hips were partly in the air, one thigh held up by Daichi’s forearm to give better access to his ass, and even when he kicked his feet, he couldn’t find anything to connect to. The best he could do was rock on his shoulders and pray it worked. 

It didn’t, of course. Daichi adjusted the position of the arm wrapped around his cock so that his forearm was pressing on Suga’s hip, keeping it down.

“Be good for me, my Human,” Daichi growled at him, “Relax and I will take care of you.” As he finished his words, he thrust his finger into Suga. He couldn’t help but sob and clench around the finger. 

He wanted more. He wanted so much more.

The hand around his cock finally, finally began to move again as Daichi began to fuck him with his finger. The timing was off, not perfectly synced like in his dirty books, but he didn’t care. It felt so utterly amazing and driving Suga into being a needy mess. 

“Daichi, please, please, fuck, Daichi,” he pleaded, not even sure what he was asking for, but just wanting even more. 

A second finger joined the first inside of him, stretching him even more. The pace of the fingers thrusting in and out of him slowed, letting him adjust to the change. A displeased whine bubbled out of Sugas’s throat and, before it even finished, Daichi reacted. He squeezed around Suga’s cock, then swiped his thumb over the head, smearing beads of precum. 

Arousal shot up his spine at the sensation and he cried out Daichi’s name again.

Lips found his own, silencing his whimpering. The angle was awkward and he was jostled as Daichi hunched to get at him, but he craned his neck to try to make things more comfortable. They were both hungry for each other, biting and licking at each other with no sense of rhythm. They were desperate for each other. 

Daichi's fingers began to spread, stretching him out as they fucked in and out of him. The hand around his cock tightened, focusing on the head, just like the spirit knew he enjoyed. 

His orgasm built quickly, spilling over him before he could try to hold it back. Daichi worked him through it, burying his fingers inside Suga, making him so full, as his belly was covered in cum.

Exhaustion overcame him as he came down from his high and Daichi pulled back from where they had been panting against each other. Suga looked up at him with hazy eyes and he could see the hunger inside of the spirit was still present.

He still had a second part of his reward.

“Are you going to fuck me?” Suga asked with no shame. 

Need flashed through the bond as Daichi crooked his fingers inside of Suga. The moan he responded with was purposefully filthy.

“Not in the tub,” Daichi growled, and as if he was punishing Suga in the not so fun way, slowly removed his fingers from the silver haired writer. It left him feeling so, so empty and Suga almost wanted to ignore the fact they were in standing water and demand Daichi put his cock into him instead.

He did not get the chance to open his mouth to be bratty; Daichi started to move him again. Instincts had him throwing his arms around the spirit’s neck, clinging to him so he wouldn’t fall into the water as Daichi somehow managed to stand up while carrying Suga.

“Oh.” 

He leaned himself into Daichi as the spirit stepped out of the tub. They were dripping water and part of Suga wanted to pause the moment to dry off. He banished the thought when Daichi’s tongue darted out to wet his lips.

He needed Daichi over him and inside him now, dripping water be damned. 

“Bed,” Suga demanded, shaking the arms around Daichi’s neck to make him pay attention even more. “Now.”

Daichi huffed, but there was no sass or comeback. Just need pouring through their bond. Suga wasn’t sure anymore if it was his or Daichi’s.

The spirit carried him into the bedroom with long, quick steps, the door smartly opening without much hassle. 

Much like when they had entered the bathroom, candles Suga knew hadn't existed before flickered to life on the dresser, giving the room a warm glow.

The bed seemed so far away even though it was only a few steps. Suga clawed at Daichi's shoulders until the spirit was setting him down on the bed. It took Suga a moment to detach himself from Daichi and fall back into the blankets. 

He let out a distressed noise when Daichi didn't follow him and pushed himself up on his elbows to look at Daichi. 

Or, maybe it wasn’t a bad thing that Daichi didn’t follow.

Suga swallowed as he looked over the spirit standing beside the bed and bit his lip, eyes slowly roving over him. He hadn’t quite had the chance to just appreciate Daichi yet and, truly, that was a shame.

Because Daichi dearly needed to be appreciated.

It was like Daichi was crafted to hit all his weak spots. There were all the muscles, of course- scarred over abs and thick thighs and biceps that made Suga’s mouth water and his mind wander. To add to the wonder of his supernatural lover, there was the perfect bonus of a thick and glorious happy trail- dark and curly hair leading down in a tantalizing path to a cock that had Suga feeling needy and hungry in a way he hadn’t felt in a long time. A thick cock, oh so slightly curved and flushed in the candlelit- really, it was unfair just how weak looking it over made Suga feel.

Suga swallowed, again, and moved to be near Daichi. He looked at the cock before him and licked his lips without even realizing, eyed it appreciatively without giving notice to his owner.

“What are you doing?” Daichi asked, his hand moving to brush through Suga’s hair.

“Admiring,” Suga told him honestly and without shame, his own hand reaching to palm a heavy sack, smooth up to the thick shaft he wanted to choke himself on. Daichi’s fingers flexed in his hair and Suga glanced up at him, lips twitching into a smile at the vaguely amused look on Daichi’s face. “Has anyone ever told you that you have a magnificent dick?”

Daichi huffed and Suga could almost swear that there was a passing tint of red across Daichi’s cheeks, a pleased but quietly flustered look on the spirit’s face. It was gone almost as soon as it had arrived, though, and Suga’s attention was caught instead by the way Daichi’s free hand found his jawline.

“Has anyone ever told you that you are shameless?” Daichi countered, thumb sliding to press against Suga’s lips.

Suga hummed and nodded, making sure to move so he would not dislodge Daichi’s hand.

“Several times,” Suga murmured to him. Daichi huffed again- more quietly this time- and Suga smiled up at him before kissing at the thumb against his lips, peeking his tongue out to give it a quick lick. “I want to suck you off.”

And this time, Suga could definitely spot that quick flash of red across tan cheeks. Daichi clicked his tongue, but Suga still caught the vaguely flustered look on his face- something a little embarrassed, but also pleased and terribly endearing.

“I would like that sometime, my Human,” Daichi told him, voice low enough to make Suga’s spine tingle. His thumb pressed more firmly against Suga’s lips and Suga opened his mouth to suck on it, look up at Daichi through his lashes. “I imagine your mouth to be sweet. But that is not your reward tonight.”

Suga pouted up at him and twisted his hand over Daichi’s shaft, drew it up and then back down slowly as he let Daichi’s thumb fall from his lips.

“Not even a little?” Suga wheedled, doing his best to sound soft and needy in the way that usually got things going in his favor. “Come on, Daichi…”

He leaned forward to lick over Daichi’s head, but was stopped when fingers curled in his hair and kept him from moving. He let out a whine, but Daichi just shook his head down at him- keeping firm even as his cock twitched in Suga’s hand.

“Koushi,” Daichi said, voice dipping deep and giving the hint of a rumble, a growl, “That is not what I have in store for you.” Suga pouted and Daichi tugged him back almost gently from him- still making Suga bite his lip to keep from moaning at how his hair pulled. “Be good for me.”

Good for him.

Suga squirmed, but he did not fight (much) as Daichi let his hair go, began to push him onto his back. When Suga was against the mattress once again, Daichi moved to join him on the bed and Suga ended up shivering at the way the spirit almost looked a bit predatory as he crawled forward to frame himself over him.

Hunger was a good look on Daichi and Suga couldn’t help falling a little weak underneath it.

It took only a touch for Suga to spread his legs for Daichi- rough fingertips skirting along his thighs and nearly tickling him as they danced up to touch his cock, smooth over it and tease.

“Beautiful,” Daichi murmured, under his breath so quietly Suga almost didn’t catch it. “I like the sight of you underneath me, Koushi.”

Koushi.

Suga shivered and he rocked his hips up against Daichi’s hand, biting his lip but still not managing to hide his moan. He was still sensitive from the bath and the sweet words hit him like a punch, flustered him and brought his need back up higher.

“Is teasing me my reward?” Suga asked, trying to tease a little but undermining himself with the hint of breathlessness in his voice. “I was hoping to have you in me if you weren’t going to let me choke on you.”

Again, that oh so faint tint of red on Daichi’s cheeks and amusement mixed with just a trace of sheepishness on his face. Suga grinned up at him and Daichi huffed, hand smoothing down quickly to push fingers into his hole and bring a gasp from him.

“I will have you, my Human,” Daichi promised, fingers curling inside and drawing out the quietest whimper. “I am going to bring you pleasure again.”

“Then have me,” Suga urged, rolling his hips in an effort to fuck himself on Daichi’s fingers. “Fuck me, Daichi.”

A soft growl escaped Daichi right as Suga angled himself so Daichi’s fingers brushed against his sweet spot. Daichi pulled his fingers out before Suga could take advantage of his new pleasure, though, and Suga found himself pouting up at him, barely holding back a whine.

“I will, my Human,” Daichi promised, one hand creeping up Suga’s chest to firmly push him back against the bed. “I will.”

Suga’s teeth found his bottom as he tried to resist some impatient little quip and he settled down obediently, looking up at Daichi and waiting as best as he could. Daichi’s hands landed on Suga’s thighs to spread them more and Suga couldn’t help the small arch of his back, the too breathy sigh that left him.

Daichi was warm as he moved forward, settled himself above Suga. The smile on his face was almost too fond for Suga to handle, so Suga hid it away by leaning up and kissing Daichi- hungry, with just a touch of need. Daichi allowed the kiss for a few moments before ending it with a nip and nudging Suga to lay on his back again, huffing at the pout that Suga sent him.

A pout that went away as soon as Daichi leaned forward and Suga felt Daichi’s cock against his hole. He immediately tried to push back against it and Daichi clicked his tongue, gently holding Suga still before rocking forward ever so slightly in a tease that left his head so close to entering Suga, but kept right on the edge of actually doing so.

“You are so impatient, my Human,” Daichi murmured to him, rubbing over Suga’s sides after a quiet, almost upset noise sounded in his throat. “Relax, Koushi. I will take care of you.”

Suga shivered at the sound of his given name, the way it passed by Daichi’s lip. Low and intimate, it had Suga’s need spiking up more and Daichi took advantage of his rising desire by rocking into him and drawing out a loud moan, an arching of his back and his hand reaching to grab at the pillows behind him.

“Daichi!” Suga gasped.

“Koushi,” Daichi rumbled out in return, hands tightening on Suga’s sides when Suga squeezed around him. “So eager for your reward.”

Another moan left Suga before he could help it and he tried, near desperate, to fuck himself back against Daichi. The spirit kept a firm hold on him, though, and Suga was forced to stay still and feel the too slow way Daichi slid into him.

It was almost a bit too much. Daichi was thick and Suga wanted him so bad, was hungry for passion and a good fucking that would leave him dazed and pleasure drunk. The glacial pace at which Daichi rocked into him was a terrible tease, something that needed to be sped up before Suga lost his mind.

“Dai- ah!”

As soon as Suga opened his mouth to urge Daichi to move faster, Daichi slid in to the hilt- filling him completely and stretching Suga so perfectly he couldn’t help to gasp, moan and squeeze his eyes shut so they wouldn’t grow wet from just how good it felt.

Suga shuddered and Daichi let out a grunt as Suga squeezed around him, his hands squeezing at Suga’s waist in a way that made him feel small in such a good way.

“So good, my Human,” Daichi growled to him. “So good.”

A whimper left Suga- needy and quiet- and Daichi squeezed at his waist again, petting at him for a few moments before his hips began to pull back. Suga whined at that, but ended up moaning when Daichi rolled his hips forward to fill him again and Daichi groaned quietly as Suga rocked his own back to try to meet him.

“Ah, let me take care of you,” Daichi told him- near ordered him. His hands kept Suga still again and Suga looked up at him with a trembling pout, hungry for more. “Relax for me, Koushi.”

Oh, it wasn’t fair how good his name sounded on Daichi’s lips.

Suga tried to relax, tried to enjoy the slow, gentle pace that Daichi began to set for him. It did feel good, truly; the near languid rolls of the spirit’s hips and the way his cock- thick, hot, so perfect for him- kept filling him at its unhurried pace was delightful torture that kept Suga on the verge of desperate.

But it wasn’t enough, not quite what Suga wanted.

Daichi’s cock brushed against Suga’s sweet spot and Suga gasped at the sensation, arched his back and panted as he stare up at his supernatural lover through heavy eyes. He felt a little overwhelmed and a little flustered, flushed and needy as he caught sight of a bead of sweat rolling down Daichi- a tiny thing that caught the candlelight and slipped down the hollow of his throat, into a patch of chest hair.

Oh, god, Daichi was too much. He really wasn’t of this world.

Suga shuddered and reached up without thinking, gripping onto a thick bicep and digging his fingers in as he moaned and tried to wrap his legs around Daichi’s waist. Daichi moved to push them back down, though, and Suga was left tightening around him at the quiet strength Daichi used, left panting and pouting up at him.

“Dai...Daichi,” Suga moaned. “Please. If you’re not- _oh, there. There!_ ”

A growl left Daichi and he dipped down, hips grinding forward and sparking bright bursts of pleasure that had Suga wanting to writhe. Daichi’s lips found his forehead and smoothed down the bridge of his nose, brushed against his lips in a tease of a kiss before before nipping gently at Suga’s bottom one. It was sweet- gorgeous delight amongst slowly, exquisite torture.

But Suga needed more.

“Dai- Daichi, please,” Suga begged, unashamed and eager to reach his pleasure. “More. I need- Harder or- more- I-”

He whined, cutting himself off, and reached for one of Daichi’s hand, tugging it urgently to him and pressing it against his throat. Daichi blinked and he paused, surprise on his face as Suga squirmed beneath and tried to rock against him to get Daichi moving again.

“Koushi?” Daichi asked, hips rolling against him in a distracted little move and fingers flexing against Suga’s neck. “You want...this?”

His hand shifted to cup Suga’s throat properly and Suga had to bite his lip to keep from mewling, nodded the best he could and looked up at Daichi through his lashes.

“I want it,” Suga murmured, consciously squeezing around Daichi. “Please?”

There was a half-moment of uncertainty on Daichi’s face and Suga felt his own passing quiver of it, but then Daichi nodded and his hand pressed a bit more confidently- still light, but giving just enough pressure to make Suga’s moan.

“Okay, my Human,” Daichi told him, beginning to move again. “Okay.”

Suga trembled and he sighed, the end of it hitching up as he rocked his hips back to meet Daichi’s. The spirit met him and it was a bit faster than before, a bit more firm and verging on the precipice of being hard. It was perfect and it had Suga getting closer to falling to pieces, closer to tripping into another pit of pleasure.

“Fu- fuck,” Suga moaned out, one hand twisting at the sheets above his head and the other one digging nails into Daichi’s shoulder. “Like that, yeah.”

“Yeah?” Daichi breathed, leaning down and oh so carefully giving Suga’s throat the lightest squeeze. “Are you enjoying your reward, Koushi?”

God, it was like Daichi was trying to kill him.

Suga gasped and he fucked his hips back against Daichi, pressed into his hand and squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to cry out _yes._ He was too into it, though, to do more than let out eager noises that he might feel quiet embarrassment for later on but couldn’t possibly even pay attention to in the moment when Daichi’s cock felt so good in him.

Flushed and flustered, Suga melted beneath Daichi’s hand and fell to pieces as he was fucked and filled so perfectly, so wonderfully. He couldn’t help whimpering when Daichi’s hips moved in a quick snap, when his hand pressed just a bit tighter against his throat. Daichi’s breathing grew heavier and a light flush crossed over his cheeks, hunger flared in his eyes so obviously it was almost overwhelming.

“My Human feels so good,” Daichi rumbled out, dipping down to press his lips to Suga’s. “So. Good.”

A more firm snap of his hips had Suga crying out and Daichi let out a growl- loud and low and rippling through Suga like a burst of thunder. He was getting so, so close and everything was so, so much and Suga couldn’t help his near frantic squirm when he felt a swelling at the base of Daich’s cock, when there was the tease of being stretched even more.

“Daichi, Daichi,” Suga gasped, nails digging into Daichi’s shoulders and his hips tightening, his back arching. “I’m- oh, fuck, please-”

“Come for me, my Human,” Daichi growled out, hand pressing firmly against Suga’s throat. “Come on my cock, Koushi.”

The words hit Suga like lightning and he cried out, flashes of color splicing through the black when his eyes squeezed shut and pleasure cracked all up and down his spine. Everything was so hot and so much, perfectly overwhelming as his senses pitched to new heights and came crashing down in a roar of sheer bliss. His breathing hitched and he shook beneath Daichi, a half-sob slipping from him as his hips jerked and he started to come.

So wrapped up in his own riptide of satisfaction, Suga almost missed Daichi’s grunt and growl- the way his hips snapped forward tight, but then mind blanking pleasure rolled over him. He was feeling the aftermath of the spirit’s orgasm through their bond. Suga moaned, lashes fluttering, and he barely registered Daichi grinding into him, warmth flowing in as Daichi’s hand slipped from his throat and lips replacing it as his teeth grazed against the skin and hot breath fanned against him. The swelling at the base of Daichi’s cock rocked against him and Suga tiredly, nearly deliriously mumbled for it, huffed and panted as his mind washed away that fleeting thought when Daichi nipped at his jawline and hummed against him.

They didn’t say anything for a while and Suga luxuriated in the quiet, closed his eyes and soaked in the afterglow of his orgasm, the pleasant lightheadedness that made him sigh in pleasure. He was happy that Daichi stayed in him, happier still that Daichi nosed against his neck and kissed at it before letting out a long yawn. He felt good- wonderful, phenomenal, absolutely perfect- and Suga couldn’t help his smile, the drowsy contentment that crept over him.

“That was a fantastic reward,” Suga sighed out once his mind stopped its giddy spinning. He patted Daichi’s sweaty back and then slipped his hand up to his hair, carding his fingers through it happily. “Thank you.”

Daichi just hummed against him and Suga hid a smile at how drowsy it sounded, leaned his head down in a quick show of fondness as he pressed a kiss to Daichi’s hair.

“Sleep,” Suga declared with a yawn. “And then more rewards.”

Daichi snorted, but Suga could feel him smile against his throat and happily let his own lips curl into a smile of his own.

“Greedy,” Daichi rumbled against him, before pulling out of Suga with a groan. Suga winced at the emptiness, but he soon was distracted by it as arms moved to hold him before Daichi rolled them onto their sides. “We shall see.”

“Let me suck you off next,” Suga hummed, nestling against him with a pleased sigh. “That would be a good reward.”

Another snort and Daichi pulled Suga closer, burying his face in his hair and yawning.

“We shall see, my Human,” Daichi mumbled. “We shall we.”

Suga grinned and he shut his eyes, letting his pleasure and his sleepiness take him over.

+++

“Peach,” Daichi admitted, his hand lazily running up and down Suga’s side. The silver haired man tilted his head up from where it was resting on a broad shoulder to squint suspiciously.

“Your favourite ice cream flavor is peach?”

“Is that strange? It is very good. I have fond memories of sitting on the river banks and eating it off a stick,” Daichi countered, trying to defend his awful life choices.

“That’s a popsicle! Ice cream comes in a cone or freeform in a bowl. ‘What’s your favorite icecream’ was the question.”

“It was frozen and creamy,” Daichi pointed out, looking down at Suga with a raised brow, “That makes it ice cream. Popsicles are hard and crunchy, like ice. I do know the difference.”

Suga huffed then settled down against Daichi’s shoulder again, nuzzling into it a bit, “I don’t accept that answer. We will revisit this.”

“I don’t have to ask what your favorite is,” Daichi said, awkward over the contraction, emphasizing the ‘t’ too much. Suga hadn’t even realized the spirit had been speaking so formally until he began using contractions. It was explained away as Daichi still adjusting to being in a human form; just like how he struggled to use chopsticks or hold a fork.

“Oh?” Suga hummed, prodding at Daichi’s chest, “What’s my favorite then?”

“Coffee.”

Suga slapped at Daichi’s chest, earning an ‘oof!’ but then snuggled closer. “You’re right. Coffee with strawberries. Or Chili flakes. Both are good. But not together.”

“And you think my answer was strange?”

“Your answer is strange. Coffee is a normal ice cream flavor. Beloved by millions, but most importantly me.” 

Daichi shook his head and Suga felt a surge of fondness come through their bond. He turned his head a little to hide a smile against Daichi’s skin.

“Alright, my turn. Favorite childhood trip.” 

“Oh, that’s a good one,” Suga hummed, trying to think of his answer. “We didn’t travel a lot, not really- my mom hates to travel. But we went to this huge aquarium for her birthday and they had a whole exhibit about deep sea life and it was super creepy and I loved it. The creepy blinking lights in darkness.” 

As he finished his answer, Daichi leaned to kiss the top of his head, “You do enjoy creepy things, I should not be surprised.”

“Alright, what about you?”

“My first outing into the human world,” Daichi started, words soft and smile on his lips. “The village was not more than a few far between farms, so to have me properly meet Humans, they took me to the coast. It was a fishing village that had a small boardwalk. We went during a festival and I remember having so much fun. I have always wanted to go back to a beach.”

Suga fond himself smiling at Daichi’s answer, even if it made him question how old the spirit truly was. “I’ve always wanted to go to the beach. I never really have gone.” 

Daichi squeeze his hip, pressing another kiss to his hair as he responded, “You should go, and watch a sunset over the ocean. It is a beautiful thing.”

They lapsed into a silence, Suga not sure if he should ask another question. The back and forth questions had fun, light, superficial and Suga wasn’t sure if he wanted to know deeper things about the spirit he was getting fucked by like it was going out of style. It opened the pathway to emotions and learning even more about magic. Since meeting with Ennoshita he had put up a firm wall of not learning anymore about magic; it had been a whirlwind of editing and orgasms.

So instead of trying to come up with anything creative, Suga closed his eyes and listened to the fire crackling behind him. It drowned out the storm outside, but was just as relaxing. He was bordering on exhausted and deserved relaxing. 

He had edited six chapters that day and the reward for finishing each was an orgasm. It was a record for him and he could certainly feel it. They had been spaced out throughout the day, but he was at a point that he was so sensitive he was pretty sure he’d cry if Daichi so much as looked at his dick for the next twenty four hours. Daichi had, of course, gone above and beyond for the last chapter of the night, laying him out in front of the fire and making Suga come before he even fucked him- which, of course, resulted in yet another orgasm. 

Suga wondered if Daichi was as horny as Suga was all the time or if he was trying to make up for something.

Which of course would make for an interesting question. 

“When is the last time you had sex?” 

“About twenty minutes ago, do you already want to go again?”

Suga made a face at the idea of another round, “I don’t think I can handle it. And I meant before me. The last time you had sex before me.”

“Ah,” the spirit said, then quieted. Suga took the chance to peek up at him, his lips turning up at the cute little wrinkle in Daichi’s brow. He had a nice thinking face. 

“It has been a while,” he began slowly, still thinking as he spoke, “I am not sure what it would be in Human terms. I had a mate, before I became a Guardian and for some time after, but we realized what we felt for each other was more of a deep friendship. She had been romantically interested at the beginning, but once I assumed my role and there was the expectation of an heir, things changed. She did not want to compromise her role in the Forest and we came to the conclusion it was best we were no longer mates.” He paused, the his thinking wrinkle disappeared and the spirit looked down at Suga with a hint of amusement. “I think you would like her.”

“Her…?” Suga asked. While the ‘her’ part was a complete surprise, Suga’s mind was caught on the word ‘mate’ and his traitorous mind was thinking about all the horrible werewolf porn he had read and how he had essentially landed himself in the plot of one.

Shapeshifting dog spirit was close enough to a werewolf.

Did werewolves even exist? 

He did not need to be going down this path, he’d much rather be learning about Life eating frogs.

“Ah, yes,” Daichi said, startling him out of his horrible train of thought. “Yui. She is the protector of the Springs, a series of well...springs that have healing properties. When you were ill, taking you to them was one of the options we considered, but they are deep in the mountains and carrying you to them would have taken too long.” 

Suga tilted his head a little to better look up at Daichi, squirming until he wasn’t craning his neck. “Are they hot springs? Like the one out back and the river?”

“No, they are normal little springs that are blessed by a shrine that they surround.” He paused a moment then quickly added, “If you meet Yui- which I hope you do, as she is my good friend and I believe you two will get along, she hits almost as hard as you do- do not call her a Shrine Maiden. She gets very annoyed with that.”

Suga made a little noise of understanding, though he wasn’t sure how keen he was to meet Daichi’s ex.

He was a little curious, but not enough to actually interact with people. 

“I will not piss off the not a Shrine Maiden if I meet her.”

That earned a soft little chuckle which segued into Daichi brushing his lips over Suga’s hair, “what about you?”

Suga made a face. He should have known it would come back at him like that- that was how the question back-and-forth had been going- but, for some reason, it hadn’t occurred to him. It wasn’t a topic he particularly wanted to think on, but he supposed it was fair. He had asked Daichi the same thing.

“Since my ex and I broke up, so uh….a while now. More than a few months,” he admitted, trying to ignore the way his stomach was knotting up. 

Daichi squeezed his hip, and when he opened his mouth, Suga thought he was going to ask about the feelings he was probably projecting, but he didn’t. Instead he got a curious, “Would you ever get another tattoo?” 

The question threw Suga for a moment and it took him a moment to answer, “I would, but I don’t know what I would want. I’d have to actually sit and think about it. I do want piercings, though. I know that.”

There was a little tug of interest across the bond and a little smirk found its way to his lips.

“What kind of piercings?” Daichi asked, not at all hiding the way his eyes roamed over what he could see of Suga. “Piercings and tattoos are rather popular in the realm Tanaka and Asahi come from and I am wondering if they are in the same places Humans get them.”

Suga tried to picture the crows with piercings, but cringed at the idea of trying to shift with a piercing in. That was a mess waiting to happen. Instead he thought of the pieces of metal he wanted to shove through his body. 

“Ones that will make my mother have a heart attack,” Suga started, his smirk growing. “Nipples are the first, but they take forever to heal. I don’t know what it is called, but the little bar through the top of my ear. I want a lip stud thing, but I’m positive I wouldn’t be able to stop playing with it.”

The look Daichi gave him was positively priceless; a mix of surprised that quickly morphed into hunger. The spirit tugged Suga even closer, so he was practically laying on the board chest he had been using as a pillow. Suga patted at his shoulder shaking his head, “I cannot go another round, I will die. Calm your dick.”

Hunger turned into surprise and confusion, Daichi’s brows knitting together before mouthing back at Suga, “Calm my dick?”

Suga huffed in amusement, then squirmed around until he was comfortable in his new position, “What about you? Do you want tattoos or piercings to join all your scars?”

Daichi’s hand found a home on the small of Suga’s back and his thumb began to move in soothing little motions as he answered, “I have never thought about it before. I would not know what to even get.” 

Suga hummed, acknowledging that he heard the answer. It was his turn yet again to ask a question and once again he didn’t know if he wanted to ask anything. He was enjoying the causality- he was much more comfortable around Daichi since they had first kissed. He was still unsure about all the magic and there was so very much he was refusing to even look at and process and maybe the mentality of ‘ignore it all and hope it goes away while making out with the person who dragged you into this mess’ wasn’t the best, but it was what he was going with. 

It was easy to put on blinders and think only about editing and fucking. It was clearly how he best dealt with problems. 

All he wanted to care about was finishing his manuscript’s first draft. Anything that happened in the meantime or happened after it was completed was a problem for Future Suga.

Something soft and warm twitched inside him and it took Suga a moment to realize it was coming from his bond with Daichi. He tilted his head to look up at the spirit, his heart pounding at the way Daichi was watching him with a content look.

“What?” Suga asked, suddenly self conscious.

“You look tired. Should I carry you to bed or would you like to sleep here?” Daichi asked, voice soft like Suga was about to pass out any minute. 

While it was past Suga’s self imposed bedtime, he wasn’t quite ready to go to sleep. His body was tired, brought to exhaustion with too many orgasms in a short amount of time, but his mind was still active, jumping around to things that would eventually give him a headache.

But he would not pass up the chance to be carried around by Daichi. 

“Carry me to bed,” he demanded, only a little bit whiny. “I can’t feel my legs anymore.”

Daichi huffed, fondness coming from him in waves. He pushed the blankets, which were mostly gathered around Suga’s waist, onto the floor, then moved to sit up. Suga went with him, not by his own power; he was leaning heavily on the spirit and was moved by him. 

As Daichi stood, he hauled Suga up along with him. The thought crossed the silver haired man’s mind to pretend to be boneless, just to be a pain, but he quickly concluded that would lead to manhandling and would go down the path on Daichi between his legs again. 

So he was good and stood until Daichi scooped him up. He wrapped his arms around the spirit’s neck so they weren’t awkwardly just hanging. He beamed up at Daichi, earning another wave of fondness before he leaned down to kiss Suga gently. It wasn’t hungry or raw like many of their kisses had been, just a sweet little thing that warmed Suga’s chest. 

When the spirit pulled back, and Suga opened his eyes which he didn’t realize he had closed, the room was dark. The fire had been extinguished by magic and Suga was slowly getting used to the causality of it. 

Little things like the lighting of a fire, keeping water warm, or enhancing food were magics that he was okay with. They were useful, domestic little things and Suga wondered if Daichi was trying to gateway drug him into more grand things. 

He didn’t want to think about it. Instead, he nudged at the spirit’s shoulder with this nose, “Onward, faithful steed. To the bed.”

“I will drop you,” Daichi deadpanned, starting to walk anyways. 

He was deposited into the bed with great care and Daichi crawled in behind him. It had only been a few days, but they had already established their roles in bed.

Suga liked to nestle himself under the comforters, warm and cozy, while Daichi curled around him, outside of the blankets. It was kind of like spooning, but there was a layer or three of blankets in between them. 

He knew, as he got himself comfortable and Daichi’s arm slid around his nest, that he should get up and wash his face and brush his teeth. But he didn’t want to move; once he laid down it was always so, so hard to get himself back up and, despite the fact he had told himself he wasn’t mentally tired at all, he could feel his eyelids becoming heavy.

The heavy rains were the perfect lullaby and he found himself starting to drift easily. He felt lips brush over the shell of his ear and just barely breathed into his ear, “Good night, my Human. Sleep well.” 

Warmth tingled from his ear, to neck, and down his spine and Suga was in a deep sleep before he ever realized a spell had been cast on him.

+++ 

The storm was finally beginning to pass.

The downpour lightened to something that looked like it wouldn’t pierce the skin if it struck someone and Suga had to sit close to the window if he wanted to be able to actually hear it. 

Which was exactly what he had done.

He couldn’t constantly go, go, go with editing- even with the rewards Daichi was offering him. His mind needed a break that was more than fucking.

He’d burn himself out if he didn’t actually relax, so he had dragged the nest of blankets that lived in front of the fireplace to be by the large window and had hunkered down with a book. He had been reading it before he had come to the Cabin, but he honestly had no idea what the hell had been happening so he had just started over. 

It was nice to curl up with a book on a rainy day. It reset him in so many ways he had not even realized he had needed. Tension bled out of him and he was a happy in his blanket pile with a cup of tea and good book.

Daichi was in the kitchen and with the spirit’s admittance that he was not a good cook, he wondered if he should be worried. But Daichi had requested Suga’s tablet, poking around at it with a serious expression before disappearing with the claim he was going to make lunch. 

So far there had been no fire or swearing to pull him out of his book and he was more than happy to get lost in a polyamorous mafia romance with murderous highlights.

His life didn’t completely revolve around horror.

The chapter he was reading ended on a cliff hanger, the undercover cop had discovered the mafia king knew what he was the entire time. Suga hadn’t actually gotten that far in his first attempt, so it was all new material and he was excited to find out what happened next when Daichi waltzed back into the main room looking triumphant. 

“Lunch is ready.”

“Right now?” Suga asked, fingers itching to turn the page, to find out what happened next. Would the undercover cop run or fall under the king’s charm? 

Daichi crossed his arms, looking mildly authoritative- which was completely undermine by the amusement Suga could feel coming from him. “You can finish it after. You need to eat.”

Suga wanted to fight it, to snuggle under his blanket and dive back into his book, but he was kind of hungry and Daichi looked so proud of whatever he had cooked. 

“Only if you be my pillow after,” was his counter argument.

“I was going to be anyways,” Daichi huffed, a small smile coming to his face. “I am enjoying the numbers game on your tablet.”

“The numbers game?” Suga asked as marked his place in his book and climbed out of his blanket pile. “Sudoku?” 

Daichi nodded, waiting patiently for Suga to get up before leading them into the kitchen. “Yes, I enjoy it. And the one where you trace the shapes in one line. Technology has evolved a lot since I last properly used it.” 

Suga mildly wondered when that was, but he thought it might be a little rude to ask. He was gathering Daichi was a lot older than he looked, maybe at least a century old. It was mind boggling to think about, that Daichi looked the same age as Suga, but was at least old enough to be his grandfather. 

Not to mention the whole not even a Human thing.

He was going to get a complex if he kept thinking about it, so he focused on the other half of Daichi’s words instead.

“So, you enjoy the puzzle games and brain teasers?”

Daichi thought a moment, then nodded as they entered the kitchen. “Yes. I tried the one with the birds, where you throw them, but I kept missing and ended up wanting to throw the tablet instead. I’ve also been reading some of the books you have on it and using the Wiki button. I have been very out of touch with the Human world.”

That was surprising to Suga, and he was going to ask more about it, but he noticed the huge pot of delicious looking food on the counter. He could smell chili and spices and could see chunks of chicken floating in egg and rice and he gasped softly.

“You made oyakodon?”

He saw Daichi shrug out of the corner of his eye, “I tried. I found a recipe online and added some of those chilis you like.”

It looked absolutely delicious, especially compared to the very lazy meals Suga had been making. 

He was ushered to the dining table, Daichi insisting he be the one to serve the food. 

“I was thinking,” Daichi said as he placed a mouth-watering bowl of food in front of Suga, “that we could give the leftovers to Asahi and Tanaka, if you did not want to keep them. They love it when you give them the scraps. They are mostly eat bird things, seeds and berries and plants, but they do enjoy meat on occasion.”

Suga took a moment to consider the idea. He was fine giving the leftovers to the two crows; it was an extension of the idea of scraps, but he felt maybe they could do more. 

“We could invite them in for dinner?”

Daichi eyed him a long moment before, “Are you sure you would be comfortable with that? I know you were against meeting their Human forms before. Meeting both at once would not be overwhelming?”

“If we do it tonight it would be, but maybe tomorrow night or the next night? It is still kind of a lot and honestly I’m happily living in the bubble of inside this Cabin, but I met the Healer and sitting with Asahi wasn’t so bad. So something small and if I have enough alcohol, I think I’ll be okay,” Suga said, waving his chopsticks around as he spoke. As he finished, he swooped down and shoved a chicken cutlet into his mouth. There was a surprising amount of heat to it and Suga concluded Daichi not knowing how to cook was a bunch of bullshit. “This is really good.”

“Thank you, and if you think you would be okay with it, I would be glad to invite them. That would make them very happy.” 

“I think we would need to go shopping again,” Suga pointed out between bites, “to make enough for four people. The rain will hopefully pass by tomorrow morning. If it does, I’m going to go down to town.”

That earned a look from the spirit and Suga felt a tug of worry inside of him.

“Are you sure that is a good idea?”

Suga shrugged in response, “The Healer, Ennoshita, said to wait for the rain to pass and I should be okay to go down to town. I want to go down to town. No offense, but I just want...normal mundane non-magical interactions. I want to go to the store. Get the bike. Get out of the Cabin. It’s been,” he taking a moment to count backwards then groaned, “it’s only been a week since I last went down. How can it only have been a week? It feels like it has been a month.”

“A lot has happened,” Daichi said, trying to offer some sort of comfort. “It distorts your sense of time.”

“I’m not sure if that helped or not,” Suga commented, shoving more chicken into his mouth. So many things had happened though, and Suga hoped that his remaining week in the Cabin was not as eventful.

The realization hit him suddenly. 

His month long stay was almost up. After that night, he only had one week left before returning home. 

He’d be away from all the magic and then what? 

Try to forget about it and go on with his life?

Be on the constant look out for something supernatural?

He didn’t know.

He didn’t want to think of it.

So he shoved it down as he put more food into his mouth. He tried to imagine it as unwanted thoughts and fears, then swallowed it down. 

Daichi gave him a concerned look and Suga knew he was going to ask something, so Suga beat him to the punch. 

“When I go down to the village what are you going to do? If you’re a Guardian, shouldn’t you be...guarding the Forest?”

The spirit eyed him, like he knew Suga was trying to distract him, before answering. “No one has called out for anything and the Crows have been keeping an eye on things. If someone needed my help, I would have gone, but for the most part, everyone is pretty self sufficient.” 

Suga thought back to what he kind of sort of remembered of what Daichi had told him about being a Guardian, when he had explained things the first time around. 

“You help with disputes and protecting the little things, right?” 

Asking about his job didn’t seem like it would be a too overwhelming thing to talk about. Suga could handle it, and he was a little curious, but mostly he wanted actual conversation.

Daichi finished his own bite of food before replying, “For the most part, yes. I also help new beings figure out the Forest and chase out the Humans. Though, in your case, I suppose, I am protecting you, so I have been doing my job.”

“I guess that counts.” 

“But since you brought it up,” Daichi said with a huff, “I will probably make my rounds tomorrow while you go down to the village, unless you would like me to go with you.”

Suga made a face at the idea of Daichi going down with him. He kind of wanted to be alone, even if it meant he had to walk down the mountain path by himself. Daichi huffed again, clearly amused by Suga’s scowl.

“I will let you be and give you space and make my rounds.”

A thought occurred to as Daichi spoke and Suga found his mouth working before his brain, again, “Do your rounds go by the clearing? With the little flower fairy?” 

“Yachi?”

Suga nodded, thinking that was the name that Daichi had mentioned. 

“She is a sprite, but no, she is not part of my territory. She is under the protection of the other Guardian.”

Suga deflated a little bit at that news. “Oh.” Daichi gave him a questioning look and Suga elaborated, “I wanted to give her my thanks. For protecting me from...whatever was in that clearing.” 

There was confusion for a moment and then Daichi was smiling, “I can make a detour to do that for you. Would you like to offer just words or something physical?” 

Suga thought about it for a moment. Something physical would be best, properly show his gratitude and not offend the not-fairy. “What do you even offer a flower sprite as a thank you?”

“Well,” Daichi started, brow furrowed in thought, “I would not offer her any flowers, but perhaps some fruit? Tea?”

Suga thought over the suggestion the nodded, “That sounds nice. I can make like...a little basket? And maybe I can add a little hand written story or letter?”

Daichi gave him a hard look, but he couldn’t hide the smile trying to creep onto his lips, “You should be working on your novel, not starting new projects.”

Suga waved a dismissive hand at him, “It’s a thank you for saving my life. Not a new project.”

“Oh? And what do I get for saving your life?”

“You get to be my pillow.”


	14. Sugar Cane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My skill set includes making dumb decisions and telling stories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its an Ace of Base shirt.

Despite days of heavy rain, the road down the mountain was relatively dry. There were a few potholes filled with mud and water, but they were easily avoided. 

The sun was shining down brightly, like it was trying to make up for having been hidden behind clouds, warming everything to the point that Suga had long shrugged off his jacket and tied it around his waist.

He had forgotten how long it took to walk down the path to the town at the base of the mountain, or maybe he was just walking slower, more cautious. He was hyper aware of every sound - the chirps of birds, the rustling of leaves - and he was torn between wanting to enjoy the solitude in nature and running as fast as he could to get away from anything wanting to eat him.

But if he ran, that was just inviting something to chase him. 

So he walked, back straight, and told himself that Daichi’s protection would keep him safe.

He tried to enjoy his walk; it was freeing to be able to leave the Cabin and actually be outside. He had yet to get a headache and his nose was not pouring blood, so he supposed that Ennoshita had been correct in his assumption about his timeline. It was comforting to know he’d actually be able to leave the Forest.

He refused to think about what would happen if his month stay was up and he couldn’t actually leave. 

Instead he focused on what he wanted to buy from the store. 

He had thought a bit about what he wanted to make for what he deemed the Crow Dinner and- with input from Daichi- had decided on a milder version of the thai chili soup he had made when he first arrived at the Cabin. So technically, it would not be thai chili soup, because he would not be using thai chilis. He hoped the store had mild peppers, maybe pasilla. They would add flavor without burning Daichi’s mouth. Apparently, the spirit was not a fan of spicy things. 

He made a mental list as he walked and, before he knew it, he was planning something closer to ramen than soup and he could see the first of the buildings in the village.

Before he stepped down from the mountain path onto the main road, Suga raised his hand up and felt over his lips. 

No blood. 

Confident he wouldn’t terrify the first person he saw, he stepped into the village and started towards the store.

The streets were mostly empty with a few elderly people walking between shops and Suga was grateful for the quiet. He did not think he could have handled going from isolated to a big hustle and bustle. He needed to adjust to Actual People again. 

He was only convinced they were Actual People and not spirits or demons in disguise because Daichi had told him such. 

While it was apparently common for the supernatural to live in cities and towns alongside Humans, the spirit said the village at the base of the mountain was all Human. There was an explanation about proximity to the Forest and realm borders that Suga did not at all understand, but Daichi had been very confident, so Suga believed him. 

At least enough to feel safe going into town; and if someone tried to eat him it was because they were deranged and not a monster.

The same risks as living in the big city. 

There were a few customers milling around outside of the store, gossiping about something or other. He offered them a smile as he passed, despite the way their eyes looked him up and down. Even in smaller towns, old ladies tended to be judgemental.

The not so warm welcome was counteracted once he passed through the doors; Yuuji was at the counter and broke out into a grin at the sight of Suga.

“We thought you got washed out by all the rain!” the man declared, easily hopping over the counter and making his way to Suga.

“No, I’ve just been working,” he replied, half lying. He hadn’t just been working, but Yuuji did not need to know those details. He wasn’t sure how he would even begin to describe everything that happened; not that he even wanted to. 

He didn’t want to expose anyone else to the knowledge he had gained and he certainly didn’t want to come off as insane. 

Yuuji made it to him in a few short steps, looking him up and down in a completely different way than the ladies outside had. Suga felt his cheeks heat up and wondered if Daichi would get jealous if Suga dragged him off to a broom closet.

Guilt coursed through Suga at the thought. 

He wasn’t dating Daichi and he could fuck whoever he wanted, but it felt a bit wrong to want to get tension out with Yuuji. He had some sort of connection with the spirit, beyond their bond, and maybe there was some inkling of feelings, brought on by spending so much time together.  
He would worry about that later.

“Are you almost done?” Yuuji asked, bringing Suga out of his thoughts and back into reality. 

Suga shrugged, “Almost. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.”

Yuuji grinned at him, tongue ring glinting in the light as he spoke, “Then you need lots of alcohol to celebrate!”

“You are absolutely correct, but I also need things to eat in the meantime. What type of peppers do you have in stock?” 

The bleach blonde led him over to the produce, warmly asking what Suga liked to do when he wasn’t editing. Suga told him about the documentaries and shows he watched, since he was sure fucking a shapeshifting spirit wasn’t an appropriate answer. 

As it turned out, Yuuji enjoyed the same show and they ended up walking around the store spewing off theories as Suga shopped. 

“Oh, I totally think he’s like, actually dead, but not from that,” Yuuji proclaimed, leading Suga back up to the shop’s counter, where Abe had taken over the register. There were only two other customers in the store, so it seemed like she did not mind her son chatting up Suga when he should have been working. “I think he died, like, pre-story. There’s so many hints at it.”

“I can see that,” Suga agreed, setting his basket on the counter as Yuuji took over the register with a shooing motion at Abe, “but it isn’t my favourite theory. Mine is -”

“Oh, you are not into that show as well, are you?” Abe asked, putting her hands on her hips. Suga shrugged, earning an exasperated sigh. “It is all I hear about when his friends come over.”

“It isn’t like there is anything else to do around here,” Yuuji pointed out, starting to ring up Suga’s purchase. “Plus it is interesting to watch and compare it to our own haunted forest.”

Abe clicked her tongue, and Suga offered, “It is better than us talking boring politics.” 

“I suppose,” she sighed, waving her hand as she dismissed herself to go tend to something else in the store. 

“Do you think you could survive an apocalypse?” Yuuji asked, turning their conversation back to the show.

Suga made a face, “Definitely not. No. I’m the character who would survive mid-way, who the audience gets attached to, who then dies a very sudden and unexpected death. Like, standing around talking in a group, thinking the danger has passed, then boom! Headshot from nowhere. That sort of death. Quick, painless, heartbreaking.”

“You’ve thought about that way too much,” Yuuji pointed out with a grin. 

“I’m an author,” he reminded the bleach-blonde.

“What about your skill set? Are you handy with a knife? You clearly aren’t afraid of traipsing into danger since you stay up in the Cabin. Real life apocalypse.”

Suga gave a huff of laughter, “My skill set includes making dumb decisions and telling stories. I’m sure I could survive for a bit, but anything long term and World Ending, I’m sticking to my answer.”

Yuuji shook his head, an amused smile coming across his lips. “I think I could survive, depending on the type. I mean, anything nuclear I think we are all fucked, but my friends and I did a challenge a few years ago, where you go live in the woods for a week and you go in with nothing but a backpack. It turned out pretty good. But that was in Europe and not here.”

“You willingly went off grid?” Suga asked, not able to imagine it. He’d die in a day without his laptop. 

“It was college,” was the response, like it made perfect sense. Suga shook his head. He wanted no part of that. Though, he supposed, now that he knew about supernatural things and demons and Life, an apocalypse would be a completely different type of event. 

Daichi would probably survive in a post apocalyptic society. 

As Suga finished paying for his groceries and they packed them up, Yuuji told him about another challenge he wanted to do. It was only a theory at the moment, but a large scale urban post apocalyptic environment where people had to find supplies and set up a base, while there were other people and teams in the environment. 

“Pretty much like a huge LARP thing. I was thinking, like, one scenario could be zombies and you have to avoid them and if you, like, get tagged or something by a zombie, you’d be out. It would be like a once a year, big event. Lots of volunteers and fun. It wouldn’t survive as a business,” Yuuji explained, putting the last of the groceries into the totes. 

“You’ve put a lot of thought into it,” Suga commented.

“As much thought as you have about how you’d survive the apocalypse.”

Suga huffed at the shot, then smiled. “Fair enough.” He took advantage of the break in the conversation and moved on to something he had been meaning to ask, “Is my bike still around?”

Yuuji nodded, moving to come around the counter and motioning for Suga to follow him to the bike, “Sorry I never got around to bringing it back up for you. Everyone was stocking up for the storm and there is no way I’m going up there at night.”

“No, it’s understandable. Thank you for holding onto it.”

“Mom was joking about charging you room and board for it,” Yuuji teased as they went into the backroom. The bike was leaning against the wall that had the door on it and Suga was glad to see it was safe and sound. It wasn’t his and he wasn’t too keen on the idea of having to replace it. 

But another part of him was not at all thrilled to see the bike because it meant he had to bike back up the mountain. 

He really, really needed to get in shape. 

Yuuji helped him wheel the bike back up to the front of the shop and load groceries on to it. 

“This isn’t your last shopping trip before you leave, is it? You said you’re only going to be here a month,” Yuuji asked as Suga climbed onto the bike. Guilt coursed through Suga- he hadn’t even thought about Yuuji or his mother in his existential crisis over leaving. The two shop workers had been so kind to him.

“I hope not, but I will be sure to come by before I leave if I don’t end up needing more,” Suga promised. 

Yuuji thumped him hard on the back before making him promise to not die trying to bike back up the mountain. Suga debated, as he started pedalling, just walking the bike up the path and using it to carry his groceries, but he was stubborn and determined. 

He was also extremely stupid and barely made it a third of the way before he was huffing and puffing. 

He told his pride to take a hike as he all but tumbled off the bike and doubled over, trying desperately to catch his breath. 

It was harder than it had been a few weeks ago, but since that time he had also nearly died, been given Life, and countless other things.

Plus, he was carrying more groceries than before.

There was no shame in walking the bike up the mountain. 

He took a few more moments to feel like he was not inhaling ash. His lungs burned and his legs were a little more than wobbly. Once he felt like he wasn’t going to fall over face first after a few steps, Suga began to push the bike up the mountain. 

It was so much easier than trying to ride up. 

“A shower,” he told himself, “with the fancy soap you brought from home but haven’t once used. And horny shapeshifters get to wait outside.” He paused, thinking that over, then amended, “Horny shapeshifter can join if he washes your hair for you. But only one round of sex or nothing is going to get done.”

He drifted into thinking about the dinner he had only partially but carefully planned. He had bought whatever high-end items the little country grocery store had to offer. He had no knowledge about wines other than he liked to drink them, but he had gotten something on the top shelf with a fancy label, so hopefully it paired well with the not-really-ramen soup.

He would offend his mother and grandmother and great grandmother if he dared to call it a real ramen. They had very specific definitions of what type of broth ramen had to be in and store bought canned broth was not in the definition. 

He hadn’t really learned to cook from his mother; she had a huge cookbook of passed down recipes but it had never been his passion. He knew enough to make nice enough things, nice enough to present to people, but he didn’t really -

His train of thought was cut off as the bushes on the side of the road began to shake. He stopped, gripping the handle bars tight, ready to turn and pedal back down the road as fast as he could. 

He realized, as the bush shook more, that the ambient sounds of the forest had quieted. No chirping birds, no wind in the leaves; everything was still except the bush in front of him.

A huge blur of bright color leapt from the bush, landing in the middle of the road. Suga stumbled back, barely containing a scream as he recognized that the large multicolored thing was human-shaped.

It was a kid, or maybe a teenager- Suga was awful with ages and the person was short. They had shockingly bright orange hair and were wearing the most horrifically 1990s sports sweatshirt Suga had ever seen. It had a faded white base, with lime green sleeves, black and white checkered trim that also made a band around the chest, with a bright purple logo on the stomach, and cream and purple bands on one sleeve. It was baggy on their thin frame and paired with neon yellow biker shorts. 

It took Suga almost ten seconds to realize the person had a huge fluffy brown tail, pointed ears, and markings on their cheeks that resembled whiskers.

Suga took a step back as the person stepped towards them. 

“You have to help us,” the person shouted, sounding more than a little frantic, “Kageyama got attacked by the frogs and now his leg is all gross and he can’t walk and little ones keep showing up!”

Suga stared at the kid with the bushy brown tail and horrible fashion sense. Why was he asking Suga for help? Suga couldn’t help him.

But he looked scared and panicked and so out of place in the Forest, even with a tail and face markings. Suga wasn’t frightened of him, even knowing he was potentially dangerous. 

And he had mentioned the frogs. Suga knew from his own encounter with them that they were nothing to be messed with. 

“Please?” the kid asked, stepping forward as he did, his tail drooping down. 

The kid was asking for help. He was probably looking for Daichi or that other Guardian. Suga had no idea how he could help.

“Where is he?” 

The kid jumped in the air, legs spreading into a split as he gave a ‘whoop’ of a cheer. His tail perked back up as he landed.

“Thank you! Neither of us are any good at healing and every time he uses his fire and fwooshes them away more appear so I gave him a big stick to thwack ‘em with but that’s not gonna work for long!” the kid explained, voice loud enough to almost be shouting. Suga had no idea what the hell any of his words were supposed to mean. 

The kid came a few steps closer and thrusted out his hand, his panicked look melting into a bright smile, “I’m Hinata, by the way! I don’t think we’ve ever really met before!” 

“No, uh, I don’t think we have,” Suga answered, shaking the kid- Hinata’s- hand. “I’m Sugawara. Most people call me Suga.” 

Hinata dropped his hand and then pointed toward the bush he had come from, “He’s that way. I think. We were over by the border collecting some stuff for Yachi when one of those big ugly ones popped out of a tree trunk. It got Kageyama before we could kill it. We got a little bit away before his leg went all Bleh and we were by all those boulders.”

Suga tried to take in all the information he was given. He knew the name Yachi- she was the little flower spirit who had maybe protected him. He had written her a thank you note and a poem about nightshade that Daichi was meant to deliver that day. If they were friends, that probably meant that Hinata was not leading him into some sort of trap.

But the more important information was that Hinata did not know where exactly he had left his injured friend. 

“You...think he’s that way?” Suga asked, trying to clarify.

Hinata nodded, “I mean, I know he’s by the boulders and I know where those are. I can lead you to him, don’t worry! We just have to follow the yelling and fox fire!” 

That didn’t sound at all concrete, but Hinata was already marching back toward the bush he had came out of. 

Suga hesitated, then put the kickstand down on the bike, and followed after the kid. 

At least he was trekking into the Forest with shoes on.

Hinata did seem to know where he was going, which was a relief. He had his brow wrinkled in concentration as he lead Suga through the trees, weaving through them, then suddenly turing different ways at landmarks Suga couldn’t see. 

Or, Suga prayed he knew where they were going and Hinata wasn’t just deciding things randomly. 

The Forest kept silent, save for the crunching of leaves under his feet. 

Hinata’s steps were soft enough not be heard and Suga took a moment to look down at his feet. He was barefoot, and he looked like he was walking on the balls of his feet. His heels were in the air and his toes were clawed. They reminded Suga of how Dai’s feet were. 

Would it be rude to ask Hinata what he was? His tail was almost as big as he was and so very fluffy and Suga was sure it was supposed to be a defining feature, but didn’t have any real knowledge of demons or spirits. All of his references were from folklore and television shows. 

Suga decided to go another route instead.

“How long have you been in this realm?” 

Hinata looked back at him, a wide smile blooming on his face. “Oh, not very long. A few years? We kinda go back and forth! The Forest is really great! We want to try living in a Human city, but everything is all whoosh and fyah! Kageyama says we have to transition, but I think he’s just using fancy words.” 

Hinata punctuated his words with over enthusiastic hand movements and none of them helped Suga figure out how cities were ‘whoosh’ and ‘fyah’. But they were endearing and if all the demons and spirits who lived among Humans were like Hinata, Suga would be a little more relaxed at the concept.

“Have you visited a Human city?” Suga asked, curious if the orange haired whatever he was had actually knowingly interacted with a Human.

Hinata nodded, “Yeah! That’s where we got these cool clothes! Kageyama brought Human money from home and we got some cool things! They have lots of really tasty things and they are on sticks! Oh, and we rode the train! It’s so different from back home- it doesn’t even fly!” 

Suga smiled at the excited shouting; the kid’s enthusiasm for everything was infectious. “And that worked out well? The train?”

“Oh no,” Hinata chirped, turning to beam up at Suga, “We got totally lost but we ended up finding this really cool ice cream shop that had so many flavors. We wanna go again soon. The Trees say we have to wait between trips because Kageyama sucks at glamour.” He raised his hands to the side of his head, mimicking ears. “Humans like to wear fake ones, though! They just kept asking him where he bought them.”

Suga laughed at that. He saw it a lot in his city and he knew that little metal cat ear headbands were pretty popular. Oikawa had a pair of headphones that had little ears on them.

“What about your ears?”

Hinata turned to look at Suga, wide eyes blinking in confusion for a moment before things clicked into place. His grin returned, larger than ever.

“Oh, I don’t need a glamor! Watch this!” 

He stopped and spun around and, as he did, there was a loud pop and puff of smoke, blocking Hinata from view. When it cleared, Hinata stood there, looking Human. His ears were rounded, his face was clear of whisker marks, his feet were clad in oversized red sneakers, and his tail was gone.  
“You can shape shift?” 

Hinata nodded then, with another puff of smoke, Suga was looking at a mirror image of himself. 

He resisted the urge to yelp and jump back. It was a little scary to see himself standing there, with a wide, pleased grin on his face. 

“I can change into almost anything!” his mirror image crowed in Hinata’s voice. Suga watched as his knees bent and then jumped straight up in the air higher than Suga ever could, disappearing into another puff of smoke.

Hinata crashed down, his tail waving around excitedly. 

“I can only do things about my size right now, but we came to train with the Trees! They trained the tiny tanuki who could turn into a dragon and they are gonna teach me to do that! I’m gonna be able to turn into a really big dragon! It doesn’t matter how big I am now!”

Suga relaxed at that, smiling at how determined Hinata was and the little drop of information he had let out. 

He was aware of what a tanuki was and it was nice to have some grasp of information in a sea of chaos and confusion. 

“I think you’ll be able to do it,” Suga said, hoping it was the right thing. 

It apparently was- Hinata beamed up at him again, his smile as bright as the sun overhead. 

“Thank you, Suga-san!” 

Despite the fact that his friend was injured and in potential danger, Hinata practically skipped as he lead Suga through the trees. As they walked, the tanuki told him all the different forms he had mastered. The list wasn’t terribly long but it was impressive- at least by Suga’s standards. Shapeshifting at all was a pretty amazing feat to him, and learning about it through someone who was not very intimidating was rather interesting. 

Hinata made the supernatural seem fun and exciting, as opposed to dangerous and terrifying. 

He was describing to Suga how wings worked just like extra-light arms when they entered a very small clearing.

A mound of boulders sat in the middle, covered in moss. They were clustered together with a small gap between them, forming a tiny little miniature cave that had some elegant looking white flowers growing in it. 

On top of the largest boulder sat another kid, who must have been Hinata’s friend based on the way he was dressed. Where Hinata was 90s bright tacky color, his friend was a throw back to grunge; ripped jeans, a white t-shirt with what must have been a band logo, a denim vest, and to top it all off, a red-plaid shirt tied around his waist. He had large pointed black ears sitting on top of his head and behind him, twin fluffy tails, each waving with clear agitation. 

He looked exactly like the kitsunes in the lore Suga was told about as a child.

“You dumbass!” Kageyama snapped, eyes laser focused on Hinata. “That’s not the Guardian!” 

“He smells like a Guardian!” Hinata snapped back and Suga had to keep himself from snorting with laughter. That explained why Hinata had asked him, of all people, for help. 

“That’s a Human!” the kitsune sharply replied, pointing the large stick he was carrying at Suga. Hinata whirled around to stare wide eyed at Suga and all Suga could do was shrug.

“I’m Human,” Suga agreed, feeling a tiny bit bad he hadn’t actually clarified that with Hinata. He had thought the little tanuki had known. “But I can still help? I have some medical knowledge.” 

Hinata ignored his offer by stepping forward and pointedly sniffing at Suga, “But you smell just like the other Guardian and the Forest! You’re even glowing a little bit! That’s not Human!”

Kageyama threw his stick at Hinata like a spear, making the tanuki jump back with a surprised yelp. “He’s the Guardian’s mate, you idiot! That’s why he’s all scented.”

“Then he’s a good Human!”

Suga felt his cheeks heat up; he knew that Daichi had marked him in some way, to help ward off any danger, but he didn’t realize that he also smelled like sex enough for others to think he was Daichi’s mate. 

Hinata huffed up at Kageyama, crossing his arms over his chest as he did. “He said he can help and he’s nice, so get your butt down here! Why are you even up there? I didn’t leave you here!”

The kitsune started to scoot himself forward and Suga could see that not all the rips in his jeans were fashionable; there was one of the back of his leg, showing off a gash, with blood staining the fabric around it. Even from where he was standing, Suga could see his skin was discolored around the wound. It was not a good sign. 

“You left me alone in some trees, running off and yelling about getting help. I knew you’d get lost trying to find me so I came back here,” Kageyama replied. Suga was grateful for his reasoning. 

“I would have found you!” Hinata snapped, moving forward as he did to help Kageyama slide off the boulder. He got a kick to the face for his trouble, and Kageyama hopped down to the ground on his own. It was obvious he wasn’t putting any weight on the injured leg and Suga admired that he had not only come back to the boulders, but had managed to climb up them. 

But he was immediately distracted from the kitsune’s injury as he straightened up into standing; Kageyama was definitely wearing a band shirt. It was a block of color with four people posing with the name of a Swedish pop band from the 90s that Suga knew very well. His mother had frequently played their songs when he was a child.

The shirt clashed so horribly with the grunge vibe the kitsune had but the overall outfit worked very well.

Suga was kind of jealous of it. 

Kageyama was not able to stay up straight for very long; he quickly began to wobble and Hinata rushed forward to keep him steady, letting the kitsune loop his arm around Hinata’s shoulder. 

Suga took the opportunity to move forward and kneel down so he could get a better look at the injury. He wasn’t a doctor or healer by any means, and his medical knowledge mostly came from his own time in the hospital and his writing, but he knew enough that the gash needed to be cleaned. Where Kageyama’s leg was not smeared with blood, it was covered in dirt. There were twigs and leaves and other debris stuck in the drying blood and if Kageyama’s leg wasn’t already turning purple it would have been from possible infection.

The fancy wine back at his bicycle might have helped with that, but Suga had only ever heard of pouring vodka into wounds. He wasn’t sure if the wine even had a high enough alcohol content in it to be of any use, so water would be the next best thing. He had no bottles of water back at the bicycle. 

But the Forest did have streams and hot springs throughout it. 

“Is there a stream nearby?” Suga asked, looking up at the pair. Hinata screwed up his face in thought as Kageyama nodded. 

“A little one, not too far away. It’s not connected to the Springs, though.” 

“Is it one of the siren’s?” Hinata asked in a hush voice, a little scowl on his face. 

Suga hadn't considered either of those things. He knew that the Springs were far away- Daichi had told him- and that things inhabited the water just as they did the land.

But Suga did not know what else to do, though- the wound needed to be cleaned.

He could always take them back to the Cabin, but he wasn’t sure how well that would turn out or if he wanted them to know about it if they were unaware. They seemed like good kids, but they were still supernatural creatures.

He could call for Daichi, who could summon the Healer, but Suga didn’t want to drag him into this mess if he could handle it. 

He didn’t always need saving. 

He could always call Daichi after they cleaned the wound, if it was worse than Suga expected. 

“Do you think you can walk to it?” Suga asked, looking to Kageyama.

“I can carry you!” Hinata offered, earning a smack to the back of the head.

“I can walk to it,” Kageyama replied with a huff and a scowl, but made no move to pull away from the tanuki. 

Suga pushed himself into standing and nodded that he was ready to go. Kageyama began to lead the way, which was a tad bit awkward, given that he moved the slowest. Suga tried to slow his pace down, but ended up more pausing between steps more than anything. 

As they shuffled back into the treeline, Suga looked down at Kageyama’s wound again. The first step would be to clean it, but they needed to wrap it after. He didn’t have any bandages and wrapping it up in dirty fabric would make cleaning it pointless. He looked back to the pair of boys in front of him.

“Hinata, I know you can shapeshift, but would you be able to create a bandage roll?” Suga asked.

Hinata shook his head, “I can’t really just create things. Not yet, anyways! The Trees are going to teach me! But if I made them now they’d poof away when I changed back!” 

Suga thought that over; maybe he could use his undershirt as a bandage for now, until they could get something more suitable.

Kageyama would need to visit the Springs or Ennoshita either way if the wound was more than just a gash. Being discolored made it seem like it leaned more away from that, but beyond limping, the kitsune seemed fine. 

“Maybe the Trees can teach Kageyama healing magic, too, so he’s not useless if he gets hurt again,” Hinata said, voice loud and on the edge of teasing. 

“I’m not useless, dumbass! It got my leg! You’d be useless if it hit you!” 

“It wouldn’t get me- I’m too fast!” 

“One got you last week!”

“It didn’t hurt me, though! And I got away!” 

“It still got you!”

“It doesn’t count!”

The back and forth was loud, much louder than anything around them, but it made Suga smile. The banter sounded harsh and angry, but Suga could see the underlying friendship. They reminded him of Oikawa and Iwaizumi; loud and insulting to each other, but thicker than thieves. 

They reminded him that the Forest didn’t just house monsters. 

Hinata and Kageyama segued into another equally loud back and forth and Suga had no idea what they were going on about, but he didn’t mind listening and chuckling at the angry squawks and swats at each other. 

Sooner than he expected, the trees began to thin out again and he expected to see glints of water in the distance as the sun was able to shine down through the canopy.

But before Suga could spy any hints of a possible stream, the sunbeams suddenly disappeared, overtaken by a large shadow.

Suga threw his arm out as he came to a halt, hitting Hinata in the chest with it. He heard the tanuki start to say something, but it quickly turned into a muffled noise. A glance to the side showed Kageyama clamping his hand over Hinata’s mouth, looking ahead with wide eyes.

Suga turned his gaze back forward, heart starting to pound in his chest as the earth beneath them trembled. 

Ahead of them, something was moving. It looked like another tree, thick and dark and tall, but as Suga’s eyes moved up he saw it was attached to something else. 

A body.

The thing in front of them was just a leg.

Suga’s breath caught in his throat as more of the whatever it was came into view- its slow, shuffling steps making the ground quake under it. 

It was bipedal, but slumped over backwards, leading with its pelvis. Its arms, longer and thicker than trees, trailed behind it, and ended in dark claws. Markings on its torso became visible, looking like tribal tattoos but glowing a dull gold. The markings extended up the things neck and head. It had long, pointed ears on the top of its head, which for, whatever reason, reminded Suga of a giraffe. 

But its ears were the only thing that reminded Suga of something tangible. 

The thing’s face - it didn’t have a face. 

It had six blank white orbs on its head that Suga assumed were eyes. 

Six white orbs that were all staring directly at them. Its head was tilted to face them. 

Suga wanted to scream, but he couldn’t move. 

He couldn’t do anything but stare back, except for when the thing began to straighten up. 

Suga stepped back, away from the monster. His arm was still out and he forced Hinata, and in turn Kageyama, back with him. The tanuki let out another, thankfully still muffled, noise.

The giraffe eared monster’s movements were jerky, like a clockwork doll, or like its spine- if it had one- couldn't support its upper body weight. It took almost a full minute for the thing to straighten up to its full height, extending far above the top of the trees and its head barely visible above the canopy.

The air was still and silent and Suga wanted to run and scream for Daichi. 

But neither his legs nor mouth would work and he couldn't leave Kageyama, not when all of this was his idea. He should have just called -

His mind went blank as the air shook with a death rattle. It was so low he could barely hear it, but he could feel it vibrating in his chest, in his soul. It felt like it was sucking the breath from his lungs, and the longer it went on, the colder he felt. 

But then it suddenly stopped and, with not even a whoosh of wind and faster than Suga could comprehend, it collapsed back down so it was once again slumped. Then, with more broken movements, its head turned skyward. 

Suga jumped and barely held back a scream as Hinata grabbed onto his arm and tugged him back. 

As Suga began to move, the giraffe ear monster stepped forward, the earth shaking under its massive foot, and continued forward on its path parallel to them. 

It didn’t come any closer and seemed to dismiss their existence. 

Suga didn’t release the breath he was holding until long after the ground stopped quaking and the sunlight began to filter down again.

“What the hell was that?” he asked, turning his head to look to Hinata and Kageyama. They were both still visibly shaken and Hinata had to pry the kitsune’s hand away so he could speak.

“I have no clue but it was massive! Did you see how far over the treetops it went?! Its leg was as big as the tree! It could have eaten us up in one gulp! If it had a mouth!”

“It had a mouth,” Kageyama said, eyes glancing in the direction the monster had gone. “On its chest. I saw it when it was standing.”

“Oh, that’s so fucking creepy,” Suga mumbled, putting a hand over his chest. His heart was still pounding in his chest but, for the first time, Suga realized the thing in his chest, the bond, the Life, hadn’t reacted to the giraffe ear monster at all.

It had reacted to the frogs, letting him know he was in danger and where to run, but it had been silent just then. Was it because he hadn’t used the Life recently?

Or because the monster had been no threat to them?

“Do you think it will come back?” Hinata asked in a whisper. 

Suga took a chance and shook his head, trusting his bond, “I don’t think it was interested in us.” 

Hinata made a little disgusted face and then looked up to Suga, “Should we keep going?” 

“Yeah,” Kageyama replied, starting to push forward already, “The Human thinks we should go to the stream, and he’s the Guardian’s mate, so I trust that.”

“His name is Suga-san!” 

“You didn’t tell me that, you dumbass! You didn’t give any introductions!”

And, just like that, the fear and the tense situation were dissolved and Suga took the moment to properly introduce himself.

“I’m Kageyama, and I’m a kitsune. Hinata-dumbass is a tanuki,” Kageyama confirmed, pointing between them. 

Suga gave a grateful little smile, “Thank you for letting me know. I’m...still learning.”

Kageyama gave a firm little nod, “We are still learning about this realm and Humans.”

“So we get it!” Hinata added with a beaming smile. It helped to relieve any lingering tension. 

“I think the stream is nearby. I can hear the water,” Kageyama said, his ears twitching as they walked. He had them turn- thankfully not in the direction the monster had gone- and, within a few minutes, they came upon the stream.

The stream was a little over a meter wide and looked like it would reach Suga’s knees at the deepest part. The water was crystal clear and slow moving, with minnows swimming in little schools up and down the current. 

The peacefulness of the scene was emphasized by little pink and yellow flowers clustering around the stream’s edge, basking in the sunbeams. 

“It looks clean enough to wash out your wound in,” Suga commented as he knelt down to feel the temperature of the water. It was refreshingly cool.

Kageyama sat beside him, stretching out his leg and trying to roll up his jeans. Hinata crouched beside his friend, his tail waving around behind him.

“You should just rip them, they have enough holes in them alread -ack!” 

The tanuki screamed as Kageyama oh so casually pushed him into the water. Hinata flailed, trying to unsuccessfully right himself and Suga couldn’t help but let out a bark of laughter. 

“I can’t swim!” Hinata cried, still flailing. 

“It is shallow enough to stand in!” Kageyama snapped, but there was a tiny amused smirk on his face.

“Maybe for you tall people! But I’m short! I can’t swim!”

“You’re a shapeshifter! Make yourself taller!”

“You come down here and say that!” 

“Here, Hinata,” Suga said as he reached out his arm, his voice a little breathless from laughter. Hinata latched onto his arm, still not upright, and Suga pulled him back onto the bank. Once out of the water, he shook his tail, spraying droplets all over Kageyama. The kitsune moved to shove him back in the water, but Suga caught his hand before it connected. 

“I need to clean your wound.”

Kageyama glowered, but after moment dropped his arm so he could finish rolling up his pants leg. As the kitsune did that, Suga considered what he could use to not only help clean the wound, but to wrap it. He eyed the plaid shirt tied around the kitsune’s waist. It was mildly clean and easier to access than his undershirt.

But would it be rude to ask?

It would be ruder to let Kageyama get an infection.

“I need to wrap it up after it’s clean. Can we use your…” He trailed off, gesturing to plaid shirt. 

Kageyama looked down then nodded, undoing the tie and tossing it at Suga with a casual, “I have more.”

Which helped Suga feel a little better as he began to tear the sleeves into strips. He made two long ones to act as bandages and then a smaller one to be used as a washcloth. As he laid them out on the rest of the shirt, he wished that he had anti-bacterial cream, but he knew that wouldn’t happen unless they went back to the Cabin.

They would have to make do. 

Suga moved so that he was next to the water, with Kageyama’s calf resting in his lap, then began to clean the wound. He picked away the big debris first, then, with a gentle hand, used the wash cloth to start washing the blood and dirt away. 

Hinata leaned over Kageyama’s shoulder, watching with interest as Suga worked. “Are you a Healer?” he asked.

Suga smiled at the question as he shook his head, “No, but I’ve been around them a lot. And a while ago I had a pretty bad wound. I didn’t clean it myself, but I watched how the nurses- the Human Healers- cleaned it. And I write a lot. Mostly about people getting hurt, and I like things to be accurate. So I research a lot, and some of that involves knowing how to take care of wounds.”

“Ah, Suga-san, that is so cool! Do you know a lot of cool things?” 

Suga laughed, “It depends on what you find cool?”

“I think Humans are cool! Do you know a lot about them? I mean, I know you are one but not all Humans are the same! Like, Kageyama is a kitsune, but he’s super different from other ones! Other kitsunes are super smart and pretty!” 

“Are you saying I’m not pretty, dumbass?!” 

“Well, you sure aren’t smart!” 

Suga tugged on Kageyama’s leg to keep him from lunging at Hinata, careful to not agitate the wound, “Don’t move.”

The kitsune crossed his arms over his chest and his ears laid back, “Well, I’m a lot smarter and prettier than you.”

“Well that’s not hard, dummy,” Hinata said as he crouched back down, closer to Suga this time. “Suga-san, you’re really pretty. For a human.”

Suga gave an amused little snort then smiled at both of them, “Thank you. You two are both pretty as well.” They had boyish charm, faces still round with youth, and he was sure Kageyama would grow into whatever they considered to be ‘pretty’ for a kitsune. 

The comment had both of them looking away from Suga, blushes tinting their cheeks and trying hard to not look embarrassed. Suga grinned over it, then turned his eyes back to Kageyama’s wound.

With the blood and dirt cleared away, Suga realized it was a lot worse than he had originally thought. Not only was the skin around the wound discolored with splotches of purple and yellow, but the actually inner of the gash- which was as long as his middle finger- was black and looked goopy. Blood was dripping from the bottom edge of the wound still, mixing with the black and streaking the kitsune’s leg. 

“Kageyama,” Suga started slowly, not wanting to alarm or panic the poor boy, “On like a scale of one to ten, how badly does it hurt?”

The kitsune thought a moment, ears twitching back up, before he shrugged, “I can’t feel it at all.”

That was slightly worrisome. Suga poked at the flesh beside the wound, “Can you feel that?”

“No.”

“So your leg is numb?”

“Yeah,” he said, like he didn’t realize that was bad thing.

Suga needed to wrap his wound and get him to Ennoshita. Black wounds were never good, double so if the area around the wound was numb, and he was sure that logic also applied to supernatural injuries. 

He felt a little bit responsible for the kitsune and his friend. Suga had said he would help and he really should have checked the wound first before cleaning it. He should have taken his stupid pride and shoved it and called for Daichi. They had been looking for him in the first place. How much worse had Kageyama’s wound gotten by movi-

His train of panic was cut off by a small tug in his chest. It was faint, and barely there, but it was insistent and warm. It was coming from behind him. 

Suga looked over his shoulder, expecting to see Daichi, but nothing was there. It was just as peacefully empty as when they had arrived.

There was another little tug and. in the corner of his eye, he saw the flowers at the edge of the bank move. 

There was no breeze. 

Suga turned to look over his other shoulder, looking at the flowers head on. The leaves of the bushes were swaying up and down, and he could see the faintest of glows on the petals, like someone was shining a weak flashlight on them.

“Suga-san, is there something wrong?”

Suga glanced back to Kageyama and Hinata. They were from another realm, probably still just kids or kits or welps, whatever their species called their young, and they were looking to Suga for help. 

Kageyama’s leg was leaking black. 

The thing in his chest tugged again and Suga knew if he used Life it could cure whatever was wrong with Kageyama. He had no idea how he knew- there was no proof, except the thing inside of him telling him it was so. 

He could help, but at what cost to him? Would it be safe to use the Life? Would it create a bond between him and Kageyama? 

He didn’t want another bond. 

But he wanted to help. 

The thing in his chest tugged again, but a tiny bit stronger and, as it did, Suga heard the faintest of whispers, like someone was breathing into his ear. He did not know the language of the words, but he knew the meaning.

Just like he knew about the Life.

He turned to look at the flowers again and they were still swaying in nothingness and glowing. 

‘Use us,’ they called to him.

Use the Life inside of the flowers instead of his own Life, just act as a conduit, and help Kageyama. 

“Suga-san?” 

Before Suga had processed his decision, he was reaching for the flowers. 

Warmth rushed to the tips of his fingers, giving them a faint, but visible glow, just as the flowers had. He could smell hints of coffee in the air.

“Suga-san?” Hinata repeated, just as Suga’s fingers brushed the tips of the petals. 

He could feel the Life inside the flower, young and bright and eager to help. They weren’t so much true emotions as just base things that coursed through him, but he felt them, and directed them. He turned his palm skyward and coaxed the Life towards him.

It looked like a gumball machine, little spheres dropping into his hand one after another. 

Six tiny glowing orb sitting in his palm, waiting to be used to help heal a being who had ventured into the Forest. A being who had been injured by the disgusting plague of frogs who were wreaking havoc in a once peaceful place. The flowers would give up their Life to help the kitsune, then regrow and bloom again next Spring. 

Kageyama and Hinata were looking at him in slack jawed awe as he turned back to face them, carefully cradling the Life in his hand. 

“Your leg is infected,” he stated, “This will cure it and heal your leg. It won’t hurt.” 

Kageyama gave a jerky nod, then, without much show, the silver haired man tilted his hand so the beads of Life dropped into the wound. 

They burst as they touched the kitsune's skin, essence of coffee and citrus filling the air, and their glow sank down into the wound. He watched as the black slowly began to fade from the wound, and as it did, the gash began to close. 

It was not as sci-fi movie as he expected it to be; the wound just seemed to shrink and close until it was just a red scar. 

“That was so cool!” Hinata gasped, breaking the silence of the moment. “How did you do that? You know magic?! I didn’t think Humans knew magic! You were all glowy and wah and you did it so easily! It was so cool and it smells goo- oh, Suga-san, you look tired now?” 

He was a little tired. He certainly would not say no to a nap, but he wasn’t he exhausted like he had been before after using Life. Maybe because it hadn’t been his own?

Suga offered Kageyama and Hinata a hopefully warm smile before focusing on the kitsune, “how do you feel?”

“It tingles,” Kageyama replied, a little frown forming on his lips, “Which is good, I guess? I couldn’t feel it before.”

“Can you feel this?” Hinata asked as he reached over to pinch Kageyama’s calf. The kitsune yelped, then shoved Hinata across Suga’s lap and into the water.

“Well, I guess that answered that,” Suga said, trying to not laugh and keep composed as he reached to pull the tanuki out of the water before he could start complaining out not being able to swim.

Hinata shook the water off of him once he was on land, spraying both Suga and Kageyama with droplets. Suga let himself laugh at that while the kitsune squawked, “You’re getting us all wet, dumbass!” 

“Then stop shoving me in the water!”

“Come closer so I can shove you into the dirt instead!” 

“Kageyama,” Suga said, trying to intervene before the pair ended up wrestling, because he really did not put it past them to do so, “Can you try standing and putting weight on your leg?” 

The kitsune moved to do as Suga asked, careful in case his leg gave out. Once he was standing, he shifted his weight so it was evenly balanced. He waited a moment, then began to hop up and down, knees going all the way up to his chest. 

“Like it never happened,” he said as he stopped jumping. “Why didn’t you just do that in the first place?”

Suga pushed himself up into standing, rubbing the back of his neck is he did. “I’m not really supposed to use it. I didn’t think the inside of it would be all black like it was.”

“Oh, well, then, thank you, anyways. For cleaning it and healing it. I can see why you’re the Guardian’s mate.” 

Suga’s cheeks began to heat up and he knew he was blushing. “Glad I could hel-”

He cut himself off as the thing in his chest gave another tugged, but this one was different. It was frantic and like a warning. 

“Something’s coming,” Kageyama stated, voice low. His ears were twitching, changing angles just slightly like he was searching for the source.

“The big thing?” Hinata asked in a hushed voice.

It was Suga who replied. “No, not the big thing.” The giraffe ear monster hadn’t set off warning bells inside of him. The thing inside his chest hadn’t been frightened of the monster. 

There was a series of thuds in the distance and all three of them turned towards the noise. 

Kageyama’s lips dipped into a frown before stating, “Frogs.” 

Then he turned, twin tails lashing behind him, and began to sprint in the opposite direction, grabbing onto Hinata’s wrist as he went. Suga took off after them and was surprised that he was able to keep up.

He thought they would have been able to run faster.

“They won’t go to the main road,” Kageyama called out as they darted between trees. “They don’t like being exposed like that. If we get there, you’ll be safe!”

“Why don’t we fight them?!” Hinata snapped, his arm still out in front of him as Kageyama kept a tight grip on his wrist.

“Because we’re with the Guardian’s mate, you idiot! We can’t let him get hurt and there’s too many for us to fight alone and keep him safe!” 

Suga looked to Kageyama’s back in surprise. The kitsune wanted to protect him? Even if it was because his relationship with Daichi, he was still surprised by it. Kageyama and Hinata seemed like the type to dive right into a fight, but the kitsune was thinking of him.

He was glad to have used the Life on Kageyama. 

Even if it probably was what had attracted the frogs.

Which seemed to be getting closer. 

He could hear the ribbits behind him now, and the thuds were getting louder. The frogs, if they were anything like the ones he had encountered before, could cover more distance than they could. 

Suga had no idea where the main road was and prayed that Kageyama did. His weaving and turning seemed as random as Hinata’s had and if they didn’t reach the main road soon, the frogs would catch up.

He pushed himself to run harder, until he was right beside Hinata. The tanuki reached out and grabbed his wrist, making a chain of the three of them. 

They burst through the tree line as Suga’s lungs began to burn and he stumbled as they slowed to a stop in the middle of the road, collapsing down to his knees and panting. Hinata let go of his wrist and moved to stand between Suga and the treeline, side by side with Kageyama.

“Can we fight them now?” Hinata asked, a bit of a challenge and eagerness in his voice. 

Suga looked up to see him flexing his fingers, which had sharpened into claws. Kageyama’s hands were encased in silent orange flames.

“If they come out onto the road, yeah,” the kitsune answered. 

Suga looked to the treeline.

The thuds and ribbits were almost to them. 

Suga didn’t want to see them fight.

Suga didn’t wan-

The ribbits turned into screams and before Suga could blink a circle of flames erupted around him, higher than he was tall. But the flames gave off no heat and through them, he could see Kageyama had thrown a hand back behind him, and the flame that had been around his hand was gone.

Suga was surrounded by a protective shield of fox fire. 

He stayed kneeling on the ground, trying to see the tree line from between the flames and the two tense figures in front of him. The frogs were still screaming, but they were dropping off one by one.

As if something was silencing them.

Until they were all silent. 

Suga tried to swallow around the lump forming in his throat. What the hell was going on, what had happened to the frogs?

What had taken care of what was chasing them?

“Well, at least you are wearing shoes this time.” 

Relief flooded through Suga and he scrambled to stand up.

“Daichi!” 

“That’s the Guardian, you dumbass,” Kageyama hissed to Hinata as he snuffed out the protective circle around Suga. Suga stepped forward, to be between the kitsune and tanuki, and all of his relief vanished at the sight of Daichi.

He was wearing just a scowl, with his arms crossed over his chest and his brows knit down. He was radiating anger and Suga could feel prickles of annoyance through their bond. 

Suga wanted to step back again and have Kageyama put back up his shield of fire. 

Daichi looked between Kageyama and Hinata, his scowl deepening. “You two are lucky that you were not deeper in the Forest. An injured kitsune and a naive tanuki are delicious treats for a fair many creatures here. Bringing in a Human would have made it a feast. This realm is not a playground- do not let its peaceful nature fool you.”

“I’m not injured,” Kageyama countered, puffing up his chest a little. 

It was the wrong move. 

Daichi stepped forward, his arms dropping to his sides and eyes narrowing as he did. “Do you not think I can smell the blood on you and sense the Life in the air?” he asked with a snarl in his voice. 

Kageyama backed down, his ears flattening against his head. 

Daichi softened just a fraction. “Go back to your bidding, but keep aware of what is around you. And stay away from the frogs.”

Hinata and Kageyama nodded at the same time, then both turned to look at Suga. 

“Thank you for helping us, Suga-san,” the tanuki mumbled.

“Thank you, Suga-san,” Kageyama echoed. 

Suga reached out and ruffled both of their hair lightly, offering them a smile. “Thank you for protecting me. Stay safe, okay?”

They both nodded again before Kageyama all but pushed Hinata back towards the tree line. Suga watched them disappear into the shadows before turning to look back at Daichi.

The Guardian looked exhausted. All the anger had drained from his face and his shoulders slumped a bit. 

Suga swallowed thickly as amber eyes looked over him, searching him for something Suga didn’t quite know. The annoyance coming from their bond was replaced with worry as Daichi closed the distance between them, reaching as he did to cup Suga’s cheek.

“I thought I had lost you.” 

Suga pushed into his touch, closing his eyes as he did, “I’m sorry, I-”

“You cannot just go off the path with random beings, Koushi. It is not safe. You are protected, but some might ignore that. The frogs clearly do. You have Life, my Life, inside of you but it cannot always protect you. When the helchnod sounded, I thought…” Daichi trailed off with a deep sigh. “You cannot go into the trees alone. Please promise me you will not do something so foolish again.” 

Suga cracked open his eyes. Daichi looked so worried, so upset. Guilt coursed through him.

“I’m sorry. I promise I won’t do it again. I thought I could help, I didn’t….I didn’t want to bother you.” He didn’t want to have to rely on Daichi. 

“You will never bother me. I would much rather come and help you than have to find your body.” Daichi sighed again and slowly began to rub his thumb over Suga’s cheek. “The Life you used was not your own.”

“No,” Suga confirmed, wishing he could push more into Daichi’s touch. “I pulled it from some flowers. They offered it.”

Daichi frowned, but did not push for an explanation, “Do not use more Life, please. Anyone’s. The frogs seemed to be drawn to the use of it.”

Suga promised. He did want any more encounters with frogs. He was starting to resent the creatures, even the non-magical demon ones. 

“Let's get you back to the Cabin. I can feel the exhaustion coming from you,” Daichi said, dropping his arm and stepping back. “I think a nap is in order for the both of us.” 

He turned and began to make his way up the path, but Suga stood still watching him. Daichi quickly realized he was not following and turned back to him. 

“Koushi?”

“We have to go get the bike first. Its somewhere on the path...full of groceries.”

Daichi shook his head then gave Suga a wary smile, “We will go find the bike, but we will have to postpone dinner. I can guarantee you that your groceries have been ransacked by now.”

Suga’s heart dropped.

“They better not have gotten my wine.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are always appreciated and so is coming to yell at me about volleyball boys on tumblr.


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